Jeff the Killer
This story is part 1 of 3 in the Jeff the Killer series.
| Written by | Sesseur |
|---|---|
| Published on Creepypasta.com | August 2012 |
| Length | 4,299 words · about 20 minutes to read |
| Story level | Medium |
| Reader rating | 8.7/10 from 45,335 votes |
| Category | Madness, Paranoia, and Mental Illness |
Jeff the Killer Origins and History
You wake at 3AM. Disturbed by some subtle shifting sound within the room, just on the edge of hearing. Propping up on one arm you survey the room looking for some source for the noise, hoping beyond hope that you won’t find one. At first, your hopes are raised, everything seems to be silent, everything seems to be still. But it isn’t.
From behind the long concealing drape of the curtain a voice, with flickering serpentine hiss whispers
“Go to sleep…”. Suddenly, you know what’s about to happen and exactly who is waiting to meet you.
As recognizable and widely known as he is feared, Jeff the Killer, the eponymous villain of numerous stories littering the internet is one of the best-known and most widely referenced Creepypasta characters to have emerged from the shadowy corners of the web over the past few decades.
But exactly who or what is this infamous denizen of the darkness? Where did the character come from, how has it evolved, and from which horrific pit of hell or the internet did ‘that’ haunting image emerge?
Overview and Synopsis of Jeff The Killer at a Glance
Firstly, for those unfamiliar with the character ‘Jeff the Killer’ the most widely known Creepypasta on this character can be found here. The story is usually linked to a version of this image in which the character is shown to be noseless, with bleached white skin, a leering permanent grin and lank black hair.
For those wanting a quick overview, the story of Jeff Killer goes something like this:
At thirteen years old Jeff ( Jeffery Alan Woods or Jeff C. Hodek depending upon who you ask, but more on that later) moves with his parents and brother Lui to a new town. Here, Jeff and his sibling encounter three bullies and are threatened with knives.
Jeff beats these bullies badly, with Lui taking the blame for the assault and being carted off by the ever-reliable police. Guilt-ridden and depressed at having let Lui take the blame for his actions, Jeff’s day gets even worse when he meets the bullies again and is horribly burnt in an attack with alcohol and bleach.
This burning results in Jeff being permanently disfigured, his skin bleached white, physically whilst his mind ‘snaps’.
Upon being discharged for some reason (his doctors apparently attributing Jeff’s insane behavior to the painkillers he is taking) Jeff arrives home and proceeds to make a bad situation worse by purposely mutilating his already disfigured face, cutting a permanent smile into his mouth and cheeks and burning of his eyelids so that he can always see his face.
Jeff then goes on to kill both his parents and his brother Lui, meeting him with the instruction ‘Go to sleep’ before stabbing him and disappearing on a wider and less discriminating killing spree, which it would seem, continues to this day.
Jeff The Killer Appearance and Origins
According to the Creepypasta explanations Jeff’s fixed grin is due to scarring he inflicted upon himself, his eyes stare widely because he burnt off his own eyelids, and his skin is lilly white as a result of having been horribly burnt by bullies with a combination of alcohol and bleach.
The ‘photograph’ that accompanies the many Jeff the Killer stories and which looks like a cross between Micheal Jackson and a demented dolphin, is widely known not only for the many derivative creepypastas using the character but due to its widespread use in screamer videos alongside Jeff’s famous catchphrase ‘Go to sleep’.
However, it seems that the details of exactly how Jeff The Killer ended up with his hideous appearance corresponding as they do to this image, were retrofitted, the rationales being written to match the image, rather than the other way around…
Jeff Photos and Folklore
As with many creepypasta characters, there seems to have been an ekphrastic element to Jeff the Killer’s Creation. What the hell does ekphrastic mean? Well, basically it means ‘based on or inspired by a work of art’.
Now, whilst most wouldn’t look at the image of Jeff the Killer and regard it as ‘art’ it is commonly agreed the image upon which the story of Jeff the Killer is based actually predates the words making up his story, meaning that the creators began with the creepy image and went from there. The story was written to fit the picture,
Therefore to really get a handle on the origins of Jeff the Killer it is first necessary to divide the investigation into two parts. First, we need to look at the origin of the image of Jeff The Killer that accompanied the original story, not to mention the many derivative stories and memes that have evolved from it, and then look at where the story that grew out of the image came from.
Interestingly, the original ‘Jeff the Killer’ image and its origin have developed a mythology all of its own, with various competing theories and bogus explanations being put forward. Let’s have a go at unpicking them.
The first noted appearance of the famous image is from way back in 2005 on pya.cc a Japanese message board.
The image later appeared in a Japanese YouTube video “NNN臨時放送”, a clip identified by some as scary film project, in which names and ages of future victims are listed. The video was uploaded in August of 2007 and features a fleeting glimpse of the Jeff the Killer image which can be seen on screen at the 4 minutes eleven seconds mark followed by the words ‘good night’ which may be an early incarnation of, (or the inspiration for) the famous ‘Go to Sleep’ catchphrase with which Jeff is associated.
That this video without a backstory or explanation existed before the story or even the name ‘Jeff the Killer’ surfaced seems to confirm that it was indeed the image that came first. The association of the image with the name ‘Jeff the Killer’ or any related title came in 2008 when a user on the forum Newgrounds uploaded the image using the name Killerjeff with the somewhat dubious claim that the image was a self-portrait depicting him.
Shortly following this first association of the photograph with the name, the first incarnation of anything resembling an actual story for Jeff The Killer (and featuring the now famous image) was a video uploaded by Sesseur on October 3rd 2008, with some sources claiming Sesseur and the previous Newgrounds uploader ‘Killerjeff’ to be the same person.
This original video which notably contained music by Pixies (which may have been the reason that the video was eventually removed) has been claimed by its creator as the original Jeff the Killer origin story and indeed does predate the more well known Creepypasta version of the tale.
Additionally, it is worth noting that Sesseur ( consequently cited by most sources as Jeff’s creator) has been critical of the details given in later incarnations of the story, insisting, presumably in reference to his original conception of the character, that bullies were not involved in the accident that led to Jeff’s altered appearance, but rather that he slipped on some soap whilst carrying acid he intended to use to clean the drains in his bathroom. Sesseur has also pointed out in his version Jeff does not kill his parents and brother and even has a different real name ( Jeff C. Hodek rather than Jeff Wood).
The later Creepypasta incarnations of Jeff The Killer, upon which the above synopsis is based, also have a somewhat convoluted history.
Despite being very popular, the original version uploaded in 2011 was derided by many as being weakly told and of low quality with many insisting that the story did not meet the quality assurance standards of the site.
It was eventually moved from Creepypasta to a sister site dedicated to badly written Creepypastas. However, owing to the popularity of the character this removal prompted many users to simply reupload the story. In an attempt to placate these fans and to establish a ‘better’ version of Jeff’s story a competition was launched in 2015 to create a ‘re-make’. The winning story, which exists in an uncut longer version and a shorter version (edited to fit the constraints of the competition’s word limit) was written by K Banning Kellum is the version with which most people today are familiar.
Jeff The Killer Creepypasta Story
Excerpt from a local newspaper: OMINOUS UNKNOWN KILLER IS STILL AT LARGE.
After weeks of unexplained murders, the ominous unknown killer is still on the rise. After little evidence has been found, a young boy states that he survived one of the killer’s attacks and bravely tells his story.
“I had a bad dream and I woke up in the middle of the night,” says the boy, “I saw that for some reason the window was open, even though I remember it being closed before I went to bed. I got up and shut it once more. Afterwards, I simply crawled under my covers and tried to get back to sleep. That’s when I had a strange feeling, like someone was watching me.
I looked up and nearly jumped out of my bed. There, in the little ray of light, illuminating from between my curtains, were a pair of two eyes. These weren’t regular eyes; they were dark, ominous eyes. They were bordered in black and… just plain out terrified me. That’s when I saw his mouth. A long, horrendous smile that made every hair on my body stand up. The figure stood there, watching me. Finally, after what seemed like forever, he said it. A simple phrase, but said in a way only a mad man could speak.
“He said, ‘Go To Sleep.’ I let out a scream, that’s what sent him at me. He pulled up a knife; aiming at my heart. He jumped on top of my bed. I fought him back; I kicked, I punched, I rolled around, trying to knock him off me. That’s when my dad busted in. The man threw the knife, it went into my dad’s shoulder. The man probably would’ve finished him off, if one of the neighbors hadn’t alerted the police.
“They drove into the parking lot and ran towards the door. The man turned and ran down the hallway. I heard a smash, like glass breaking. As I came out of my room, I saw the window that was pointing towards the back of my house was broken. I looked out it to see him vanish into the distance. I can tell you one thing, I will never forget that face. Those cold, evil eyes, and that psychotic smile. They will never leave my head.”
Police are still on the look for this man. If you see anyone that fits the description in this story, please contact your local police department.
Jeff and his family had just moved into a new neighborhood. His dad had gotten a promotion at work, and they thought it would be best to live in one of those “fancy” neighborhoods. Jeff and his brother Liu couldn’t complain though. A new, better house. What was not to love? As they were getting unpacked, one of their neighbors came by.
“Hello,” she said, “I’m Barbara; I live across the street from you. Well, I just wanted to introduce my self and to introduce my son.” She turns around and calls her son over. “Billy, these are our new neighbors,” Billy said hi and ran back to play in his yard.
“Well,” said Jeff’s mom, “I’m Margaret, and this is my husband Peter, and my two sons, Jeff and Liu.” They each introduced themselves, and then Barbara invited them to her son’s birthday. Jeff and his brother were about to object when their mother said that they would love to. When Jeff and his family were done packing, Jeff went up to his mom.
“Mom, why would you invite us to some kid’s party? If you haven’t noticed, I’m not some dumb kid.”
“Jeff,” said his mother, “We just moved here; we should show that we want to spend time with our neighbors. Now, we’re going to that party, and that’s final.” Jeff started to talk, but stopped himself, knowing that he couldn’t do anything. Whenever his mom said something, it was final. He walked up to his room and plopped down on his bed. He sat there looking at his ceiling when suddenly, he got a weird feeling. Not so much pain, but… a weird feeling. He dismissed it as just some random feeling. He heard his mother call him down to get his stuff, and he walked down to get it.
The next day, Jeff walked downstairs to get breakfast and got ready for school. As he sat there, eating his breakfast, he once again got that feeling. This time it was stronger. It gave him a slight tugging pain, but he once again dismissed it. As he and Liu finished breakfast, they walked down to the bus stop. They sat there waiting for the bus, and then, all of a sudden, some kid on a skateboard jumped over them, only inches above their laps. They both jumped back in surprise. “Hey, what the hell?”
The kid landed and turned back to them. He kicked his skateboard up and caught it with his hands. The kid seems to be about twelve; one year younger than Jeff. He wears an Aeropostale shirt and ripped blue jeans.
“Well, well, well. It looks like we got some new meat.” Suddenly, two other kids appeared. One was super skinny and the other was huge. “Well, since you’re new here, I’d like to introduce ourselves, over there is Keith.” Jeff and Liu looked over to the skinny kid. He had a dopey face that you would expect a sidekick to have. “And he’s Troy.” They looked over at the fat kid. Talk about a tub of lard. This kid looked like he hadn’t exercised since he was crawling.
“And I,” said the first kid, “am Randy. Now, for all the kids in this neighborhood, there is a small price for bus fare, if you catch my drift.” Liu stood up, ready to punch the lights out of the kid’s eyes when one of his friends pulled a knife on him. “Tsk, tsk, tsk, I had hoped you would be more cooperative, but it seems we must do this the hard way.” The kid walked up to Liu and took his wallet out of his pocket. Jeff got that feeling again. Now, it was truly strong; a burning sensation. He stood up, but Liu gestured him to sit down. Jeff ignored him and walked up to the kid.
“Listen here you little punk, give back my bro’s wallet or else.” Randy put the wallet in his pocket and pulled out his own knife.
“Oh? And what will you do?” Just as he finished the sentence, Jeff popped the kid in the nose. As Randy reached for his face, Jeff grabbed the kid’s wrist and broke it. Randy screamed and Jeff grabbed the knife from his hand. Troy and Keith rushed Jeff, but Jeff was too quick. He threw Randy to the ground. Keith lashed out at him, but Jeff ducked and stabbed him in the arm. Keith dropped his knife and fell to the ground screaming. Troy rushed him too, but Jeff didn’t even need the knife. He just punched Troy straight in the stomach and Troy went down. As he fell, he puked all over. Liu could do nothing but look in amazement at Jeff.
“Jeff how’d you?” was all he said. They saw the bus coming and knew they’d be blamed for the whole thing. So they started running as fast as they could. As they ran, they looked back and saw the bus driver rushing over to Randy and the others. As Jeff and Liu made it to school, they didn’t dare tell what happened. All they did was sit and listen. Liu just thought of that as his brother beating up a few kids, but Jeff knew it was more. It was something, scary. As he got that feeling he felt how powerful it was, the urge to just, hurt someone.
He didn’t like how it sounded, but he couldn’t help feeling happy. He felt that strange feeling go away, and stay away for the entire day of school. Even as he walked home due to the whole thing near the bus stop, and how now he probably wouldn’t be taking the bus anymore, he felt happy. When he got home his parents asked him how his day was, and he said, in a somewhat ominous voice, “It was a wonderful day.” Next morning, he heard a knock at his front door. He walked down to find two police officers at the door, his mother looking back at him with an angry look.
“Jeff, these officers tell me that you attacked three kids. That it wasn’t regular fighting, and that they were stabbed. Stabbed, son!” Jeff’s gaze fell to the floor, showing his mother that it was true.
“Mom, they were the ones who pulled the knives on me and Liu.”
“Son,” said one of the cops,” We found three kids, two stabbed, one having a bruise on his stomach, and we have witnesses proving that you fled the scene. Now, what does that tell us?” Jeff knew it was no use. He could say him and Liu had been attacked, but then there was no proof it was not them who attacked first. They couldn’t say that they weren’t fleeing, because truth be told they were. So Jeff couldn’t defend himself or Liu.
“Son, call down your brother.” Jeff couldn’t do it since it was he who beat up all the kids.
“Sir, it…it was me. I was the one who beat up the kids. Liu tried to hold me back, but he couldn’t stop me.” The cop looked at his partner and they both nod.
“Well, kid, looks like a year in juvie…”
“Wait!” says Liu. They all looked up to see him holding a knife. The officers pulled their guns and locked them on Liu.
“It was me, I beat up those little punks. Have the marks to prove it.” He lifted up his sleeves to reveal cuts and bruises, as if he was in a struggle.
“Son, just put the knife down,” said the officer. Liu held up the knife and dropped it to the ground. He put his hands up and walked over to the cops.
“No, Liu, it was me! I did it!” Jeff had tears running down his face.
“Huh, poor bro. Trying to take the blame for what I did. Well, take me away.” The police led Liu out to the patrol car.
“Liu, tell them it was me! Tell them! I was the one who beat up those kids!” Jeff’s mother put her hands on his shoulders.
“Jeff please, you don’t have to lie. We know it’s Liu, you can stop.” Jeff watched helplessly as the cop car speeds off with Liu inside. A few minutes later Jeff’s dad pulled into the driveway, seeing Jeff’s face and knowing something was wrong.
“Son, son what is it?” Jeff couldn’t answer. His vocal cords were strained from crying. Instead, Jeff’s mother walked his father inside to break the bad news to him as Jeff wept in the driveway. After an hour or so Jeff walked back into the house, seeing that his parents were both shocked, sad, and disappointed. He couldn’t look at them. He couldn’t see how they thought of Liu when it was his fault. He just went to sleep, trying to get the whole thing off his mind. Two days went by, with no word from Liu at JDC. No friends to hang out with. Nothing but sadness and guilt. That is until Saturday, when Jeff is woken up by his mother, with a happy, sunshiny face.
“Jeff, it’s the day,” she said as she opened up the curtains and let light flood into his room.
“What? What’s today?” asked Jeff as he stirs awake.
“Why, it’s Billy’s party.” He was now fully awake.
“Mom, you’re joking, right? You don’t expect me to go to some kid’s party after…” There was a long pause.
“Jeff, we both know what happened. I think this party could be the thing that brightens up the past days. Now, get dressed.” Jeff’s mother walked out of the room and downstairs to get ready herself. He fought himself to get up. He picked out a random shirt and pair of jeans and walked downstairs. He saw his mother and father all dressed up; his mother in a dress and his father in a suit. He thought, why they would ever wear such fancy clothes to a kid’s party?
“Son, is that all your going to wear?” said Jeff’s mom.
“Better than wearing too much,” he said. His mother pushed down the feeling to yell at him and hid it with a smile.
“Now Jeff, we may be over-dressed, but this is how you go if you want to make an impression.” said his father. Jeff grunted and went back up to his room.
“I don’t have any fancy clothes!” he yelled downstairs.
“Just pick out something.” called his mother. He looked around in his closet for what he would call fancy. He found a pair of black dress pants he had for special occasions and an undershirt. He couldn’t find a shirt to go with it though. He looked around and found only striped and patterned shirts. None of which go with dress pants. Finally, he found a white hoodie and put it on.
“You’re wearing that?” they both said. His mother looked at her watch. “Oh, no time to change. Let’s just go.” She said as she herded Jeff and his father out the door. They crossed the street over to Barbara and Billy’s house. They knocked on the door and at it appeared that Barbara, just like his parents, way over-dressed. As they walked inside all Jeff could see were adults, no kids.
“The kids are out in the yard. Jeff, how about you go and meet some of them?” said Barbara.
Jeff walked outside to a yard full of kids. They were running around in weird cowboy costumes and shooting each other with plastic guns. He might as well be standing in a Toys R Us. Suddenly a kid came up to him and handed him a toy gun and hat.
“Hey. Wanna pway?” he said.
“Ah, no kid. I’m way too old for this stuff.” The kid looked at him with that weird puppy-dog face.
“Pwease?” said the kid. “Fine,” said Jeff. He put on the hat and started to pretend shoot at the kids. At first, he thought it was totally ridiculous, but then he started to actually have fun. It might not have been super cool, but it was the first time he had done something that took his mind off of Liu. So he played with the kids for a while, until he heard a noise. A weird rolling noise. Then it hit him. Randy, Troy, and Keith all jumped over the fence on their skateboards. Jeff dropped the fake gun and ripped off the hat. Randy looked at Jeff with a burning hatred.
“Hello, Jeff, is it?” he said. “We have some unfinished business.” Jeff saw his bruised nose.” I think we’re even. I beat the crap out of you, and you get my brother sent to JDC.”
Randy got an angry look in his eyes. “Oh no, I don’t go for even, I go for winning. You may have kicked our asses that one day, but not today.” As he said that Randy rushed at Jeff. They both fell to the ground. Randy punched Jeff in the nose, and Jeff grabbed him by the ears and head-butted him. Jeff pushed Randy off of him and both rose to their feet. Kids were screaming and parents were running out of the house. Troy and Keith both pulled guns out of their pockets.
