Jeff the Killer

Add this post to your list of favorites!Excerpt from a local Newspaper:
OMINOUS UNKNOWN KILLER IS STILL AT LARGE.
After weeks of unexplained murders, the ominous unknown killer is still on the rise. After little evidence has been found, a young boy states that he survived one of the killer’s attacks and bravely tells his story.
“I had a bad dream and I woke up in the middle of the night,” says the boy, “I saw that for some reason the window was open, even though I remember it being closed before I went to bed. I got up and shut it once more. Afterwards, I simply crawled under my covers and tried to get back to sleep. That’s when I had a strange feeling, like someone was watching me. I looked up, and nearly jumped out of my bed. There, in the little ray of light, illuminating from between my curtains, were a pair of two eyes. These weren’t regular eyes; they were dark, ominous eyes. They were bordered in black and… just plain out terrified me. That’s when I saw his mouth. A long, horrendous smile that made every hair on my body stand up. The figure stood there, watching me. Finally, after what seemed like forever, he said it. A simple phrase, but said in a way only a mad man could speak.
“He said, ‘Go To Sleep.’ I let out a scream, that’s what sent him at me. He pulled up a knife; aiming at my heart. He jumped on top of my bed. I fought him back; I kicked, I punched, I rolled around, trying to knock him off me. That’s when my dad busted in. The man threw the knife, it went into my dad’s shoulder. The man probably would’ve finished him off, if one of the neighbors hadn’t alerted the police.
“They drove into the parking lot, and ran towards the door. The man turned and ran down the hallway. I heard a smash, like glass breaking. As I came out of my room, I saw the window that was pointing towards the back of my house was broken. I looked out it to see him vanish into the distance. I can tell you one thing, I will never forget that face. Those cold, evil eyes, and that psychotic smile. They will never leave my head.”
Police are still on the look for this man. If you see anyone that fits the description in this story, please contact your local police department.
Jeff and his family had just moved into a new neighborhood. His dad had gotten a promotion at work, and they thought it would be best to live in one of those “fancy” neighborhoods. Jeff and his brother Liu couldn’t complain though. A new, better house. What was not to love? As they were getting unpacked, one of their neighbors came by.
“Hello,” she said, “I’m Barbara; I live across the street from you. Well, I just wanted to introduce my self and to introduce my son.” She turns around and calls her son over. “Billy, these are our new neighbors.” Billy said hi and ran back to play in his yard.
“Well,” said Jeff’s mom, “I’m Margaret, and this is my husband Peter, and my two sons, Jeff and Liu.” They each introduced themselves, and then Barbara invited them to her son’s birthday. Jeff and his brother were about to object, when their mother said that they would love to. When Jeff and his family are done packing, Jeff went up to his mom.
“Mom, why would you invite us to some kid’s party? If you haven’t noticed, I’m not some dumb kid.”
“Jeff,” said his mother, “We just moved here; we should show that we want to spend time with our neighbors. Now, we’re going to that party, and that’s final.” Jeff started to talk, but stopped himself, knowing that he couldn’t do anything. Whenever his mom said something, it was final. He walked up to his room and plopped down on his bed. He sat there looking at his ceiling when suddenly, he got a weird feeling. Not so much a pain, but… a weird feeling. He dismissed it as just some random feeling. He heard his mother call him down to get his stuff, and he walked down to get it.
The next day, Jeff walked down stairs to get breakfast and got ready for school. As he sat there, eating his breakfast, he once again got that feeling. This time it was stronger. It gave him a slight tugging pain, but he once again dismissed it. As he and Liu finished breakfast, they walked down to the bus stop. They sat there waiting for the bus, and then, all of a sudden, some kid on a skateboard jumped over them, only inches above their laps. They both jumped back in surprise. “Hey, what the hell?”
The kid landed and turned back to them. He kicked his skate board up and caught it with his hands. The kid seems to be about twelve; one year younger than Jeff. He wears a Aeropostale shirt and ripped blue jeans.
“Well, well, well. It looks like we got some new meat.” Suddenly, two other kids appeared. One was super skinny and the other was huge. “Well, since you’re new here, I’d like to introduce ourselves, over there is Keith.” Jeff and Liu looked over to the skinny kid. He had a dopey face that you would expect a sidekick to have. “And he’s Troy.” They looked over at the fat kid. Talk about a tub of lard. This kid looked like he hadn’t exercised since he was crawling.
“And I,” said the first kid, “am Randy. Now, for all the kids in this neighborhood there is a small price for bus fare, if you catch my drift.” Liu stood up, ready to punch the lights out of the kid’s eyes when one of his friends pulled a knife on him. “Tsk, tsk, tsk, I had hoped you would be more cooperative, but it seems we must do this the hard way.” The kid walked up to Liu and took his wallet out of his pocket. Jeff got that feeling again. Now, it was truly strong; a burning sensation. He stood up, but Liu gestured him to sit down. Jeff ignored him and walked up to the kid.
“Listen here you little punk, give back my bro’s wallet or else.” Randy put the wallet in his pocket and pulled out his own knife.
“Oh? And what will you do?” Just as he finished the sentence, Jeff popped the kid in the nose. As Randy reached for his face, Jeff grabbed the kid’s wrist and broke it. Randy screamed and Jeff grabbed the knife from his hand. Troy and Keith rushed Jeff, but Jeff was too quick. He threw Randy to the ground. Keith lashed out at him, but Jeff ducked and stabbed him in the arm. Keith dropped his knife and fell to the ground screaming. Troy rushd him too, but Jeff didn’t even need the knife. He just punched Troy straight in the stomach and Troy went down. As he fell, he puked all over. Liu could do nothing but look in amazement at Jeff.
“Jeff how’d you?” that was all he said. They saw the bus coming and knew they’d be blamed for the whole thing. So they started running as fast as they could. As they ran, they looked back and saw the bus driver rushing over to Randy and the others. As Jeff and Liu made it to school, they didn’t dare tell what happened. All they did was sit and listen. Liu just thought of that as his brother beating up a few kids, but Jeff knew it was more. It was something, scary. As he got that feeling he felt how powerful it was, the urge to just, hurt someone. He didn’t like how it sounded, but he couldn’t help feeling happy. He felt that strange feeling go away, and stay away for the entire day of school. Even as he walked home due to the whole thing near the bus stop, and how now he probably wouldn’t be taking the bus anymore, he felt happy. When he got home his parents asked him how his day was, and he said, in a somewhat ominous voice, “It was a wonderful day.” Next morning, he heard a knock at his front door. He walked down to find two police officers at the door, his mother looking back at him with an angry look.
“Jeff, these officers tell me that you attacked three kids. That it wasn’t regular fighting, and that they were stabbed. Stabbed, son!” Jeff’s gaze fell to the floor, showing his mother that it was true.
“Mom, they were the ones who pulled the knives on me and Liu.”
“Son,” said one of the cops,” We found three kids, two stabbed, one having a bruise on his stomach, and we have witnesses proving that you fled the scene. Now, what does that tell us?” Jeff knew it was no use. He could say him and Liu had been attacked, but then there was no proof it was not them who attacked first. They couldn’t say that they weren’t fleeing, because truth be told they were. So Jeff couldn’t defend himself or Liu.
“Son, call down your brother.” Jeff couldn’t do it, since it was him who beat up all the kids.
“Sir, it…it was me. I was the one who beat up the kids. Liu tried to hold me back, but he couldn’t stop me.” The cop looked at his partner and they both nod.
“Well kid, looks like a year in Juvy…”
“Wait!” says Liu. They all looked up to see him holding a knife. The officers pulled their guns and locked them on Liu.
“It was me, I beat up those little punks. Have the marks to prove it.” He lifted up his sleeves to reveal cuts and bruises, as if he was in a struggle.
“Son, just put the knife down,” said the officer. Liu held up the knife and dropped it to the ground. He put his hands up and walked over to the cops.
“No Liu, it was me! I did it!” Jeff had tears running down his face.
“Huh, poor bro. Trying to take the blame for what I did. Well, take me away.” The police led Liu out to the patrol car.
“Liu, tell them it was me! Tell them! I was the one who beat up those kids!” Jeff’s mother put her hands on his shoulders.
“Jeff please, you don’t have to lie. We know it’s Liu, you can stop.” Jeff watched helplessly as the cop car speeds off with Liu inside. A few minutes later Jeff’s dad pulled into the driveway, seeing Jeff’s face and knowing something was wrong.
“Son, son what is it?” Jeff couldn’t answer. His vocal cords were strained from crying. Instead, Jeff’s mother walked his father inside to break the bad news to him as Jeff wept in the driveway. After an hour or so Jeff walked back in to the house, seeing that his parents were both shocked, sad, and disappointed. He couldn’t look at them. He couldn’t see how they thought of Liu when it was his fault. He just went to sleep, trying to get the whole thing off his mind. Two days went by, with no word from Liu at JDC. No friends to hang out with. Nothing but sadness and guilt. That is until Saturday, when Jeff is woke up by his mother, with a happy, sunshiny face.
“Jeff, it’s the day.” she said as she opened up the curtains and let light flood into his room.
“What, what’s today?” asked Jeff as he stirs awake.
“Why, it’s Billy’s party.” He was now fully awake.
“Mom, you’re joking, right? You don’t expect me to go to some kid’s party after…” There was a long pause.
