It was past midnight now, and I still had a while until I met my destination. The girl I picked up an hour ago was asleep in the seat beside me. She was a hitchhiker. I couldn’t leave a teenager alone at night in the pouring rain, I had to pick her up. She seemed pretty happy that someone was finally giving her a ride.
I didn’t know her real name, only that her friends call her “Jo.” She looked so calm, so peaceful. Her brown hair obscured half her gorgeous face, her lips flexed in a barely noticeable smile. She must be having a nice dream.
I tried to remember the last dream I had, but had no luck. Then, I felt it; a feeling I hadn’t felt in a long time. A terrible, ugly feeling. I looked down at the girl as I drove, hoping her smiling face might help me overcome and not give in to the demon within… but I could feel it clawing to get out.
I didn’t want to. I couldn’t. I needed to get the girl out of the car, but that would take too long. It would happen before then.
I continued to struggle, fighting an inner battle. Then… No. I couldn’t contain it. It happened: I let out the most monstrous fart I’d ever released. It was legendary. It was the kind of thing kids would tell stories about to scare younger kids.
I reluctantly looked to see if the beast that escaped my body had woken the girl. It hadn’t, but the smile had faded and she looked to be having a nightmare now.
Credit: Jordan D.
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I didnt read that this was a parodypasta
So when i read the ending i was like
Wtf!?! ?
BUUUURRRRRRRIIIIIIIIIITTTTTTTOOOOOO!!!!
BUT WHO WUS FART?!
This is one of the most funniest story I’ve ever read ???
I don’t get how this is scary
Hahaha! Best story ever!!.
ROFL I WAS LAUGHING SO HARD WHEN I READ THAT XD
After reading so many of these faux pastas, it gets a little disappointing figuring out that it’s not meant to be taken seriously. This kind of thing has been done many, many times, so it’s definitely starting to lose its effect. This wouldn’t bother me, except they are always rated so well that they are practically unavoidable. All I’m saying is that this kind of unoriginal pasta just doesn’t deserve the “9” rating to match that of Michael Whitehouse or Vincent Venecava.
nice
All that build up for a fart.
this is the best story i have ever read.
Omg I showed my mom and dad butt, as soon as I said farted my daddy farted 3 times
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA XDDD
Dying xD :-) nearly farted while reading
In class and I think trying not to laugh was the hardest thing I’d ever done XD
Lmaoo! Holy shit didnt see that one coming!
Omg I was in English class and someone let one rip. Let’s just say they were surrounded by girls and half of the room moved over just to get away. This story was amazing. I may or may not have cried a little. 10/10.
Real intense shit man xD lmao
It was legendary had me lmao
SCARIER THAN SLENDERMAN
That will give me nightmares for years to come… How dare you scar me mentally man! How dare you!
Holy shit! HAHAHAHA!!!
Indont understand
I wasn’t expecting that…it was HILARIOUS though.Awesome story.
LOL
“I let out the most monstrous fart I’d ever released. It was legendary. It was the kind of thing kids would tell stories about to scare younger kids.”
LOL!!
Thoroughly enjoyed this pasta! What do you put in this sauce?
-Herobrine
Always watching…
(and LOLing)
I was right in the middle of claas when i read this!!I started laughing so hard my teach sent me out to calm down!! xD thanks for making this! :D
This happens to me very day. But I don’t call a demon. I call it the KRAKON
Worlds. Oddest. Parodypasta
Great!!! This was fuckin funnnee!!
Awesome! SO lovin’ this story!
You forgot the tag “Based on a True Story”. The fact that she didn’t wake up, though, must not have been that terrible. I’ve heard of farts that can wake the dead
It could possibly have been so bad that it forced her deeper into unconsciousness. Like a bad case of knockout gas. The question to ponder on though would be on how long it lingered in the air.
At first I was kinda upset cause this wasn’t exactly horror but now that I think about it I loved this story and the setup was great!