“No one interrupts or guts will fly!” they said. Randy pulled a knife on Jeff and stabbed it into his shoulder.
Jeff screamed and fell to his knees. Randy started kicking him in the face. After three kicks Jeff grabs his foot and twists it, causing Randy to fall to the ground. Jeff stood up and walked towards the back door. Troy grabbed him.
“Need some help?” He picks Jeff up by the back of the collar and throws him through the patio door. As Jeff tries to stand he is kicked down to the ground. Randy repeatedly starts kicking Jeff, until he starts to cough up blood.
“Come on Jeff, fight me!” He picks Jeff up and throws him into the kitchen. Randy sees a bottle of vodka on the counter and smashes the glass over Jeff’s head.
“Fight!” He throws Jeff back into the living room.
“Come on Jeff, look at me!” Jeff glances up, his face riddled with blood. “I was the one who got your brother sent to JDC! And now you’re just gonna sit here and let him rot in there for a whole year! You should be ashamed!” Jeff starts to get up.
“Oh, finally! you stand and fight!” Jeff is now to his feet, blood and vodka on his face. Once again he gets that strange feeling, the one in which he hasn’t felt for a while. “Finally. He’s up!” says Randy as he runs at Jeff. That’s when it happens. Something inside Jeff snaps. His psyche is destroyed, all rational thinking is gone, all he can do is kill. He grabs Randy and pile drives him to the ground. He gets on top of him and punches him straight in the heart. The punch causes Randy’s heart to stop. As Randy gasps for breath. Jeff hammers down on him. Punch after punch, blood gushes from Randy’s body, until he takes one final breath, and dies.
Everyone is looking at Jeff now. The parents, the crying kids, even Troy and Keith. Although they easily break from their gaze and point their guns at Jeff. Jeff sees the guns trained on him and runs for the stairs. As he runs Troy and Keith let out fire on him, each shot missing. Jeff runs up the stairs. He hears Troy and Keith follow up behind. As they let out their final rounds of bullets Jeff ducks into the bathroom. He grabs the towel rack and rips it off the wall. Troy and Keith race in, knives ready.
Troy swings his knife at Jeff, who backs away and bangs the towel rack into Troy’s face. Troy goes down hard and now all that’s left is Keith. He is more agile than Troy though, and ducks when Jeff swings the towel rack. He dropped the knife and grabbed Jeff by the neck. He pushed him into the wall. A thing of bleach fell down on top of him from the top shelf. It burnt both of them and they both started to scream. Jeff wiped his eyes as best as he could. He pulled back the towel rack and swung it straight into Keith’s head. As he lay there, bleeding to death, he let out an ominous smile.
“What’s so funny?” asked Jeff. Keith pulled out a lighter and switched it on. “What’s funny,” he said, “Is that you’re covered in bleach and alcohol.” Jeff’s eyes widened as Keith threw the lighter at him. As soon as the flame made contact with him, the flames ignited the alcohol in the vodka. While the alcohol burned him, the bleach bleached his skin. Jeff let out a terrible screech as he caught on fire. He tried to roll out the fire but it was no use, the alcohol had made him a walking inferno. He ran down the hall and fell down the stairs. Everybody started screaming as they saw Jeff, now a man on fire, drop to the ground, nearly dead. The last thing Jeff saw was his mother and the other parents trying to extinguish the flame. That’s when he passed out.
When Jeff woke he had a cast wrapped around his face. He couldn’t see anything, but he felt a cast on his shoulder, and stitches all over his body. He tried to stand up, but he realized that there was some tube in his arm, and when he tried to get up it fell out, and a nurse rushed in.
“I don’t think you can get out of bed just yet,” she said as she put him back in his bed and re-inserted the tube. Jeff sat there, with no vision, no idea of what his surroundings were. Finally, after hours, he heard his mother.
“Honey, are you okay?” she asked. Jeff couldn’t answer though, his face was covered, and he was unable to speak. “Oh honey, I have great news. After all the witnesses told the police that Randy confessed of trying to attack you, they decided to let Liu go.” This made Jeff almost bolt up, stopping halfway, remembering the tube coming out of his arm. “He’ll be out by tomorrow, and then you two will be able to be together again.”
Jeff’s mother hugs Jeff and says her goodbyes. The next couple of weeks were those where Jeff was visited by his family. Then came the day where his bandages were to be removed. His family members were all there to see it, what he would look like. As the doctors unwrapped the bandages from Jeff’s face everyone was on the edge of their seats. They waited until the last bandage holding the cover over his face was almost removed.
“Let’s hope for the best,” said the doctor. He quickly pulls the cloth; letting the rest fall from Jeff’s face.
Jeff’s mother screams at the sight of his face. Liu and Jeff’s dad stare awe-struck at his face.
“What? What happened to my face?” Jeff said. He rushed out of bed and ran to the bathroom. He looked in the mirror and saw the cause of the distress. His face. It…it’s horrible. His lips were burnt to a deep shade of red. His face was turned into a pure white color, and his hair singed from brown to black. He slowly put his hand to his face. It had a sort of leathery feel to it now. He looked back at his family then back at the mirror.
“Jeff,” said Liu, “It’s not that bad….”
“Not that bad?” said Jeff,” It’s perfect!” His family was equally surprised. Jeff started laughing uncontrollably His parents noticed that his left eye and hand were twitching.
“Uh… Jeff, are you okay?”
“Okay? I’ve never felt more happy! Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, haaaaaa, look at me! This face goes perfectly with me!” He couldn’t stop laughing. He stroked his face feeling it. Looking at it in the mirror. What caused this? Well, you may recall that when Jeff was fighting Randy something in his mind, his sanity, snapped. Now he was left as a crazy killing machine, that is, his parents didn’t know.
“Doctor,” said Jeff’s mom, “Is my son… alright, you know. In the head?”
“Oh yes, this behavior is typical for patients that have taken very large amounts of pain killers. If his behavior doesn’t change in a few weeks, bring him back here, and we’ll give him a psychological test.”
“Oh, thank you, doctor.” Jeff’s mother went over to Jeff. “Jeff, sweetie, it’s time to go.”
Jeff looks away from the mirror, his face still formed into a crazy smile. “Kay mommy, ha, ha, haaaaaaaaaaaa!” his mother took him by the shoulder and took him to get his clothes.
“This is what came in,” said the lady at the desk. Jeff’s mom looked down to see the black dress pants and white hoodie her son wore. Now they were clean of blood and now stitched together. Jeff’s mother led him to his room and made him put his clothes on. Then they left, not knowing that this was their final day of life.
Later that night, Jeff’s mother woke to a sound coming from the bathroom. It sounded as if someone was crying. She slowly walked over to see what it was. When she looked into the bathroom she saw a horrendous sight. Jeff had taken a knife and carved a smile into his cheeks.
“Jeff, what are you doing?” asked his mother.
Jeff looked over to his mother. “I couldn’t keep smiling, mommy. It hurt after a while. Now I can smile forever.” Jeff’s mother noticed his eyes, ringed in black.
“Jeff, your eyes!” His eyes were seemingly never closing.
“I couldn’t see my face. I got tired and my eyes started to close. I burned out the eyelids so I could forever see myself; my new face.” Jeff’s mother slowly started to back away, seeing that her son was going insane. “What’s wrong mommy? Aren’t I beautiful?
“Yes son,” she said, “Yes you are. L-let me go get daddy, so he can see your face.” She ran into the room and shook Jeff’s dad from his sleep. “Honey, get the gun we…..” She stopped as she saw Jeff in the doorway, holding a knife.
“Mommy, you lied.” That’s the last thing they hear as Jeff rushes them with the knife, gutting both of them.
His brother Liu woke up, startled by some noise. He didn’t hear anything else, so he just shut his eyes and tried to go back to sleep. As he was on the border of slumber, he got the strangest feeling that someone was watching him. He looked up before Jeff’s hand covered his mouth. He slowly raised the knife ready to plunge it into Liu. Liu thrashed here and there trying to escape Jeff’s grip.
“Shhhhhhh,” Jeff said. “Just go to sleep.”
Remember to check out the Jeff The Killer Reboot of this creepypasta classic.
Dark Images and Darker Stories
Whilst the above explains the backstory of the Creepypasta tale itself, the question remains, where did the image come from in the first place? Here is where fact and fiction begin to blur with even the photograph’s origins being obscured by half-truths and myth.
For some time it was believed the photograph was a photoshop manipulated image of a girl identified as Katy Robinson. The story went that this young girl, who was considered by some internet trolls to be overweight, was eventually driven to suicide by online bullies. Her image was then photoshopped and used as the basis for the most widely known Jeff the Killer image.
It’s a tragic story which though it exists entirely separately from the Jeff the Killer Creepypasta lends Jeff’s image of the bleach-skinned wide-eyed smiler, an even more sinister aspect and a legitimate reason to find the image unnerving, depicting as it did not only a deceased girl, but a victim of the same species of bullying that the fictional character endures. Unfortunately, this story also turns out to be nonsense.
The Katy Robinson story and the entire idea that the Jeff the Killer image used the photograph of a deceased girl as its basis has been debunked. The girl featured in the photograph alleged to belong to the unfortunate Ms Robinson is actually a girl named Heather White, who has confirmed that the images alleged to have been manipulated have nothing to do with the famous image of Jeff the Killer.
Another theory that has gained traction in recent years is that the original photograph was of an unnamed stickam girl. This girl, who is alleged to have been crying for attention, was said to have used images in which the flash from the camera or monitor illuminated and overexposed her face giving it the bleached-out white appearance familiar from the Jeff Killer images.
Her image was subsequently screenshotted and adopted by another anonymous user who then posed as her using her photograph to ask “Am I pretty?”
Responding to what seemed to be a naked self-promotion or hunting for sympathy clicks, viewers of the image gradually added to a thread in which they manipulated the image so that it gradually became more and more distorted. These photoshopped images are believed by some to have evolved into the original Jeff the Killer photographs. Well, that’s one theory at least and currently, the one that seems to be given the most credence.
Other theories as to the image’s origin are that the root image is in fact simply a manipulated photograph of Jeff The Killer’s original poster Susseur wearing a latex mask. This is actually what he claimed, though the fact that the image has been identified in videos and other sources a number of years before he posted his story makes this claim seem somewhat unreliable.
As is the theory that the image is a manipulation of the ‘overly attached girlfriend’ meme because of the similarly wide-eyed and smiling pose. This theory can be debunked almost immediately owing to the fact that the meme in question (based on an image of Laina Morris) features an image from 2012, meaning that it came into existence long after the earliest known version of the Jeff image and indeed the original Jeff the Killer story.
So far the farthest back anyone has been able to trace the image is to a Japanese site called pya.cc where two versions of the image were found, both faces are noseless, though one has added contour shading around the eyes, and the area where the nose would be. It has also been noted that the two images have different eye shapes, with one looking more like the eyes of a stuffed toy or cartoon character.
Other Possible Jeff The Killer Influences.
Though they seem to be less widely acknowledged a number of other pop culture characters have clearly influenced the evolution of Jeff the Killer
Most prominent amongst these is the DC villain and Batman arch nemesis The Joker. Not only does this character share the clown-like combination of a white face and maniacal smile, but in Tim Burton’s version (as played by Jack Nicholson) his face is disfigured by an accident with chemicals, a trope which is also present in various versions of the Jeff the Killer story.
In Christopher Nolan’s version meanwhile, the noticeably scarred Joker (played by Heath Ledger) is thought to have deliberately mutilated his own face in order to create the fixed grin, telling various conflicting stories throughout the film as to how he was scarred in the first place. Again this is a trope employed in the Jeff the Killer stories.
Both The Joker and Jeff The Killer can trace their origins further back to the early black-and-white classic The Man Who Laughed in which the tragic hero has a fixed maniacal smile throughout.
Even less discussed is the obvious influence of the Japanese manga (and later movie) character Ichi the Killer who not only shares virtually the same name as Jeff but has a fondness for knives and homicide and also sports a badly scarred mouth twisted into a permanent smile.
Why is Jeff The Killer So Popular?
Credit for the Jeff the Killer character: Sesseur (DeviantArt)
Publisher’s Note: According to the character’s original creator, Sesseur, he is not the author of the tale featured here, and claims this popular version of the Jeff The Killer story is “fan-fiction” written by a follower of his earlier work, which has since been lost. For the original story of Jeffrey Hodek, per the vision of the character’s original creator, you can visit Sesseur’s DeviantArt post here.
Remember to check out the Jeff The Killer Reboot of this creepypasta classic.
More classic Creepypasta stories can be found here:
Slender Man
Ben Drowned
Jeff The Killer vs Slenderman
Jeff the Killer: quick facts
- First appeared online in 2008, on YouTube and Newgrounds, and was retold and rewritten many times as it spread across creepypasta sites.
- His trademark line, “Go to sleep,” is one of the most quoted lines in internet horror.
- The famous Jeff the Killer picture is a heavily edited photo. Its original source has never been confirmed.
- A modern retelling, Jeff the Killer (Reboot), expands his backstory.
Jeff the Killer FAQ
Is Jeff the Killer real?
No. Jeff the Killer is a fictional character from an internet horror story. There is no real killer behind the legend.
What is Jeff the Killer’s backstory?
In the original story, Jeff Woods is a teenager who moves to a new town with his family. After a fight with local bullies he is doused in bleach and alcohol and set on fire. Badly disfigured, he carves a smile into his face, burns away his eyelids and kills his family, whispering “Go to sleep.”
Who is Liu in Jeff the Killer?
Liu is Jeff’s younger brother. In the original story he is sent away after taking the blame for Jeff’s fight, and later versions and fan stories build him into a character of his own.
Who created Jeff the Killer?
No single author is credited. The character first appeared online in 2008 on YouTube and Newgrounds, and the story was rewritten by different people as it spread.
What does Jeff the Killer say?
His best-known line is “Go to sleep,” which he whispers to his victims.
Is the Jeff the Killer picture real?
The image is a heavily edited photograph. Many theories about who is in the original photo have circulated, but none has been proven.
How old is Jeff the Killer?
Jeff is thirteen years old at the start of the original story, when his family moves to a new neighbourhood. Later fan stories and art often show him as an older teenager.
Is Jeff the Killer dead?
No. The original story ends with Jeff alive and on the loose, which is why so many sequels, rewrites and fan stories carry his story on.
What should I read after Jeff the Killer?
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The pasta is quite a classic, indeed. Yes, I have seen the comments about this pasta. Yes, I know the things that are wrong with the pasta.
In my opinion, I think it’s good. It’s just like my cup of tea, only a little colder.
jeff:go to sleep
me:ok i wasnt planning to,but OK.
Jeff: GO TO SLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP Me: Oh My God Dude, Could You Really Fix Your Freakin’ Face? Jeff: Why Not? My Face Is Fine! Me: O-O-Okay… This Is Really Getting Creepy Jeff: Alright Nosna, IT’S TIME FOR YOU TO GO TO SLEEEEEEEP Me: OH MY GOOOOD NOOOO NOOO NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! Jeff: What’s Wrong? Scared? Hahahaha!!! Me: OHHH GOD NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! -duh duh duh- *Jeff stabs me in the back*
alsome from your friend elizabeth
Try harder next time.
Your name though…I can’t get over it.
I am the first commenter.
A story can be plausible, yet still fantastic. For example, it can contain paranormal characters and events without us poking holes in it. If the story’s actual premise is in a world that deals with unknown, that’s fine. It’s just in a world where that stuff occurs.
BUT, that doesn’t mean you can make things implausible left and right. It has to work together.
It’s not like I’m going to poke holes in Harry Potter, or the Avengers (weird examples), or whatever the hell else, simply because they have magic or superheroes. I WILL pick on it if there’s a stupid way of speaking and the characters have over the top personalities (such as the extremely violent kids), or fucking hopping over the fence to kill someone in front of a whole party where the parents don’t even try to save their son. Big difference.
Look at that Campus Tour story. Do I believe it? Do I think the TV can turn on without being plugged in? Or that the guy on the bed disappeared? No, absolutely not. But those types of unrealistic details are okay. That story worked. It wasn’t particularly scary, but it fit nicely.
And how you can simultaneously admit that I ruined the story for you, but defend it and say it doesn’t have to be real at the same time? If you believe that, it shouldn’t have ruined it for you.
The author being so ridiculous with the plot does ruin it formost people though. Look at all my thumbs up. Most commenters said something similar to me.
Not only that but in order to have the feeling of being watched, you must be looking at them because the iris reacts to human contact. Not sure on the whole thing but Vsauce did a video about it.
Not only that but in order to have the feeling of being watched, you must be looking at them because the iris reacts to human contact. Not sure on the whole thing but Vsauce did a video about it.
Why did you…nevermind.
I’m 13 and I talk that way. Then again, I’m much smarter than most of the people I know…
Your probably a 30 year old fat guy who lives in your parents basement.
oMG that is so funny dang that is mean
Probably true. Hehe…. Since when is a thirteen year old smart? xD
Most of these comments killed my brain cells.
same :/ i thought it was a good story tbh but people are like ‘oh knife crime is bad!’ and stuff 0.0 am just like woo!! loved it! :D haha! i don’t see why every one was making such a big fuss?! it’s just a story am guaranteeing it’s probably not based on reality
we should have expected it, this being the source of ALOT of author dumb-fuckery.
seriously, too many JtK ripoff pastas are coming in, crappypasta is proof.
The raw idea is there & the picture at the end was a nice touch, but in terms of the english, there is definitely something to work on. I see no need to elaborate on this point as it has already been mentioned in several comments above. This is definitely a good ‘first draft’, don’t be so negative and take the comments as constructive criticism.
If you work on it I’m sure it’ll truly be worthy of being called ‘Famously Creepy’
I hear you.
It’s difficult to take being called a fucktard and terrible writer, and essentially being called a pile of dog shit as constructive criticism. Some are constructive criticism, and try to be respectful. Still people are forgetting this writer was HUMAN, they aren’t perfect and they deserve a lot of respect and at least for someone to tell them they did well (I know lots of people are positive). But I know if I wanted to see what people thought all I would see were all these comments on how awful it was. It did have some errors, but this is all amateur writing, don’t expect perfection. This person has feelings and no one is perfect. Can anyone honestly tell me they’ve never made an error in their entire lives? If you respond with yes I am calling your bullshit now. So come on guys, be nice at least give them props for having the courage to submit it despite its flaws. Seriously.
True that! you’re so right
I don’t know, it just depends on your perspective doesn’t it? I would take the criticism as constructive, and try to make my work better, but that’s just me…
i love jeff the killer but i hate that pic
The fighting scene was TOO much. It’s great that you wanted to explain everything, but the motion switches too much to try to explain everything. Also, bleach doesn’t burn when it touches you. It won’t whiten your skin either, unless you leave it there for a LONG time. You don’t switch on a lighter either. When your hair burns, it doesn’t change colour, it comes off. Also, who was telling the story? Change the point of view to something consistent, it began as a newscast, but continued the story as what? A anchorman following the kids? If so, why didn’t he help when the kids were being jumped? Too many inaccuracies in the story, but good idea. 4/10.