“Jeff, we both know what happened. I think this party could be the thing that brightens up the past days. Now, get dressed.” Jeff’s mother walked out of the room and downstairs to get ready herself. He fought himself to get up. He picked out a random shirt and pair of jeans and walked down stairs. He saw his mother and father all dressed up; his mother in a dress and his father in a suit. He thought, why they would ever wear such fancy clothes to a kid’s party?
“Son, is that all your going to wear?” said Jeff’s mom.
“Better than wearing too much.” he said. His mother pushed down the feeling to yell at him and hid it with a smile.
“Now Jeff, we may be over-dressed, but this is how you go if you want to make an impression.” said his father. Jeff grunted and went back up to his room.
“I don’t have any fancy clothes!” he yelled down stairs.
“Just pick out something.” called his mother. He looked around in his closet for what he would call fancy. He found a pair of black dress pants he had for special occasions and an undershirt. He couldn’t find a shirt to go with it though. He looked around, and found only striped and patterned shirts. None of which go with dress pants. Finally he found a white hoodie and put it on.
“You’re wearing that?” they both said. His mother looked at her watch. “Oh, no time to change. Let’s just go.” She said as she herded Jeff and his father out the door. They crossed the street over to Barbara and Billy’s house. They knocked on the door and at it appeared that Barbara, just like his parents, way over-dressed. As they walked inside all Jeff could see were adults, no kids.
“The kids are out in the yard. Jeff, how about you go and meet some of them?” said Barbara.
Jeff walked outside to a yard full of kids. They were running around in weird cowboy costumes and shooting each other with plastic guns. He might as well be standing in a Toys R Us. Suddenly a kid came up to him and handed him a toy gun and hat.
“Hey. Wanna pway?” he said.
“Ah, no kid. I’m way too old for this stuff.” The kid looked at him with that weird puppydog face.
“Pwease?” said the kid. “Fine,” said Jeff. He put on the hat and started to pretend shoot at the kids. At first he thought it was totally ridiculous, but then he started to actually have fun. It might not have been super cool, but it was the first time he had done something that took his mind off of Liu. So he played with the kids for a while, until he heard a noise. A weird rolling noise. Then it hit him. Randy, Troy, and Keith all jumped over the fence on their skateboards. Jeff dropped the fake gun and ripped off the hat. Randy looked at Jeff with a burning hatred.
“Hello, Jeff, is it?” he said. “We have some unfinished business.” Jeff saw his bruised nose.” I think we’re even. I beat the crap out of you, and you get my brother sent to JDC.”
Randy got an angry look in his eyes. “Oh no, I don’t go for even, I go for winning. You may have kicked our asses that one day, but not today.” As he said that Randy rushed at Jeff. They both fell to the ground. Randy punched Jeff in the nose, and Jeff grabbed him by the ears and head butted him. Jeff pushed Randy off of him and both rose to their feet. Kids were screaming and parents were running out of the house. Troy and Keith both pulled guns out of their pockets.
“No one interrupts or guts will fly!” they said. Randy pulled a knife on Jeff and stabbed it into his shoulder.
Jeff screamed and fell to his knees. Randy started kicking him in the face. After three kicks Jeff grabs his foot and twists it, causing Randy to fall to the ground. Jeff stood up and walked towards the back door. Troy grabbed him.
“Need some help?” He picks Jeff up by the back of the collar and throws him through the patio door. As Jeff tries to stand he is kicked down to the ground. Randy repeatedly starts kicking Jeff, until he starts to cough up blood.
“Come on Jeff, fight me!” He picks Jeff up and throws him into the kitchen. Randy sees a bottle of vodka on the counter and smashes the glass over Jeff’s head.
“Fight!” He throws Jeff back into the living room.
“Come on Jeff, look at me!” Jeff glances up, his face riddled with blood. “I was the one who got your brother sent to JDC! And now you’re just gonna sit here and let him rot in there for a whole year! You should be ashamed!” Jeff starts to get up.
“Oh, finally! you stand and fight!” Jeff is now to his feet, blood and vodka on his face. Once again he gets that strange feeling, the one in which he hasn’t felt for a while. “Finally. He’s up!” says Randy as he runs at Jeff. That’s when it happens. Something inside Jeff snaps. His psyche is destroyed, all rational thinking is gone, all he can do, is kill. He grabs Randy and pile drives him to the ground. He gets on top of him and punches him straight in the heart. The punch causes Randy’s heart to stop. As Randy gasps for breath. Jeff hammers down on him. Punch after punch, blood gushes from Randy’s body, until he takes one final breath, and dies.
Everyone is looking at Jeff now. The parents, the crying kids, even Troy and Keith. Although they easily break from their gaze and point their guns at Jeff. Jeff see’s the guns trained on him and runs for the stairs. As he runs Troy and Keith let out fire on him, each shot missing. Jeff runs up the stairs. He hears Troy and Keith follow up behind. As they let out their final rounds of bullets Jeff ducks into the bathroom. He grabs the towel rack and rips it off the wall. Troy and Keith race in, knives ready.
Troy swings his knife at Jeff, who backs away and bangs the towel rack into Troy’s face. Troy goes down hard and now all that’s left is Keith. He is more agile than Troy though, and ducks when Jeff swings the towel rack. He dropped the knife and grabbed Jeff by the neck. He pushed him into the wall. A thing of bleach fell down on top of him from the top shelf. It burnt both of them and they both started to scream. Jeff wiped his eyes as best as he could. He pulled back the towel rack and swung it straight into Keith’s head. As he lay there, bleeding to death, he let out an ominous smile.
“What’s so funny?” asked Jeff. Keith pulled out a lighter and switched it on. “What’s funny,” he said, “Is that you’re covered in bleach and alcohol.” Jeff’s eyes widened as Keith threw the lighter at him. As soon as the flame made contact with him, the flames ignited the alcohol in the vodka. While the alcohol burned him, the bleach bleached his skin. Jeff let out a terrible screech as he caught on fire. He tried to roll out the fire but it was no use, the alcohol had made him a walking inferno. He ran down the hall, and fell down the stairs. Everybody started screaming as they saw Jeff, now a man on fire, drop to the ground, nearly dead. The last thing Jeff saw was his mother and the other parents trying to extinguish the flame. That’s when he passed out.
When Jeff woke he had a cast wrapped around his face. He couldn’t see anything, but he felt a cast on his shoulder, and stitches all over his body. He tried to stand up, but he realized that there was some tube in his arm, and when he tried to get up it fell out, and a nurse rushed in.
“I don’t think you can get out of bed just yet.” she said as she put him back in his bed and re-inserted the tube. Jeff sat there, with no vision, no idea of what his surroundings were. Finally, after hours, he heard his mother.
“Honey, are you okay?” she asked. Jeff couldn’t answer though, his face was covered, and he was unable to speak. “Oh honey, I have great news. After all the witnesses told the police that Randy confessed of trying to attack you, they decided to let Liu go.” This made Jeff almost bolt up, stopping halfway, remembering the tube coming out of his arm. “He’ll be out by tomorrow, and then you two will be able to be together again.”
Jeff’s mother hugs Jeff and says her goodbyes. The next couple of weeks were those where Jeff was visited by his family. Then came the day where his bandages were to be removed. His family were all there to see it, what he would look like. As the doctors unwrapped the bandages from Jeff’s face everyone was on the edge of their seats. They waited until the last bandage holding the cover over his face was almost removed.
“Let’s hope for the best,” said the doctor. He quickly pulls the cloth; letting the rest fall from Jeff’s face.
Jeff’s mother screams at the sight of his face. Liu and Jeff’s dad stare awe-struck at his face.
“What? What happened to my face?” Jeff said. He rushed out of bed and ran to the bathroom. He looked in the mirror and saw the cause of the distress. His face. It…it’s horrible. His lips were burnt to a deep shade of red. His face was turned into a pure white color, and his hair singed from brown to black. He slowly put his hand to his face. It had a sort of leathery feel to it now. He looked back at his family then back at the mirror.
“Jeff,” said Liu, “It’s not that bad….”
“Not that bad?” said Jeff,” It’s perfect!” His family were equally surprised. Jeff started laughing uncontrollably His parents noticed that his left eye and hand were twitching.
“Uh… Jeff, are you okay?”
“Okay? I’ve never felt more happy! Ha ha ha ha ha haaaaaa, look at me. This face goes perfectly with me!” He couldn’t stop laughing. He stroked his face feeling it. Looking at it in the mirror. What caused this? Well, you may recall that when Jeff was fighting Randy something in his mind, his sanity, snapped. Now he was left as a crazy killing machine, that is, his parents didn’t know.
“Doctor,” said Jeff’s mom, “Is my son… alright, you know. In the head?”
“Oh yes, this behavior is typical for patients that have taken very large amounts of pain killers. If his behavior doesn’t change in a few weeks, bring him back here, and we’ll give him a psychological test.”
“Oh thank you doctor.” Jeff’s mother went over to Jeff.” Jeff, sweety. It’s time to go.”
Jeff looks away from the mirror, his face still formed into a crazy smile. “Kay mommy, ha ha haaaaaaaaaaaa!” his mother took him by the shoulder and took him to get his clothes.
“This is what came in,” said the lady at the desk. Jeff’s mom looked down to see the black dress pants and white hoodie her son wore. Now they were clean of blood and now stitched together. Jeff’s mother led him to his room and made him put his clothes on. Then they left, not knowing that this was their final day of life.
Later that night, Jeff’s mother woke to a sound coming from the bathroom. It sounded as if someone was crying. She slowly walked over to see what it was. When she looked into the bathroom she saw a horrendous sight. Jeff had taken a knife and carved a smile into his cheeks.
