Please wait...

You’re Not Scared, Right?

Estimated reading time — 4 minutes

You are lying in your bed, the dull whirring of your air conditioner is the only thing separating you from total silence.

You know, that particular silence that is so heavy, and so thick, it’s almost the equivalent of a loud noise itself? The kind of silence where you could hear a pin drop three rooms away in; the kind of silence that fills your ears with the sound of your own heartbeat as your ear presses against your pillow. That kind of silence.

The dull whirring is the only noise you can hear, a noise that typically goes unnoticed, until it is the only noise present. It’s comforting, whether you realize it or not. A sort of white noise. But suddenly, your room is back at the temperature specified on the thermostat, and the whirring comes to a stop, as the vent makes a dull clang. To your misfortune, you are not yet asleep, and the silence sets in.

You should be comforted by the knowledge that you could hear anything and everything in your surroundings; making up for the lack of vision provided by the darkness. But you aren’t. It’s this very environment that sets you on edge, causes your heart to beat a bit faster, makes your body tense without explanation, and that makes you aware when you are not alone.

But you are alone right? You’ve been laying there with your eyes closed for almost 15 minutes now, and you made sure everything was normal in your room before you turned off the light; you’re a smart one. All those Facebook quizzes you took have just reinforced what you already know, if you were in a horror movie, you’d survive until the end. You’ve even made a carefully laid plan of what you would do in any of the situations you’ve read about on But that stuff is just nonsense anyway, right?

You aren’t scared. Or at least that’s what you keep telling yourself.

But wait…what was that? Was that the rustling of fabric? But, you didn’t shift in your bed, or make any movement. Did you make that noise? No, you couldn’t have. You’re paralyzed your bed, stiff with an unease that was not present until these very moments. You must have imagined it…you must have.

You roll over to face the wall. Out of sight, out of mind. If there’s something in the room with you, it will just have to accept that you are much to tired to deal with it at the moment. You’re still stricken with uneasiness as you hear rustling again. This time, the rustling is accompanied by a soft thud on the ground.

Your heart seizes in your chest…did you really just hear that? No no, you’ve just gotten yourself worked up about nothing. You really should stop play horror survival games so late at night, it’s messing with your brain. You’re a rational person, stop acting so childish and just fall asleep already.


You close your eyes tightly, silently hoping sleep would whisk you away soon. You’re practically begging for the safety of the nonexistent dreamworld of your own creation. You’re running away in a sense; but there’s nothing there…right? You’re just tired. I know, I know.


As your eyes are clinched tightly shut, you become aware that no matter how much you want to, you can no longer move your arms and legs. Come on now, are you really letting this get to you? What are you? 12 years old? Suck it up and fall asleep already.

Now, more tense than ever, that unnerving sound echoes across the room again. The rustling of fabric, followed by a soft thud on the ground. Unwittingly, you’re holding your breath now, eyes shut as tightly as possible. You have childish urge to pull the blanket over your head. You’re imagining it all! It’s all in your head; I thought you were better than this.

You heart is pounding loudly in your ears now, but not loudly enough to drown out the now repetitive sound approaching from across the room. What’s that rustling!? Maybe you left some paper on the ground. That has to be it! And that thumping? Probably the cat, or the dog, or something. They probably ran in when you weren’t looking before you closed your door. Yeah, you’re just paranoid.

The noise is now within a foot of your bed, and with your back to it, you don’t dare turn around to investigate, not that it’d do much good; the only light in your room is the dull glow of your cell phone on the nightstand next to you, you plugged it in before crawled into bed remember? But you don’t dare turn around and look; there’s nothing there anyway.

Minutes that feel like hours pass as you face your wall, stiff as a board, unable to will your uncooperative body to move. You haven’t heard the noises in a while now, not since it reached the edge of your bed. You know there’s nothing there you silly. It’s this silence. It’s messing with you. You really should have turned on some music or something before you went to bed. Oh well, maybe next time.


Suddenly, a familiar clang echoes through the room, followed by that familiar whirring. You exhale deeply, your body relaxing as you are flooded with relief. Thank God that’s over, now you can finally sleep in peace. That silence was really getting to you. You roll over and open your eyes to check the time on your lit cell phone, it must have been at least an hour since you first went to bed.

