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Perfectown



Estimated reading time — 4 minutes

I was exhausted. I had just gotten home from another day of forced monotony that we call a job. I wanted nothing more than to kick back with a cold beer and watch the hockey game. I walked to the fridge and grabbed a beer before shambling to the entertainment room. Still warm. Damn. I sat down in my comfiest recliner. The footrest sprung up, and I pushed the back down far enough so I could just see the TV. I grabbed the remote and hit the power button. The TV flickered on, filling the room with the sound of hockey. It wasn’t the same without the cold beer.

I reluctantly sat back up and got out of my chair, and made my way to the stairs leading up to the attic.

I pushed the door open and stepped into the dark, musty room, thick with the stench of mold. I grabbed the flashlight that I kept by the attic door and clicked it on. I made my way around all the boxes, coming to the back of the attic. There I found the fuse box. I set the flashlight down and began to tinker with the fuses. A bit of light caught the corner of my right eye. I thought nothing of it, being too predisposed with my task. I finished fixing the fuse and turned to my right to grab the flashlight. But it wasn’t there. I put the flashlight down with my left hand. That’s when it hit me. Where did that light I saw come from? I recollected the flashlight and walked to the right of where I was. It didn’t take me long. I came to the side of my attic, where a crack in the wall was shining a brilliant white. I thought that maybe this was the end of my house, and the crack led to outside. But that was impossible. There was way more house below this light, and it couldn’t lead outside. It was nighttime.

I should have walked away, forgotten about it. Hell, if it was the middle of the day I probably would have. But my curiosity got the better of me. I used the butt-end of the flashlight to hammer through the wood where the light was emanating from. The larger I made the hole, the brighter my attic got. Soon, the hole was large enough for me to crawl through. I steeled myself before sticking my head through the hole. I came out in a room much like my rec room at home, but lit up by beautiful sunlight. I stood up and looked around. First thing I noticed was it was perfectly clean. Not a thing out of place, no dust anywhere. The second thing I noticed was the window. I walked over and looked out. What I saw was amazing. It was a small little village. Small houses placed close together. I figured I was crazy. I went back through the hole and shoved a box in the way to block the light coming through. I went back downstairs to my entertainment room and turned on the hockey game.

I forgot about the hole for weeks. My life was pretty normal. I followed the usual routine of work and friends, and when the hole did cross my mind, I passed it off as a dream. But the thoughts became more and more frequent. I became less and less sure of the idea that the hole was a dream. I had to go back.

I decided that tonight was the night I go through the hole again. I’ve been preparing myself for days. I know I can’t do this, but I know I have to. I work my way slowly to the attic and slide the box out of the way. Yes, the hole is still there. I was hoping it wasn’t. But I knew I had to go on. I dropped to my hands and knees and crawled forward through the hole. I found myself one more in that same room again. I walked to the window to see nothing had changed. Everything was still the same. I wanted to go outside, to explore, but there was no door. I slid the window open and dropped down onto the perfectly manicured grass. I decided to go left. I just walked. I wanted to know what this place was.

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I actually passed a few people on the streets as I went. They smiled and waved. Perfectly friendly. I passed a library, a hospital… all perfect. Clean, fully functional… It was amazing.

That was a month ago. I’ve been living here ever since. But recently… I’ve been feeling different. Seeing things I know aren’t there. Horrible images. Images you should not see. Images I cannot even begin to describe. I’ve also been struck with an insatiable thirst for bloodshed. For flesh. For death at my own hands. I crave the feeling of entrails wrapping around my hands.

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I went to the library and looked at a book of the towns history. What I saw… Oh god. Every forty years, the town entices one member of our world to theirs. This person is charged with the task of venturing into their world, and receiving all the accumulated evil from the last forty years. Their world is allowed to exist in perfect harmony at the expense of one of ours.

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But… I can’t cope with this anymore. These images. This thirst. This… primal hunger for death. I don’t want to do this. I think I’m ready to come home…

Excerpt taken from the Journal of Jeffrey Dahmer, 1978.


Credited to TheCoffinDancer.

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Copyright Statement: Unless explicitly stated, all stories published on Creepypasta.com are the property of (and under copyright to) their respective authors, and may not be narrated or performed under any circumstance.

152 thoughts on “Perfectown”

  1. “A hole to another universe in my attic? Hm. I must be insane.” ~Casually goes back to life.~ …. “Wait a hot darn minute.” Another note. Did Jeffy like hockey? Now I wanna know.

  2. This is so much scarier…because this is a real guy who actually murdered people, google the Wisconsion Cannibal

  3. would have been good except for the jeffery dahmer part. dahmer lived in an apartment, not a house, and showed signs of physcopathic behavior since youth. it just seemed like a lame afterthought about something the author obviously didn’t know much about.
    4/10

  4. Really really bad. Do some fact checking, Danger was crazy well before he lived know his own..he didn’t suddenly snap one day as an adult.

  5. I feel really disappointed. The sentences are formed choppily, and I had to push myself to read through it. The story itself, while a good idea, was rushed and severly lacking. Could be a fantastic read if executed differently.

  6. Holy crap, that explains so much. It all makes sense now why he would kill people. I mean, I know it’s a story and all, but it would explain Jeffrey Dahmer’s want to kill.