“Jeff, what are you doing?” asked his mother.
Jeff looked over to his mother. “I couldn’t keep smiling mommy. It hurt after awhile. Now, I can smile forever. Jeff’s mother noticed his eyes, ringed in black.
“Jeff, your eyes!” His eyes were seemingly never closing.
“I couldn’t see my face. I got tired and my eyes started to close. I burned out the eyelids so I could forever see myself; my new face.” Jeff’s mother slowly started to back away, seeing that her son was going insane. “What’s wrong mommy? Aren’t I beautiful?
“Yes son,” she said, “Yes you are. L-let me go get daddy, so he can see your face.” She ran into the room and shook Jeff’s dad from his sleep. “Honey, get the gun we…..” She stopped as she saw Jeff in the doorway, holding a knife.
“Mommy, you lied.” That’s the last thing they hear as Jeff rushes them with the knife, gutting both of them.
His brother Liu woke up, startled by some noise. He didn’t hear anything else, so he just shut his eyes and tried to go back to sleep. As he was on the border of slumber, he got the strangest feeling that someone was watching him. He looked up, before Jeff’s hand covered his mouth. He slowly raised the knife ready to plunge it into Liu. Liu thrashed here and there trying to escape Jeff’s grip.
“Shhhhhhh,” Jeff said,”Just go to sleep.”
Credit To: Sesseur
Jeff the Killer,



I can’t believe you made the young boy at the beginning use words like illuminating, ominous, horrendous, and the lest goes on. No kid talks like that, especially a young one.
You had all your characters speak in ways that seemed unnatural. You either used formality (e.g., the parents calling Jeff “son”) or cliché phrases (e.g., “and that’s final”), and there were things of this nature I don’t feel like finding. It seemed forced, particularly the “son” part. It reminded me of being a little kid and playing pretend, and forcing the words to make it feel more real when it only does the exact opposite. Nobody talks like that. Or at least rarely.
The three bullies. Wow. You went so over-the-top with their personalities. I just don’t believe all three were such awful, violent kids and that all three were up for pulling out their knives on other people so readily. And to do it twice. In front of people.
And that’s another thing. You’re trying to convince us that none of the parents stopped the children fighting at the party? That’s retarded.
Still more, you had these four preteens (well, one’s 13 but still) fighting in this fantastic combat that even most adults wouldn’t engage in? Lol. That’s not believable at all. It’s not believable in general, but to make them so young makes it all the more dumb and all the less plausible.
The way he became crazy was so silly. And for him to kill his brother too, it made no sense. Psychopaths can care for a handful of people. And you made him care so much about his “bro,” only for him to kill the kid so soon.
I thought this feeling you kept making him have was whenever he felt annoyed with someone, and that you’d expand on that as the foundation for his mentality, rather than: four kids battle Matrix style, three killed, none of the numerous adults step in, and one goes crazy. Lolwut.
By the way, you could’ve just had his eyelids burn off. And his hair would not singe to another color; it’d burn off.
I could go on, but you get the hint.
Jeff being an enigma is creepier. If you were successful at executing this, it would’ve been fine though. However, you were not.
Anonymous(Quote)
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I absolutely agree but I still injoyed it. This inspired me to take all the criticism from theses comments and make a better version of this story. Its going to be a lot longer but Im hoping when its finished I can upload it and it’ll be better than the original. I’m also calling it just "Jeff" and Liu’s name is being changed to Louis. Lou for short. So I’m hoping for the best and I hope you guys are to.
Skylar(Quote)
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I am finished ill try to upload it soon
Anonymous(Quote)
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Submitted Jeff: Revisited…not on the site yet…hopefully soon?
Skylar(Quote)
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This is by far one of the best storylines ive ever read
Ben_____drowned(Quote)
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Really?I mean REALLY?By far one of the best!?Sit down and start reading then, because this ‘creepypasta’ is the worst I’ve ever read.It belongs to the crappypasta section.I only finished it because I kept expecting it to get more and more ridiculous, and it did.Okay, I got past the thing that there are 12 year olds who carry knives and mug people on the street in broad daylight IN THE FANCY PART OF TOWN.Also, why do they look like cartoon characters?A fat and a skinny goon and the boss…That is how I imagined bad guys until the age of 5…Then the next day police came.Sure, nobody witnessed the actual fight or anything, but them running away, that’s something that ‘witnesses’ remember.Okay, no problem.Jeff admits it, then comes Liu(WHAT KIND OF A NAME IS THAT!?) holding a knife, and the policemen PULL THEIR GUN ON A 12 YEAR OLD WITH A KNIFE.He’s not threatening anyone, but two adult policemen who actually have a strict protocol restricting them when and where to even TOUCH their pistols.Two officiers aiming a gun at a kid for no reason at all could put their badge down for a lifetime.Then comes the party and the fight.Remember the first one?Randy’s wrist snapped, the other guy stabbed in the arm?They magically healed.In like a week.No need to plaster a broken hand, you can hit people with it.Okay, so these twelwe year olds decided that they’ll murder somebody who beat them up.If you think that’s how the world works, then you watched way too many action movies(instead of reading books).12 year olds beat eachother up constantly but they don’t bring guns to some party with 50 people to murder another kid in front of a crowd of people.What 12 year old would have the guts to do that anyway!?Again, we’re in the fancy part of town.And this is where we have to go back to the beginning of the story..A kid wakes up in the middle of the night, finds a monster in his bedroom, the cliché story we all know.In the middle of the night they start fighting the ‘monster’, but they are interrupted by the police who were called by a neighbour.So you’re saying that a neighbour was watching over their house all night waiting for the chance to call the police?They arrive pretty fast too, since it would have been easy for Jeff(he’s supposed to have super fighting powers fueled by some dark thing in his brain but the writer ‘forgets’ to mentoin it) to finish them off after he stabbed the kid’s dad in the shoulder.So again, when there was supposed to be no witness at all, someone called the police in the middle of the night, but NOBODY called them when they were fighting at the party?Jeff’s face was burnt and he spent time in hospital.Even though he ‘turned into an inferno’ right after he regained conciousness he could sit up and so on.Actually it takes months to heal from that.Without therapy you can’t even raise your hands and even if you could it would hurt like a bitch…And don’t even get me started on the face and the hair..Burn victims don’t have any hair left…Miraculously, his clothes were sewn back together as well, even though they are supposed to be burnt(they throw those clothes away in reality but whatever).So we arrived at the ending, he went nuts, okay.But why did he kill his family?Just because you go insane you won’t try to murder the people you love.He wasn’t a particularly evil kid or anything, nothing indicated that at least(maybe inserting stories about Jeff torturing helpless animals or some shit, jesus..).And when his mother found out about his insanity she immediately wanted to kill him.How does that make any sense?I notice that someone from my family is crazy and I shoot him/her?!What kind of a MOTHER could do that?This whole story is a ridiculous pile of steaming garbage, it’s so horrible I don’t know how can anyone write something this bad.It’s clearly a ‘Hmm, I wanna write something cool so I’ll just throw in some bloody scenes, fake psychology and shit I saw in horror movies and then I’m done before I get bored with it’.Obviously written in one sit.Horrible, just horrible.And the reason I’m so upset is that this is actually a famous creepypasta.
Alexander(Quote)
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dude SHUT THE FUCK UP!is this your story? no? didnt think so! just shut up read and enjoy if you dont enjoy give it a shitty rating also kids like that are possible they have terrible and abusive parents and ig you get stabbed in the arm you can still use it may hurt but still usable and i will agree some things are messed up and stupid but some of the things you said are also stupid and maybe if you actually read it the kid or kids with guns said if someone intervenes gut will fly maybe the parents didnt want their children and/or themselves to be harmed also when he goes insane it makes sense for him to kill his family because 1. maybe he doesnt hold them dear 2. she did kinda betray him wanting to shoot him. plus if my kid went insane and was cutting and burning his eyelids off and shit like that i wouldnt want to see what happens next like what happened in the story she died. now i could go on a bit more but i really dont care and have already typed more than i wanted to so you enjoy pondering your idiotic thoughts. also just remembered this one but anyway the neighbor calling the police is totally possible maybe he heard a disturbance and screaming because pretty sure the kids dad would scream if he had a knife in his shoulder and the kid screaming trying to get him off of him. try to think more before commenting stuff that is actually possible. P.S. i believe i won :D
no…no…NO…PLEASE DONT……..NOOOOOOO!(Quote)
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Listen kid I would LOVEto see you write a crap your pants story
Anonymous(Quote)
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Shut the fuck up, thats your opinon, other people like it, fucktard
Ben(Quote)
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Well, even though the story isn’t realistic in some ways, doesn’t change the fact that it’s still creepy. The reason why this creepypasta is so popular is because of Jeff’s character. At first he’s a fairly normal kid, but the way the story is written shows Jeff’s slow descent into madness.This creepypasta is also great because in the beginning he was pretty much a good person, it shows how even good people can become corrupted. I definitely wouldn’t say that it deserved to be considered a crappypasta but some of it sure could use a reality check.