You are greeted face to face with his ear to ear grin. Dimly lit sockets where eyes once resided stare intently at you.

Ah, I see you’re still awake.

Credited to Shadow Lovely.

Please wait...

Copyright Statement: Unless explicitly stated, all stories published on are the property of (and under copyright to) their respective authors, and may not be narrated or performed under any circumstance.

230 thoughts on “You’re Not Scared, Right?”

  1. I know that I am over seven years too late, but if I may be so bold, I would suggest not to mention Creepypasta in any story on Creepypasta; it kind of ruined the seriousness of the story for me.

  2. This is proboly what we expect every time this happends… to see that grin, or the hand or possibly something crawled up in the corner

  3. Nice story, but this would never happen to me…I always sleep with the t.v on and usually pass out talking to friends online or reading stories on here, also I’m a pretty heavy sleeper (I actually slept through a tornado XD ) I’d end up getting killed and sleeping forever

  4. Story main character actions: Scream
    My actions if that happened to me: punch that thing in the face, run and jump out the window.

  5. ForeverMyMaster

    Why is everyone ignoring the fact that he mentioned creepypasta within a creepypasta. Which for me, broke the illusion. Terrible!

    1. I agree one hundred percent. I read that part and thought, “Well, I’m going to finish this story, but this line ruins it.”

  6. I actually read this while laying in my bed, and it scared the crap out of me. This is a very well put together story, and I like the way you ended it. No matter what the other people say, that puts the whole story to an end. It took me a minute to figure out that the person telling the story is the scary dude.

  7. im imagining a cheshire cat like laying in my bed when i check my phone for the time, i think if this happened to me i would start flailing then be paralyzed then probably notice its a talking cat or just a human with a big grin and then start up a conversation p.s. if hes not some psycho but i think if he was i would be dead before i could flail

  8. Well, I have no air conditioner, but between me and silence there are the neighbour’s voices, some neighbouring town or other regularly shooting fireworks for some reason or other, cars passing along the street, and of course my sister making all sort of noises at the oddest times, so mr. Smiley there can rustle and thud all he wants, I won’t hear.
    The start was good, the ending is lame. The silence really hasn’t much to do with the whole thing (good for atmosphere, but the thing would be there with or without silence), and a smiling someone who checks on me being awake is not that scary, except for the missing eyes (poor thing). After all, if it wanted to harm me why wait until the air conditioner started again?

  9. It did not help that the first and second times the “soft thuds on the floor” were mentioned, my mother dropped something in the other room.

    At least I think that was my mother.

  10. Guys, shut up, this was good. Not terrifying, but good. The whole point of the story is the antagonist is telling the protagonist whats happening to them. Its interesting, literature wise, and has good structure. Not to mention that its mostly well written, unlike 90% of the crappypasta floating around. So it didn’t make you piss yourself, its not the kind of story, the entire point is the suspense build up. Don’t be a prick just because you aren’t in to this particular type of horror.

  11. pfft one unexplained noise I might ignore, two I’d be whipped around with the light on already to see who the fuck was in my house

  12. I would have put the covers over my head and pretended nothing was there and just tried to go to sleep. I wouldn’t even peek until morning.

  13. Aside from turning around and having some monster staring me in the face this has happened way to many times before for this to not creepy me out.

  14. /Stares\ I have a dog in my bedroom, a billon pillows and never open my eyes until I turn on light and sound in my room.

    Also I wrote a better story… Heh.

  15. am i the only one who thinks that…thing could be friendly? i mean just because it looks freaky and approached the bed in a creepy manner doesnt necessarily evil now…does it?

  16. Contrary to most of the comments here already, I thought the ending was just right. The buildup was so descriptive and intense that if the author had ended it with as much detail as the buildup… Well, it would have watered down the effect. It’s supposed to catch you off guard, like the last not in a punk song.