(COUGH COUGH) You suck..(COUGH COUGH)
although you hate it, i love how you point out EVERY DETAIL!, also bleach does burn when touched by fire most of the time, (COUGH) JUSTA BTW.
I would have joined in the fight and true at least one of the adults could have helped.
HEY! leave him alone man and worry about yourself…stalker…
Bleach doesn’t burn. It’s 80% water.
And he pointed out EVERY detail? If that was every detail, then Jeff the Killer would be labelled as mediocre in my book. But alas, that is only about 4% of all the bad parts.
Dude, his face was also covered in vodka, plus, he switched the lighter on and put it on his face.
Did you even read the story?
The only ting actually good about this is the picture at the end. It gives me chills super hard. The story though….uhm…needs work…to say the least.
To the people like the first commenter, that think the story was too ‘unbelievable’: it’s a CREEPYPASTA. They won’t all be realistic, they won’t all feel like they actually happened, and you aren’t going to like them all. How would you like it if I took your favorite book, or movie, or whatever, looked at it, then poked a GIANT plot hole through the middle that made you see the story differently? Because now I can’t look at Jeff the Killer, one of my favorites, without seeing all these minor details that just seem… off. So thanks.
If you din’t like the story, or noticed something wrong with it, don’t make such a big deal out of it. It’s fine that you don’t like it, but instead of ruining the story for the people that DO like it, go read something else. And if you don’t like that story, read something else. That’s why there are so many stories on here: so everyone can have a favorite. And honestly, all these people that are calling it ‘unorganized shit’, go ahead and write something better, get it published on the site, and MAYBE I’ll think twice. Even if you do get it up, chances are there WILL be mistakes, there WILL be plot holes, and there WILL be an army of trolls just like you waiting to make fun of you for it.
Well. Now that I’m done ranting, I love this story. It is and always has been one of my favorites, one of the ones suitable to read at night, with the lights off, just before you go to bed, to give you that one last scare. Bravo, 10/10.
NONE of it makes sense though. That’s the problem. Even the bad pasta’s work in the world there set in. In this, nothing feels natural. Kids dont act like kids, people don’t talk like people, physically impossible things happen with no explanation (super natural or otherwise) and it just doesnt make sense. It’s bad, there’s nothing classic, or good, or redeeming about it.
This crap is garbage and who ever wrote this must be a 4 year old.this is the most unplanned unorganized price of turd I have ever laid my eyes on.im angry this is in the famously creepy section because the only thing creepy is how someone could write such a monstrous peice of dog shit.
Coming from the person who wrote 6 sentences worth of writing and managed to do it in 3 run on sentences…
And for got to use capitals, I look forward to the time when people stop hating uppercase letters, I mean what have they ever done to you.
Whoever wrote this comment must be an 11-year-old wanna-be troll who can’t spell. (-)_(-)
HEY! YOU CALLIN 11 YEAR OLDS STUPID!? I’M 11! And I spell perfectly so F*** OFF!
Oh my god who cares!
i do :P
Really? “Callin”? I don’t call that correct spelling
*Calling *Fuck
Screw you
Watch your language! >=C This was a great story on my opinion.
Look- just because YOU can’t write this good doesn’t mean you have to hate on other Pastas. I’d like to see you write one, get it PUBLISHED, and become a Creepypasta legend. Think about it, and go to sleep, Imbecile.~
What the Hell?
YOUR SO MEAN THIS WAS FANTASTIC!
respect the story
XD u keep thinking tht bud ;)
Then don’t read it.
Please, read this story. It’s pure literature. Why else would it be the TOP CREEPYPASTA (aside from slenderman)? Maybe if you actually read it you’d change your mind.
Wow. I can’t believe the stupidity of all of my haters.
“It was better when Jeff was an enigma?”
This story is the classic, and possibly the original! It’s NAMED after me, and there aren’t fifty thousand pastas out there with the exact name “Jeff the Killer.”
By the way, Creepypastas aren’t supposed to be realistic, obviously.
I swear, you people would complain about a fairy tale because it’s so unrealistic.
Anyway, still think this one is great… (although it’s not true)
GO TO SLEEP,
Jeff.
what ya gonna do,chop my hands of!? hahahahahahahahaahahah……whos that outside my window?
i agree jeffery haters make you famous
O my god shut up and stop calling your self that.
im not a hater……..im a fan…………………..
i would probably be the only person to ask for your autograph…..
you’re not the only one :3
GO GET EM JEFF!
Also btw, i’d be in line for his autograph, cause i know enough people like him to make a line, AM I RIGHT? if not thumbs down, but i don’t care, i’m standing up for what i like, and love, i’m part of the jeff army! Those who ain’t STOP POSTING WE DON’T LIKE YOU WE LIKE JEFF!
although it was depressing when jane came in..
-lesigh- shes pretty and all but ya’know.. don’t be hatin..
ikr…….
JEFF ARMY WILL TAKE OVER.
Everyone here’s an idiot.
Hope B.T.K. doesn’t time travel to the future and kill you.
*hugs your arm* I loved it Jeffy! ~<3 Its my favorite one on here!
*mumbles* unlike that tall mother f***** who lives in the forest…
^^
YOUR NOT BEAUTIFUL…
-June ~<3
Hi Jeffy *hugs* :3
Jane: -.- go fuck yourself
DONT SPEAK TO HIM THAT WAY BIATCH!
Jane: -.-*
Hi Jeff! I’m cosplaying as you next Otakon! ^u^
And also, for anyone who was confused about Liu, Jeff killed him BECAUSE he was his brother. Jeff cared about him a lot, so naturally he was killed first. It’s like an honor…or something.
Ill kill all of you fuckers GO TO SLEEP
I couldn’t sleep for two nights, also Oh :o
It may not be well written, and it may be poorly exicuted, but it is indeed a classic.
Can you really say something thats a year old is a classic? Sadly its popular.
This is in the famously creepy section… am I missing something?
Creepy in that “I wanna lobotomize myself after reading this” kinda way.
that was awesome :3
It was a pretty good story actually. I mean sure maybe it wasn’t realistic in “some” parts but other than that, I like the fighting and when he snapped and everything. The only thing I might say is that I kind of wished that there was an indication of where the article ended and the story began. :) And the picture’s not to bad but I love a picture at the end of a story.
I DONT!!!!!!!
I accuialy do not think this is fake accuialy I think this is an fantastic thing Ps go to [Edited – don’t post your home address on public websites, kids] that is where my owner Sierra is but don’t kill her only scare her a bit and tell her to go to sleep she wont DO NOT KILL HER I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU YOU BASTARD IF YOU FUCKING KILL HER!!!!!!!!!!! Anyways I just want you to scare her ONLY FUCKING SCARE HER!!!!!!!!!! If you fucking kill her i will cut your insides appart and MAKE THEM COME OUT YOUR MOUTH YOU ASS HOLE I WILL KILL YOU IF YOU KILL HER just Scare her and do what she wants..Ps…. I think you are awsome and I am typeing with paws….. o.e
You people are asshole. Thumbs downing me! Fuck yall too!!!!
You Know What? F YOU! YOUR A HATER!
“Do you want to know how I got these scars?”
acne?
HOW DID YOU KNOW???!!!
YEAH ITS A FUCKING DISTURBING PICTURE! NOSELESS, ROUND WHITELESS EYES STARING AT THE CAMERA FUCK CREEPY SMILE.
you are right this picture is DISTURBING VERY DISTURBING
The story coulda used some polishing and whatnot. Its not THAT bad….there’re much worse posted on here but it can use some improvements. By the way I’m too scared to glance at the pic….is it scary??
YES. YES IT IS.
its not scary its BEAUTIFUL HAHAHHAH
The first thing that caught my attention was the dialogue. Here’s what the boy started off with:
“I had a bad dream and I woke up in the middle of the night.”
Ok. Next:
“There, in the little ray of light, illuminating from between my curtains, were a pair of two eyes. These weren’t regular eyes; they were dark, ominous eyes.”
Uh, what? An average 13-year-old couldn’t write that for his end of the year essay. Either you thought you were writing the memoirs of an older person or you have absolutely no clue how people speak.
The last point I’m going to get to (because there’s so much more that I could) is the realism of the situation. The cop literally says ““Well kid, looks like a year in Juvy…” Whaaaaaat? It’s automatically decided that it’s either Jeff or his brother that’s guilty? No argument for self defense? Not even Miranda Rights? Please indicate in the first line of the story that this takes place in North Korea or some other fascist country, because that is absolutely ridiculous. This site is becoming a joke now.
I talk that way and I’m thirteen…
will everyone please shut the fuck up with there complaining… it’s a story, they talk that way to give most of the details you’d need to understand it. And they immediately say Jeff or Liuis guilty is because they need to make their point and get on with the story. Damn.
QUIT HATING
WE’RE TIRED OF PEOPLE POINTING OUT EVERY FUCKING DETAIL,
IT’S PEOPLE LIKE YOU THAT RUIN IMAGINATION AND HOPE,
YOU RUIN PEOPLE.
and the only reason it’s ‘becoming a joke now’ (WHICH IT IS NOT) is because pissy people prading on other people’s work.
thank you and have a horrable day you bitch.
truer words have never been spoken
Jeff the killer is one of my favorite creepypastas and I totally agree. I’m not saying this because its my favorite but because you guys are all ASSHOLES!! >:(
I go to school with judgemental people like you and get “that feeling” when I’m around them. So fuck off its fictional. Why would you just go on the computer and say “hey who am I going to piss off today?” And yes I go to school with those people too. I know the story could be a little rough around the edges and you can let it be known in a nicer way. Have a nice day!!
i agree
Frankly I think people I just getting worked up over construction criticism, because that’s what it is. It’s to help the author improve.
We point out every detail, because it’s every detail that is shit.
It was a dark night. Jordan sat down on his couch and turned on his T.V. As the screen flickered on, he noticed something out of the corner of his eye. It appeared to be a hooded man, wielding a knife, but as soon as he saw it thee thing disappeared. Cautiously, he stood up and looked out his window. He couldn’t see anything, except for the tree lying in his front yard.
Jordan returned to his spot on the couch. The
program on the television was about a killer who was known to be at large in the area. Suddenly, there was a loud crash coming from the garage. He warily stood up and walked to the door leading to his garage.
A boy with a black hoodie and a skinning knife faced Jordan. Jordan screamed and dashed to the living room. Jordan tripped over a magazine lying on the floor. The child pinned him and silently whispered “Go to sleep..”.
A crackling sound came from the kitchen. Startled, the two both looked. A portal spawned near the table, and out appeared a frail man wearing a black suit. Across his shoulder was a shotgun; engraved on it was “Pacemaker”. The peculiar figure casually reached for a cigarette from his suit pocket and lit it. “I’ve had enough of your shenanigans, Jeff. Your time’s come”.
The boy, supposedly named Jeff, leaped off of Jordan and pulled out his knife. “Try me, old man!”. As Jeff jumped towards him, the man lifted his shotgun and fired. Jeff was blown back several yards. Jeff slowly rose and snarled, “Ha! Your weapon can’t harm me!”. The man rolled his eyes and walked away. Jeff looked down and noticed something; his legs were disintegrating into small letters and rubbish. “As you can see, ol’ Pacemaker doesn’t use ordinary buckshot. It dissolves terrible stories like you into what they are: piles of nonsensical words and rubbish.”, explained the old man.
Jeff tried lunging at the man, but at no effect. “Who are you??! I will kill you and your family!” Jeff screamed. “Me? I thought it would be obvious by now”, said the man. “I’m Time Travelling Dad”. As he said this, Jeff’s body wore away, and eventually his head. Jordan stared at Time Travelling Dad as the portal opened back up. Before he left, the man said “Stay safe, kid.” Jordan tried to mouth the words he wanted to say, but couldn’t. Time Travelling Dad stepped into the portal and vanished.
Not bad, but not as funny as Yossarin’s Time Traveling Dad story or as high of quality. But not bad kid not bad at all.
The hating does need to stop! Disliking and making slight criticisms is fine. But NO NEED for the hating! The creator made a story they thought was good and I think they did a great job! So if you hate it that much, then just leave the page and leave the creator alone ok?
Lmao @ jumping over the fence. Ridiculous.
How did they even know he was there?
They could’ve followed him and jumped the gun when the time was right. Yes, I know this story needs a lil’ work, but still, it’s creative and it’s more realistic than most of the other Jeff The Killer pastas, if you think about it.
A little work? A LITTLE work? Let’s try… a complete fucking rewrite.
this is so fukinng scary but fucking awsome i love this but you should check out jeff the killer vs jane the killer and jeff if you read this i am a huge fan
lol i love ben d
I am a fan of the creepiness too!
“Hey, guys? Wanna go to a party armed with guns and knives and try to kill that Jeff guy?”
“Okay, but what about after the fight, won’t we get caught?”
“I dunno.”
Sadly, that is how smart jocks like these are.
You guys should hear the story about Jane the killer hers are sad and stupid
Terrible pasta, what a mess. Guess the authors only just learned the word ominous
Wow you guys are assholes. Jeez, the guy makes a story and you just completely trash it? Fuckers.
Look, this story needs some work, but I’m not going to say it was awful. For one thing, it keeps shifting from present tense to past. And the dialogue could have been better. Still, it was an original idea (something that I think these previous commenters would have a real hard time coming up with).
I’m not going to comment again or have an argument with a stranger about my opinion. Keep working on your writing.
I agree with you, the story’s good. Some room for improvement but it’d make a good film that’s for sure.
Yes, it would make an awesome movie. ^_^
Totally agree! It just needs a few touches here and there. But it is still a good story! :D Don’t be bashing on someone’s creativity.
Ugh, I hate this pasta. Not because it is scary, but because it is stupid. >.> Everyone worships this garbage like it’s so fucking scary. Tbh, it’s lame as hell and I’m tired of hearing about it. SHAME ON WHOEVER POSTED THIS CRAP.
WOW NOOB, id like to see you do anything better, this is one of the classic pastas, its scary, its interesting, just stop being a hater for no reaosn
It’s written like shit and it’s a year old. How is that a classic? Classics are dated, this is 1 year old. The godfathers a classic, it’s 50 years old, even if we shorten the timespan for the internet age, a year is still not enough for a classic.
It’s also pure garbage.
Um actually, the original JTK Creepypasta was posted well over 5 years ago, in 2008. Know your facts, dumbass.
Come on dude it aint that bad.I mean come on I know it sounds foolish but come on let his imagination run loose this is a site for creepy stories just let him be
I know right? I liked Jeff the killer and the story because how creative the person tried to make this. I understand if some people don’t like Jeff but there is no need to start an uproar about the grammar and lack of logic. Who says horror stories need to make any sense? While I admit there may have been fans that ruined the character somewhat, I still like this story since it was the first creepypasta I ever read and the character is awesome to me. And like Jake said, just let him be.
Well the person who posted this “crap” was Mr.Creepypasta. So shut your mouth about this story. If you hate it, DON’T SAY ANYTHING. People don’t want to hear your hateful shit about the story. And those of you who agreed to that comment, Fuck you.
First off Mr.creepypasta didn’t post this. If you would have looked it is sessur. Second I want to hear his hateful shit about the story. Third you are being a little hypocritical. I mean you said if you hate something don’t say something and you said you hate him and you said something so….. Finally do you want to fuck me or what I’m confused.
that is some creepy shit right there
I’m scared…
I’M SUCH A WUSS FOR A SLENDER! LOL
… dude jeff stop ur making it scarier
I shuld be a slender! Im pale white (i mean like PALE PALE white) i like have black hair and no face (litterly but dents were the eyes nose and mouth shuld be) and i allways wear a black dress and i make a noise when im around anyone that kills them…also i have these things that some out of my back that are black but i make people go into a black hole that kills them. If you don’t beleve me than f*** off cuz it is TRUE ITS TRUE!!!!!!!!!!!!! gotz it?
Finally, the classic has been added to this site!
I believe that it’s one of my victims’ finest works… in case you didn’t know, the original author went to sleep a few days after I read this for the first time.
GO TO SLEEP,
Jeff the Killer.
P.S. Some people have been asking, and yes, I do know Jeffrey Dahmer personally… or, at least, I knew him. He wasn’t fast enough to avoid capture, but I’ll never die! Sweet dreams.
I don’t think you’ll find me or anyone Jeff. I think it’s time for you to finally..Go..To..Sleep. Sweet Dreams.
P.s I’ll be waiting.
Jeff will never go to sleep. Why do you feel the need to piss people off by insulting them on purpose for no reason? I’m surprised you haven’t “gone to sleep” yet. I’m awaiting the day with a closet full of cake, balloons, and streamers. And Jeff I think your awesome no matter how weird my family thinks I am. :)
He is the author and he did make you up…Dumbass… Ps Pretty stupid of you to kill your brother and Whats with your emo hair it sucks. Have a nice day asshole :D
lol jk but really why did you got through all of that just to kill your brother and i mean just getting caught on fire doesnt make a good explination for you to go insane.
O.O BITCH
What is wrong with emo hair?
Everything is wrong with EMO hair e.e
you don’t go insane everyone is born insane its just that its deep inside of them and they just need to let it out like me im insane im able to control it though and he probably went into shock like the doctor said and that caused his full insanity to come out insanity is like an emotion its inside you and you can’t completely get rid of it
hey, jeff! just wonderin who would win between you and slendy!
slendy all the way…
JEFF
JEEEEEEEEFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!!!! >:O
well jeff cant die and slendy cant die so a tie
Well Jeff can die because he’s only human. He’s just good at NOT dying, while Slendy, on the other hand, is a (in my own nerdy class specification system) Class 2 Poltergeist. Therefore he cannot die, only be expelled from a household via some sort of ritual. So I would say Slendy.
Do not know properly slender man he sneaky but jeff can stab good no slender man because he can actually not die
Well that’s a rather stupid question.
First of all, neither of them are invulnerable to physical damage, (Neither of them is a ghost, demon, spirit, etc. All though you can’t be completely sure what Slendy is because the stories relating him vary. Let’s just say he exists in the form of flesh)
so that would mean that they could both be hurt.
Secondly, Jeff has an unusual set of fighting skills, meaning he could break bones and such quite easily, BUT, Slenderman is more of a “magical” entity, so he most likely has supernatural powers. He also has tentacles. He could rip Jeff apart in mere seconds.
That at least, is my opinion.
is*
Pix, I’m now your biggest fan. YOU’D WIN IN A BATTLE BETWEEN JEFF AND SLENDY.
Go to sleep…
I’ll be waiting
Maybe next time you’ll think twice be for coming to Illinois
scares of the past…
murder of your own blood…
mystery if you will ever get captured. Jeff, dont get too full of yourself.
You are now a ledend.
Be careful.
And Jane, stay out of Jeff’s way.
You may not get out alive.