Nicholas(Quote)
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Dude it is jus a lil story. Don’t get so worked up
Anonymous(Quote)
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you never know it could be it detroit
quinn(Quote)
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I think that your COMMENTARY IS LONGER THAN THE STORY AND BY THE WAY, I would LOVE to see you write a story! It is HARD. Even harder, writing a Horror story! So go along, write a story or get lost!
slenderman(Quote)
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Dude!!! WTFH????? JUST SHUT UP!!!! THIS IS BY FAR THE BEST RE-WRITE OF JEFF THE KILLER THAT I’VE EVER READ!!! HOW WOULD YOU FEEL IF YOU WROTE A STORY AND SOMEONE GAVE YOU THAT BAD A REVIEW?? YOU WOULD FEEL LIKE SHIT!!! SO JUST SHUT YOU TRAP AND LEAVE1!!
NeonLazyLLama(Quote)
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hey alexander if you do not like creepy pastas maybe you should not be on this site because you are just an odd man out when you are the only one whou doesm’t like jeff the killer.
johnrico(Quote)
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I heard that all CreepyPasta’s (not all just most) were made by SlenderMan driven insane from the cycological aspect of his presence. However it went down I truly enjoyed the story. (2 and a half out of 5) hope this gets better.
SlenderSon426(Quote)
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Shhhhhhh, just go to sleep.
Jack(Quote)
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BRAVO!!! I totally agree with you on this one.
What a load of GARBAGE. Seriously.
And to add to all that – the COPS are judge, jury and sentencing panel all in one?!?!?
This is CRAPPYPASTA.
CanadianBroad(Quote)
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you do have a very good point, but this story is for entertainment, not for thinking everything through. I mean there are certain stories are not to be thought about.
MacKenzie(Quote)
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how many stories have you read then?
collins(Quote)
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I agree I liked the story a lot but a thirteen year old boy doesn’t call their mom “mommy”
MYSTERY(Quote)
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He went psycho remember
SlenderJeff(Quote)
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I’m sixteen, neatly seventeen mind you, and I call my mom mommy momma mummy ma ECT. And he’s going insane, his inner child may be showing.
samythepsycho(Quote)
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I’m seventeen and I call my mom mommy, momma, mummy, mama, ma, mum, ECT. And he’s going insane, his inner child may be showing.
samythepsycho(Quote)
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I’m seventeen and I call my mom mommy, momma, mummy, mama, ma, mum, ECT.
samythepsycho(Quote)
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He went insane, thats why he called her “mommy”
Anonymous(Quote)
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though they might if they are insane
MacKenzie(Quote)
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its nice to read about the man i choose to fight one day, so i know the truth behind his flaws and mistakes, for all those who don’t know me…My name is Cole…. I’m a 14 year old pre-teen girl who just wanted a normal life…including the killing and all but we all know the real story behind everyone’s mistakes…..
P.s- Stay awake, or die sleeping
Sincerely, Your beautiful-lest nightmare
Cole The’Killer(Quote)
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YOU ARE CRAZY WOMAN!
Anonymous(Quote)
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um……ok
MacKenzie(Quote)
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Hey… Does that mean that you’re the creator of Jeff the killer?? If so just email me on how you got the idea. ~celinebronox@hotmail.com
Celine(Quote)
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I love jeff the killer
Anonymous(Quote)
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is it up yet?
Anonymous(Quote)
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I agree with you in some things, like he cliche and the personaitys if the bullies, but it’s not your story and if you don’t like it go write one if your own; a better one. And I honestly think you could write a better one.
Anonymous(Quote)
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DAMN…0-o But i do have to agree with all of that i mean he went through all that ot help his brother just to kill him… I mean wtf and i also agree with the hair it would definatly burned off. Story 7.5/10 Your comment 10/10 :D
Some guy(Quote)
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that was crazy im scared of his face now jeeze your discriptive.i was lost in his pic of his face i just stared at it frozen untill my friend changed the page.
gammercall123(Quote)
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im scared of it too but it gave me the oppisit affect i cant look at it for more than half a second and even with that im going to have nightmares :’(
ShanLovezCookiez(Quote)
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Same here.jeez
jim(Quote)
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This kid is a mad man
Skull candy(Quote)
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His face was so scary my sister burst into my room crying and she had to sleep in my bedroom
Crystal(Quote)
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Hey, a lot of the younger generation learn words like that, can’t really judge him on that part.
How do you not believe the bullies were not violent? Pulling guns on others isn’t violent? Seriously though.
The parents were probably keeping the little kids safe, plus, the other two bullies had guns, if they even attempted they would have been shot.
Not all psychopaths are like that, this is a killer with NO sanity whatsoever.
How does it not make sense to save his brother and not kill him later? Let’s see, as said, you have a killer with zero sanity, and his brother, Jeff wouldn’t care if it was his brother or not, HE IS AN INSANE KILLING MACHINE.
Sure the whole "getting a strange feeling when around someone who you hate" Is a bit silly, but hey, it’s fictional, anything can happen.
Having his eyelids burned off, in my opinion is too mainstream. The thought of him going insane and burning off his eyelids himself is a lot better.
Again, it’s fictional, anything can happen.
I give this story 10/10
Dante(Quote)
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Exactly. :)
Anonymous(Quote)
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look. its fine,,,, the fact he made it like that makes it more exciting so fuk off… it was awesome…
Liv(Quote)
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Though all this may be true, I found that the story was still very enjoyable and exciting.
EpicBeats(Quote)
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Listen, asshat, it’s called fiction, and in this fictional world, the author is it’s god, which means the author can damn well do whatever he/she wants to do with the story. Fuck it if a’int realistic and shit. That’s what fiction is all about. Fiction transcends the boundaries of real life.
If it were, say, a real-life narrative, then, yes, your form of critique would work.
Fuck off if you don’t like the story just ’cause some of the elements YOU expected weren’t present.
Jeff’s Protege(Quote)
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Yo, the best works of fiction are supposed to be, like, realistic. That’s what makes them, like, good and shit.
The_Drawers(Quote)
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xD lol asshat but i have to agree its not real because if this was real slendy would be real to so tell me have u seen slendy?
$crap(Quote)
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Of course. Who hasn’t?
Magical Anon.(Quote)
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I like your smartass retort sounds like something I would say…Of course. Who hasn’t?
SlenderJeff(Quote)
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Of course he’s real.
Anonymous(Quote)
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Yes I am real
Mr. Slenderman(Quote)
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He is very real…and still owes me 20 bucks.
The Killer Known As Jeff(Quote)
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Have you seen slendy?
Slendy(Quote)
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I know I have
Anonymous(Quote)
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1/10 on the story, 10/10 on this comment.
The story was silly and not very believable. I felt like I was reading a goofy horror story from the 80s, where all you needed was mindless gore to make a story scary.
I can buy how he killed his brother after “saving” him, because if you think about it, he didn’t necessarily attack the bullies to save his brother, he did it because his less sane side took over.
I agree that the dialogue is contrived, especially when Liu says “poor bro”. Inconsistencies such as his hair not burning off bug me a bit, and I don’t see how anyone would be burnt like that and come out of it with bleached skin and shiny black hair. I mean I guess it makes sense if you’re Michael Jackson lol. But whatever, creepypasta is what it is.
Anonymous(Quote)
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Shut upwith the long
Anonymous(Quote)
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I have always thought that i mean the kid could say
“I SAW SANTA!!!!!! and he tried to kill me and my dad but still…SANTA!!!!!!
Anonymous(Quote)
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My 13 year old bro uses words like that.
The Doll(Quote)
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Kids are getting more and more violent these days, as you can tell from recent events. The fighting scenes do make sense though, the kids charge in with basic tactics while Jeff, with some strange sixth sense deal, has a natural edge towards fighting and easily takes them down. The bullies are shocked at it but come back to re-assert their dominance by attempting to kill Jeff. The parents couldn’t have intervened until the kids were upstairs because they had two loaded guns(unless you bring guns to a kid’s party). The bullies were winning at first, presumably because Jeff playing games with the little kids made him feel younger, more carefree, and less prone to the anger attacks that made him want to kill people. This can make the reader think about what would’ve happened if the kids had confessed beforehand and not returned to get vengeance, because Jeff would’ve stayed a normal kid. A few things don’t really fit like how Randy supposedly had his wrist broken and the other kid his shoulder stabbed and it’s unnoticeable a few days later.
The eyelids couldn’t have burned off in the fire without at least partially blinding him( unless he pulled them off his face a bit and burned them intentionally), and if the people had extinguished the fire on his head(including his hair and eyes), then his hair could have just been singed rather than burnt off. Think of when you throw pine needles or grass into a fire, they don’t just turn straight to ash, first the oils on the surface burn, leaving a black tint and a fragile but firm strand(if you put force into it, it will crumble in your hands but otherwise it will remain whole. I grew up surrounded by pine trees and we had bonfires almost weekly so i know what i’m talking about). So he could just have fragile hair if his hair was just the right length, and if the fire had gotten to his hair last there could be a thin layer of ash stuck to his hair.
Not all killers are the same, and he probably felt betrayed by his family because they all saw him as ugly after he had become what he thought was beautiful. He thought he was so beautiful that he couldn’t take his eyes off of himself and opened them permanently, and kept his smile perpetually smiling. After he’d done that they made it obvious they thought that he was ugly, and so he got angry, prompting his killing spree which took out his brother.
It may not seem to make sense but it fits together if you give it a little thought.
Seth(Quote)
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why would jeff kill his brother he wanted to stay with his brother
wesley(Quote)
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He turned into a fucking Psycho
dumass
Anonymous(Quote)
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*facepalm* He went nuts….DERP.