  17. BohemianRhapsody

    “What are you? Twelve years old?” Ironically, yes. I imagined that as, “What are you, five?” to make it fit better. This is a pretty good pasta! (Way better than the last one. -.-“)

  18. I really enjoyed this. I disliked the second person point of view and the ending, but everything else was pretty much perfect. 10/10.

  19. Ah, now THAT pasta was delicious. I’m full, but I think I’ll just eat it one more time…

    I might leave the last bit left on the plate, though. It was a little burned.

  20. I really liked this one! The end could have been better, but it was still good,8/10. Oh, and in the response to one of the other comments I’m 12 and reading these… Not much to it.

  21. I like it! Thanks for getting into my head so well; vague enough to cover most people who read these things wile still making a connection to the person. Its dawn here, the world is waking up, the sun is getting brighter and I’m posting a comment so I don’t have to try so hard to ignore the sounds outside my bedroom door…

  22. Gotta say, I definitely love this story. Gives you a nice buildup and then the ending made me laugh- Which is a good thing, because I was anticipating somesuch at the end and overall, I really did enjoy this story. So great job!

    Note: I tried this for the first time and got an ‘invalid /secutiry/ code’. Just an FYI

  23. Gotta say, I definitely love this story. Gives you a nice buildup and then the ending made me laugh- Which is a good thing, because I was anticipating somesuch at the end and overall, I really did enjoy this story. So great job!

  24. Wow…well done, mate. How the syntax becomes shorter and faster to build the tension, the conflicting feelings and thoughts, the realism, it’s all marvelous.

  25. That gave me shivers :/ Wow, good pasta! Liked the ending, something about an unknown thing standing in the dark grinning and watching you really freaks me out…

  26. Holy fuck that scared the crap out of me because I relate to the character so much and I was all oh thank God no more silence then I read the last sentence and I almost shit my pants. Great pasta!

  27. I ain't telling u!

    I don’t understand the ending, are you, the author, a stalker talking to me while I’m trying to fucking sleep?

  28. You guys are so quick to critique something without giving it too much thought. I really enjoyed this story. Mainly because i read it on my iphone in my room at 12 am. The fucked up thing is that i was facing the wall the whole time. And when i read “his ear to ear grin” i just imagined smiledog/smile.jpeg staring at the back of my head. It took a lot of courage for me to turn ar

  29. hate it when my ex stalks me like that too. must remember to change locks. and change boxers. and sheets. not my fault she wore that clown mask in the damn single ladies video. told her to wear contacts, but no she had to head-butt the damn television with her face. now she looks like pug dog. oops. accidentally insulted pug dog.

  30. I would\’ve wrote

    \"You are greeted face to face with his ear to ear grin. Dimly lit sockets where eyes once resided stare intently at you.

    It\’s mouth begins to mouth disgustingly, as you see black blood pop from the lumps on it\’s lips, and it begins to say \"Ohaider\".\"

  31. tylyngonaeatchu

    hahahaha XD damn you creepypasta for knowing what im thinking.

    no lie i felt like this last night when i couldnt get to bed. it was SO frustrating!

  32. Also, the description of the face reminds me of the Cheshire Cat.

    Also also: Creepy Pasta needs an edit button.

  33. Stop thinking of it as a literal story and more of a description of your nightly routine. Think: You finish reading a bunch of scary stories and when you get to bed you do this exact same thing, except when you roll over, you don’t open your eyes. This is basically like what would happen if in that moment you feel like you shouldn’t open your eyes for ANYTHING, you do.

  34. pheonomenal, i think absolutley great. my heart began racing and i imagines it at all perfectly. i think im sleeping with some music on tonight… maybe the tv…

  35. The style of writing, especially in second person, was utterly horrendous. The story itself had mounds of potential–great build up. The ending was lacking. 4/10

  36. It started out great. I live in an apartment, my air-conditioner helps me sleep(until it turns off), I love survival horror games, and my bed is up against a wall(and when it’s quite I feel as if there is something there). But it kept going on and on, and by then the creepy faded away, which made the end so boring. Ha ha ha you’re the creepy person on the side of my bed making noise.


  37. Holy. Shit. xD

    Win pasta was win.

