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Withering Heights



Estimated reading time — 8 minutes

Withering Heights (not to be confused with Wuthering Heights, the work of literary genius of the same name, though that is what it is named for) is not an experience I would wish upon anyone. I would like to say this, clear and loud. By providing the instructions, I am most certainly not suggesting that you, the reader, nor anyone else, ever play this game that is not a game. However, there will always be those who feel they can change fate, feel they are above such safety warnings, feel they and they alone have immunity to the types of things most of us shudder at the thought of. If you are one of those people, you are an idiot. You are reckless. And you will pay, dearly.

Now that you have been warned, let us discuss the rules.

This game is to be used for those who wish either to gain a woman’s affection or destroy a man. Unfortunately, the gender identities of the subjects cannot be switched, though the gender identity of the player is inconsequential. However, though the game will get you what you want, there is a price. A terrible price. Before you play, I beg you, ask yourself one last time: Is it worth it?

Yes? It is? Marvelous. Let’s begin.

Instructions

1. Begin by purchasing a brand new, never before read copy of the novel Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte. Read it fully within a week of purchasing it. It is a lovely book, I’m sure you’ll enjoy it.
3. As soon as you have finished reading it- and I mean the second you finish- grab matches and a glass of wine or bunch of grapes. From this point on, do not put the novel down until specified by the instructions. Do not stop touching it for any reason, or you will regret it. Go to the nearest patch of dirt in which you will not be disturbed. The patch of dirt should be at least ten feet across.
4. Using the edge of the book, draw a circle in the dirt, as clear and perfect as you can make it. It is now safe to let go of your book. Place it in the center of the circle as quickly and cleanly as possible. Do not touch the dirt inside the circle with your bare skin. Place the glass of wine or bunch of grapes on top of the book.
5. Using your matches, light the book, and subsequently the food or beverage on top of it, on fire. Make sure that it catches. You may use only one match. Should you fail to catch the book with that one match… well, I did warn you.
6. Assuming you managed to light the book with the first match, you will now need to choose the path appropriate to your situation.

If you are wishing for a woman’s affection:

1. Watch the book burn. Watch it intently. Watch the way the flames flicker, observe their color, observe their heights. Know the fire. Take as long as you need- the fire will not go out until you finish the ritual.
2. After some time, begin to imagine the fire differently. Rather than a naturally occurring run-of-the-mill flame, begin to imagine it as a fire of love, a fire of passion. DO NOT THINK OF THE WOMAN WHOSE LOVE YOU WOULD LIKE YET. If you must think of a specific person in order to imagine this, think of Cathy. Imagine until even you are convinced that that is what it is. If you do not reach this conclusion… I highly suggest you find some way to reach this conclusion.
3. After you have reached this conclusion, begin to chant, quietly at first. DO NOT THINK OF THE WOMAN WHOSE LOVE YOU WOULD LIKE YET. Instead, think of Cathy. Envision her in your mind, exactly the way you envisions her when reading the book. Chant her name, quietly at first, getting gradually louder. Cathy, Cathy, Cathy, Cathy. Chant it until it loses all meaning to you.
4. After it loses its meaning, switch seamlessly and without a fuss to chanting the name of the woman whose love you would like. Change your mental image to her, too. During this time, do not take your eyes away from the fire. Chant her name until you are screaming it very quickly. Chant it until you feel her filling your body, until you can see your relationship unfolding in your mind. Then, and only then, should you stop.
5. If you have done this correctly, as soon as you stop chanting her name, the fire should go out, leaving nothing but ashes. If the fire does not go out… you’re on your own.

If you are wishing for a man’s death:

1. Watch the book burn. Watch it intently. Watch the way the flames flicker, observe their color, observe their heights. Know the fire. Take as long as you need- the fire will not go out until you finish the ritual.
2. After some time, begin to imagine the fire differently. Rather than a simple fire, imagine it as a living hatred, a burning passion of disgust and revulsion. DO NOT THINK OF THE MAN YOU WISH TO DESTROY YET. If you must think of someone, think of Hindley. Imagine this until even you are convinced it is true. If you do not reach this conclusion… I highly suggest you find some way to reach this conclusion.
3. After reaching this conclusion, begin to chant, quietly at first. DO NOT THINK OF THE MAN YOU WISH TO DESTROY YET. Instead, think of Hindley. Imagine him in your mind, exactly how you envisioned him when reading the book. Chant his name, getting louder and faster. Hindley, Hindley, Hindley, Hindley. Chant it until it loses all meaning.
4. After it loses all meaning, switch to chanting the name of the man you wish to destroy. Change your mental image to one of him. During this time, to not take your eyes away from the fire. Chant his name until you can feel your hatred for him to your very bones, until you are screaming loudly and quickly. Until you find it hard to breathe. Then, and only then, should you stop.
5. If you have done this correctly, the fire should go out, leaving nothing but ashes, as soon as you stop chanting his name. If the fire does not go out… you’re on your own.

