Out With A Bang
I’ve decided to kill myself.
I think it’s important someone understand why, so I’m making this video before I blow my head off. The first time I remember it happening I was nine. Johnny Weller and I were playing in his back yard. The sun was setting over his back fence, warm oranges and reds shining through the bone-white slats like a creamsicle against pearly white teeth. Johnny was the cowboy and I was the dirty redskin, stealing his horse. We ran around the swingset, him laughing and me whooping and threatening to scalp him. When he tripped, I ran to where he laid in the dirt, scooping up a handful of air, pointing my finger at his nose and proclaimed, “I got your gun now! BANG!”
Johnny’s head exploded in a tremendous blossom of crimson blood, slate-gray brain and chips of skull that sparkled in the setting sun. My hand fell to my side, and I stared, open-mouthed, unable to understand what just happened. Someone was screaming. At first I thought it must be Johnny’s mother, until she tore open the back door and I realized I was the one screaming. Johnny’s mother crumpled against her son’s headless body, adding her broken sobs to my horrified cries.
Johnny’s funeral was the next week, closed casket. I forgot the sparkling light shimmering across the cloud of Johnny’s blood. I forgot Johnny’s mother rag-dolling my little body, begging me to tell her what happened to her son. I forgot the sherrif telling my mother Johnny was hit by a falling bullet, one of twenty six cases each year. I forgot my father’s quiet talks with my mother about how they never found the round that spattered Johnny’s smile across the grass. I adjusted. I coped. I forgot.
I didn’t forget the next time it happened. I never played cowboys and indians again; in fact, I can’t remember a single instance of any shooting game played by little boys anywhere in my childhood. I do remember the little girl in the park, pop pop popping her little nerf balls as she bounced around. She ran up to me, brandishing the weapon and shouting, “Hands up!”
I smiled and complied, dropping my sandwich in mock terror. I lifted my hands to the sky and petitioned for mercy. A true homicidal maniac in the making, she executed me with a flurry of staccato pop pop pops. I dutifully played dead, sprawling across my bench. She giggled and proclaimed, “Your turn. Shoot me!”
A sudden sensation of intense discomfort slithered up my spine. I thought of flowers, glittering crimson roses, wet with morning dew. She eyed me impatiently, apparently convinced she might have to nerf me once more to provoke a response. I lifted my finger weakly, pointed at her and whispered, “Bang.”
This time I wasn’t the one screaming. Her mother cradled her baby’s dismembered limbs, frantically clutching an arm, then a leg. I had pointed my finger at the little girl’s belly button. The moment the word left my lips, she ruptured like a water balloon filled with punch and soaking bits of crimson colored fruit. Johnny Weller’s decapitated body filled my vision, the slow red of sunset sliding down the front of his striped shirt. I ran.
I can’t do this anymore. I got pissed at Laura yesterday and put my finger in her face to tell her off. I didn’t even say it. I couldn’t bring myself to sop my girlfriend’s brains off the kitchen floor. I can’t do this anymore.
All I have to do is put my finger against my temple and say it.
At least I’ll go out with a bang.
–
Credited to Myth.
THEN WHO WAS SKY BULLET?!
Not creepy in the slightest, but this story is amazingly well written, it’s descriptions so amazing and vibrant that I could see it all play out in my mind’s eye in vivid detail. The subject matter is fucking fantastic. Wonderful story. Wonderful!
POW
HAHA
Awesome, awesome idea. Unfortunately the story’s structure isn’t too good. It feels like a chunk was missing out of the beginning.
Still, love it.
Great concept, wish it was longer, reminds me of the Borderlands cover.
Good story….not creepy ..more sad than anything else….but very well written….
SEE YOU, SPACE COWBOY
I love this.
Pretty damn good.
Cool idea, decent writing. Couldn’t help but think of Cowboy Bebop….
what a pussy. I’d either go on a rampage or become a crime fighter if I had a magnum finger way before I killed myself
Not creepy at all, but pretty good. Well done, I liked it.
Not really creepy, but that doesn’t stop it from being fucking awesome.
then how did he order kun pow chicken XD he could have been the best assasin….