    The reason it got me so freaked out is that this is what ALWAYS happens to me before I fall asleep. I get so paranoid in the dark, I swear my mind is messing with me >_> And I usually turn to the wall to avoid staring at the mirror. xD

    I will need a night-light from now on.


  39. Doesn’t anyone check their own writing anymore?

    We need a rating system too…honestly… *rolls eyes*

    Where do I start? Oh yes, since when do we say to people “you silly”. Hint, its usually accompanied with billy…lol
    This story wasn’t creepy nor fun to read aloud, the only good part was the last final sentence/s. May I add that even the last sentence/s could have been better described.

  40. well, i liked it. the ending, not as scary as the intro/build up makes it to be. i got to say, though, the build up was wonderful. i get like that all the time when i’m scared, minus the smiling guy at the end, lol. not bad, though. :]

  41. Oh.. my… god. i have had that feeling before many times in my room, and if i actually did come face to face with something, im pretty sure id piss myself. when im THAT freaked out, if something were to even go “BOO” id start crying ={

  42. This is the first scary story in a while that’s been able to scare me. And its mostly because that something similar to this has happened to me before. Y’know, minus the freaky thing at the end. I hate that silence at night when not even the air conditioner is on, and you can hear every last creak the house makes. Oooh, it makes me shiver!

  43. The pasta was fine! The ending was good, everyone could relate to this because it was realistic. The build up was good and the ending did’nt dissapoint me at all :)
    Generally, nice pasta.


  45. Lawl I have this experience many times except for the part with the dude sitting by my bed. What I do if I think there is something by my bed is I lay there stiff until I can build up the courage to flail a kick or punch in its direction so that if there is something there I can get a good cheap shot in before it mauls me.

  46. Fantastic build up! I have actually been in this sort of situation. I’m pretty sure I’ve even said some of these things in my head: “damn, I need to not read creepypasta at 3am, and playing zombie video games is not helping, etc, etc” but (as the OP has already admitted): it’s a damn letdown at the end. Up until then, I was thinking ‘Shit, they’ve been watching me.’

    Good start, just don’t rush yourself at the end! Keep up the great work though, it’s nice to see talented pasta chefs come through!


  47. I admire the way the writer managed to describe the tension building up when you start imagining things and just can’t stop, that fear you feel while watching horror movies alone or when you bring yourself to imagine scary things in the dark to the point that you feel like you’re going to faint. The sarcastic narration is a bit unnerving at times, and the final is pretty dumb, but appropriated. Plus, i shat brucks when i saw the skulls from the previous story. This’ll teach me to scroll down so quickly.

  48. The “monster” or whatever at the end being well-spoken is kind of comforting, actually.
    It’s like, “WHOA I WAS JUST HORRIFIED FOR ABOUT FOREVER THERE but you’ve got nice manners so it’s all good, holmes.”

  49. That was pretty good, but If my ass rolled over to eyeball-less man, hed receive a nice crack to the face. Don’t sneak up on a crazy white boy while hes tryin to sleep lol.

  50. Charlotte Mander

    I rather enjoyed this pasta. Very realistic.

    The ending was excellent. Just the sort of twist this story needed.

    The imagery was lovely. I am glad to have read it.

    –Char Mander

  51. I see the war has stopped. Bravo Violent Harvest for being the Mature one… LOL niether of you are mature for doing this in the first place. Why don’t YOU go butcher your meat. ::crosses arms dramaticly::

  52. A art of the creepypasta is all about a build-up to an expected, yet unexpected ending. The sentence structure seemed awkward at times; however, the ending to this was fucking beautiful. Nice build-up (even with its grammatical and parsing blemishes) and an ending that made me shudder. Something about the delineation of a wide grin gets to me.

  53. This is so fucking bad. I read “But, you didn’t shit in your bed, or make any movement…”

    This is pretty much a Tl;dr of BUT GUESS WHAT I AM A DEAD SKULL!