Anonymous(Quote)
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i was wondering that too, how could randy’s wrist be broken but then be functioning in two days?
and personally, i can see how Jeff would have been cute after the hospital (minus the carved-in smile and burned-off eyelids…)
Laila(Quote)
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If you really spent so much time around fires you’d know that you don’t have to put your hand in the fire for it to burn the hair off your hand.Even though your comment is actually good(not the ignorant retard style), this story has way too many holes.This story is simply bad as it is.
Alexander(Quote)
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You make some reputable points, however this is a piece of fictional writing, and the author can choose to execute the pasta in whichever style he wants. The boy at the beginning could come from an aristocratic background, or is simply just a literate boy. I’m 13, and when I was around 9-10 years old (I’m guessing that’s how old he was) nothing less would’ve been expected from me. And as for the three bullies, children like that do exist, and it just so happens that three of them were conveyed in this story. The fact that this is a fictional story makes all of these supposed transgressions acceptable.
I thoroughly enjoyed the story though, great work :)
CanterburyRock(Quote)
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This story wasn’t made to be believable. It’s a work of fiction. Just sayin’. And I don’t think that was very good “constructive” criticism. You could have been a little nicer about it.
Anonymous(Quote)
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┌∩┐(◣_◢)┌∩┐ BIATCH
Josh Biatch!(Quote)
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Calm your tits, it’s just a story posted on the internet. You shouldn’t expect it to be perfect and professional.
Anonymous(Quote)
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Umm, it is just a story bro. Besides, the kid could have been smarter than standards.
Creeper(Quote)
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Also, didn’t Randy die in the second fight? How did he confess in the end? Everything you said is true and why this story sucks for me.
Liu(Quote)
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Arent you suppose to be dead? o.e
June the Killer(Quote)
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No, Liu. The parents heard Randy confess of attacking us in the first fight BEFORE I killed him… And his friends. So yeah he’s dead. *realization* Wait, aren’t you dead? O.o
Jeff the Killer(Quote)
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He’s not a little kid he’s a teenager
Kingwazing(Quote)
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first off i just wanna say your wrong about Jeff going crazy all of the sudden. it is possible for anyone to go psychotic after a week or two. i know because i get those “Feelings” all the time. i’ve had trouble fighting them for a while. i often think of killing my family.
like i’ll walk up behind him and stab him in the throughout then, i’ll kick the back of her knee and stab her in the eye and so on. honestly i wouldn’t mind if Jeff came in the night and cut out my cheeks and lips. if the writer wanted to make Jeff more realistic then he wouldn’t have his eye lids burnt out. i mean try to keep your eyes open for more than twenty minutes. your sight starts to get blurry and your eventually go blind. his mouth and cheeks on the other hand, that is possible. i’ve thought about that and it would work. the only thing that would suck is trying to swallow stuff.honestly i wouldn’t mind if Jeff came in the night and cut out my cheeks and lips.
S.C.A.R.S.(Quote)
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Look into therapy/counseling. I’m not trolling you; truly, there is no shame in getting counseling when you need it.
derpbutt(Quote)
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nice name
Anonymous(Quote)
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Um yea cutting any part of the face could lead to infection especially around the mouth so please don’t attempt that… Ever.
Dawnofthedead(Quote)
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it’s a fictional story. and when people are truly traumatized, they can go insane in an instant and oh my god leave the dude alone. he wrote a good story so back off.
madilyn(Quote)
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I use words like that and I’m not as old as you might think. I can/ could use those words and defenses.
Wren(Quote)
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i think the way it was written was just fine. the bullies seem like the bullies at my school. they didn’t fight matrix style and the parents probably didn’t step in because shots were being fired. stop saying the things they wrote are “unbelievable” because it is their writing voice,not yours. don’t criticize the way they changed his hair color because the hair does get darker when burnt. it doesn’t always fall off. you have no idea what time the stories setting is in. they were happy with their word choice and i don’t see you posting stories that actually catch the attention of the reader. this story does catch attention.
madilyn(Quote)
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I think u need to calm the fuck down.
Kenzie(Quote)
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Okay let me get 2 things straight here. 1) yes, I could agree with you on SOME of these things but you don’t have to sound like you despise this person for messing up a little bit. 2) fuck off!! It’s FICTIONAL!! This is creepypasta guys! They’re just stories made to scare the shit out of people! You don’t have to criticize the person for not writing a five star novel! Even if you don’t like it or don’t think its scary, you don’t need to leave your shitty comments anyway. I personally don’t think it’s very scary or creepy at all except the picture and the fact that it involved sleep, but I think it is very interesting. And yes Jeff, your beautiful. I’m not lying.
Roflmao(Quote)
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I really enjoyed this story, but that comment was probably kinda mean, like, how long do you thhink it took to make this story. If you really respect the guy who made this story, then you really shouldn’t be dissing it. And I know I kinda dissed you too, and I’m sorry, but when the OP read this I bet you it made him/her kinda sad or something.
epicface3001(Quote)
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i say stuff like that all the time i’m 13.
i’m gonna go over yonder hill.
tim(Quote)
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You guys should look up Eyeless Jack
Flameblaze100(Quote)
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You never know the kid might have been a nerd and you critize to much
casy(Quote)
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To everyone complaining about the people who are giving this story a bad review. They are giving constructive criticism. Sure, they could say it in a nicer way but if no one points out the bad things about the story, the author will never (ok, mabye not as quickly) get better as a writer.
For example, if a kid makes a sandwhich and fills it with, say poop, (im not saying this story is poopy) and no one points out how it tastes like poop, then he will always make poop sandwhiches and never be a good sandwhich maker.
As for the story, it can keep you captivated, has average grammar, and yes, a little unrealistic at times. Now, im not saying that a story has to be realistic, it is fictional afterall, but a little realism helps with the creepiness as you can be able to believe that it can happen to you or, in this case, actually happened. 8/10.
Sorry for the long comment.
leV-Lee(Quote)
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I Pressed submit by mistake.
leV-Lee(Quote)
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Adults:Hey these kids are engaged in deadly combat…
The smart moneys on the fat one.
ezesnake(Quote)
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not to mention that he got the same thing he was wearing earlier “cleaned and stitched” if he was on fire his clothing would NOT have been okay after being “cleaned and stitched”
Anonymous(Quote)
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i agree with that but that snapping actually makes sense because before he went insane he was already feeling crazy and wanting to hurt people. All he needed was an outside source to push his mental state out of control. True, Psychopaths do care for few people but remember that he felt betrayed by his mom which pushed him even more, But the preteens being punks like that was a little too much maybe if their age was increased it would be better plus the party didn’t make a great location. So the metal factors are accurate but outside characters need to be change a little.
robert(Quote)
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Agree with this comment completely. Yes, it’s a work of fiction but it still needs to make sense.
Yes, some kids might use words like ‘ominous’ etc. but Jeff’s character didn’t really seem like the kind of guy who would. In fact, he pretty much had NO character. None of the character’s did.
The dialogue was horrific. I couldn’t take the story seriously with comments like ‘poor bro’.
Not to mention, the way the mother reacts at the end.
She walks in on her kid horrifically mutilating himself and says ‘What are you doing?’ then proceeds to run off to fetch a gun? Are you kidding?
Pfft. ‘What are you doing’… I mean, this is her KID, yeah?
Also, are you SURE the legal system works like that? No trial, no interrogation? Just, you know, a COP says ‘Nah, you kids are lying. Not listening to your side of the story. Here’s your charge’. Now I thought there was a bit more of a process then that.
Seriously. I kept hearing references to this ‘Jeff the Killer’ so I thought I ought to check it out, expecting something creepy or at least intelligent. Find this shit instead.
You guys sure don’t have taste.
breakherlegs(Quote)
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Shut the fu ck up. If you don’t like the story from the beginning, don’t finish reading it! Nobody wants to deal with all of your hate and bad shit you say about this. It’s just stupid. I really liked the story and I think the author did a really good job on it. He probably worked really hard on it too. SO QUIT HATING.
Person(Quote)
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He did not kill his brother. If you go to the begging a kid toll a story lingt to the end. I think they met liu was the kid at the begging
Anonymous(Quote)
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he became a sociopath duh
Anonymous(Quote)
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I love this story because I am doing a slide show about Jeff the killer and Jane the killer, eyeless jack,hodie,slendy, and Jeff the killer with a Mexican hat
matthew brousseau(Quote)
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It’s a badass sombrero. Not a mexican hat.
Jeff the Killer(Quote)
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Ok so this is unrealistic but really the only part “creepy” about it is like said the bullies would not be that brutal, psychopaths have some sense of sanity, so killing the only people they love is kinda true, but things usually have to set them off, parents, other kids, and cops would show up soon during the fight. I may not be able to write a story this popular, but not burning your hair off after burning your eyelids makes no sense. I really don’t want to look like a “hater”, but I feel this lacked quality.
Anonymous(Quote)
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The news reporters probably chose those words to make the little boy more “understandable”. Thats what they actually do u know? =3
Nyancat83(Quote)
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Yeah I agree, and can I add on? I don’t think that his NOSE burned off! look at the pic to see what I mean
slenderman(Quote)
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Also Jeff is like a rip off of joker
Anonymous(Quote)
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He wasnt a young boy he was 14-17
Anonymous(Quote)
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Oh be quiet. If you hate the story don’t even bother to comment down here. I’m sick of all the haters saying that it’s ridiculous. Just keep it to yourself. The world doesn’t need to know you hate it.