~Black Ink
Rumors in my school are;
-Jeff is immune to the supernatural
-Jane IS supernatural, AKA Immortal
Fuck off Jane!! I’m sure there are plenty of kids who have had their parents taken away (no offense to those people it’s pretty sad) and I’m sure they’re just as devastated. But seriously, you let yourself become just more evil than your parents would have wanted. Is that how you want them to die knowing you? An evil little bitch that gets in everyone’s way?
Nice poem???? ( if it isn’t a poem I’m so sorry!!!!!)
Jane is not a psychopath she didn’t kill for pleasure and she died in her fight with Jeff…
Regarding your opinion on the “story” of how I became a serial killer, I have decided to rest the enigmas of this case. It is NOT fiction. It is the true story of how I became what I am today. If you had a single shred of sanity left (unlike me) you would have not wasted your time commenting about the errors and flaws of a true story told by me, backed up by the police, and confirmed by 5 intelligence agencies world-wide. A story as true as this is not to be taken lightly, mocked or ridiculed among the archives of creepypastas, as I understand you have intention of doing. Have you never felt that killer instinct like I have before? Have you never just wanted to KILL someone so badly that if it were put off for any longer your brain may explode? Now, I just have to kill. If I don’t kill someone twenty-four hours from my last murder, now I just lose what is left of my mind until I finally plunge my knife into them and laugh as they die. I am even out in the open world, hidden among the many people, my face kept hidden until such time as I kill again. In the last week I have claimed the lives of over 120 people, and try all had one thing in common. They tried to defend themself. My twenty-four hour kill period is nearing it’s end, so for now, see you in hell. I’m off to kill my next victim.
finally someone agrees.well i’m off
I can understand the psyco-family-killing. I can understand the loss of sanity. I can understand the killing other people at night. But how in the hell did you manage the flame retardant hair? Even more so with the bleach and alchol!
I really REALLY HATE MY FIRST NAME NOW!!!!!
Wooooooaaaaaaah scarry his face scared my soul out of me,I mean really his smilee……..0_0
And his eyes
Whats seen will never be unseen that picture will leave a huge scar in my memory
Wooooooaaaaaaah scarry his face scared my soul out of me,I mean really his smilee……..0_0
And his eyes
Whats seen will never be unseen that picture will leave a huge scar in my memory
OH NO, JANE! YOU WILL ABSOLUTLY STEAL ONE OF MY FRIEND’S LINE. IT IS TIME FOR YOU TO REST IN PEACE.
Your a very creepy man and thats why I’m out to get you Jeff…..
you cant go after people just because the are creepy. that is just wrong. to me Jeff’s look is totally cool.
~Black Ink
100% agreed. I support you dude.
I got to agree with you but really have you heard of Jane the killer she has to go after Jeff the killer
Jane, you know what? You can’t get Jeff because their is one more killer out to get you. And thats me. The reason why I’m out to get you is because when I heard that you almost killed Jeff, it got me mad. I’ve killed many people and they don’t call me Robert the Killer for nothing. I’m a mix of both you and Jeff. My lips are black like yours, but I cut a smile into my cheeks like Jeff, my hair goes down to my mid back like yours but its greasy and black and a little bit spiked up to the side like Jeff’s, my eyes are only black like yours but I burnt off my eyelids, leaving my eyes bordered in black like Jeff’s. If you want to kill Jeff you have to go through me first. Also, whats make me a killers is that I stab people in the heart, rip off their skin, dry their skin in the sun, then I eat the skin. So, yeah, your gonna get fucked up by a guy who’s sixteen, killed his mom and dad, and has two brothers(one also named Robert and my other brother Max). So you better get ready, I’m coming for you. But, in the meantime I think your cute, I’ll take my time with you before I kill you. See you in hell!
Okay, the whole “i eat people’s skin,” was far, like.. mighty fucking far, but anywho, yea Jane, piss off, Jeff is the best person in the world and you almost killed him, that was a jerky thing to do.
(if only i could meet jeff if he was real.. andd wouldn’t kill me.. but dreams kill.)
anywho, Jane
leave
jeff
ALONEEEEEEE
Robert seriously, If your trying to become a new mystery or trying to be cool or something? Because you fail at it.Eating people’s skin? Really? That’s slendy’s job. If you want to write your own creepypasta go ahead. But stop trying to be better than everyone else. >:( Sorry if I sound like a real bitch, I’m just in a bad mood right now. :(
Come into the forest… I dare you Robbert! let’s see if you make it out alive!
Ohhhh. Robert, get ready to deal with BEN and Majora’s Mask.
Hey Robert,
U r awesome for standing up for what u believe in!!!! I bet u would make a great motivational speaker!!! U would make a great rowl model one day!!! Good luck with what ever what u want to be!!!!
Sinserily,
Animal lover19
…Jane, I really like you, but if your out for my jiffy… well…
YOUR DEAD MOTHER F****! ^^ can I braid your hair now?
*smiles holding knife behind my back*
……… OH MY GOD. THE RUMOR IS TRUE.
for some reason i cried during the story……….and for some other reason i smile in a really creepy way when i look at jeff’s pic…….O.o
HEY JEFF HAVE YOU HEARD OF JANE THE KILLER!!!
:)
Hey baby where are you? I’m going to kill you anyways, so you might as well tell me……..
;) You remember the hotel? Yeah that was fun,But you fell asleep and I wanted you awake when I killed you not asleep and horny!
With Love, JANE THE KILLER
What….
Hey Jane, yeah… forget what I said… IM KILLING THAT B@STARD!
pffft,as if your really jeff.your probably just one of those peeps fakin to be jeff.i mean,really.but if you ARE jeff,then come visit me sometime,kay? :)
Screw you! You have no right to talk to Jane Everlasting like that! Now… come to the forest…
Hey Jeff! :D :D :D
If u really are him….. COME VISIT ME HERE IN MISSOURI!!!! Since ur a serial killer and all, I bet you can find my house… :D
Sincerely,
Ur #1 fan…. And a possible serial killer also
L.J <3
P.S, I think ur smile is sexy. :D
i like the way you kill… Personnally,I choose to see the fear in their eyes while they are slowly and painfully die in their own BLOOD….. that makes me happy….hahahahah!
ps:im a gurl. (super not important detal so,forget it -_-‘)
bye and see you….maybe….
Wait..what???
Sweet dreams? Since when does Jeff say “sweet dreams” sound more like Jane when she kills him on the mine craft mod. O btw for those who haven’t herd Jeff the killer vs Jane the killer Jeff ends up dieing. ^_^ hope the last sentence helped all the babies out there sleep. ^_^ Hmm I could real go for some blood right now ^_^
You’re wrong. Jeff didn’t die. Jane did.Technically Jeff DID die but then he came back because he’s immortal.
Jeff? Can u plz tell slendy that i luv him? Hes my hero and i want to meet him. He can have me as his slave! Ill do anything to meet him in person! Ill giv him 20$, hugs, and ill give him ideas 4 his nxt victim! =3 plz? 4 mii? =3 oh! And ask him if he can use his deamon powers to make other people have deamon powers? That way we could team up together and rule the world with fear! Thnx! =3
how dare u i love jeff and u want him to tell slendy ur feelings!………oh well at least u dont love jeff
ok?
this “classic” caused one of the worst fangirl outbreaks that has ever existed! do you know the pain derpbutt, operator, craphunter, MYSELF, ect. have gone through trying to find a good story and running into some of this shit?
god damn it people! why wont you understand?!
JEFF
MUST
DIE
you are a disgusting abomination, and I will throw you into a volcano
Pretty sure there would be more of an investigation before Liu was brought to juvenile detention right off the bat.
Randy and his friends must have some sort of record seeing as how their tempers are so short anyway. Just saying.
I can’t believe you made the young boy at the beginning use words like illuminating, ominous, horrendous, and the lest goes on. No kid talks like that, especially a young one.
You had all your characters speak in ways that seemed unnatural. You either used formality (e.g., the parents calling Jeff “son”) or cliché phrases (e.g., “and that’s final”), and there were things of this nature I don’t feel like finding. It seemed forced, particularly the “son” part. It reminded me of being a little kid and playing pretend, and forcing the words to make it feel more real when it only does the exact opposite. Nobody talks like that. Or at least rarely.
The three bullies. Wow. You went so over-the-top with their personalities. I just don’t believe all three were such awful, violent kids and that all three were up for pulling out their knives on other people so readily. And to do it twice. In front of people.
And that’s another thing. You’re trying to convince us that none of the parents stopped the children fighting at the party? That’s retarded.
Still more, you had these four preteens (well, one’s 13 but still) fighting in this fantastic combat that even most adults wouldn’t engage in? Lol. That’s not believable at all. It’s not believable in general, but to make them so young makes it all the more dumb and all the less plausible.
The way he became crazy was so silly. And for him to kill his brother too, it made no sense. Psychopaths can care for a handful of people. And you made him care so much about his “bro,” only for him to kill the kid so soon.
I thought this feeling you kept making him have was whenever he felt annoyed with someone, and that you’d expand on that as the foundation for his mentality, rather than: four kids battle Matrix style, three killed, none of the numerous adults step in, and one goes crazy. Lolwut.
By the way, you could’ve just had his eyelids burn off. And his hair would not singe to another color; it’d burn off.
I could go on, but you get the hint.
Jeff being an enigma is creepier. If you were successful at executing this, it would’ve been fine though. However, you were not.
I absolutely agree but I still injoyed it. This inspired me to take all the criticism from theses comments and make a better version of this story. Its going to be a lot longer but Im hoping when its finished I can upload it and it’ll be better than the original. I’m also calling it just "Jeff" and Liu’s name is being changed to Louis. Lou for short. So I’m hoping for the best and I hope you guys are to.
I am finished ill try to upload it soon
OK
YT?
It’s called beware those who would do you harm
I did not read this Pasta bu the pic gave me goosebumps T-T
you should have read the pasta, why go to a creepypasta site and not read any of the creepypastas? that is dumb!!!
I only came for the comments, but the pic came in front of my face and scared the life out of me! :^(((( LOL!
Same XD i scared my cousin half to death with it??
It scared the living crap out of my sisout and when she saw the picture she said “Oh god now I’m going to have nightmares
hmmm… Its not scary at all. I envy such look and characteristics! Call me crazy all you want, I’m the only sane one in MY family.
It’s especially not scary considering it’s nothing more than a picture of someone with the brightness and saturation set to max due to a failed (guessing) first attempt at PhotoShop.
They didn’t even know the blur the removed features in the nose region. There’s smoothing tools and almost countless resources to pull off a blank face like that, and somehow this awful photo is the thing that’s been giving nightmares to kids on the internet for years?
I’ve see Kardashian photoshoots with more professional PhotoShop which provide a more horrifying image.
This just stupid.
Oh well.
We can’t all be 13 I guess.
I agree
That is dumb ?
Ur night I had nightmares
Who looks at the picture without reading the pasta? Like pshhh.
Jeff is so creepy and his story is creepy that even made me get scared at night. I was always not scared at night but this night is creepy. Jeff is my fav creepypasta but now he realky creeps me out in his story
Not to me he will always will be my favourite
He’s beautiful…..he’s just like me…..I did the same thing as him…..we..are..beautiful!!!!
My nose, it is gone, my hand, it is gone. I am beautiful. But my mommy can’t see that. Her eyes are gone. They look better on me anyways.
me 2
same
Lol!hahahahaha I find it funny
You seriously only came for the comments…
I know,the pic really got me
oh my goodness read the damn stories before posting its dumb
Submitted Jeff: Revisited…not on the site yet…hopefully soon?
This is by far one of the best storylines ive ever read
Really?I mean REALLY?By far one of the best!?Sit down and start reading then, because this ‘creepypasta’ is the worst I’ve ever read.It belongs to the crappypasta section.I only finished it because I kept expecting it to get more and more ridiculous, and it did.Okay, I got past the thing that there are 12 year olds who carry knives and mug people on the street in broad daylight IN THE FANCY PART OF TOWN.Also, why do they look like cartoon characters?A fat and a skinny goon and the boss…That is how I imagined bad guys until the age of 5…Then the next day police came.Sure, nobody witnessed the actual fight or anything, but them running away, that’s something that ‘witnesses’ remember.Okay, no problem.Jeff admits it, then comes Liu(WHAT KIND OF A NAME IS THAT!?) holding a knife, and the policemen PULL THEIR GUN ON A 12 YEAR OLD WITH A KNIFE.He’s not threatening anyone, but two adult policemen who actually have a strict protocol restricting them when and where to even TOUCH their pistols.Two officiers aiming a gun at a kid for no reason at all could put their badge down for a lifetime.Then comes the party and the fight.Remember the first one?Randy’s wrist snapped, the other guy stabbed in the arm?They magically healed.In like a week.No need to plaster a broken hand, you can hit people with it.Okay, so these twelwe year olds decided that they’ll murder somebody who beat them up.If you think that’s how the world works, then you watched way too many action movies(instead of reading books).12 year olds beat eachother up constantly but they don’t bring guns to some party with 50 people to murder another kid in front of a crowd of people.What 12 year old would have the guts to do that anyway!?Again, we’re in the fancy part of town.And this is where we have to go back to the beginning of the story..A kid wakes up in the middle of the night, finds a monster in his bedroom, the cliché story we all know.In the middle of the night they start fighting the ‘monster’, but they are interrupted by the police who were called by a neighbour.So you’re saying that a neighbour was watching over their house all night waiting for the chance to call the police?They arrive pretty fast too, since it would have been easy for Jeff(he’s supposed to have super fighting powers fueled by some dark thing in his brain but the writer ‘forgets’ to mentoin it) to finish them off after he stabbed the kid’s dad in the shoulder.So again, when there was supposed to be no witness at all, someone called the police in the middle of the night, but NOBODY called them when they were fighting at the party?Jeff’s face was burnt and he spent time in hospital.Even though he ‘turned into an inferno’ right after he regained conciousness he could sit up and so on.Actually it takes months to heal from that.Without therapy you can’t even raise your hands and even if you could it would hurt like a bitch…And don’t even get me started on the face and the hair..Burn victims don’t have any hair left…Miraculously, his clothes were sewn back together as well, even though they are supposed to be burnt(they throw those clothes away in reality but whatever).So we arrived at the ending, he went nuts, okay.But why did he kill his family?Just because you go insane you won’t try to murder the people you love.He wasn’t a particularly evil kid or anything, nothing indicated that at least(maybe inserting stories about Jeff torturing helpless animals or some shit, jesus..).And when his mother found out about his insanity she immediately wanted to kill him.How does that make any sense?I notice that someone from my family is crazy and I shoot him/her?!What kind of a MOTHER could do that?This whole story is a ridiculous pile of steaming garbage, it’s so horrible I don’t know how can anyone write something this bad.It’s clearly a ‘Hmm, I wanna write something cool so I’ll just throw in some bloody scenes, fake psychology and shit I saw in horror movies and then I’m done before I get bored with it’.Obviously written in one sit.Horrible, just horrible.And the reason I’m so upset is that this is actually a famous creepypasta.
dude SHUT THE FUCK UP!is this your story? no? didnt think so! just shut up read and enjoy if you dont enjoy give it a shitty rating also kids like that are possible they have terrible and abusive parents and ig you get stabbed in the arm you can still use it may hurt but still usable and i will agree some things are messed up and stupid but some of the things you said are also stupid and maybe if you actually read it the kid or kids with guns said if someone intervenes gut will fly maybe the parents didnt want their children and/or themselves to be harmed also when he goes insane it makes sense for him to kill his family because 1. maybe he doesnt hold them dear 2. she did kinda betray him wanting to shoot him. plus if my kid went insane and was cutting and burning his eyelids off and shit like that i wouldnt want to see what happens next like what happened in the story she died. now i could go on a bit more but i really dont care and have already typed more than i wanted to so you enjoy pondering your idiotic thoughts. also just remembered this one but anyway the neighbor calling the police is totally possible maybe he heard a disturbance and screaming because pretty sure the kids dad would scream if he had a knife in his shoulder and the kid screaming trying to get him off of him. try to think more before commenting stuff that is actually possible. P.S. i believe i won :D
problem is with Jeff is the fact there is no trauma to indicate parents did anything wrong or the brother, besides the bullying from the other kids, but physical trauma can cause mental disorders and psychological break downs. I have to agree with Alexander the story is not all there, I mean time to heal was way off and some facts and maybe instead of saying weeks maybe months to give time for wounds to heal and maybe making the kids older probably in teens like 15 to 17 of age, and being a fancy place to live can tell has no impact on how story develops. I mean Alexander is wrong in the area cause you live in a fancy neighbor hood does not mean you are going to have bully free zone. over all it was fun to read though and I personally thought it was creepy to a point but having that many errors also killed it for me. overall 8/10 cause the creepiness was good
Trust me, you did not won..
“Did not won.”
Can’t followed your comment.
Old ass comment, but I can only assume YOU’VE never been stabbed in the arm or anywhere else for that matter.
I took a piece of serrated sheet metal all the way to the bone in the knuckle of my right index finger, sliced through the tendon, and it was useless for MONTHS!
Even now, five years later, I can’t make a fist without that finger bending any further than a 45 degree angle.
Listen kid I would LOVEto see you write a crap your pants story
Not today…
Well, even though the story isn’t realistic in some ways, doesn’t change the fact that it’s still creepy. The reason why this creepypasta is so popular is because of Jeff’s character. At first he’s a fairly normal kid, but the way the story is written shows Jeff’s slow descent into madness.This creepypasta is also great because in the beginning he was pretty much a good person, it shows how even good people can become corrupted. I definitely wouldn’t say that it deserved to be considered a crappypasta but some of it sure could use a reality check.
do you know how long it takes to write a story. my story is short and it took me almost eight hours of revising and writing! I would like to see you write something and then have all of us comment on it. sound like a plan? I agree with slenderman (comment section)… -Onyx Genocide
-Onyx Genocide Thank you!
I could take eight hours to shit, but it’s still just shit.
I agree, but if this thing came at me sining the song ‘lamborghini’ I would shit myself.
-Matthew thank you!!!
Might take YOU eight hours to shit. The rest of us, not quite.
Oh boy this argument.
“WRITING IS HARD SO ALL STORIES CAN BE BAD!!! SCREW EFFORT!!”
that’s all I got from your comment.
writing a short story is nothing I have done yet I more of a poetry writer, so yea i would say even in a fictional story facts still have to be accurate, make the story even better, none the less it does not take away from the creepiness the story gave to me as a reader. Really well played out and exceptional on that part. When writing poetry it does take a lot of time to think and come up with something creative and enjoyable, so I say it is no easy task for anyone write a short story, I could imagine the work and effort it takes since it takes a good amount of time to write a really good poem.Still I would try to make sure facts are equally as good and accurate as the thought of creepiness was put into it, just my opinion though.
Some body sat down and wrote this creepypasta using their love for writing and creepypasta. All of you cridicts only care about making people feel like crap by hiding behind you computers and slamming people. All of you would make some pretty good creepypastacreepypasta characters because your rude and twisted. It was good. So what if the gramer was off, have you never watched anime. Most of them use that dialogue.