  54. @l!zz!e
    Nah, im just kidding. I’m a guy, my penis iz pretty small but i’m still a guy. Yeah I remeber seeing u too! And we do know each other!!!!! I just wanted to let u know that ur a cunt whore bitch. You really piss me the fuck off, so get on ur kneez and suck it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  55. @l!zz!e

    … i’m the real Shadow Lovely….and i’m a she…..e_e. I go by the pseudonym Slenderman because of a running joke here on Creepypasta…
    ….honestly…does Shadow lovely sound like a male name? …I appreciate that you like my story…but I don’t know you, I’m not a male, and I don’t see you every day…
    but…thank you ._.

    @ Cold Doll

    Thank you so much for the critique!

  56. LOL! Computer high five JustHere!!! You so totally got Volent Harvest! That hypocrite. Also, now he knows how it feels when someone makes A TYPO. Everyone does occasionaly, make them, don’t we? We ARE only human after all. Also, please stop the computer wars, Mashuhm is poning Violent Harvest as he attempts to pone back, the insults get more intense! Fairley soon, you’ll both be banned, or something along the lines of that. So stop!!!! Once, again, computer highfive JustHere. Peace ‘m out!


    Holy Shizz, I know you! Holy Shizz you read me this! Holy Shizz, I love it! And the last comment was directed at the IMPOSTER!

    Loves you Shadow!

  58. @ Shadow Lovely

    You are an idiot. I know the author of this Pasta fucking personally. I see him everyday, and he is brilliant! You don’t know him. Leave him and his fucking art ay-fucking lone!

  59. Why is everyone so cruel to this story? I honestly thought it was rather good. I did notice the occasional grammar and spelling mistake, but just because something isn’t completely perfect, doesn’t mean it’s terrible. Also, the idea of it was terrific, and I liked the theme and such of it. I liked how it was of someone going to sleep and having that uneasy feeling many get when they can’t sleep and the silence gets to them and makes them paranoid. How the story was told also isn’t terrible, it was whatever the thing was telling of you (not necessarily you of course, but of someone going to bed, just saying you because many people can relate to this story’s feeling the the person ‘you’ gets) trying to get to bed, think that your asleep because you hadn’t moved, so when you turned and faced it, it simply though and / or said, “Ah, I see your still awake”

    Really, it’s not bad at all. The ending wasn’t weak either, I found it likable. It reminded me of some creature from the old horror stories I use to be told as a child. To the people who are flat out being rude to the story, creator, or other commenters, it’s not nice. I understand your voicing your opinion, but maybe be a bit nicer about it? Hm?

    I’d give it eight out of ten stars for thought, creativity, and story line. Grammar and spelling could have been improved, but overall I enjoyed reading this. Well, I wish you all a lovely day / afternoon / night for today and tomorrow, good bye.

  60. “I love the people who constantly “judge” pasta like it’s a job, and yet they haven’t even wrote one good one. Mighty Aspergers in here.”

    Hey. Don’t insult us Aspergers nuts. We’d never stoop so low as to act like these retards.

  61. @ Imposter Shadow Lovely

    xD way to be an idiot.

    a) demoman this is what? the 9th time you’ve commented on this? good job buddy. good job.

    b) again, thank you for proving that you in fact, have no life at all outside of being a troll.

    and let’s not forget…

    c) actually, I don’t need a c. You pretty much make an idiot of yourself without my help, now don’t you?

  62. This here deserves a bit more of explanation.

    The build up is awesome. It’s a nicely written second-person pasta, it really achieves to chill your bones from inside your mind… well, it did for me, at the very least. I don’t sleep in a room with air conditioner, but for the rest, the chills and mind sommersaults executed when an unknown sound or light shifts in your range of sight or hearing… it’s awesome.

    The ending, though, is completely anti-climax. Two cliches for the price of one: the good ol’ “something there that wasn’t just a few moments ago, or so you thought”, coupled with the even older “creepy smile and creepy empty eyesockets creature”. The sudden shift to first person, with all it implies, did very little to placate my disappointment.

    Huh, look at me, I even SOUND as a critic, eh? Let’s make a TL;DR version of this then:

    From start to end: awesome and chilling. Ending was dull and cliché. Seriously, should be worked better.

    That’s all for now. Mole out.