Man I hate it when people use stopping power.
This was probably one of the best short stories I have ever read, although I wouldn’t really call it creepypasta, more of a paranormal story than anything. I really, really wish it had been long, I may have to re-write this for my own pleasure.
All in all, amazing story, this is the first time a story was good neough to get me to comment.
11/10
HEAVY IS COMMITTING SUICIDE?
Excellent story. I agree, not creepy. More like “Twilight Zone from Hell”
Yeah agree not creepy, but a very fun story to read. Is it a blessing or a curse?
predictable, as is usually the case, but very well written and enjoyable
Hated it.
WTF ????
Awesomesauce. Not creepy, but awesomesauce.
not creepy in anyway but amazing none the less.
the ability to blow people up just by pointing at them and saying bang? i want it D:
Great detail. I loved it, too! ^^
Terrific idea! Great and disquieting story! The only part I’d change is the beginning, where he says “I’m making this video”– it’s very clearly not a video, so it kind of breaks the suspension of disbelief right there. It might work better than that if it were done in the form of a transcription, so we could get some emotional reaction from this character as he collects himself and breaks down.
basically an amazing story, but i wonder why he didnt say ‘pow’ instead of bang….also thank you Anonymous, i still miss the days of cowboy bebop…
Not creepy. But very good story. Yummy pasta.
Brilliant. I thank you for the chance to read this.
DUUUUUUUDE.
I don’t know why I keep coming back, but unlike last time, this time I’m not regretting it.
Best story I’ve seen on here in a long, LOOOOONG time. WELL DONE.
That was way better then the other more recent ones. Well written. Thanks
Ugh, somebody beat me to the Cowboy Bebop reference. XD
Not very creepy or scary, but incredibly unique. I really enjoyed it.
I actually laughed.
At least it’s the kinda game to get kids to stop playing Cowboys and Indians.
4/10, just for humor. Other than that, stale pasta was spat.
Lovely (love the descriptions of the carnage), but it reminds me of a joke:
“SO, this guy joins the army, but they had a tight buget, and weren’t able to outfit all of the new recruits with weapons. They tell him, look, it isn’t that complicated, in all the drills you can just make a gun with your fingers, and say “GUN GUN GUN” or something.
The guy trains with everyone else, just pointing, and muttering “gungungun” to himself as they all shoot at a target.
When they go into actual combat, he unthinkly holds up his fingers- “gungungun” And the enemy soldier keels over dead! “Gungungun!” Another dropped. He’s amazed!
All of a sudden, he blows up.
On the opposing side, there’s a guy going “tanktanktank! tanktanktank!”
Needs to be heard aloud xD
love this
I wish I had that power.
I agreed with Horace Horrible. It reminded me of the Borderlands cover too!
Freakin’ amazing. Beautiful. Fantastic. Awesome. Greatest story I’ve read in almost a year.
Much like Borderlands cover.
Reminds me of Cowboy Bebop and Fullmetal Alchemist, but I don’t know why.
A little redundant….
It wasn’t creepy but I loved it. I just wish it hadn’t been written as a video and more as a direct suicide note, but I understand why for the emphasis at the end.
Amazing as is. Would be even better if expanded on just a bit.
A fine story. Not creepy but very tragic, with a great concept.
Actually, falling bullets don’t really do that much damage. Wind resistance and such slows them down. It wouldn’t do that unless you shot like, a hand grenade straight down at the person.
Anyways.
The beginning looked a little promising, but by the end it got really lame and it sucked.
First comment i’ve ever decided to post.
Awesome story. Not creepy, but very awesome story.
I’d become an assassin. That’s just me though. Maybe you shouldn’t have been a complete douche and killed your girlfriend, huh?
The only thing that would’ve made it awsomer to be was if the author wrote:
“At least I’ll go out with a bang”
That would’ve been epiccc.
I liked it, I kinda wish it was a bit longer even, more details of how having this ability messed with his life and psyche
Not creepy, well written, etc. etc.