YGS 100, here I come.
The spelling and grammar in this place is atrocious.
Jeff the Killer is my favorite anime
Whoa no way what’s the anime’s name?!
I am positive that if you gave this to an English teacher they would just ball it up and throw it away. Sure some people are rude with the comments but, at the same time there are many great pointspoints on things that didn’t make since. And I consider that constructive criticism not random douchyness
Are you sure it was “effort”? I believe that the writer was SMART enough to put some effort in his story. If he actually is, well it proves my point!
Come on, you have to know that this is some seriously bad writing, right? I mean, if you have read literally any other literary piece to compare to this you’d realize just how bad this is. The plot is cliché and horribly executed, the characters are all one dimensional, and Jeff isn’t even creepy. I find it really strange and kind of offensive that this is one of the better known, if not the best known, creepypasta because honestly I’ve read better plot lines written in sharpie on bathroom stalls than this. Pure garbage if you ask me.
it’s not important how best, how cool names are, how lame, or how popular the story is. All that important is the creation of the story
Dude it is jus a lil story. Don’t get so worked up
you never know it could be it detroit
I think that your COMMENTARY IS LONGER THAN THE STORY AND BY THE WAY, I would LOVE to see you write a story! It is HARD. Even harder, writing a Horror story! So go along, write a story or get lost!
are you rlly slender man…..? and just askin cuz i also have a lot of repect for you
ugh, pasta fans are as bad as the fnaf community
I like pasta. Even when it is on spaghetti. And the FNAF community can get REALLY annoying at some points. I only like the famous creepypastas.
Just because writing is hard does not excuse a pile of shit for a story.
seriously, this person probably shat out this story in 2 minutes.
Dude!!! WTFH????? JUST SHUT UP!!!! THIS IS BY FAR THE BEST RE-WRITE OF JEFF THE KILLER THAT I’VE EVER READ!!! HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF YOU WROTE A STORY AND SOMEONE GAVE YOU THAT BAD A REVIEW?? YOU WOULD FEEL LIKE SHIT!!! SO JUST SHUT YOU TRAP AND LEAVE1!!
hey alexander if you do not like creepy pastas maybe you should not be on this site because you are just an odd man out when you are the only one whou doesm’t like jeff the killer.
Nah they aren’t the only ones who think this story is bullshit, badly written drivel. And just because I don’t like it, which is my opinion, does not mean I’m incapable of writing something decent myself. This story actually becoming popular just proves once again, the general public has really shitty taste in entertainment.
calm down. don’t get so worked up bro.
i mean, his comment has 91 votes and there’s another comment that has upwards of 100 votes, saying the exact same thing. So….. I wouldn’t exactly call Alexander the odd man out
I heard that all CreepyPasta’s (not all just most) were made by SlenderMan driven insane from the cycological aspect of his presence. However it went down I truly enjoyed the story. (2 and a half out of 5) hope this gets better.
Shhhhhhh, just go to sleep.
I’m going to sleep it’s like 12 am in India
BRAVO!!! I totally agree with you on this one.
What a load of GARBAGE. Seriously.
And to add to all that – the COPS are judge, jury and sentencing panel all in one?!?!?
This is CRAPPYPASTA.
you do have a very good point, but this story is for entertainment, not for thinking everything through. I mean there are certain stories are not to be thought about.
Amen! Because it had such high ratings I saved it I couldn’t wait to read it. I felt Like a child on Christmas eve, who on hearing bells runs runs down to see Santa and instead finds his Dad, on his knees fellating a Morris dancer.
its just a story just calm down mate.
You are too realistic… this is just a story to creep out people. If you weren’t so realistic about it and actually read it as if you were jeff, this story would of been pretty amazing. I understand, this is your opinion, but don’t always look on the negative side. Try to read it again and see how awesome this amazing creepypasta is! :D
This story was created to scare people as you seem to acknowledge. In order for it to scare people it NEEDS to feel realistic if otherwise then it feels fabricated, taking you out of the illusion making everything in the story fall flat on its face,
Jeff the Killer is my fav creepypasta no offence to anybody else who does not like him.
Honestly, who cares if it’s realistic or not, people want to read it cuz it’s interesting. And, honestly, what creepypasta is realistic, like really , do you know a single creepypasta that’s 100% realistic?
THAT”S WHAT I SAID!@!! THANK U
if your from chicago, the police will point their gun at 12 year old for holding a knife, gun, any weapons, or even fake weapons. This story isnt that bad its creative and probably made for 12 year olds to read. Just saying.
Hey dude it’s just a story and you wasted all of your energy and time on it and if you like it or not keep it to yourself there are 10,000 people who like it and if you want it to be so real why don’t you write a realistic story
i agree with you, Alexander
Why are you being so rude about it? I get that you want to give your opinion but you could go about it in a very different way. This is SUPPOSED to be constructive criticism.
Chill the fuck out, man. It’s a story. Most stories aren’t realistic. Little Red Riding Hood? Hansel & Gretel? Hell, even the BIBLE! So dont complain that this story isn’t realistic.
P.S.
Im an atheist. Don’t ramp up on me, I respect all religion. You should respect my religion, too.
Or lack of religion… Don’t get mad not being rude I’m atheist as well. But the author wants us to feel like we can relate and I just can’t relate to a lot of this stuff while reading it. I caught myself continuously saying that doesn’t happen that way. Especially everything after the fire. I am a firm believer in not bashing other people but even the author said he was rewritting the story to fix it so why not offer up what needs to be fixed
I really enjoyed this story, but you do have a point. And when I was reading your comment, I laughed my ass off. But other than the unexplained shit, I think it was pretty good. Could use some work but.. ( Okay, alot of work.. ) it was readable. Thank you Alexander for the smile and laugh of the day!
PS author, if u are reading this, I think u should make a whole new Jeff the killer story just like this one, but with more ( how do I put this..?) common sense and more explaining. Sorry if I made u feel bad. Have a wonderful day and maybe consider a new story ? Thank you bye!
See? guys. this is the example of how people should act on the internet. Thank you Angel Gosic. Guys, use this person as an example. Yall don’t have to be so god damn suborn.
Maybe Jeff is telling the story. To the readers knowledge there couldn’t have been any witnesses to Jeffs actions while in hiss own home. Thus who would know the story of Jeffs life before insanity but him?
So, this is a story. Meant for entertainment. What is wrong with you people??? Where is your story? Did you submit one? I thought it was a great story for a campfire setting. My kids love it! If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all. There is difference between constructive criticism and just mean for no reason.
I don’t understand why you are so angry and annoyed. Nobody didn’t say anything bad about YOU. You cannot judge people about the things they like. I ABSOLUTELY love this creepypasta and you have no right to underestimate me bc I love this creepypasta. Btw I am NOT 12-13 years old, I am 16. You don’t know the age of who wrote this so you cannot judge him/her. That’s all what I’m gonna say. Sorry for my language btw.
I love the part where the kid casually picks up a bottle and hits him with enough force to break it, and yet Jeff is all good.
Dude, give him a break. I’m sure they worked hard on this.
I totally second that!
You hot that right on the spot.. Man you could join CinemaSins.. You gave the exact comment that I wanted.. And yes.. The kids are too young to hold such weapons.. Kids fight.. That’s natural.. But making this into an action style while evading all those gunshots and end up in a bathroom and the kid somehow got everything in his pocket.. (A Knife, Gun, Lighter) This story is so weird that it is so famous on Creepypasta..
“Sshhhh… Just Go To Sleep”
ummmm….Yeah, Liu is older than Jeffrey. Jeff is the YOUNGEST SON. Meaning that Liu is at least 14 years old. But some of the story’s facts really don’t add up.
I could not agree with you more. This transcribes the very worst of every B-movie and leaves out the endearing campyness. 12 year old shaking down new kids at the bus stop? Bullies saying, “Tsk, tsk. We’ll have to do this the hard way.” Preteens involved in a shootout worthy of the OK Corral? Every adult calling Jeff “son”? Mom totally cool with her 14 yr old being hauled off to Juvy and when dad gets home he’s all, “Yeah. Sounds about right. Anybody hungry?” This is a horribly told, genre crossing, revenge story written by a teenager who was, sadly, bullied when he was younger and has gotten his virtual revenge by utilizing every low budget movie with Saw & The Matrix – like style fighting and gore. Even if you shed all the unnecessary verbage, edit out the bombastic stereotypes and tighten up the core of the storyline, it would MAYBE be subpar.
Haters like you gonna hate :)
You ripped this story apart and I applaud you. This was litterally the worst fucking thing I’ve read. Like ever. Seriously. I can’t. I stopped reading barely halfway in, just to read the comments looking for something like this that will give me the details but acknowledge how stupid this was. Great job person, whoever you are, great fucking job! :D
well you know this all took Maryland, the story is mostly true, You may this it’s ridiculous because of the way the kids were described but it’s fluff. Every story has it. It’s supposed to reader interested. Though that is your n and I have no right to judge, I’m simply stating my opinion along with yours.
this story is based of a real story so what you just said is useless and that what you just said is garbage and that (i say the word “that” and i make no sense at all i need to shut up) yo-couldn’t be stuffed finishing this comment. (bye)
how many stories have you read then?
I agree I liked the story a lot but a thirteen year old boy doesn’t call their mom “mommy”
He went psycho remember
I’m sixteen, neatly seventeen mind you, and I call my mom mommy momma mummy ma ECT. And he’s going insane, his inner child may be showing.
I’m seventeen and I call my mom mommy, momma, mummy, mama, ma, mum, ECT. And he’s going insane, his inner child may be showing.
I’m seventeen and I call my mom mommy, momma, mummy, mama, ma, mum, ECT.
He went insane, thats why he called her “mommy”
You must be referring to the author.
though they might if they are insane
I-I do…
-MYSTERY I think it’s because he was going insane, cause when he was normal he called his mom, mom.
This story was awesome and i loved it, and he went psycho those kind of people don’t control their mind and words…..why don’t you pay more attention to what is happening in the story instead of bashing it?
I loved it too
That’s right. I gotta agree with you on that one.
its nice to read about the man i choose to fight one day, so i know the truth behind his flaws and mistakes, for all those who don’t know me…My name is Cole…. I’m a 14 year old pre-teen girl who just wanted a normal life…including the killing and all but we all know the real story behind everyone’s mistakes…..
P.s- Stay awake, or die sleeping
Sincerely, Your beautiful-lest nightmare
YOU ARE CRAZY WOMAN!
I actually like this girls style
no shes perfect way better than jane oh i wish to fight her to one day man shes awesome!
um……ok
If your 14 then you are a TEENager and therefore not a Pre-teen girl. Jesus hula hopping Christ, have a think xx
I like your style
Uh…tl;dr. Sorry bro. Also, your English is shit. Read like, two words and was done. Fix it, then come back to your friendly neighborhood maniac and we’ll talk.
This is truly one of the most awfully written pastas I have read.
The story does have potential, but the execution is awful! Why does the tense keep changing mid-paragraph?!
I don’t know…
Hey, guys! What’s with all the monkey business?
Alexander, Id like to see you try to right a good pasta. You cant even put a space after a punctuation
I would like you to try to spell WRITE correctly. (: You can’t even use apostrophes or punctuation. How about you try to write one. c;
this story is still amazing the wording doesnt matter because if you really enjoy a story you can enjoy it no matter the wording
That isn’t true. Grammer is a huge part of the story. That is why we have ELA(English Language Arts) classes
Guess that you are pretty good at grammar since you wrote grammer instead of grammar.
Bennnnnnnnnnn help somebody anybody helppppppppppp
Huh?
then your not reading enough.
this is a horror was scared out of my mind my friend and I read it out loud in my room and after we read it we where scared o.o o.o
___ ___
Agreed
LIES. worst pasta other then sonic.exe.
I love this pasta how dare you ?
Heck yeah it is, I love this creepy pasta so freakin much
Me too
Hey… Does that mean that you’re the creator of Jeff the killer?? If so just email me on how you got the idea. [email protected]
I love jeff the killer
is it up yet?
I agree with you in some things, like he cliche and the personaitys if the bullies, but it’s not your story and if you don’t like it go write one if your own; a better one. And I honestly think you could write a better one.
no please… no more jeff… we have too many fanfictions and fangirls as it is, i can’t imagine how Derpbutt must feel dealing with all these uneducated morons swarming the site….
all because of you, because you had to make an empty shell, that ANYONE who thinks their life is bad can step in to, and make themselves a self-insert killer.
I want to know how you personally feel as a person knowing that now because of you we have to deal with girls that have sexual fantasies about some bleached up, burned alive, psychotic killer.
This story should have never been uploaded… it should have been written MUCH better, and that shell should have been sealed off with concrete made of good writing and details.
I’m now going to say “Fuck you”, not because you wrote this story or had the idea, but the fact you didn’t put forward the effort to make it somewhat logical, and the fact that you spawned one of the worst fandoms to try and deal with.
so now…
Fuck you.
I think this is a good idea. Here is a bit of advice from me;
•Add a touch of romance. Maybe the antagonist could find a girl/boy they like?
•Don’t be awkward with the wording. Please, just talk like you’re telling the story to another person.
•Little stories in between. Add tiny little random stories, that could all connect in the end. It’ll get your readers thinking!
•A lucky break? Save at least one character. Don’t try to kill them all. It’ll give you a good chance for a sequel.
It’s a creepypasta, not a romance short story.
Yeeeaaaaaahhhhh!!!!
so if yall wanna like not talk bull shit about jeff id love that, you don’t know his life because he’s never told anyone, the witnesess sure but you don’t know the story directly from him, don’t say you know he, i catigoize him as a loving kid that got stuck on the wrong path, and if you say otherwise to me, i hope you know i honestly don’t give 2 shits what you say cause this is fact and opinion, you wanna make kidy shit storys like this about him, sure this could have been related to what it was like but like i said you don’t know it from his own mouth, i feel him watch over me cause i am like him and i cherish his well being and when he watches over me, re think what you know before you put it out there, and don’t bitch at me saying that i know his life cause i don’t eather but i sure as hell know this ain’t it
English is another thing you don’t know.
I agree with Thomas on this one. Learn the English language before you try to ‘school’ a bunch of people. Another suggestion: Get your head examined. If you think fictional characters are ‘watching over you’, you’ve got serious mental problems.
I agree with the other two. Please try again in your primary language; I can always Google Translate it.
I really hope you’re trolling, but something’s telling me that you’re not..
This comment is a special kind of stupid.
I’ve been using the word ominous since I was six…
In the original story, Jeffs brothers name is Liu. I don’t just mean the one written here, but the actual original story (is it appropriate to call Jeff a modern legend?). However, when/if you write your story, it will be your story, so who am I to chsnge your characters names? Fire ahead.
NOOO. NOOOO. DON’T CHANGE LIU’S NAME. NOOOOOO. That ruins the story.
How?
This comment feels insulting to my intelligence.
I hope it is as good as this one was
Sweet! I like your idea. By the way, this story is still awesome. I think i’d also be awesome to see your new-and-improved story. It’ll probably be even more awesome!
Injoy?
i am sorry but as a writer i need to tell you. You spelt enjoyed wrong please spell it right
DAMN…0-o But i do have to agree with all of that i mean he went through all that ot help his brother just to kill him… I mean wtf and i also agree with the hair it would definatly burned off. Story 7.5/10 Your comment 10/10 :D
that was crazy im scared of his face now jeeze your discriptive.i was lost in his pic of his face i just stared at it frozen untill my friend changed the page.
im scared of it too but it gave me the oppisit affect i cant look at it for more than half a second and even with that im going to have nightmares :'(
Same here.jeez
This kid is a mad man
His face was so scary my sister burst into my room crying and she had to sleep in my bedroom
god damnit, is everyone here 5? that face isn’t scary at all! the only thing that would be scary is the fact that girls out there want to BANG that! (term: fangirls)
hahahahaha! i am insane ~Twin 1~ and i am the other half of Twin 1 *Twin 2* we r the new creepypasta’s but r not know by the others…
we r polar opposites but still get along. we both kill in different ways. I rip out their intestines and hang them with it ~Twin 1~, and I stab their eyes out and break their bones *Twin 2* we have not met Jeff, Slenderman, Ben, Sally and charlie, Bob, Masky and Hoodie, but we know who u r and its up 2 u if u want us P.S. I think Jeff would win against Slenderman ~Twin 1~ I think Slenderman would win against Jeff *Twin 2*
Imma write a pasta about that
My money’s on Santa kicking all of your arses
Got that right!
i think you should all stop talking sh@# about the story and just enjoy it. i mean, if you wrote a story and people b@#$%&ed about everything you did and all of the flaws you put in. wouldnt you be really sad that people cant just apreciate a horror story. i mean, come on people! thats just f@#$ed up.
If people don’t like a story, they’re entitled to say so and why they thought it was average/bad/horrible.
And let’s say I wrote a terrible story, because my first few would probably not be well-received. I won’t lie; I’d be a little hurt, but I’d also recognize that I could use the negative comments to make myself a better author. Frankly, I’d be more annoyed if someone just said “Wow, really great story. I loved it. Keep it up!” to avoid hurting my feelings. Empty praise isn’t worth shit.
I hate those “Gais if u dnt lyk d story dnt comment” messages, because you’re pretty much saying “This person typed words, so stop being mean to him. He should never have anything bad said to him.” or “Your opinion differs from mine so nobody wants to hear it.”
listen, NO ONE will take you seriously if you;
A.) tell people on a site where comments are for CONSTRUCTIVE CRTITSISM to not comment because they don’t like it.
B.)think this awful shit stain of a story is good.
aaand.
C.) censor yourself
Well, it’s better than sugarcoating something. I mean, if people sugarcoat your stories, they would be likely backstabbing you, and if you heard them, wouldn’t it be much more painful?
Appreciate horror… appreciate would be the correct spelling. Come back when you’re not a teenager and see if this still entertains, creeps you out, or terrifies you. This is just down right terrible.
Hey, a lot of the younger generation learn words like that, can’t really judge him on that part.
How do you not believe the bullies were not violent? Pulling guns on others isn’t violent? Seriously though.
The parents were probably keeping the little kids safe, plus, the other two bullies had guns, if they even attempted they would have been shot.
Not all psychopaths are like that, this is a killer with NO sanity whatsoever.
How does it not make sense to save his brother and not kill him later? Let’s see, as said, you have a killer with zero sanity, and his brother, Jeff wouldn’t care if it was his brother or not, HE IS AN INSANE KILLING MACHINE.
Sure the whole "getting a strange feeling when around someone who you hate" Is a bit silly, but hey, it’s fictional, anything can happen.
Having his eyelids burned off, in my opinion is too mainstream. The thought of him going insane and burning off his eyelids himself is a lot better.
Again, it’s fictional, anything can happen.