  63. Ignore the trolls, mate, this was amazingly effective stuff for a pasta. The build-up was great – felt very real. The ending WAS a teense anti-climatic – the monster just sounded a bit too normal – but it was still a very potent effort. Nice work.

  64. Made me go “Eeeek” at the end
    Not actually scared, but i can relate to almost all the noises of the story,whats scary ;_;
    Can someone come over and sleep with me toni- WAIT FORGET IT

  65. Agreeing with many above posters: Started off awesome, ending was lame. Like backwash in a bottle of champagne.

    Also, WHO WAS GRIN??//??!1! Durrhurrhurr

  66. Lol, Violent Harvest, I’ve been reading some, key word SOME of the comments. I would read them all, but some are so tired that it literally hurts your eyes to read them. No offense, but apparently a lot, and I mean, A LOT, of people hate you. You might want to change that before you get a knife stabbed in your back. ;)

  67. Oooh, Violent Harvest, your ego hurt a little bit? I thought so, and I don’t care what you say, my main purpose there with that comment was to hurt your ego and show you the truth. Very easily done, I mean, your ego is rather large, and I don’t lie, So it would be pathetic if someone couldn’t do those two things to a person like you. Also, the reason, you wrote better things on grade two is because of all those years you had to stay back and repeat it because, even as a 10 year old, little children the age of seven could still riun you into the ground with their superior knowledge. Speaking of seven, I think of it as a victory that, although you think you’re better than everyone else, at least I can pronounce words that have over seven letters, unlike you. Maybe you wanna rethink picking on someone like me, I don’t give in that easy. ;)

  68. You are an amazing writer, near the end I felt like you were just imagining the whole thing. Then, suddenly the person at the end comes. Freaky yet awesome.

  69. If this hadn’t dragged on for such a mind-numbingly long time, it would’ve been a pretty great pasta. I think you set it up for too long and didn’t focus on the shocking end too much.

    That, and the whole the-narrator-is-the-monster thing is so old and tired.

  70. @Gingersaur if I’m not funny why have I made rent just writing for Cracked? :D

    I don’t “rage” about anything. I am entertained that people are simple-minded enough that they furiously complain about what gets posted to and demand “better” each and every single time.

  71. Wait, so Death/The Grim Reaper is a total jerk?

    Not only does he harvest your soul, he also sneaks up on people at night, before he reaps?


  72. @Bogleech. You’re not funny. And theres no need to rage about someones opinion. Kthanxbai.

    Anyway, I guess this pasta was okay. I’ve had better though.
    I’ll give it one nom.

  73. This story is alot scarier if you change the second to last sentence (about the eyes) to read, “You can smell the whiskey on your stepfather’s breath as he breaks into a smile.” Follow that shit up with “Ah, I see you’re still awake.” And you’d have a non-paranormal twist that no one would see coming. Plus it’d be really creepy.

  74. I would have to agree with Mr. Bogleech. If it’s so freaking miserable for you to read a one paragraph, all caps-lock ownage pasta, you shouldn’t be here. Go to Ichor Falls and beat your meat or something.

  75. Mashum:

    You just butchered the English language worse than I could ever do with anything, ever. I mean, I wrote better things that what you just wrote when I was in second grade. To help you out, it’s “hypocrite.” I’ll stop there.

  76. Holy shit that scared me. I thought it was pretty good. Who hasn’t been in a situation like that, minus the actual threat?

    I thought it was good; I hope you keep writing.

  77. @Bogleech
    I agree. The dead skull wuz the scariest stroy i eva read.
    I would masturbate to it everyday, it wuz by far da best pasta.
    So haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.
    And to my HUGE fan girls who think im sexy….thnx

    sincerly demoman
    (the guy who wrote candle cove, suicide mouse, and created dis website all together.)

  78. @Mr. Uno – I wrote the dead skull and I think it’s cute and you don’t get it because you’re a weenie. I’m afraid I can’t be banned, since I’m waaaay higher up the ladder here than you are.

    Didn’t you say you were “giving up” and not coming back anymore? What, was the WAHHHHHHMBULANCE full? Surely they had room for one more.