My chief complaint is how little we get of the whole ordeal – a kid and his game, fast-forward to a dead little girl, fast-forward to a dead girlfriend, whambamthankyama’am and the protagonist is dead. Would’ve been interesting to have been fleshed out more than it currently is, but all’s well that ends well.
Ray, you trollin’, right?
O_O
WHOA.
That is literally my opinion of this. What, the, heck.
It reminds me of a superpower I’ve heard somewhere though… the power to cause explosions with a simple gesture, surely it’s been done before.
I agree. I would have become a super hero, or something like that.
^^ Great story though. Not very creepy.
Wow. Amazed. Agreeing with everyone saying this is not creepy, but. Just fuckin’ amazing.
Very Twilight zone. I liked it. Not really creepypasta, but still good.
That’s not creepy.
That’s awesome.
Nice story, but the writing was just a liiiiittle too purple. Descriptive, sure, but in a way that seemed rather unrealistic for a traumatized superman about to kill himself. Maybe it wouldn’t have bothered me if the word “crimson” weren’t used three times. That word always pulls me out because it makes me think of the writer deliberately choosing a word more poetic/literary than “red”, and I shouldn’t be thinking about that when reading a story.
Well couldn’t he have just point his gun finger a little to the side? It would have missed then and the little girl will have been satisfied. Dunno about his girlfriend though
Loved it.
I LOVE THIS.
Not super creepy but I loved it :’D
With the little girl… why didn’t he just, you know, aim near her, but not *at* her?
I pictured the video while reading this.
o.o
THEN WHO WAS BLOOD
Pow! Haha!
Excellent descriptions. Good start and ended well. I liked how you made it so that he actually lost control of his “bang” technique (was very tempted to say “banging technique”.. i said it anyway =P), and that’s why he decides to kill himself.
Would be really interesting if instead when he puts his finger to his temple, he actually becomes morepowerfulorsomething -mutters mutters-
Reminds me vaguely of the old anime, Yu Yu Hakusho. But very good story. Won’t give me nightmares, but excellently written.
oh shit that was awesome.
Gorgeously written. I loved it. <3
OMNOMNOMNOMNOM
Write more.
You don’t realize the stupidity of your post. I can’t believe you would come to this kind of conclusion. I for one will not stand for you making up this kind of stuff. This website is serious business and I will not be told otherwise. What you don’t seem to realize is that this website is the very foundation on what this country was built on. We are taught teamwork, sportsmanship, and balance in horror. Without all of this, our society and humanity as we know it would fall.
I’m glad to be part of such a unique empire and I will fight to the death for it. It’s in my spiritual being to come to the aid of those who need it. To be questioned is to be dishonored and you should know that by now. We are all insignificant in this universe, and if nothing matters that means that everything matters. An example of my understanding can be seen in the book “Go Dog, Go”. When the dog hits the red light, he stops. This can be compared to many things in modern day life, such as when you get your girlfriend pregnant because you forgot to wrap it, or when you decide your kid is too ugly to keep. Everything gets better however when you hit that green light, and it’s smooth sailing ahead.
Some people do not make it to this green light and eventually take their own life. I am saying it is not the right thing to do, stick with what is hard and you will be rewarded in the end. No matter how hard life is or how bad your love life is, what you can do is all you can do, and that’s all that matters from a realistic standpoint.
Thank you for all the positive feedback everyone. It means a lot to me to hear that people enjoy my writing. I appreciate the constructive criticism too. I do agree that this story could easily benefit from being fleshed out, but posting it on a microfiction website necessitated some corners be cut. I’ve had some real life stuff to deal with, but I should be able to get back to writing soon. Thanks again for all the comments
This was creepy in its own way. If you think about it, having this power could drive someone to go mad, and knowing someone with this ability is quite frightening. However, if it wasn’t meant to be scary, it was beautifully written and left me grinning with it’s crude and horrible humor at the end. Very well written, one of my favorite for sure.
ffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
shit was intense
i like
lol i licked it
liked*
Murder in the first person and repressed memories are two of my personal nightmare buttons, so for me this was some intense creepypasta. The second memory especially gave me the willies.