Anonymous(Quote)
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That’s just ridiculous. Is it your story? No. You don’t get to decide what people write. Plus, you aren’t insane so you don’t know if they care for people or not. If you don’t like it, keep it to yourself and right your own god damn story.
…(Quote)
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I am younger then Jeff was and I use words like ominous and illuminating and horrendous.
The grim reaper(Quote)
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uhhh….do u think its supposed to be believable?? ur reading this on a website not based on relisticness but on creepiness. i dont think the author was aiming for perfect facts to satisfiy critics like u. in my opinion they were aiming for a GREAT story line, which is what the produced. thank you and goodnight.
blain(Quote)
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disturbing photo
not willing to tell name(Quote)
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I feel so bad.. Jeff used to be such a good kid………. now thanks to Randy, he’s a maniac!
:(
Ipittythekid(Quote)
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I agree with the word choice part, but the reason he killed Liu was he just liked killing. And perhaps he did feel bad about it some time in the future.
PJ Carucci(Quote)
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TA: ii hone2tly diidnt like thii2. iit diidnt conviince me at all
Sollux Captor(Quote)
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i loved the story and because the author made it that way i love it its so unique…. i have no idea why people are hating this piece of beautiful work ..it may sound over the top but that’s how i fell :)
jeff the killers girlfriend(Quote)
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I know they probably don’t like children on here, but screw it, I don’t get nightmares easily. I’m twelve, almost thirteen, and I always talk like that. It’s normal if the child has a rather large vocabulary, which I do. In the story, Jeff is my age. Are you saying that we speak like nine year old? How despicable. Why don’t you stop judging children like they’re all the same. I know better, why don’t you? Also, “Illuminating” “horrendous” and “ominous” are all quite small words. It’s funny you adults think you know better. Not all children now-a-days shout “YOLO” whilst doing something horrendous. Or just say “SWAG” like they’re better. No, I want to either be a teacher, or a writer when I grow up. I do not believe in either “SWAG” nor “YOLO”. In fact the two disgust me beyond expectation. So, I have finished my rant. This small twelve year old who knows better thank others in her age group shall be on her way. Farewell.
Scarlett(Quote)
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XD HE LOOKS LIKE A RACOON
Bunny(Quote)
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this is freaky as hell says max.sleep wasent inportant any way says lucas
lucasandmax(Quote)
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I spoke with those words when I was young, however I do agree with the rest of what you said.
Anonymous(Quote)
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Pretty sure there would be more of an investigation before Liu was brought to juvenile detention right off the bat.
Randy and his friends must have some sort of record seeing as how their tempers are so short anyway. Just saying.
Anonymous(Quote)
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Finally, the classic has been added to this site!
I believe that it’s one of my victims’ finest works… in case you didn’t know, the original author went to sleep a few days after I read this for the first time.
GO TO SLEEP,
Jeff the Killer.
P.S. Some people have been asking, and yes, I do know Jeffrey Dahmer personally… or, at least, I knew him. He wasn’t fast enough to avoid capture, but I’ll never die! Sweet dreams.
Jeff the Killer(Quote)
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I don’t think you’ll find me or anyone Jeff. I think it’s time for you to finally..Go..To..Sleep. Sweet Dreams.
P.s I’ll be waiting.
Mandie(Quote)
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Jeff will never go to sleep. Why do you feel the need to piss people off by insulting them on purpose for no reason? I’m surprised you haven’t “gone to sleep” yet. I’m awaiting the day with a closet full of cake, balloons, and streamers. And Jeff I think your awesome no matter how weird my family thinks I am. :)
Roflmao(Quote)
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He is the author and he did make you up…Dumbass… Ps Pretty stupid of you to kill your brother and Whats with your emo hair it sucks. Have a nice day asshole :D
lol jk but really why did you got through all of that just to kill your brother and i mean just getting caught on fire doesnt make a good explination for you to go insane.
Some guy(Quote)
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O.O BITCH
You’llNEVERknow(Quote)
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What is wrong with emo hair?
Anonymous(Quote)
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Everything is wrong with EMO hair e.e
Anonymous(Quote)
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hey, jeff! just wonderin who would win between you and slendy!
ruthless(Quote)
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slendy all the way…
Alex(Quote)
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JEFF
I Love Smosh :DDD(Quote)
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JEEEEEEEEFFFFFFFF!!!!!!!!!! >:O
Roflmao(Quote)
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well jeff cant die and slendy cant die so a tie
jeffs proxy(Quote)
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Well Jeff can die because he’s only human. He’s just good at NOT dying, while Slendy, on the other hand, is a (in my own nerdy class specification system) Class 2 Poltergeist. Therefore he cannot die, only be expelled from a household via some sort of ritual. So I would say Slendy.
PJ Carucci(Quote)
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Do not know properly slender man he sneaky but jeff can stab good no slender man because he can actually not die
wolfling(Quote)
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Well that’s a rather stupid question.
First of all, neither of them are invulnerable to physical damage, (Neither of them is a ghost, demon, spirit, etc. All though you can’t be completely sure what Slendy is because the stories relating him vary. Let’s just say he exists in the form of flesh)
so that would mean that they could both be hurt.
Secondly, Jeff has an unusual set of fighting skills, meaning he could break bones and such quite easily, BUT, Slenderman is more of a “magical” entity, so he most likely has supernatural powers. He also has tentacles. He could rip Jeff apart in mere seconds.
That at least, is my opinion.
Pix(Quote)
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is*
Pix(Quote)
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Pix, I’m now your biggest fan. YOU’D WIN IN A BATTLE BETWEEN JEFF AND SLENDY.
WonkyTARDIS(Quote)
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Go to sleep…
I’ll be waiting
Maybe next time you’ll think twice be for coming to Illinois
Jane(Quote)
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scares of the past…
murder of your own blood…
mystery if you will ever get captured. Jeff, dont get too full of yourself.
You are now a ledend.
Be careful.
And Jane, stay out of Jeff’s way.
You may not get out alive.
~Black Ink
Black Ink(Quote)
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Rumors in my school are;
-Jeff is immune to the supernatural
-Jane IS supernatural, AKA Immortal
Your Name(Quote)
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Fuck off Jane!! I’m sure there are plenty of kids who have had their parents taken away (no offense to those people it’s pretty sad) and I’m sure they’re just as devastated. But seriously, you let yourself become just more evil than your parents would have wanted. Is that how you want them to die knowing you? An evil little bitch that gets in everyone’s way?
Roflmao(Quote)
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Nice poem???? ( if it isn’t a poem I’m so sorry!!!!!)
Bdjdjhhdheudjffjfifj(Quote)
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Jane is not a psychopath she didn’t kill for pleasure and she died in her fight with Jeff…
nickleaveatthat(Quote)
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Regarding your opinion on the “story” of how I became a serial killer, I have decided to rest the enigmas of this case. It is NOT fiction. It is the true story of how I became what I am today. If you had a single shred of sanity left (unlike me) you would have not wasted your time commenting about the errors and flaws of a true story told by me, backed up by the police, and confirmed by 5 intelligence agencies world-wide. A story as true as this is not to be taken lightly, mocked or ridiculed among the archives of creepypastas, as I understand you have intention of doing. Have you never felt that killer instinct like I have before? Have you never just wanted to KILL someone so badly that if it were put off for any longer your brain may explode? Now, I just have to kill. If I don’t kill someone twenty-four hours from my last murder, now I just lose what is left of my mind until I finally plunge my knife into them and laugh as they die. I am even out in the open world, hidden among the many people, my face kept hidden until such time as I kill again. In the last week I have claimed the lives of over 120 people, and try all had one thing in common. They tried to defend themself. My twenty-four hour kill period is nearing it’s end, so for now, see you in hell. I’m off to kill my next victim.
Jeff the Killer(Quote)
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finally someone agrees.well i’m off
alma(Quote)
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I can understand the psyco-family-killing. I can understand the loss of sanity. I can understand the killing other people at night. But how in the hell did you manage the flame retardant hair? Even more so with the bleach and alchol!
Anonymous(Quote)
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I really REALLY HATE MY FIRST NAME NOW!!!!!
jeff(Quote)
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Wooooooaaaaaaah scarry his face scared my soul out of me,I mean really his smilee……..0_0
And his eyes
Whats seen will never be unseen that picture will leave a huge scar in my memory
Amy8987654321(Quote)
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Wooooooaaaaaaah scarry his face scared my soul out of me,I mean really his smilee……..0_0
And his eyes
Whats seen will never be unseen that picture will leave a huge scar in my memory
Amy898721(Quote)
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OH NO, JANE! YOU WILL ABSOLUTLY STEAL ONE OF MY FRIEND’S LINE. IT IS TIME FOR YOU TO REST IN PEACE.
nightmareSLUMBER(Quote)
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Your a very creepy man and thats why I’m out to get you Jeff…..
Jane The Killer(Quote)
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you cant go after people just because the are creepy. that is just wrong. to me Jeff’s look is totally cool.
~Black Ink
Black Ink(Quote)
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100% agreed. I support you dude.