I give this story 10/10
Exactly. :)
The point is kids that age, especially that live in the richer part of town, wouldn’t be that violent or stupid. Sure kids are violent. But wanting to kill someone? With that easy access to guns? In front of adults? And they can hop fences on there bikes? Honestly this story has just so much stupid in it, there’s just nothing redeeming about it. It has to make sense within it’s own universe, which this story does not by far. Everything was just way to over the top to be even plausible for kids that age to do.
Remember, kids are humans. Humans of every age are capable of committing very horrendous acts of violence. Also, there were kids in my middle school back then who had drugs and one case of a knife at school.
why didn’t the police get those violent twelve tear old before Jeff’s story began if they were mental enough to use guns? and how come it was those same idiotic kids who got Lui in jail? and how could large doses of painkiller make jeffy insane? and how is it normal then? and wasn’t he a 13 kid so why’s he called a “man” in the beginning/ hy’s it so typical?vit doesn’t make sense. a bit typical. not too scary. the pic looked like a shark.
how many freaken books or movies do you see that have talking animals, is that realistic. look at two-face for example you think he could of survived what happened to him in real life no, and do you complain i didn’t think so. Leave this story alone its a great story it doesn’t need to be realistic. DAMN..people are never impressed!
I 100% agree!!!!!
As a writer, one of the first things you learn is a little thing called, “suspension of disbelief”
if you can’t keep a reader involved in your world enough to believe that crazy shit can happen, then you failed at suspending their disbelief.
The word that this takes place in is supposed to be an average everyday neighborhood. However the events that take place in the neighborhood feel more like a fever dream or a cheesy gun safety ad. It’s so poorly written that when the TWELVE YEAR OLD jumps a fence and THEN draws a gun, it feels out of place and foolish.
Trust me man, take writing classes, THEN read this story.
I took an English class my sophomore year in HS with a published author as my teacher. We talked much about the “suspension of disbelief”. The thing about it is that it only works within the context of the story itself. This story didn’t make sense within its own logic and certain things have nothing to do with the suspension of disbelief but with the application of common logic. We can ignore the fact that he was healed so quickly after full body burns but it is pretty impossible to ignore the fact that his clothes would be completely ash, impossible to repair.
Let’s just say that those bullies were just abnormally maniacal preteens, as a good storyteller, you at least hint at that with the way that they move or speak and giving somewhat of a background to why they are so damaged. We suspend disbelief when we accept that Jeff gets this random urge to kill people, but a good storyteller explains the urge, at least giving it a source, or relating it to something the reader feels, not just “a weird feeling”.
Part of the flaw in this story is that its just overall horrible storytelling, he gives no background for anyone or anything. Suspension of disbelief is applicable in say, a movie like Interstellar. We suspend disbelief when we accept that a human can survive being sucked into a black hole, or when they travel through a 5th dimension, but we at least get an explanation of this logic in the movie. This is necessary to ask someone to suspend disbelief, at least in a good story.
look. its fine,,,, the fact he made it like that makes it more exciting so fuk off… it was awesome…
Though all this may be true, I found that the story was still very enjoyable and exciting.
Listen, asshat, it’s called fiction, and in this fictional world, the author is it’s god, which means the author can damn well do whatever he/she wants to do with the story. Fuck it if a’int realistic and shit. That’s what fiction is all about. Fiction transcends the boundaries of real life.
If it were, say, a real-life narrative, then, yes, your form of critique would work.
Fuck off if you don’t like the story just ’cause some of the elements YOU expected weren’t present.
Yo, the best works of fiction are supposed to be, like, realistic. That’s what makes them, like, good and shit.
xD lol asshat but i have to agree its not real because if this was real slendy would be real to so tell me have u seen slendy?
Of course. Who hasn’t?
I like your smartass retort sounds like something I would say…Of course. Who hasn’t?
Of course he’s real.
Yes I am real
He is very real…and still owes me 20 bucks.
Have you seen slendy?
I know I have
Why yes. I have seen Slendy. There are dozens of pics in the internet ;D
It still has to make sense within its own fictional universe, this one clearly does not. Learn how to fiction, asshat. This is clearly set in some version of the real world, nothing about any of this is realistic in anyway about how the children act or speak. You can explain ghosts easily in a story like this, you can’t explain kids acting like movie action heros or 30 year old prison thugs, without some kind of crazy world building details, and even then its a bit ridiculous.
F*CK YEAH! So true xD
There’s also something called willing suspension of disbelief.
1/10 on the story, 10/10 on this comment.
The story was silly and not very believable. I felt like I was reading a goofy horror story from the 80s, where all you needed was mindless gore to make a story scary.
I can buy how he killed his brother after “saving” him, because if you think about it, he didn’t necessarily attack the bullies to save his brother, he did it because his less sane side took over.
I agree that the dialogue is contrived, especially when Liu says “poor bro”. Inconsistencies such as his hair not burning off bug me a bit, and I don’t see how anyone would be burnt like that and come out of it with bleached skin and shiny black hair. I mean I guess it makes sense if you’re Michael Jackson lol. But whatever, creepypasta is what it is.
Shut upwith the long
If you are the all-knowing God of CreepyPasta to the point that you can trash others work because they used certain grammar or certain elements in their story. Please. By all mean. Make something better, I want to see what you come up with.
I have always thought that i mean the kid could say
“I SAW SANTA!!!!!! and he tried to kill me and my dad but still…SANTA!!!!!!
My 13 year old bro uses words like that.
That pic tho where the hell is his nose
Jeff’s nose melted, didn’t it?
Kids are getting more and more violent these days, as you can tell from recent events. The fighting scenes do make sense though, the kids charge in with basic tactics while Jeff, with some strange sixth sense deal, has a natural edge towards fighting and easily takes them down. The bullies are shocked at it but come back to re-assert their dominance by attempting to kill Jeff. The parents couldn’t have intervened until the kids were upstairs because they had two loaded guns(unless you bring guns to a kid’s party). The bullies were winning at first, presumably because Jeff playing games with the little kids made him feel younger, more carefree, and less prone to the anger attacks that made him want to kill people. This can make the reader think about what would’ve happened if the kids had confessed beforehand and not returned to get vengeance, because Jeff would’ve stayed a normal kid. A few things don’t really fit like how Randy supposedly had his wrist broken and the other kid his shoulder stabbed and it’s unnoticeable a few days later.
The eyelids couldn’t have burned off in the fire without at least partially blinding him( unless he pulled them off his face a bit and burned them intentionally), and if the people had extinguished the fire on his head(including his hair and eyes), then his hair could have just been singed rather than burnt off. Think of when you throw pine needles or grass into a fire, they don’t just turn straight to ash, first the oils on the surface burn, leaving a black tint and a fragile but firm strand(if you put force into it, it will crumble in your hands but otherwise it will remain whole. I grew up surrounded by pine trees and we had bonfires almost weekly so i know what i’m talking about). So he could just have fragile hair if his hair was just the right length, and if the fire had gotten to his hair last there could be a thin layer of ash stuck to his hair.
Not all killers are the same, and he probably felt betrayed by his family because they all saw him as ugly after he had become what he thought was beautiful. He thought he was so beautiful that he couldn’t take his eyes off of himself and opened them permanently, and kept his smile perpetually smiling. After he’d done that they made it obvious they thought that he was ugly, and so he got angry, prompting his killing spree which took out his brother.
It may not seem to make sense but it fits together if you give it a little thought.
why would jeff kill his brother he wanted to stay with his brother
He turned into a fucking Psycho
dumass
*facepalm* He went nuts….DERP.
BECAUSE HE WENT INSANE YOU ASS-HAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAVE YOU NOT READ THE FUCKING STORY???!!!!
Katrina, I hereby revoke your caps lock privileges.
i was wondering that too, how could randy’s wrist be broken but then be functioning in two days?
and personally, i can see how Jeff would have been cute after the hospital (minus the carved-in smile and burned-off eyelids…)
then all he would be is white with black hair he wouldn’t be scary think about it if you saw a guy with black hair and white skin “maybe he has a skin condition” but add no eyelids with mouth carvings coming at them they would be like “shit were screwed”
If you really spent so much time around fires you’d know that you don’t have to put your hand in the fire for it to burn the hair off your hand.Even though your comment is actually good(not the ignorant retard style), this story has way too many holes.This story is simply bad as it is.
Kids are getting less violent actually, media coverage is just getting more prevalent and sensationalist. What 12 year old trys and murders someone with a gun? Not many even have access to a gun, and they can hope a fence on there bikes? No kid is that stupid honestly, in the rare cases 12 year olds do murder someone, its rarely with guns, and the kids are smart enough to do it at least hidden and not in front of 50 people at a party. They know the consequences and fear them.
Actually I know a kid at my school who tried to do that and he is twelve…. so yeah.
You make some reputable points, however this is a piece of fictional writing, and the author can choose to execute the pasta in whichever style he wants. The boy at the beginning could come from an aristocratic background, or is simply just a literate boy. I’m 13, and when I was around 9-10 years old (I’m guessing that’s how old he was) nothing less would’ve been expected from me. And as for the three bullies, children like that do exist, and it just so happens that three of them were conveyed in this story. The fact that this is a fictional story makes all of these supposed transgressions acceptable.
I thoroughly enjoyed the story though, great work :)
No kids are not like that, maybe in war torn third world countries they’d be willing to murder without fear of the consequences and have such easy access to guns. But not in the suburbs
This story wasn’t made to be believable. It’s a work of fiction. Just sayin’. And I don’t think that was very good “constructive” criticism. You could have been a little nicer about it.
┌∩┐(◣_◢)┌∩┐ BIATCH
Wow so rude dude
Umm… Constructive criticism is not about being nice, right?
Calm your tits, it’s just a story posted on the internet. You shouldn’t expect it to be perfect and professional.
I dont think anyone does, its just nice if they actually make sense, especially when they get this popular. It makes us all look stupid when something that makes no sense gets as popular as the stuff that is written well and has a plausible (within its own universe) story.
Umm, it is just a story bro. Besides, the kid could have been smarter than standards.
Also, didn’t Randy die in the second fight? How did he confess in the end? Everything you said is true and why this story sucks for me.
Arent you suppose to be dead? o.e
No, Liu. The parents heard Randy confess of attacking us in the first fight BEFORE I killed him… And his friends. So yeah he’s dead. *realization* Wait, aren’t you dead? O.o
I do agree, this story is confusing and needs to be read multiple times to understand. e.e
They said the eyewitnesses confessed to seeing Randy and his friends attack first.
He’s not a little kid he’s a teenager
first off i just wanna say your wrong about Jeff going crazy all of the sudden. it is possible for anyone to go psychotic after a week or two. i know because i get those “Feelings” all the time. i’ve had trouble fighting them for a while. i often think of killing my family.
like i’ll walk up behind him and stab him in the throughout then, i’ll kick the back of her knee and stab her in the eye and so on. honestly i wouldn’t mind if Jeff came in the night and cut out my cheeks and lips. if the writer wanted to make Jeff more realistic then he wouldn’t have his eye lids burnt out. i mean try to keep your eyes open for more than twenty minutes. your sight starts to get blurry and your eventually go blind. his mouth and cheeks on the other hand, that is possible. i’ve thought about that and it would work. the only thing that would suck is trying to swallow stuff.honestly i wouldn’t mind if Jeff came in the night and cut out my cheeks and lips.
Look into therapy/counseling. I’m not trolling you; truly, there is no shame in getting counseling when you need it.
nice name
Um yea cutting any part of the face could lead to infection especially around the mouth so please don’t attempt that… Ever.
yea, Derpbutt is pretty awesome. hes the site admin for fucks sake! he puts up with people who make awful stories or make stupid comments, AND keeps his sanity at the same time!
Derpbutt you are awesome
Thanks, zerg!
it’s a fictional story. and when people are truly traumatized, they can go insane in an instant and oh my god leave the dude alone. he wrote a good story so back off.
This story is what traumatized me.
OMG. I feel exactly the same way as you do.
If you legitimately had true intrusive thoughts about wanting to killing your own family, you would NOT be admitting it to the internet, never mind admitting it to yourself so blatantly. Sorry to disappoint you, but you’re not a psychopath.
I use words like that and I’m not as old as you might think. I can/ could use those words and defenses.
i think the way it was written was just fine. the bullies seem like the bullies at my school. they didn’t fight matrix style and the parents probably didn’t step in because shots were being fired. stop saying the things they wrote are “unbelievable” because it is their writing voice,not yours. don’t criticize the way they changed his hair color because the hair does get darker when burnt. it doesn’t always fall off. you have no idea what time the stories setting is in. they were happy with their word choice and i don’t see you posting stories that actually catch the attention of the reader. this story does catch attention.
I think u need to calm the fuck down.
Okay let me get 2 things straight here. 1) yes, I could agree with you on SOME of these things but you don’t have to sound like you despise this person for messing up a little bit. 2) fuck off!! It’s FICTIONAL!! This is creepypasta guys! They’re just stories made to scare the shit out of people! You don’t have to criticize the person for not writing a five star novel! Even if you don’t like it or don’t think its scary, you don’t need to leave your shitty comments anyway. I personally don’t think it’s very scary or creepy at all except the picture and the fact that it involved sleep, but I think it is very interesting. And yes Jeff, your beautiful. I’m not lying.
I really enjoyed this story, but that comment was probably kinda mean, like, how long do you thhink it took to make this story. If you really respect the guy who made this story, then you really shouldn’t be dissing it. And I know I kinda dissed you too, and I’m sorry, but when the OP read this I bet you it made him/her kinda sad or something.
Like 10 minutes, he said how long he thought it took to right, it looks like this was the first draft of a really bad story.
i say stuff like that all the time i’m 13.
i’m gonna go over yonder hill.
You guys should look up Eyeless Jack
didn’t your mummy teach you not to tell strangers your age? they might take a shine to you, you know.
You never know the kid might have been a nerd and you critize to much
To everyone complaining about the people who are giving this story a bad review. They are giving constructive criticism. Sure, they could say it in a nicer way but if no one points out the bad things about the story, the author will never (ok, mabye not as quickly) get better as a writer.
For example, if a kid makes a sandwhich and fills it with, say poop, (im not saying this story is poopy) and no one points out how it tastes like poop, then he will always make poop sandwhiches and never be a good sandwhich maker.
As for the story, it can keep you captivated, has average grammar, and yes, a little unrealistic at times. Now, im not saying that a story has to be realistic, it is fictional afterall, but a little realism helps with the creepiness as you can be able to believe that it can happen to you or, in this case, actually happened. 8/10.
Sorry for the long comment.
I Pressed submit by mistake.
Adults:Hey these kids are engaged in deadly combat…
The smart moneys on the fat one.
not to mention that he got the same thing he was wearing earlier “cleaned and stitched” if he was on fire his clothing would NOT have been okay after being “cleaned and stitched”
I will have you know that staff nurse Lucy sat up all night washing and sewing his burned to fuck clothes, all so he would look all edgy and cool, because you don’t want to be murdered by someone in plaid, do you? So she ignored the cries of those gently bleeding to death in the ward just so Jeff could drive home looking sharp. She is this stories true hero and needs some respect dammit! xx
i agree with that but that snapping actually makes sense because before he went insane he was already feeling crazy and wanting to hurt people. All he needed was an outside source to push his mental state out of control. True, Psychopaths do care for few people but remember that he felt betrayed by his mom which pushed him even more, But the preteens being punks like that was a little too much maybe if their age was increased it would be better plus the party didn’t make a great location. So the metal factors are accurate but outside characters need to be change a little.
Agree with this comment completely. Yes, it’s a work of fiction but it still needs to make sense.
Yes, some kids might use words like ‘ominous’ etc. but Jeff’s character didn’t really seem like the kind of guy who would. In fact, he pretty much had NO character. None of the character’s did.
The dialogue was horrific. I couldn’t take the story seriously with comments like ‘poor bro’.
Not to mention, the way the mother reacts at the end.
She walks in on her kid horrifically mutilating himself and says ‘What are you doing?’ then proceeds to run off to fetch a gun? Are you kidding?
Pfft. ‘What are you doing’… I mean, this is her KID, yeah?
Also, are you SURE the legal system works like that? No trial, no interrogation? Just, you know, a COP says ‘Nah, you kids are lying. Not listening to your side of the story. Here’s your charge’. Now I thought there was a bit more of a process then that.
Seriously. I kept hearing references to this ‘Jeff the Killer’ so I thought I ought to check it out, expecting something creepy or at least intelligent. Find this shit instead.
You guys sure don’t have taste.
Shut the fu ck up. If you don’t like the story from the beginning, don’t finish reading it! Nobody wants to deal with all of your hate and bad shit you say about this. It’s just stupid. I really liked the story and I think the author did a really good job on it. He probably worked really hard on it too. SO QUIT HATING.
I bet they worked hard to build Chernobyl too. Working hard does not equal good results.
Real talk, I can’t understand why this is apparently so highly regarded. It is not good.
He did not kill his brother. If you go to the begging a kid toll a story lingt to the end. I think they met liu was the kid at the begging
GO TO SLEEP
he became a sociopath duh
I love this story because I am doing a slide show about Jeff the killer and Jane the killer, eyeless jack,hodie,slendy, and Jeff the killer with a Mexican hat
It’s a badass sombrero. Not a mexican hat.
go to sleep :D
:real
Ok so this is unrealistic but really the only part “creepy” about it is like said the bullies would not be that brutal, psychopaths have some sense of sanity, so killing the only people they love is kinda true, but things usually have to set them off, parents, other kids, and cops would show up soon during the fight. I may not be able to write a story this popular, but not burning your hair off after burning your eyelids makes no sense. I really don’t want to look like a “hater”, but I feel this lacked quality.
The news reporters probably chose those words to make the little boy more “understandable”. Thats what they actually do u know? =3
Yeah I agree, and can I add on? I don’t think that his NOSE burned off! look at the pic to see what I mean
If u have read the other stories about jeff, he fallen for a girl called wendy. She kissed him when he was about to kill her and thought that his lips betrayed him , he burned his lips and his nose as ‘bonus’. SPOILER ALERT!!!!!
OMG i read that^^ i wanna be wendy……
FYI, you don’t put spoiler alert at THE END of the comment.
Also Jeff is like a rip off of joker
No. Joker is a rip-off of Jeff. Haven’t you seen the poster where Joker says “Why so serious?”? Yes joker came first, but now it’s starting to become ridiculous!
Actually…
The Dark Knight, which featured the Joker with the carved smile, came out in 2008.
Jeff the Killer, on the other hand, came out three or four years later.
Sooooo, yeah…
He wasnt a young boy he was 14-17
That is still a child.
Oh be quiet. If you hate the story don’t even bother to comment down here. I’m sick of all the haters saying that it’s ridiculous. Just keep it to yourself. The world doesn’t need to know you hate it.
No, but criticism is always good. This is very poorly written. With criticism the author can learn, without and this stupid everyone deserves an a for effort! attitude, you’ll never improve.
That’s just ridiculous. Is it your story? No. You don’t get to decide what people write. Plus, you aren’t insane so you don’t know if they care for people or not. If you don’t like it, keep it to yourself and right your own god damn story.