10/10. Badass pasta is badass.
Wow.Thats just… I mean.. oh wow. The descriptions are amazing and the idea is fantastic too, I’ve never left a comment before but this pasta is just so great! An amazing dish you have here.
i love this.
it seems like only the start of something.maybe something stops him from killing him self?
it just flows good.good work.
Not really creepy, I was laughing and going “POW, HAHA!” in heavy’s voice through the whole thing. But you get bonus points for making me wish I had tele-explosive digits.
well written not creepy etc etc etc.
dirty redskin?
not nice…. no wonder this generations parents have no shame.
WHY MAN STEAL MY POWER
Guy has powers and is too chicken to use them. He’d be a blast in a circus, rodeo, revenge novel, a western, the CIA… take your pick. Not the best power to have, but it’s right there close to the Death Note, and most people don’t consider that something that nasty to have around.
GOD, I loved this one
Bad pasta is bad.
BUT WHO WAS POP POP POP?
Nice, but a little gratuitous with the gory descriptions. I mean, someone’s (the girlfriend’s) head blowing to bits after a point-blank gunshot is realistic. But unless he’s got bazooka fingers, I don’t think anyone’s going to explode all over the place after a shot to the bellybutton.
I’m a little disturbed by people saying this isn’t creepy (and more so by the anime fags referencing their little shows and whatnot). It’s probably the most horrifying premise I’ve heard all day. You’re a young kid playing with your friend and accidentally blow his head off. Anyway, very well written and effective, although as someone else pointed out, it feels a bit truncated at times.
DUN
DUN
DUN
DUN
DUN DUN DUN DUN DUN
Oh ho, that slaps me on the knee
I Bawwwww’ed
not a scary story, but the concept is interesting, and i liked the way it was written.
but i have one thing to say: no one who is thinking of suicide would describe things in such a careful way. it is especially clear in the first paragraph, when he’s describing him playing with the friend under the sky and such. no one would talk like that, especially not in a video… i suppose.
Oh. My. God. I want to be able to do that. . . I could add a scope to my finger and get a job with the see-eye-A.
Wow. Just… wow. This pasta was extremely descriptive, and it really had something going. I can’t say it was “creepy” per se (nor was it especially believable), but it was still exceptionally good.
Sigma’s “POW! HAHA!” comment made me seriously lol. The contrast between the SRS BZNS pasta and that comment was absolutely epic.
I give up. This site is no longer dedicted to creepypasta, but interesting supernatural yarns. (Sigh) I guess that’s fine too.
IT WAS OCELOT! HE POINTS FINGERS AT STUFF AND MAKES THEM DIE WITH A BANG
facepeel
stfu you racist faggot
I have to say this is a better one out there
. My favorite lines had to be the first and last line. And with these words i have to say, “but its not creepy..” is it me or did everyone say that? yes truthfully it was not creepy…but i wounder how scary and creepy it was for this person with the powers to kill people with a bang?
I want this power.
OH wow guys, the Heavy xD
“POW haha!” damnit i was thinking that and like 5 people beat me to it.
great pasta, not scary but pretty sad. very well written too
Wow, this is the best read I’ve seen in a while! 10/10
This was absolutely beautiful.
Not exactly the most creepy.
But chilling and breathtaking.
…
and the last line…
Genius.
<3 10/10
Easily my favorite pasta.
I loved the second paragraph. I could just so vividly imagine little boys playing around the swingset and then one goes bang and the horror begins.
BANG! BANG! HAHAHA!
Some of the phrasing was gorgeous, like “Johnny’s smile spattered across the grass”.
HABBADABBA
nomnomnompasta
dingo stole my baby
Kick ass.
HAHAHA
GOOD LUCK GETTING ON A PLANE DIPSHIT
Too bad. That kid hat serious law enforcement or military potential.