Roflmao(Quote)
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I got to agree with you but really have you heard of Jane the killer she has to go after Jeff the killer
Anonymous(Quote)
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Jane, you know what? You can’t get Jeff because their is one more killer out to get you. And thats me. The reason why I’m out to get you is because when I heard that you almost killed Jeff, it got me mad. I’ve killed many people and they don’t call me Robert the Killer for nothing. I’m a mix of both you and Jeff. My lips are black like yours, but I cut a smile into my cheeks like Jeff, my hair goes down to my mid back like yours but its greasy and black and a little bit spiked up to the side like Jeff’s, my eyes are only black like yours but I burnt off my eyelids, leaving my eyes bordered in black like Jeff’s. If you want to kill Jeff you have to go through me first. Also, whats make me a killers is that I stab people in the heart, rip off their skin, dry their skin in the sun, then I eat the skin. So, yeah, your gonna get fucked up by a guy who’s sixteen, killed his mom and dad, and has two brothers(one also named Robert and my other brother Max). So you better get ready, I’m coming for you. But, in the meantime I think your cute, I’ll take my time with you before I kill you. See you in hell!
Robert(Quote)
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Okay, the whole “i eat people’s skin,” was far, like.. mighty fucking far, but anywho, yea Jane, piss off, Jeff is the best person in the world and you almost killed him, that was a jerky thing to do.
(if only i could meet jeff if he was real.. andd wouldn’t kill me.. but dreams kill.)
anywho, Jane
leave
jeff
ALONEEEEEEE
Teka(Quote)
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Robert seriously, If your trying to become a new mystery or trying to be cool or something? Because you fail at it.Eating people’s skin? Really? That’s slendy’s job. If you want to write your own creepypasta go ahead. But stop trying to be better than everyone else. >:( Sorry if I sound like a real bitch, I’m just in a bad mood right now. :(
Roflmao(Quote)
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Come into the forest… I dare you Robbert! let’s see if you make it out alive!
Skull Kid(Quote)
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Ohhhh. Robert, get ready to deal with BEN and Majora’s Mask.
Person(Quote)
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Hey Robert,
U r awesome for standing up for what u believe in!!!! I bet u would make a great motivational speaker!!! U would make a great rowl model one day!!! Good luck with what ever what u want to be!!!!
Sinserily,
Animal lover19
Anonymous(Quote)
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…Jane, I really like you, but if your out for my jiffy… well…
YOUR DEAD MOTHER F****! ^^ can I braid your hair now?
*smiles holding knife behind my back*
June The Killer(Quote)
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……… OH MY GOD. THE RUMOR IS TRUE.
Brandon(Quote)
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for some reason i cried during the story……….and for some other reason i smile in a really creepy way when i look at jeff’s pic…….O.o
lolurface(Quote)
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HEY JEFF HAVE YOU HEARD OF JANE THE KILLER!!!
:)
Anonymous(Quote)
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Hey baby where are you? I’m going to kill you anyways, so you might as well tell me……..
;) You remember the hotel? Yeah that was fun,But you fell asleep and I wanted you awake when I killed you not asleep and horny!
With Love, JANE THE KILLER
Jane the Killer(Quote)
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What….
Hey Jane, yeah… forget what I said… IM KILLING THAT B@STARD!
June The Killer(Quote)
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pffft,as if your really jeff.your probably just one of those peeps fakin to be jeff.i mean,really.but if you ARE jeff,then come visit me sometime,kay? :)
Anonymous(Quote)
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Screw you! You have no right to talk to Jane Everlasting like that! Now… come to the forest…
Skull Kid(Quote)
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Hey Jeff! :D :D :D
If u really are him….. COME VISIT ME HERE IN MISSOURI!!!! Since ur a serial killer and all, I bet you can find my house… :D
Sincerely,
Ur #1 fan…. And a possible serial killer also
L.J <3
P.S, I think ur smile is sexy. :D
L.j the Killer(Quote)
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i like the way you kill… Personnally,I choose to see the fear in their eyes while they are slowly and painfully die in their own BLOOD….. that makes me happy….hahahahah!
ps:im a gurl. (super not important detal so,forget it -_-’)
bye and see you….maybe….
Insane Killer,Stabber,Torturer and other cool things…(Quote)
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Wait..what???
Anonymous(Quote)
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Sweet dreams? Since when does Jeff say “sweet dreams” sound more like Jane when she kills him on the mine craft mod. O btw for those who haven’t herd Jeff the killer vs Jane the killer Jeff ends up dieing. ^_^ hope the last sentence helped all the babies out there sleep. ^_^ Hmm I could real go for some blood right now ^_^
sweet deadlyshadow(Quote)
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You’re wrong. Jeff didn’t die. Jane did.Technically Jeff DID die but then he came back because he’s immortal.
Person(Quote)
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Jeff? Can u plz tell slendy that i luv him? Hes my hero and i want to meet him. He can have me as his slave! Ill do anything to meet him in person! Ill giv him 20$, hugs, and ill give him ideas 4 his nxt victim! =3 plz? 4 mii? =3 oh! And ask him if he can use his deamon powers to make other people have deamon powers? That way we could team up together and rule the world with fear! Thnx! =3
Nyancat83(Quote)
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how dare u i love jeff and u want him to tell slendy ur feelings!………oh well at least u dont love jeff
i lovepie(Quote)
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that is some creepy shit right there
blah(Quote)
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I’m scared…
I’M SUCH A WUSS FOR A SLENDER! LOL
Kiba the Slender Child(Quote)
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… dude jeff stop ur making it scarier
o.o(Quote)
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I shuld be a slender! Im pale white (i mean like PALE PALE white) i like have black hair and no face (litterly but dents were the eyes nose and mouth shuld be) and i allways wear a black dress and i make a noise when im around anyone that kills them…also i have these things that some out of my back that are black but i make people go into a black hole that kills them. If you don’t beleve me than f*** off cuz it is TRUE ITS TRUE!!!!!!!!!!!!! gotz it?
I am prob a slender girl that slender forgot about or im his cousin! IM A SLENDER!(Quote)
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Ugh, I hate this pasta. Not because it is scary, but because it is stupid. >.> Everyone worships this garbage like it’s so fucking scary. Tbh, it’s lame as hell and I’m tired of hearing about it. SHAME ON WHOEVER POSTED THIS CRAP.
fuck you, that’s why(Quote)
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WOW NOOB, id like to see you do anything better, this is one of the classic pastas, its scary, its interesting, just stop being a hater for no reaosn
ANON(Quote)
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Come on dude it aint that bad.I mean come on I know it sounds foolish but come on let his imagination run loose this is a site for creepy stories just let him be
Jake(Quote)
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Well the person who posted this “crap” was Mr.Creepypasta. So shut your mouth about this story. If you hate it, DON’T SAY ANYTHING. People don’t want to hear your hateful shit about the story. And those of you who agreed to that comment, Fuck you.
Person(Quote)
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First off Mr.creepypasta didn’t post this. If you would have looked it is sessur. Second I want to hear his hateful shit about the story. Third you are being a little hypocritical. I mean you said if you hate something don’t say something and you said you hate him and you said something so….. Finally do you want to fuck me or what I’m confused.
tytiger10(Quote)
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Wow you guys are assholes. Jeez, the guy makes a story and you just completely trash it? Fuckers.
Look, this story needs some work, but I’m not going to say it was awful. For one thing, it keeps shifting from present tense to past. And the dialogue could have been better. Still, it was an original idea (something that I think these previous commenters would have a real hard time coming up with).
I’m not going to comment again or have an argument with a stranger about my opinion. Keep working on your writing.
Matt(Quote)
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I agree with you, the story’s good. Some room for improvement but it’d make a good film that’s for sure.
Anonymous(Quote)
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Yes, it would make an awesome movie. ^_^
sweet deadlyshadow(Quote)
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Terrible pasta, what a mess. Guess the authors only just learned the word ominous
emaN(Quote)
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“Hey, guys? Wanna go to a party armed with guns and knives and try to kill that Jeff guy?”
“Okay, but what about after the fight, won’t we get caught?”
“I dunno.”
PsyckoMantis(Quote)
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Sadly, that is how smart jocks like these are.
Captain Awesome(Quote)
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You guys should hear the story about Jane the killer hers are sad and stupid
Anonymous(Quote)
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Lmao @ jumping over the fence. Ridiculous.
How did they even know he was there?
Anonymous(Quote)
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They could’ve followed him and jumped the gun when the time was right. Yes, I know this story needs a lil’ work, but still, it’s creative and it’s more realistic than most of the other Jeff The Killer pastas, if you think about it.
Luke(Quote)
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this is so fukinng scary but fucking awsome i love this but you should check out jeff the killer vs jane the killer and jeff if you read this i am a huge fan
nick(Quote)
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The first thing that caught my attention was the dialogue. Here’s what the boy started off with:
“I had a bad dream and I woke up in the middle of the night.”
Ok. Next:
“There, in the little ray of light, illuminating from between my curtains, were a pair of two eyes. These weren’t regular eyes; they were dark, ominous eyes.”
Uh, what? An average 13-year-old couldn’t write that for his end of the year essay. Either you thought you were writing the memoirs of an older person or you have absolutely no clue how people speak.
The last point I’m going to get to (because there’s so much more that I could) is the realism of the situation. The cop literally says ““Well kid, looks like a year in Juvy…” Whaaaaaat? It’s automatically decided that it’s either Jeff or his brother that’s guilty? No argument for self defense? Not even Miranda Rights? Please indicate in the first line of the story that this takes place in North Korea or some other fascist country, because that is absolutely ridiculous. This site is becoming a joke now.
Khorosho(Quote)
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I talk that way and I’m thirteen…
Anonymous(Quote)
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will everyone please shut the fuck up with there complaining… it’s a story, they talk that way to give most of the details you’d need to understand it. And they immediately say Jeff or Liuis guilty is because they need to make their point and get on with the story. Damn.