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After completing your specified process:

1. Using your foot, kick the ashes around and blur the circle’s line.
3. Walk straight home, even if you were not at home when you finished reading, even if you are miles from home. Do not drive. Do not ride a bike. Do not catch a bus. Most of all, do not accept any rides. The people offering them may not be who they seem. Should your cell phone ring on the way home, do not answer it.
4. As soon as you get into your house, go straight to your room and go to sleep. You will not wake up until the next morning.
5. After waking up the next day, continue your life somewhat normally. However, be aware that sometime within the next three days, you will find The Book.
6. The Book will look exactly like the copy of Wuthering Heights you lost, and it will appear to anyone else to be simply a copy of Wuthering Heights. To you, however, it will reveal wisdom. It may be anywhere, from sitting on your desk at work to under your child’s bed. Me on the lookout. Trust me, you do not want to miss it when it appears to you.
7. When you find the book, read it. It will contain instructions. I do not know what they will say. They will be specifically tailored to you. Some may seem strange. Do them anyway. After you have completed them, you will have paid the first part of the price. Your wish will come true the same day you finish the instructions. From the time your wish is granted. The countdown begins. You now have three days to return The Book.
8. Where to return the book? Simple. The Library.

Returning The Book:

1. From the moment you finish the instructions, She will begin watching you. You know have seventy-two hours to return her book, and not a second more. It is suggested that you note the precise time. She is author, publisher, librarian and, for those who fail to return the book, executioner. For your purposes, She is God.
2. The Library will not look like a typical library, and it will not be visible to you unless you do this part properly. As it not being visible to you would be really, really bad- never getting good again kind of bad- I suggest you make a good effort to do this part properly. First, you may do nothing else until you locate The Library. Do not eat, do not sleep, do not go to work, do nothing but wander about, looking for it. Do not drive or ride a bike. Walk.
3. You will know The Library by one indication only: something about it will seem… off. Perhaps you’re familiar with the are, and don’t recall ever seeing it, though it looks old. Perhaps the edges seem to curve, or blur together. Perhaps the color seems wrong. Perhaps it give an uneasy feeling. Note that it will not necessarily look like a library- it could be a shack in the woods. Make sure that you do not fail to find it within twenty-four hours, for She is watching, and She will take you if you do. And no, you cannot dissuade her.
4. Once you have located The Library- and you are absolutely certain it is The Library- enter it. Enter it as soon as you have identified it. Do not close the door behind you. It will seem very small inside, particularly in relation with its outside size. There will be only one thing within it- a wooden table. Place the book on the table, firmly.
5. State, out loud, clearly and slowly, “It is done.”
6. You will feel a wind blow through your hair. Continue to chant until it stops. It may get stronger. Do not stop chanting. You may feel a presence behind you. Do not stop. You may feel faint. Do not stop. The world may begin to spin, or change colors. Do not stop.
7. After the wind has completely stopped, back away from the table, making sure to keep your eyes on The Book. As you back out the door, state loudly and clearly, once more, “It is done. Thank you, Emily.” Do NOT forget to thank her.
8. After you are out the door, turn around. Make sure you cannot see the library. Walk straight home and do not look back. As soon as you enter your own home, the game is officially over.
9. Are you still alive? Congratulations- you win!

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The Price

As I’m sure you will agree with, now having read it, Wuthering Heights is a fantastic book. I do not need to stress this any more, do I? It’s been printed and read millions of times since it’s original publication in 1847. However, one thing dear Emily never mentioned to anyone is that she placed a curse on the book. Emily was an incredibly intelligent women, widely regarded as one of the most intelligent of her time. Wuthering Heights was her masterpiece. It was a work of literary genius, something only a true intellectual could write. Unfortunately, Emily was both a product and a prisoner of her time period. Unable to publish it under her true name, she was forced to publish it under a man’s name, Ellis Bell. No one would ever know the true author until long after poor Emily had perished. Withering away, knowing she would die with not a soul knowing her greatest feat, with all who knew her thinking her nothing more than a simpleminded girl, Emily cursed her novel, and all who read it, mumbling out instructions to access her fury with her last breath, thinking no one was listening. But someone was. Sara Williams, a young teenager who lived nearby, had heard that sweet Ms. Emily was dying, and went to pay her respects. Instead, she was able to witness and capture the creation of one of the most deadly games of all time. Not wishing to play the dangerous game herself, Sara left the instructions in a box, where her grandson found them, and passed them on. They have now found their way to you. What you do with them? That’s your choice.

Don’t make the wrong one.

Credit: Rhiannon Graham

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2 thoughts on “Withering Heights”

  1. Hey I’m Ali and I hunt demons, spirits and ghost. I absolutely love this story! I’v experienced a lot of painful stuff and this totally makes it disappear! Keep the good stories up and live your dreams

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