I am younger then Jeff was and I use words like ominous and illuminating and horrendous.
uhhh….do u think its supposed to be believable?? ur reading this on a website not based on relisticness but on creepiness. i dont think the author was aiming for perfect facts to satisfiy critics like u. in my opinion they were aiming for a GREAT story line, which is what the produced. thank you and goodnight.
Shit story line, it’s fiction but has to make sense within its own universe, which this does not.
disturbing photo
I feel so bad.. Jeff used to be such a good kid………. now thanks to Randy, he’s a maniac!
:(
I agree with the word choice part, but the reason he killed Liu was he just liked killing. And perhaps he did feel bad about it some time in the future.
TA: ii hone2tly diidnt like thii2. iit diidnt conviince me at all
i loved the story and because the author made it that way i love it its so unique…. i have no idea why people are hating this piece of beautiful work ..it may sound over the top but that’s how i fell :)
Did the story trip you? xx ;-)
I know they probably don’t like children on here, but screw it, I don’t get nightmares easily. I’m twelve, almost thirteen, and I always talk like that. It’s normal if the child has a rather large vocabulary, which I do. In the story, Jeff is my age. Are you saying that we speak like nine year old? How despicable. Why don’t you stop judging children like they’re all the same. I know better, why don’t you? Also, “Illuminating” “horrendous” and “ominous” are all quite small words. It’s funny you adults think you know better. Not all children now-a-days shout “YOLO” whilst doing something horrendous. Or just say “SWAG” like they’re better. No, I want to either be a teacher, or a writer when I grow up. I do not believe in either “SWAG” nor “YOLO”. In fact the two disgust me beyond expectation. So, I have finished my rant. This small twelve year old who knows better thank others in her age group shall be on her way. Farewell.
XD HE LOOKS LIKE A RACOON
He totally does XD
this is freaky as hell says max.sleep wasent inportant any way says lucas
I spoke with those words when I was young, however I do agree with the rest of what you said.
I have to agree that this is not a good piece of writing at all.
Character depth is lacking. And any sort of believability is lost.
It could have been a good enough idea, for a cheap scare, if those things were addressed but they’re just not.
Firstly, the three bullies are far too generic. Along with that, is the fact that I don’t believe in them at all. They wield knives for stealing bus fares and then they turn up at parties brandishing guns, intent on using them and aiming them at a house full of people. What were they thinking? Maybe they would have just jumped the fence on their skateboards again and fled afterwards.
The character Jeff seems too rushed. He seemed to develop these weird feelings and act on them almost straight away.
Getting beaten up doesn’t make you start to have psychotic feelings. Might make you mad for awhile, but that’s it.
His mental state towards the end didn’t seemed to match anything that was before. I know he had ‘feelings’ but that’s all. They should have been expanded on more. Maybe his feelings were just from fighting. Maybe he could have become a boxer instead of a maniac. But no, he went from enjoying feeling powerful, to trying to change his appearance to match his feelings? The feelings of being insane? Or the feelings of power? Because they are not the same.
As for his ‘transformation’? Well, there’s enough been said about that already.
Also, “A thing of bleach,” and “The bleach bleached,” aren’t exactly the best use of words.
I don’t want to sound like I’m being horrible. I’ve put together some bad writing too, but try and look upon these criticisms as a positive to better your work.
You have no idea almost every kid talks like that these days. My friend is 10 and is every scentence of our skype convesrsation is: fuck, damn, bitch, and shit.
Okay, i am not happy with the comment someone posted… By the way the kid was most likely trying to explain it to get attention using bigger words then he most likely most likely said! And Jeff only killed his brother because he was going crazy! can you not read? You are a hater.
You’re gonna have to be objective if you want anyone to listen to what you say.
HOW CAN YOU SAY THAT?! This is the best story ever! And don’t get me wrong, the pre-teen violence thing was kinda wierd.. But I’ve seen 9 year-olds engage in junk more violent than this. This was the best story I’ve EVER read, and I’m the biggest book-worm in my school! And how you said that his hair would have burned off, that is WRONG. It is possible for hair to burn to another color, if it was tough. You are the biggest RETARD I have ever seen (or read) if you thought this was garbage. THE ONLY PERSON I hate more than you right now, is your mom. FOR GIVING BIRTH TO YOU. >:(!!!!
You honestly need to reduce your daily intake of internet.. You must be quite a young bookworm.
I agree with you. It’s a good idea but it was very poorly executed. I was looking forward to reading it but struggled with the outlandishness of it all, and the grammar and mechanics were much more horrifying than the story itself. Switching tenses every ten seconds is jarring and irritating.
It IS hard to write stories, and like I said the idea is great, but every writer benefits from constructive criticism and a basic draft, edit, draft, etc. process will always take your work to a higher level.
I think people commenting and tearing others apart for expressing their distaste in a lot of basic elements of this pasta are good for standing up for the OP, but need to understand that even a modicum of revision and editing would have turned this into a good pasta. If the OP were willing to undertake more of the writing process than sitting down and banging out a story in an evening and re-released these as more polished work, they would be very creepy indeed.
Kill the kid so soon? HIS BROTHER WAS KILLED AT THE END. Not beginning END.
i completely disagree if you notice there family is a strict one and i know some strict families make them learn words like this or he may just have wanted to be a smart kid to confuse people in allot of ways Jeff is kinda like me I’ve learn those words when i was about 7 to 9 so don’t give any of that crap kids at any age can learn these words if they want to
Umm… Okay, I have quite a few explanations for your problems. The young boy? You had a problem with him saying those words? Who says he was really little? By ‘young’ they could have meant that he was 11 or 12. Something like that.
Your other problem, the cliche words. Using “son” and “that’s final” is perfectly fine. Maybe they wanted to use those words to make the story seem normal at first. Ever think of that?
The bullies. You know, there could be kids like that. Not all kids are sweet little things. They tried to make them seem like jerks to make Jeff insane.
The parents not trying to stop the fight? Randy and his friends said that if anybody moves, they will get shot. So, the parents couldn’t help. They didn’t want their kids to die.
Another thing, psychopaths couldn’t really csre for anyone. They’re insane. They can’t really control it. (I know, I’m not insane. I’m most likely guessing. That’s what it seems like.)
I don’t really know how to explain the other solutions so…..Yeah.
I’m just saying…and I’m really wondering if you just came here to hate, or read the story.
He was 13. It said that Randy was about 12. one year younger than Jeff.
I came here to read the story but stayed for the hate xx
I’m twelve and I talk like that, I know bullies that act in unison and evil like that, all the kids were armed, we are not as wise as adults, Jeff was raving insane and had no feelings but hate, again, ALL THE KIDS WERE ARMED AND NO ADULT IN THEIR RIGHT MIND WOULD STOP THEM, and finally, bleach will turn your hair from brown to black. The story had no holes if you had common sense of the real world.
Actually, bleach will turn your hair a whiter color because it burns the pigment out of your skin. It was the fire that turned it black.
A good and loving parent would walk though fire to save their child. When I was a child, a young Dad tried to save his son who fell in to a canal while on a walk with his dad and brother. He couldn’t swim but he didn’t think twice because his son was dying. I remember other parents saying they would have done the same thing, because a parent who would do nothing as their child was in danger is a piece of crap. And the child was pulled out by someone who ran to the canal after hearing the screams but the Dad drowned. So unless they were all short listed for Shitty Mum & Dad of the year, someone would have stood up and risked their neck xx
Alright, I suppose those things are true, but don’t you think you’re being a tad harsh? It’s obviously fiction, you don’t need to try scour out everything that could possibly be executed in a better or more rational way.
The words you mentioned aren’t very big at all… You don’t have to be old to have a good vocabulary. Most people can be familiar with words like that at about age 8 or 9.
I don’t think this is supposed to be believable…killing his brother and parents? Going completely psychotic in a matter or days? Perfect combat skills? It’s a fictional story. A horror story. A CREEPYPASTA. It’s a wicked storyline and a recognized Internet legend for a reason, dude.
Good story, poorly written- let me point out the first fault. Little boys don’t talk like that. Work on your story telling skills, sweetie.
I also agree that this… this was just awful. -_- Try making up excuses that the characters could’ve gotten through rough shit, but no 12 year olds can pull those stunts off!! There are so many more cons than pros about this story, that there probably much to argue about:this story just plain sucked. Although, I give the writer props for having some creativity, but… oh my God. Enough said.
The parents didn’t stop the fighting becuase the other 2 kids Troy and Keith pulled out guns I don’t think anyone wanted to get shot
dude have you seen the kids talk these days the like to use big words especially middle schoolers
Don’t be hating on this story, it’s better than some of the others that you find on the web, have you ever read Buried Alive? WORST CREEPYPASTA EVER!
No the worst pasta on the site is Jeff the killer!
Fuck you Thats where I think your wrong. I think it’s one of the best!
Calm your face, child. It’s just a story
I’m embarrased for this writer. OMG. I was thinking all of the same things.
This is what I as thinking throughout. I liked the ideas, but your way of writing needs some work.
I agree. Things like when the cop says “looks like a year in juvi” were kind of ridiculous. No cop would give “sentence” a child. That is the judge’s job. The cop’s job, is simply to explain why the person is being arrested, read said person his/her miranda rights, and to take this person to the jail holding. (As well as get a full hand written description of what happened.) The officer would have both boys write in detail their side of the story, and he would take both boys in for further questions if he felt the need to. This story in under researched. There were a lot of cliche’s, but Ender Wiggin killed another kid in Ender’s Game, and he was just as young as these kids. The difference between the characters in this story and in Ender’s Game, is that Ender’s Game was written by a professional, while this story appears to be written by a 14 year old. (Or a very sheltered young adult)
It was a good story line. It has some definitive potential. If written right, and with enough detail, it could become a nail-bitingly, suspenseful novel. If the “strange feelings” are played up. If Jeff starts having dreams. If the characters start seeming more real. If a voice starts to tell Jeff that his new face isn’t quite right, or if there is a full chapter on the parents attempting to escape, and failing, and the character leaving the house to search for a new victim, then the story could fill out more, and really become something.
I think the author should keep working on it. Basically, if you are going to comment about how you don’t like an author’s piece, maybe you could add some helpful constructive criticism, instead of being a little shit head.
dude, really, this is how a good story is supposed to sound. even though he used words like that doesnt mean its a bad story.
Hey! This is my favorite Creepypasta!
1. Maybe the kid was a very smart kid, and a lot of parents use the words and Thats final.
2. Bullies are like that sometimes. And I know that, because bullies like that killed my best friend.
3. Maybe the parents didnt want to get themselves hurt. Or maybe they were trying to protect their children.
4. Maybe these kids were taught to fight.
5. Yeah, actually, it does make sense. He was crazy, so he killed his brother.
6. Sometimes hair blackens.
7. It’s supposed to be creepier.
YESSSSSS FINALLY SOME F**KING GOOD FEEDBACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Umm..no. You said…MAYBE…Maybe is not used! If it’s a good story, you don’t need your own conclusions to make the story seem better!
When I was a kid I talked like that
I’m 10 and i use words like that,sheesh
The author never specified the age of the boy so it’s your assumption that is causing it to seem unnatural. Saying it’s a boy just means a male that is not considered an adult so the boy in the story could be 16 or 17, and a 16 or 17 year old should be at a level of english where they can use words like ominous, illuminating and horrendous. Also the bystander effect is what would of caused all the parents to not do anything at the party during the fight between Jeff and Randy, and if you don’t know what the bystander effect is it is where no one does anything because they all think that someone else will. The fact that they also had two guns drawn on them also makes the bystander effect more likely to occur. Also when criticizing someone you can do it without sounding like an over opinionated dick head.
He does actually, jeffs between 12-14. Thats pretty specific. Not much difference between those ages. from 12 to probably around 18 would this all seem unnatural, and jeff definitely fits somewhere in that age range.
The parents didn’t stop the first the house because two of the bullies had guns dumbass
Right. Because 13 year olds with guns is soo threatening. But that brings up bigger questions. Why did they have guns? Why would they try and kill a guy they literally just met? How can they jump a yard fence on skateboards? If they were crazy enough to try and kill someone they just met, with guns that should be much harder to get (this is so so so unlikely already) Why would they do it infront of like 30 witnesses? The cases where kids do murder, it’s not infront of witnesses, they’re smart enough to know the consequences. No suburban bully would act this way, it’s just stupid, it makes no sense at all. Hell most bullies anywhere wouldn’t act this way.
I disagree. Maybe it’s a genius child, so they know those words. It’s possible.
When you put a story on a site like this you’re putting it up for criticism. I agree with Alexander that the story was indeed unrealistic at a points. I think with a bit of editing this story has lots of potential. The concept behind it is creepy though. A part I’m a bit unsure of is the strange feelings Jeff had. I’ve read this story multiple times and haven’t quite figured out what you were really trying to say there. One last thing we all have our own opinions and tastes. Just because someone doesn’t like this story doesn’t mean you can be immature, start swearing and being an asshole to the one giving the criticism. To the ones giving the criticism you don’t need to be so rude about it. You can give pointers without being so mean about it. -BrandonRJ
I think the ‘feeling’ that Jeff was having in this story, was his sanity slowly starting to fade. In my opinion of course.
You’re really one of those people who just looks for things to say that are bad about the story? Wow. And who cares if its unnatural? This is CreepyPasta, and its not in the “Based on True Stories” category. I mean, CreepyPasta is supposed to be unnatural. But there are some things I could agree with you on. But it was a good story nonetheless.
All the stories on this site are fiction, but they make sense in the world they’re set in. This does not. For a story to be good, it has to make sense and feel natural. If someone wrote a story where every parent in the worlds gotta beat there kid every night, and they just sort of mention this in passing, no explanation for why, or reaction to it, and then in the mornings they all cut themselves to get there day going. Say this happens, but the story starts off basicly set in the real world, or some version of it, none of those things really contribute to the story, they just sort of happen, no explanation or logical reasoning behind it. Would it not be a stupid story? That is jeff the killer.
The errors in this story are like an elephant in the grass; you don’t have to look for it, because you’d be blind not to see it.
I am also a TEN YEAR OLD. I’m not retarded. I use words like “illuminate” and such all the time. I am not one of those idiots that says “libary” instead of “library”.
Since when are 10 year olds allowed to use the internet unsupervised? Thats some bad parenting right there. Lot of really twisted little things that, if to much exposure on the nerdy lonely kids who spend to much time on it (i.e. me when younger) Can really just warp your mind.
and no you probably don’t, even if you do it doesnt matter you do, the majority don’t, and it is never once specified that jeff is some smart advanced kid or anything. If you’re going to have a character trait that’s so out of place and jarring from the norm, it has to be explained. Like any nerdy smart young kid in stories usually has some sort of reason for it, their lonely and spend all their time reading etc. It needs to be explained.
Bruh, i talk like that.
Sometimes kids are that violent. :P
But they’re not, not really, if they approach that kind of violence it’s not after knowing someone after a single day, and they’re smart enough to do it in secret and quietly. Kids that age understand the consequences of murder.
But not the spoiled kids of this generation that think they can get away with anything.
Well at.least some kids are smart like me.
I personaly hate jeff thhe killer. The writer of it is sick and I refuse to beleve he is a mentally stable human. Get a life O worthless writer of jaff the killer you need help. I totally agree with you. Most of the comments i have read already stated most of the mistakes I found but I still have a few. The people in the story don’t act like real people, like the speach and the fact that the little kids act like dragon ball z fighters on meth and burn people alive in broad daylight in a house full of adalts. At the beginning a little boy manages to fend off an armed assailant 2 times his sise who should not even be able to get in a house with all the security systems and screens for Windows.And some how jeff magically knows exactly where to go to escape and uses his body to smash a window and jump out.O I almost forgot jeff wold go blind without his eiylids in a mader of days so instead of a knife jeff might stab you with a fish or something.
Hey, my brothers named Simon!
I enjoyed this more than the story and I was thinking basically all of these same thoughts while reading. Also I thought it was already going downhill quickly at the very beginning with the little boy not only speaking as an adult writing a story where he is the hero; but also a little boy fighting off a crazed psychopath while receiving no injuries the entire time. The police show up so quickly too, even in richer neighborhoods this is literally impossible. Everything feels so forced and generic it was just an awful read.
On a note, one of the most famous books in America literature, To kill a mockingbird, portrays an even younger child (scout being just 5) as using words quite like, if not even more advanced than those of the young narrator of this story.
Please don’t even try to compare this to mockingbird. Difference’s being this is written like shit, that is not, in mockingbird the child speaking that way makes sense, in this theres no explanation why and it’s jarring. In mockingbird the kid speaks naturally with those words, in this it comes off incredibly forced (because it is).
mmmmm…..the story has so much unnatrual parts but I don’t agree you beacuse I know so much young people will talk like this and yong kids still can be violent
like this.
Ugh thank you I expected so much more to this. Is this seriously the original? Like I see Jeff the Killer everywhere and come to this. I had to skim through it. And I’m glad someone pointed it out and if someone has a better one please link it thank you c:
Yeah, I know, i was thinking the exact same thing. I’ve been trying to get into this creepsmcpasta guy, but I have to say, he has pretty good storylines, but writes them in a way that seems unbelievable. I know there fictional stories and aren’t supposed to sound realistic, but, well, you know what im getting at.
I am not trying to be discourteous, I am a twelve year old female and I happen to use words such as ominous or appalling all the time. Haha, I am not exactly a normal one as you might have pictured.
your right about everything except the unlikeliness of jeff killing his brother. Crazy is Crazy man…(people like that don’t have limits). and also if you reread the story he has crazy reasoning regarding the mom and dad to kill the little brother. In his mind he is finishing what he started and probably getting high of off doing so.
Also how is jeff not an enigma cause it sounds like you don’t understand why jeff behaves the way he does (making him mysterious and difficult to understand) or what an enigma is for the matter
At the same time, IT’S A CREEPYPASTA. If you don’t like it, go to MLP fanpage or something
GO TO SLEEEEEEEEEEP
Dude. It’s fiction.
As of right now i am making a sort of sequel to this and the second story, which is in the Crappypastas. it made sense and i decided to write a series that includes all of the Creepypasta universe, with familiars such as slenderman and The Face. I hope you will enjoy these as much as i will enjoy writing them.
oh my god i was a good story shut up
This is fucking insane i mean how do you not know your son is a fucking physco.
I think they clicked as their son was carving himself a shiny new grin on his face xx
As far as the way they speak, that can vary greatly by region. My dad calls me “son” all the time. I don’t see why you find it so rare
Oh come ON. Give the guy a break. It’s a STORY. Not a biography! And for crying out loud, who CARES if the kid uses big words? You need to get a life so you don’t have the spare time to write a freaking ESSAY critiquing someone else’s FINE work. Thank you and goodbye.
Whatever man it’s a great story everyone in my school loves it
For your second paragraph in your comment, the author probably did that to make it seem like it was the perfect family in the perfect world, like nothing could go wrong, and then it does, showing that nobody is safe when it comes to serial killers and/or insanity, which -in my mind- makes this one of the best pastas I’ve ever read!