Hahaha that was so unexpected
the demon within. MEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHehhhhh… weird, but awesome.
lol. plz write more! if my mom weren’t doing phone calls, id be laughing the office apart. I truthfully thought he was going to turn into a werewolf or something. the ending was awesome. lol. XD
really?
write MORE. lolz, that was hilarious! I totally thought he was going to turn into a werewolf. I would have had a nightmare too. Both my dad and my step-dad have monstrous farts. I feel sorry for the hitchhiker. wonder if that’s actually happened before? -.+
“Oh,he’s gonna kill her…. what xD?!” This story was great.
I was freaking out SO BAD I thought he was going to like brutally rape her or something!! OMFG XD 10/10
omg i cannot stahp laughing
I can’t stop laughing!!! This killed me!!! XD
Boyah.
hahahaha!!!!
At first, I was intrigued by this story… and I was expecting there to be a lot of gore and so on.
But then I read “I let out the most monsterous fart” and I was just like “you. have. got. to. be. kidding. me!” And for the next 10 minutes I was laughing hard enough that I had to cry.
-10/10 voted
LOL BEST PASTA EVER XD
Most random thing i have ever read.
………
._.
Most random thing i have ever read.
………
._.
……………….
This was beautiful
OMG I almost DIED of laughter! My brother almost did too.
Lmao! Was not expecting that. I thought something demonic/pedo-like was gonna come out of him and towards the girl. That ending was so much better though. Just priceless. XD
………….wtf?!?! it was funny
This was so fucking HILARIOUS!!! I honestly can say I did not expect this!!!
Ehh…I was acctually oh I don’t know? looking for horror :/
Thank you author, I just laughed myself to tears
…
AHA!
LOOOOOOL!!!!!!!!
Loooooooooooool best story Ever
YOLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! *proceeds to explode with laughter*
Bravo!
thrilling. shocking. FIND A PUBLISHER, MAN!
i laughed so hard i got abs after
how is that possible?
Simply amazing.
xD i thought at first it was going to be something…u know but omg that twist was awesome
That was the scariest thing I have ever read.
Trying not to LOL ….
10/10 scariest pasta yet well done
LMFAO
BEST STORY EVAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR!!!!!!!!!!!!
———————————————————————————————————————-
Ahh, that was beautiful! It sounded like he was going to be a paedophile to me 0.o
That’s where I thought that was going too…
Where did it say the hitchhiker was a child?
Probably the greatest story I have read in a long time. I want to read more!!!!!
*dies of laughter*
That was so funny, I can’t breathe, oh my God!!
Best story ever!
You funny bugger
Thought I had finally found a short and yummy pasta. Entertained yet dissapointed. :|smh
Hahahahaha nice build up xD
Magical shit is everywhere these days.
yeah
LOL. That was amazing, did not expect it at all.
that made my day hahaha.
He should’ve done it out the window.
And it would be funnier in all caps and like *over 9000* grammar mistakes
I laughed so hard I farted! Then my cubicle partner about shot soda out his nose afe=ter I farted.
That just made me laugh!
While i was reading the last few sentences, my little brother who i share a room with ripped one in his sleep. let me just say: 4 year old children, should not wake up a baby and evacuate a room with one single fart.
Omfg lol you just made my day
lol
HAHAHAHA
I started reading it expecting him to turn into something like a werewolf (since it was night time). The twist was original (to my knowledge) and humorous. Lol!
i LOL every where know i have a mess to clean up
lol just like me that happens to me all the time
Delicious Pasta!
Are you sure ‘delicious’ is the right word??
Oh man, here I was waiting for the typical PSA against hitchhiking, great comic relief!
This is fucking hilarious haha
This is totally my friend Ethan. His farts are sentient.
“Friend” Curse your damned friend zone!
LOOOOL!!!
Ikr! I was like dafuq?
Oh god, I am crying. Best story EVER!
Me too X3 HAHAHAHAHA
Add me to the list. This is so stupid, I couldn’t stop laughing.
I did this yesterday to my date – unintentionally. Forever alone level 9000… :(
ITS OVER 9000!!!!
Sorry bro
Your not forever alone your forever available