Alex(Quote)
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QUIT HATING
WE’RE TIRED OF PEOPLE POINTING OUT EVERY FUCKING DETAIL,
IT’S PEOPLE LIKE YOU THAT RUIN IMAGINATION AND HOPE,
YOU RUIN PEOPLE.
and the only reason it’s ‘becoming a joke now’ (WHICH IT IS NOT) is because pissy people prading on other people’s work.
thank you and have a horrable day you bitch.
Teka(Quote)
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truer words have never been spoken
lolurface(Quote)
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Jeff the killer is one of my favorite creepypastas and I totally agree. I’m not saying this because its my favorite but because you guys are all ASSHOLES!! >:(
I go to school with judgemental people like you and get “that feeling” when I’m around them. So fuck off its fictional. Why would you just go on the computer and say “hey who am I going to piss off today?” And yes I go to school with those people too. I know the story could be a little rough around the edges and you can let it be known in a nicer way. Have a nice day!!
Anonymous(Quote)
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i agree
lolurface(Quote)
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Frankly I think people I just getting worked up over construction criticism, because that’s what it is. It’s to help the author improve.
Theemperorpaulchen(Quote)
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The story coulda used some polishing and whatnot. Its not THAT bad….there’re much worse posted on here but it can use some improvements. By the way I’m too scared to glance at the pic….is it scary??
BlueBeans(Quote)
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YES. YES IT IS.
Anonymous(Quote)
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its not scary its BEAUTIFUL HAHAHHAH
jeffs proxy(Quote)
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YEAH ITS A FUCKING DISTURBING PICTURE! NOSELESS, ROUND WHITELESS EYES STARING AT THE CAMERA FUCK CREEPY SMILE.
Lucifersatanbealzibubmedistofoles(Quote)
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you are right this picture is DISTURBING VERY DISTURBING
Anonymous(Quote)
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“Do you want to know how I got these scars?”
Steve(Quote)
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acne?
Alex(Quote)
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HOW DID YOU KNOW???!!!
jeff(Quote)
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You people are asshole. Thumbs downing me! Fuck yall too!!!!
BlueBeans(Quote)
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You Know What? F YOU! YOUR A HATER!
Mr Derp(Quote)
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It was a pretty good story actually. I mean sure maybe it wasn’t realistic in “some” parts but other than that, I like the fighting and when he snapped and everything. The only thing I might say is that I kind of wished that there was an indication of where the article ended and the story began. :) And the picture’s not to bad but I love a picture at the end of a story.
John Macloy(Quote)
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I DONT!!!!!!!
Alex(Quote)
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that was awesome :3
Anonymous(Quote)
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This is in the famously creepy section… am I missing something?
emaN(Quote)
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Creepy in that “I wanna lobotomize myself after reading this” kinda way.
B_M_17(Quote)
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It may not be well written, and it may be poorly exicuted, but it is indeed a classic.
Zabthekabbit(Quote)
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I couldn’t sleep for two nights, also Oh :o
Watcher(Quote)
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Wow. I can’t believe the stupidity of all of my haters.
“It was better when Jeff was an enigma?”
This story is the classic, and possibly the original! It’s NAMED after me, and there aren’t fifty thousand pastas out there with the exact name “Jeff the Killer.”
By the way, Creepypastas aren’t supposed to be realistic, obviously.
I swear, you people would complain about a fairy tale because it’s so unrealistic.
Anyway, still think this one is great… (although it’s not true)
GO TO SLEEP,
Jeff.
Jeff the Killer(Quote)
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what ya gonna do,chop my hands of!? hahahahahahahahaahahah……whos that outside my window?
Alex(Quote)
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i agree jeffery haters make you famous
jeffs proxy(Quote)
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O my god shut up and stop calling your self that.
Go away(Quote)
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im not a hater……..im a fan…………………..
lolurface(Quote)
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i would probably be the only person to ask for your autograph…..
lolurface(Quote)
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GO GET EM JEFF!
Also btw, i’d be in line for his autograph, cause i know enough people like him to make a line, AM I RIGHT? if not thumbs down, but i don’t care, i’m standing up for what i like, and love, i’m part of the jeff army! Those who ain’t STOP POSTING WE DON’T LIKE YOU WE LIKE JEFF!
although it was depressing when jane came in..
-lesigh- shes pretty and all but ya’know.. don’t be hatin..
Teka(Quote)
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ikr…….
lolurface(Quote)
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JEFF ARMY WILL TAKE OVER.
hero_brine(Quote)
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*hugs your arm* I loved it Jeffy! ~<3 Its my favorite one on here!
*mumbles* unlike that tall mother f***** who lives in the forest…
^^
YOUR NOT BEAUTIFUL…
-June ~<3
June The Killer(Quote)
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Hi Jeffy *hugs* :3
Jane: -.- go fuck yourself
DONT SPEAK TO HIM THAT WAY BIATCH!
Jane: -.-*
June the Killer and Jane the Killer(Quote)
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Hi Jeff! I’m cosplaying as you next Otakon! ^u^
And also, for anyone who was confused about Liu, Jeff killed him BECAUSE he was his brother. Jeff cared about him a lot, so naturally he was killed first. It’s like an honor…or something.
The Plot Fairy Indeed(Quote)
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This crap is garbage and who ever wrote this must be a 4 year old.this is the most unplanned unorganized price of turd I have ever laid my eyes on.im angry this is in the famously creepy section because the only thing creepy is how someone could write such a monstrous peice of dog shit.
You fuckin dipshit(Quote)
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Coming from the person who wrote 6 sentences worth of writing and managed to do it in 3 run on sentences…
B_M_17(Quote)
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And for got to use capitals, I look forward to the time when people stop hating uppercase letters, I mean what have they ever done to you.
Baconius(Quote)
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Whoever wrote this comment must be an 11-year-old wanna-be troll who can’t spell. (-)_(-)
Luke(Quote)
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HEY! YOU CALLIN 11 YEAR OLDS STUPID!? I’M 11! And I spell perfectly so F*** OFF!
Slender girl(Quote)
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Oh my god who cares!
Truth(Quote)
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Screw you
Rico(Quote)
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Watch your language! >=C This was a great story on my opinion.
Sunshine(Quote)
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Look- just because YOU can’t write this good doesn’t mean you have to hate on other Pastas. I’d like to see you write one, get it PUBLISHED, and become a Creepypasta legend. Think about it, and go to sleep, Imbecile.~
Anonomous(Quote)
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What the Hell?
?(Quote)
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YOUR SO MEAN THIS WAS FANTASTIC!
Grace Real WereWolf(Quote)
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respect the story
???(Quote)
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XD u keep thinking tht bud ;)
Bunny(Quote)
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To the people like the first commenter, that think the story was too ‘unbelievable’: it’s a CREEPYPASTA. They won’t all be realistic, they won’t all feel like they actually happened, and you aren’t going to like them all. How would you like it if I took your favorite book, or movie, or whatever, looked at it, then poked a GIANT plot hole through the middle that made you see the story differently? Because now I can’t look at Jeff the Killer, one of my favorites, without seeing all these minor details that just seem… off. So thanks.
If you din’t like the story, or noticed something wrong with it, don’t make such a big deal out of it. It’s fine that you don’t like it, but instead of ruining the story for the people that DO like it, go read something else. And if you don’t like that story, read something else. That’s why there are so many stories on here: so everyone can have a favorite. And honestly, all these people that are calling it ‘unorganized shit’, go ahead and write something better, get it published on the site, and MAYBE I’ll think twice. Even if you do get it up, chances are there WILL be mistakes, there WILL be plot holes, and there WILL be an army of trolls just like you waiting to make fun of you for it.
Well. Now that I’m done ranting, I love this story. It is and always has been one of my favorites, one of the ones suitable to read at night, with the lights off, just before you go to bed, to give you that one last scare. Bravo, 10/10.
Proudly Insane(Quote)
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The only ting actually good about this is the picture at the end. It gives me chills super hard. The story though….uhm…needs work…to say the least.
Patrick(Quote)
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The fighting scene was TOO much. It’s great that you wanted to explain everything, but the motion switches too much to try to explain everything. Also, bleach doesn’t burn when it touches you. It won’t whiten your skin either, unless you leave it there for a LONG time. You don’t switch on a lighter either. When your hair burns, it doesn’t change colour, it comes off. Also, who was telling the story? Change the point of view to something consistent, it began as a newscast, but continued the story as what? A anchorman following the kids? If so, why didn’t he help when the kids were being jumped? Too many inaccuracies in the story, but good idea. 4/10.
My Nemphetanime(Quote)
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(COUGH COUGH) You suck..(COUGH COUGH)
although you hate it, i love how you point out EVERY DETAIL!, also bleach does burn when touched by fire most of the time, (COUGH) JUSTA BTW.
Teka(Quote)
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I would have joined in the fight and true at least one of the adults could have helped.
sweet deadlyshadow(Quote)
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HEY! leave him alone man and worry about yourself…stalker…
?(Quote)
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The raw idea is there & the picture at the end was a nice touch, but in terms of the english, there is definitely something to work on. I see no need to elaborate on this point as it has already been mentioned in several comments above. This is definitely a good ‘first draft’, don’t be so negative and take the comments as constructive criticism.
If you work on it I’m sure it’ll truly be worthy of being called ‘Famously Creepy’
Mr.H(Quote)
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I hear you.
?(Quote)
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