  79. Didn’t impress me, but as of late I’ve found very few that do.
    It wasn’t even the grammatical errors, or the fact that it was rushed – well thought out, eloquently worded pastas have also failed to make any impact on me. It just seemed done, felt as if I had read it before. There wasn’t really a spark of originality. Forgive me if I sound pratty, I do encourage you to continue to improve your writing, Shadow Lovely.

  80. IT SUCKED BLACK NEGRO DICKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    No offence. But it really wuz not that erotic. I only got 3 boners from it and thats it. :(
    But when I seen demoman it gave me like 50000000000 boners.
    He’s so sexy and he gets all the girls. Also he can bench like 394287y592759085 pounds. Thats how kewl he iz.

  81. FINALLY, NEW PASTA! However, i find it odd how new pasta can be so damn familiar…maybe its cause i’ve read to same thing about a million times. Still, it was a good buildup which was utterly let down by the ending. I think it would have been better if when he looked nothing was there looks back at the wall and the face is actually IN the wall, you know, like he was face to face with it the whole time, one of those “OH SHI-” moments.. Possessed house trumps generic scary thing any day.

  82. Not bad, but a bit repetitive. Every paragraph was pretty much “OMG it’s dark and there’s a scary noise, but it’s probably nothing”. If it had been shortened down a lot, it probably would have had more impact. I got kind of bored reading the same thing over and over.
    Ending is pretty weak, but it gave me a little scare anyway.
    Still the best pasta in a while.

  83. Violent Harvest, you really suck. I would like you all to know that I am fine with movies and stories. They din’t scare me, although, that is sort of a pitty. Takes the fun out of it…

    Also, I was trying to get my point across okay! I am immune to these sort of things, and so it didn’t make my heart beat faster, although I said that. As well as the fact that this Pasta makes you think a little, which always gives more points on my scale, HAVE YOU SEEN THE OTHER PASTAS POSTED RECENTLY? They are terrible I say, terrible! So there.

    3 more things. 1: No one answered my question, what WOULD a 12 year old to if they read this?
    2: I want so badly to correct the grammar mistakes in this story.
    3: Violent Harvest, I’ve read your stories, your comments. I have one thing to say about them, utterly terrible. Your stories disgusted me, I hated them with a passion, your comments tired, mean, and once again, disgusting. So don’t mimick, don’t be so mean. You ARE, of course, being the hated hipicrit right now. Itiot.

  84. OP Here aka Shadow Lovely.

    Thanks everyone for the constructive criticism, positive and negative. This is my first pasta, and the ending, I will admit: was totally rushed. Sorry.

    Just to clarify what I was trying to do with the narrative…it’s not really supposed to be like one of those ritualpastas where you are being told what to do…it’s really supposed to be a fake-out sort of thing where you think it’s you talking to yourself in your own head, but dun dun dun….it’s not.

    Anyway, no, this has nothing to do with the DEAD SKULL, in fact, it was the furthest thing from my mind when I wrote it. BUT I do see the connection LOL I think it’s hilarious. Perhaps the author of THE DEAD SKULL now owes me royalties ¬¬

    Anyway, keep the critique coming! I want to improve!

  85. I liked it for the sole fact that I go through this same routine sometimes. Lying in bed, eyes tightly closed. Heart pounding at what may wait in the darkness.

  86. The Rake (Slendy's Wifey)

    This is one of the best pastas I’ve ever read! I love it because I’ve had times where I think someone is in the room with me, but was to afraid to roll over and look. I give it a 10/10. Excelent pasta! Nom nom nom.

    But I have to ask…


  87. Second person doesn’t do it for me. I wouldn’t respond or act in the way this protagonist did. I don’t think I’ve ever actually read something in 2nd person narrative that even made me a feel a slight hint of emotion. This pasta was set up to fail before the first sentence was complete IMO.

  88. Ugh, I hate narratives that tell me what I’m doing or thinking. It’s like, don’t tell me that I’m scared of thumps in the night, because I’m not. For all you know, I’d eat that nightmonster and his kids for dinner.