Why would you wanna kill yourself? You could use this power to fight crime!
when i was in elementary school, we had a program for mentally disabled kids. they thought it would be good to have them around “normal” kids. Anyhow, we had recess at the same time they did.
one day, i was playing some game with my friends. some variation of cops and robbers. i put my hands together, poked out my thumbs and indexfingers and laced the rest of my fingers together to make a gun. i started waving my hand “gun” around like a bad robber. One of the retarded kids put her hands up and screamed ‘DONT SHOOT!’ and started crying. all her friends ran off and told on me.
i got in trouble for making a gun with my hands : /
I’M GONNA FINGERBANG BANG YOU INTO MY LIFE,
GIRL YOU LOVE TO FINGERBANG BUT IT’S ALRIGHT,
COS I’M THE KING OF FINGERBANG SO LET’S NOT FIGHT,
I’M GONNA FINGERBANG BANG YOU EVERY NIGHT.
SANDVICH IS PERFECT FUEL FOR KEELING TINY CHILDREN
It took me a minute to get the last line.
wow i imagined everything this story has good descriptiveness i am scared out of my mind lol puns
nice!! as everyone had said before me, it isn’t really creepy. bit more disturbing…what a cool power to have though, just not as a little kid so you wouldn’t have to grow up into some fuck-up cuz of a horrible experience like the guy in the story did xD
overall, awesome story. 10/10
HIS HEAD ASPLODE!!!!!
wow kinda creepy but more sad than anything good job!
This wasn’t scary, this was awesome! I wish I could blow things(not people) up by just pointing at it.
This is a damn good story.
I don’t know if peple are not mentioning this because it’s so super obvious, or because they honestly didn’t notice, but I think that it’s implying that he he had his gun hand pointed at his head as he said “at least I’ll go out with a bang”, so that as he said bang he died. this theory is given more credit because he said it was a video, meaning he definately said it out loud. Sorry if I was so stupid that I didn’t realise that everyone noticed this.
Another old favorite. So vivid and sad and sweet. Love this one!
THAT WAS TOTALLY WICKED!!
:O
Yummy pasta is yummy!
Reminds me of that moment in Silent Hill 2 when Eddie goes ‘bang’ to his head, I just imagined what would happen if he could do that….
This was incredible! I agree that it wasn’t creepy, but it was definitely paranormal!
I love how the last word written is “bang”. He could very well have written “bang” as he had his finger next to his head~
Mikey: It is a transcript of a fake video. He said bang, presumably while his finger pointed at his head
Personally, I would have started shooting random objects just to make sure that what happened (the cowboys thing) had just happened instead of, you know, waiting until I kill someone else by accident to make sure
this. is. amazing.
not creepy, but the writing swept me off my feet.
<3
After he killed himself, he respawned, bought a Russian minigun, and became Heavy Weapons Guy.
“They say that ‘Guns don’t kill people, people kill people.’ Well I think the gun helps. If you just stood there and yelled BANG, I don’t think you’d kill too many people.”
I can\’t remember if I commented on this the last time I was here, but wow. This was really disturbing. At least to me. I notice some people weren’t too disturbed but I was.
And “Redskin?” We prefer to be called “Native Americans of Questionable Hygiene: now.
Normal person’s way of thinking: He says “out with a bang” and he is going to kill himself soon
In-depth person’s way of thinking: He says “out with a bang” with his finger pointed at his head
Stupid person’s way of thinking: He’s going to go on a killing spree before he does this with Darth Vader and Chuck Norris, however, Chuck Norris would just stand and look at people to kill them
10/10
so…spirit gun? lol
this one was one of the creepiest for me, though it does leave plotholes as to how he ever pointed at anything ever (maybe the power got stronger?) this scared me a lot but I am easily scared :[
if he said pow instead then the ending line would have been “at least I’ll go out with a pow.”
Then I learn I can not keel people of my team, and my fists are made of steel.
this is the best pasta ive read in a long time, well written, awesome story. Also i agree with Horace, it does remind me of the borderlands cover.
But before he kills himselfs he walks outside puts in his headphones in points his finger at the nearest targets and starts singing to Group X’s Bang bang bang, Lmao.
pfft I’d rob a bank if I could do that. what a pussy.
OH NOES I ACCIDENTLY MY GIRLFRIEND!!11!!!1!!111
im turning this story into a short film