Also, it never said that Liu dies. It says “He slowly raised the knife ready to plunge it into Liu. Liu thrashed here and there trying to escape Jeff’s grip.” Not once did I hear that Liu dies, or Jeff stabbing Liu in the chest. At the end, Jeff just says “Go to sleep”. End of story. Actually Liu doesn’t die. At least, not at the time. If you read the story of ‘Jane the Killer’ on CrappyPasta. It states that Liu escapes Jeff, goes to his friend, Jane. She answers the door, as Jeff sneaks in, who then kills the both of them. Jane is upset and wants revenge for herself and her friend. Sorry for spoilers, but that’s the truth. Mind blown? Most likely.
You don’t know the meaning of a psychopath. Psychopaths don’t have feelings for others, they only pretend they do. Also, you’re complaining that it’s unrealistic and that every one is fighting matrix style. It’s a story! A horror story! You think it would be interesting if everything was completely like the real world and then boom, everyone dies, sounds great. *sarcasm*
This is my opinion anyway, I don’t intend to just take away yours, if you don’t like it that’s fine, but still, just saying that some of your points seem a bit silly.
First, off you don’t just snap and become a psychopath. It does not work like that! He might of went crazy, but he’s is not a psychopath that is for sure. Second, horror is suppose to be realistic! Let’s take the Conjuring. That was a very realistic movie and that’s why it was so scary because hell, every seemed like real people and the world felt real that may mean it could happen to me!
That’s terrifying! Not scarier the audience with gallons of bloods or torture or bad Photoshop/CGI to make them wonder at night if that monster is coming for them!
I’d have to disagree kids talk about that stuff now and days
Look, I agree with some of the things you’re saying. But you’re sounding like that mean high school math teacher that criticizes everything. This isn’t the freaking New York Times, the is Creepypasta. I admit that you’re right about the language thing, and the thing about the bullies being too violent. (There’s no way they would let teenagers carry guns. You have to be 18 to own one.) But still, we’re not expecting William Shakespeare to be writing this. So everyone has their own opinion, but Jeff the Killer is the most viewed and most discussed Creepypasta. So obviously somebody must have liked it. Again, on many of your points I agree, just be nicer, okay?
Just because someone is underage doesn’t mean they can’t get guns. In England most firearms involved in crimes are illegally imported or modified but young kids, gawd bless them, still have them. But everything else I agree with. Personally I’m not a fan but oodles of folks are so I’m in a minority. I’m new to this site and love it xx
lol your a hater
For the record…I am not going to disagree with most things except for the fact that you stated that little kids don’t use big words, when In fact I did Just thought I’d point that out ^w^ *she puts in her headphones and walks off* Bye now
Stop bein such a hater it is a creepy pasta story it won’t be complete perfection! #JeffdaKiller
This is the first creepypasta I have ever read so…
No offense, but you just seem like a kid hater.
The adults couldn’t help out because they were protecting the young kids and the kids had GUNS.
And kids get involved in lots of violence. Haven’t you heard all the school shootings/stabbings? They happen on almost a regular basis.
All of these people saying “I wanna see you do better,” take note that you do not have to be a 5 star chef to say that the food tastes bad.
But this kid is a psycho path dont u think he will use those words?So then he can coonfuse people
umm… ur kinda right about alot of things, but jeff is known all over the world now.. and lots of ppl love him… so u were wrong on one thing out of idk how many xDD
I talked that way when I was a kid…
There is No age on Psychological Effect that an adult can get that a young teenager can get, there is no age on Psychological disorders, as I do believe that killing his brother was a bit unorthodox I like the story, maybe the writer could write a sequel and clear the rough edges up.
Thank you for writing all this so I didn’t have to.
To all of the people trying the justify the child at the beginning speaking like a fucking scholar, you need the remember that this child was almost a victim of a serial killer. If you had just been through a situation as traumatic as that, you wouldn’t talk like that. A child presumably under 13 would almost certainly be a complete mess after something like that and wouldn’t say ‘once more’ ‘illuminating’ and ‘ominous’. It’d be damned impressive if they could bring themselves to talk about it at all, let alone talk about like a fucking poet.
Also, justifying Jeff killing his family just by saying that ‘he went insane’ doesn’t work either. That just doesn’t happen. There is no motivation for him to do that. I know that this isn’t real, but it seems to be trying to give a rational back-story to the character, so you need a realistic motivation. Where do these murderous feelings come from? Why does he act on them so quickly? In general, what the fuck is going on with this?
Another thing, how does Jeff (a child of about 13/14) manage to burn his own eyelids off without totally destroying his eyes? Even if he didn’t burn his eyes out too, he’d definitely go blind within a few days due to exposure to air and dust.
Believe it or not Jeff lovers, but this is badly written. You can still like it, but from an literary perspective, it’s dreadful and it needs criticism to improve it. There is nothing wrong with criticism. Without it we’d likely all be dead, because nobody would question anything anyone else says.
Exactly. The point is not so much whether kids know those words or not; it is the fact that it does not ring true as *dialogue* from either a kid or an adult. I could believe that a kid wrote that sentence; in fact, I am pretty sure that a kid *did* write that sentence. But no one speaks that way off the cuff. The words are not as much of a problem as the way the supposed dialogue reads — too polished, not spontaneous.
is not meant to be realistic it is to be terrifying and they made a good job
i understand most of what you said.. its pop because everyone love pyschopaths.
i think u are pulling some real chiz here. the author did an AMAZING job at this!!!!!! dont judge him/her because of cliche it was written in 2006 back then it wasnt cliche at ALL and the “son” phrase was used often back then. so please, shut up.
i love this story so much its is my favorite
“and the lest goes on”
there goes your credibility buddy.
Bravo, and thank you. This is just.. terrible. I can’t believe so many people enjoy this. I am growing more and more aware that this was most likely written by a thirteen year old and only enjoyed by more of the same age. Come back when you are all past your teens and see if you still enjoy this extreme mess of a story. If you are older than say… 18…. shame on you…. shame shame shame on you for not seeing the laziness in this writing.
All hate no love it’s actually a great story.
Do me a favor, go look at ten Pastas. Now, come back and tell me which ones are FRICKING REALISTIC!!! None? One? Two? Are they all completely realistic? Probably not.
I talked like that. Although, I was a strange child. Now I’m a strange Teenager! whoop whoop!
By far this is my favorite Creepypasta story.
Even though the author does use very formal words (which are not commonly used by 13-year-old boys) It is still an amazing story, and I would like to see you argue against that.
Stop judging a story based on one tiny thing. I think the author uses this type of language to make the story seem a little more eerie. If they had used words like “cool” and “dude”, it would take away some of the fright of the story.
remember they pointed the guns at the parents and told to stay out of this? :)
I completely agree about the fighting sequence. Kids don’t fight like that. Kids kick and punch and slap but they don’t know how to totally fight like adults do. Plus bullies at their age wouldn’t go as far as kill a kid in front of so many parents. I am revisiting this story because this is my first creepypasta I ever read. This makes me feel an attachment to it so I love this pasta for introducing me to this site.
Actually, I had a very good vocabulary at that age, as my mother was an English teacher for a high school, so I grew up with a well-rounded dictionary of words…
true dat
I don’t agree. The fighting parts it is possible that Jeff could do all those things. He clearly had anger issues and a taste for blood but masked them both. If someone with those two traits were to black out then they could easily do those things. I would know from personal experience that when one blacks out in a violent manner it’s basically an adrenaline shot. Also the young boy in the beginning could have said hings like that depending on how much he reads. Read enough and your vocabulary would spread a lot.
One last thing. His hair could singe to a different color. I was searching through the comments and found some one (not sure if it was this site or another Creepypasta site) who had given a reasonable excuse as to why his hair didn’t burn.
no matter those words were used, the story would still be good, mine uses simple wording, and it sound’s good too (at least for the people i know)
actually I talk that way a lot and im just a young girl… I tend to even use words such as “Concillianormative” and sometimes even describe things as “ominous” just as the writer made Jeff describe things. I also have a friend who has parents who call him “son” and my mother says “that’s final”. I honestly believe that you wanted to post this comment just for feedback, but just remember, im 13 years old and I know for a fact that some kids that are just a tad more intellectual than others use descriptive words regularly. ALSO it is possible for preteens to possess such spectacular fighting skills, as I myself have been participating in martial arts since the age of six. I believe Jeff went insane the moment he beat u the kids at the bus stop and just didn’t know it right away. It can take time to really find out that you have a problem. You cant tell me you wouldn’t look at the world differently if you almost died! I know I would. sure, maybe I wouldn’t go absolutely insane and murder my family but still, I believe that you should have thought out your argument a bit more before posting it. On that same note, he cut off his eyelids because he wanted to be able to keep looking at his face. he didn’t just do it for fun or anything. If they burned of in the fire a whole piece of this story wouldn’t have been written-well typed in this case. however, I really hope that you do realize I don’t wish to argue but I felt the need to when I saw this comment. Jeff the Killer is a pretty good pasta in my opinion, if only you saw this story for what is, not what it could be -Onyx Genocide
the kid at the beginning is fine, I spoke like that.
^this^
I think you are being a little too critical, sure the young boy might not use words like that but young boy could refer to anyone under the age of 18 really. Cliche phrases ARE natural, everyone uses them in everyday life. It’s a story, and has a fun storyline.
It’s actually sociopaths that can care for some people, psychopaths don’t care for anyone and just manipulate them into thinking that they do, when really they are just waiting to make their move. Jeff’s mind snapped, which is why he was so ready to kill the three bullies and his family. As for the three bullies trying to kill Jeff, they were filled with anger and the humiliation that they got their butts kicked by one guy.
well i don’t agree on this, and most of the people might not think the way i do. but i will say my thing with every paragraph that you made ok.
paragraph 1. if the kid hear that word menny times it can actually talks like that. especially if the kid learn fast
paragraph 2. if it was in the year around 1960-1970-1980-1990 yes parents did talk like that. they didn’t have the internet or the technologie that we have today so when it was final it was final.
paragrath 3. as i say befor if it was around those part of the time or years. yes there was litle kids of 12 or 13 years old that can be that bad if there parents was as bad as them. but since we dont know about the 3 bullies parents personality we canot juge how they are acting. and question for the 5th tiny paragraph: will you do somthing if you have a gun in front of you? even if its a kid. i dont think so. i dont think you will try to help and get shots at.
paragraph 6. we can all agree that its a story even thought that its only a legend. but if you think about it. its kill or be kill. dont think just act. so yes they might just have a verry skills about figthing. maybe his brother lue or someone else in jeff his pass show him some move for fun. we dont know the full story befor all this happen.
paragraph 7. it wasn’t so silly if we think about it, jeff was always alone and got bullied a lot. we don’t know if he got bullied all is elementary school and snap at his middles school. and with all the news about some kids shooting everyone in a school it could have happen almost the same thing with jeff (look for some news at: http://www.cbc.ca/news/world/washington-school-shooting-2-dead-including-lone-gunman-1.2812380 ) and for killing his bro. should i make you remamber that he as been hit on his head by some of the 3 kids with a bottle of beer over the head, also as been burn by the fire and fall of the stairs. witch that could have unstable his brain and also with the shots of pain killers might not have helps his problem if his head was already effected.
paragrath 8. actualy that one i will agree that comment is intresting but i saw a pic long ago. there was. well i think there was tiny piece of hair that was still on thop of his head and his skin was white but burn. the tiny piece left might be lack from the smoke or things like that. its possible that it wasn’t black natural. (in this video in 1:05 and clic pause. and look well on the pic of the fake news papper. it might make more sens:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NKcPX9iIzNs&spfreload=10 )
and i will go on. why judge on a story when you know its fake? no one actualy cares if it is or not. its a fairy tale. there is some truth and some lies. look he was more successful then you are cuz seriously. that story is way more famous then your enigma thing cuz i didn’t hear from it. and even thought everyone as there on opinion but let me tell you this. dont say something when you know nothing about it. look i m done. no need to rely on my comment. there is no need i might not see it until couple month. and i m talking to the anonymous guy that write that 3 years ago. the other well ill see
Yeah that’s somewhat shitty. the writer should’ve written it with sensibility. i’m not say’n that it not interesting anyways. well i imagined Jeff as a brown haired and blue eyed cutie when i first HEARD about him. i never saw him until one day i was soooo interested in this story that i wanted to see how Jeff looked like so i surfed the internet and saw his image. i admit it was pretty cute. i also wanted to see how he looked like before the so called ‘ACCIDENT’. He had blue eyes and brown hair. he’s seriously good looking and cute, i must say. i’m still confused at why he’d kill his parents and liu and for worst i’m confused about why he’d go insane after a horrid fight with those three bullies. maybe cause he freaked out when the bleach poured on him or because of the fire………….depending on the situation. WAIT!!! i noticed this line about Jeff getting a strange feeling. Oh and something inside of Jeff snapped too!! maybe because of those three idiots, the innocent cutie’s life got ruined. It was just an idea.
Oh and I’m new to this site and i’m 12yrs old and soon to be 13 this year on 8th October 2015. hope to meet new people and get good ideas for you and from you! XD
byeeeeeeee
xoxoxo
Rax……… ;)
I TALK LIKE THAT! Im 13. But then again, I’m in those smart classes.
Depending on the perspective of the childs imagination . The author just incorporates a wide vocabulary using child . They are quite common in todays generation .
Might want to watch out i think this story was romantic ^
First of all how did you know what kind of kid he is? He could be smart, plus why would a kid say on tv that I’m smart or something like that?
Actually, speaking as one who did, many kids talk like this, although they are usually gifted in some way
look. I agree about the fact that the language used is a bit inaccurate but about the rest… I’m going to be honnest. Is creapypasta really the place to be realistic? I didn’t think so.
It is called fictional-not real-never could happen-writing, so yeah keep that in mind as you type what would never happen, it’s just a story for gods’ sake!
Actually tbh I think they should be, kinda like 17? Not That young, actually..
Smart kids talk like that.
i did when i was 4
If you’ve got a problem with it, keep it to yourself. This creepypasta is in the top 3 of best creepypasta (it’s acuatlly no.1) so I would shut up!
Honestly, Who cares about crap like that when it’s a fictional story? Very few on a statistical stand point. I don’t want to argue but I think it’s only fair to tell you that this story is only for entertainment purposes so I’m sure many would appreciate it if you wouldn’t take it so seriously. I don’t wish to argue but I did want to state my opinion so I won’t respond further if this turns into a huge argument.
I think you are wrong…so what if the way the child at the begining speaks,maybe he is more mature. My parents call my brother son and it is not forced, I think you are just one of those haters who want to hate for the sake of hating. How about YOU try to write a creepypasta and how about YOU try to deal with the hate. And Jeff’s hair could have been singed black,only if the fire didnt get deep into the roots then his hair would have “healed” which I bet the author was emplying. Maybe you should look at the pastas that have been writen that are actually bad, unllike this very well writen pasta which happens to be one of my personal favorites.
Finally someone gets it
Calm down dude it’s a story
It doesn’t have to be perfect, I really enjoyed it
This was a great story and I’d love to see you make one better! If you are going to make someone feel fucking horrible look in the mirror and ask yourself if you are in the right place to do so
Remember this is a twelve year old he’s going to try to spin smart
With the fighting bit you mentioned, my friends thirteen and he can fight like that because he’s been doing karate since he was 5 and he’s a black belt •~•
It was a great read, do I detect a little envy?
Not to start a fight but the kid might not use big words but mainly more grown-ups read the news and adults use big words so yeah that might be why. The adults would get shot causing them to fall to the ground tone injured or be killed remember, “Nobody move or guys go flying.” Liu survived and Jeff did it.because when you psycho your mind goes blank you have no love or no feelings. Jeff was not in the fire long enough (like Jane) to have his burned off. Jeff did not burn out his eyelids.
All the more reason that this story is creepy and weird but I love how it was written. You feel the dark atmosphere while reading the story.
i used those words when i was his age… is there a problem with that? (i agree with everything else though)
Yeah you’re so right
I completely agree although i do enjoy the entire plot of it, it took me a minute to fully find most of the mistakes you pointed out due to my mental auto-correct. but it was quite interesting to read.
Many wrong but still got scared af
Yes! Thank you! Someone finally said it! I get that this is a horror story site, but in terms of stories, this has to be the worst executed story I’ve ever had to read. Another thing that bugs me is the constant changes in tense! Seriously, before you try to create a story about a well known horror character, learn how to write one! You totally killed my interest in Jeff the Killer. Thanks. T_T
Not alot of it is plausible in my case. I see people get knives pulled on the all the time. And even i do it. And the adults either just dont care or think theyre wrestling. But the gun part was kinda rediculous. I do know one kid with a gun and i fight like that with people to
These stories are not supposed to be realistic. Stories like these are exaggerated to make them creepier. And so what if they were using formalities? It’s normal for a mom or dad to call his son, son. You might not see people use formalities, but that doesn’t mean that nobody in the world uses formalities all the time. And kids can use big words. Are you telling us that kids should stick to baby words and not learn to use big ones? And it is just a story. Obviously they wouldn’t be fighting like that in real life, but that’s what makes the story more interesting to read.
Well, it’s not supposed to be real. It’s just a story. But no, you had to make every little thing seem real. ITS A STORY
dude its just a story calm down
Well I mean it is the #1 creepypasta…
I will believe when I see it so far these stories are not scary to me
good
YES YOU ARE RIGHT AND WHY THE HELL 2 MATURED PEOPLE KILLED BY A KNIFE BY THEY OWN SON IF JEFF KILLED THEM WITH A GUN THATS STILL LOGICAL
And how the hell people get jeff’s HD face photo
My parents say things like that too. And once there was a kid who brought a gun to my school.
No matter the circumstances I absolutely loved this short story, those big words you used surprised me. I pictured everything in my mind perfectly, you are a really fine author
It’s a creepypasta. It doesn’t have to be even 80% real. If you don’t like it, mumble to yourself. Don’t complain about it here. No one wants to hear your whiny shit.
Look, you may think it’s impossible, but a kid with 13 years old can have a lot of grammar knowledge and use “hard” words, so please, these critics aren’t really useful to know a kid more… By Jeff’s actions he might be a sociopath, and sociopaths are used to being very inteligent.
I agree that it is somewhat cliché, but I believe that it still was a good creepypasta. (although a choice of words for the young kid in the beginning would be nice.)
Its still good though… this is a famous creepypasta and we all know the flaws but we are able to look past all that because its just really really good
I disagree. I was totally engulfed in that story from beginning to end. Awesome story from an awesome storyteller.
My friend, those are the elements that make the story scary and satisfying. I personaly felt bad for Jeff and Liu. Those bullies deserved to die. I would have done the same. Except the part where he turns into a killer and kills his entire family though. It may not be realistic, but it is still both moving and scary at the same time. My all time favourite.
I love jeff
Haters gon’ hate
if you didn’t like put a thumbs down and move on. i thought it was good it was interesting and cool so leave and don’t post