  89. uh lestat do u mean a B-?
    and this pasta was horrible and whoever invented ‘the dead skull’ shuld b banned from creepypasta along with whoever writes a pasta about it. although shadow lovely is a cool name

  90. I love the people who constantly “judge” pasta like it’s a job, and yet they haven’t even wrote one good one. Mighty Aspergers in here.

  91. Ugh, not scary at all. We already have a ton of pastas with the “alone in the dark and scared of every little noise” theme. And the “OMG! Something really is out there and it’s now right on top of me” ending is getting bland too.

  92. Why can all my friends write but me -_-
    Anyways~ That was awesome. I also do that in my sleep I think about all those noises and I spazz out inside my head. I understand the ending was rushed haha.
    Overall it was really good tho.

  93. The Rake (Slendy's Wifey)

    That was one of the best pastas I’ve ever seen! Srsly, I loved it! I give it a 10/10 because I’ve had the same things happen to me (only I didn’t roll over to see a face, haha I kept my eyes shut).

    But I have to ask…


    1. BEST CREPPY PASTA UMM? “Jeff The Killer, Slenderman witch he dosent really have a story behind,Laughing Jack,ben drowned.

  94. Hell of a lot better than the last couple pastas. Well above average use of atmosphere, with only occasional hints of language repetition.

    Ending was a bit flat though. I like the way you tried for a slightly understated end instead of something more generic, but it didn’t quite make it.

  95. I liked it. The ending’s been done, yes, and it wasn’t a particularly strong way to stop the story, but the build up was nice enough that it made me jump although I knew what was coming.

    Not a masterpiece, but much better than anything that’s been on the site as of late.

  96. “You guys have to consider the fact that it has been the best Pasta in a long time. It actualy makes your heart beat faster! Why? Because it makes you think, that’s why. And it’s in that sort of enviroment so.. also, what if someone reads this and they actually are 12… hmmm.”

    Except it didn’t make my heart beat faster, and the ending was terrible. Cliche at best, sub-par at worst. At least it was something to read besides a meme.

  97. Terrible. Complete and utter shit.
    The antagonist lacks any sort of description, and his intentions are unclear at best. “Thud thud thud also you cant move lol” isn’t a good formula for a scary pasta.
    Literature is not your niche.

    1. If you paid attention the story, it was in second person narrative. Which means(get this!), the whole story is being told as if it’s happening to YOU.
      “You have childish urge to pull the blanket over your head. You’re imagining it all! It’s all in your head; I thought you were better than this.” This is the narrator telling you what’s happening to you.
      YOU’RE the antagonist. The narrator can’t tell you what you look like, or how you act, because it’s written for EVERYONE the relate to you.
      The being unable to move is actually known as being “paralyzed with fear”. It’s when your muscles contract and strain as your brain attempts to process the situation going on.
      Sure, it might be a little cliche, but the pasta has a pretty good recipe, it just needs a few things here and there to expand it and make it a little better. Clearly, your taste buds are corrupted and so is your knowledge.

        1. No, the story’s being told by the antagonist a he approaches the protagonist’s bed. “Ahh, I see you’re awake”

        2. Your all bucking idiots. Except Casey. The story is obviously told from the perspective of the person in bed. “You rollover to face the wall”, “Your heart seizes in your chest”, and the most obvious, “You are greeted face to face with his ear to ear grin”. Don’t think it makes sense for your horrified prey to greet you with a smile. They should have really added quotations around his words, if they were said, and if they weren’t, the author should have made it clear this was the killers thought.

  98. You guys have to consider the fact that it has been the best Pasta in a long time. It actualy makes your heart beat faster! Why? Because it makes you think, that’s why. And it’s in that sort of enviroment so.. also, what if someone reads this and they actually are 12… hmmm.

    1. I was in bed when i clicked on the connection. It was silent, hot. I started to read and i have dreaded the main character was me. I was scared and… I have realized on reading this “What are you? 12 years old?”, i’m 13… I turned on all the lights and i have closed the door. “Now, i’m not scared” i have thought.
      But at the end of the text,i have make an error: i looked at the door whence the sound of footsteps come… A hand rested on the handle…
      My mother entered in my room and said “Ah, I see you’re still awake.”

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published.

Scroll to Top