  7. "Jeffrey Dahmer" oh this is the reason why he killed and raped young boys then ummmm.He whad the thent crazy and had a taste for bloodshed, oh shit!

    1. sory i meant "Jeffrey Dahmer" oh this is the reason why he killed and raped young boys then ummmm.He had gone crazy and had a taste for bloodshed, oh shit!

  8. Dude…not cool. Putting Dahmer’s name in this, which is clearly fiction (Dahmer was displaying sociopathic tendencies in his adolescence, as well as multiple issues with past/present tense goofs) is unthinkably offensive to his victims and their families. Even to him, though that’s the least of my concerns.

  9. Dude…not cool. Putting Dahmer’s name in this, which is clearly fiction (Dahmer was displaying sociopathic tendencies in his adolescence, as well as multiple issues with past/present tense goofs) is unthinkably offensive to his victims and their families. Even to him, though that’s the least of my concerns.

  10. Not particularly well organized…why did he get up to fix a fuse for no reason? It had nothing to do with the game, TV was working fine. He just complained that his beer wasn\’t cold. Annoyed me.

    Also, if you\’re going to make it an excerpt from a journal, then commit to it. If this is a journal entry, then it sounds like the ENTIRE journal – he gives us a nice little introduction to discovering the hole, then leaves it alone for months, then goes through it and lives in that world for YEARS – and this is all within one journal entry? My suspension of belief doesn\’t go that far. This reminds me of the urban legends that circulate through email so long that eventually someone tacks \"THIS IS TRUE STORY LOL\" onto the end even if it doesn\’t fit.

    I liked the shades of the town of Omelas, from the Ursula LeGuin story, though, with the one person who must suffer so the rest of the town can live in perfection.

  11. I had to reread the part with the beer. I thought the “Still Warm. Damn.” thing was about the recliner. =)))
    But awesome pasta nonetheless!! One of the best I’ve read in a while.

  12. Um…

    Um…

    Er…

    Uh…

    …Nice. Even though I don’t have the slightest idea who Jeffrey Dahmer is. *looks at comments* …Nah, I’m not looking him up c:

    10/10

  13. You douche-bags, HE FIXED THE FUSE BECAUSE HIS FUCKING FRIDGE WAS BROKEN!!!!! sorry bout the caps lock, but, honestly, read the goddamned comments before saying ‘i dun geddit’.

    On a slightly less ragier note, am i the only one who read the title as ‘Perfect Own’?

  14. The story’s missing a part. He either never explained that the lights went out, or that part of the story went missing.

  15. Uh, what?

    Why would he randomly go into the attic?

    He sits down with a beer, watching the game, and then he goes into the attic for no reason. And what is wrong with the fusebox?

  16. shut the hell up with the “delicious pasta” “yummy pasta” bullshit. its a fucking story, not a plate full of carbs. your all stupid.

    nice story tho. well done

  17. Loved the part where it said “Im ready to come home”. I was thinking alongst the lines that he would satisfy his bloodthirst in this perfect town as a revenge course but I guess not.

  18. Saying this is the reason Jeffrey Dahmer became the way he did cheapens the idea of how horrible he was. Dahmer was a monster for realistic reasons, not supernatural ones.

    Nicely written. Mediocre concept. Bad ending.

  19. Honestly, I nearly lold at the last sentence. Don’t get me wrong, it’s an interesting idea and, before the horrifying images develop, fairly immersive. I think the cravings should have had more time to develop but otherwise pretty good.

  20. you know, Jeffrey Dahmer went to my school several years ago.

    i’ve heard so much shit about him, that i’m not sure whats true or not

    weird story, all in all

  21. Know what’s funny? Right before I read the last line I thought “heh, that sounds kind of like Jeffrey Dalhmer.

    Now THAT’s some creepypasta right there.

  22. Wait… Why was he up in the attic fixing a fuse? Was something that I’m not aware of broken? O___o?

  23. just wiki’d him

    story is nice but doesnt really match up with bio

    he was always weird and after 78 didn’t kill again for 9 years

  24. wow this was badly written.
    look at how many times it changes tense with one paragraph.
    wtf.

    it was also explained poorly… didn’t make enough sense to be creepy.

    an interesting idea though.

  25. This doesnt make any sense. He was at work all day while the beer was in the fridge so it should be cold. Also, what business did he have going into the attic? It all seems unconnected.

  26. too. Unbelieveable, hi rapid changes in cautiousness and the almost instant change to feeling very violent messed up this story

  27. This was pretty fucking stupid. Jeffrey Dahmer killed his first victim when he was in high school, you fucking mook. This pasta wasn’t even creepy.

    No creepy, inaccurate “real life connection” and a dismal story line does not a good pasta make.

  28. Good story. Could use a bit of clean-up in the grammar dept. but otherwise, interesting. I always like the creepypastas where a person goes to another world or dimension.

  29. Very nice pasta. When it tied it into Dahmer that really made the pasta just fit well. *pulls out fork* Mmm. Tasty pasta is tasty,

  30. @Nickosaur.

    Yeah. i read that and saying “I HAD put it…” sounds better, but I was going for the internal struggle. The way he would think it.

    Its not on my right. I pput it down with my LEFT hand”

    Emphasis on the left.

  31. @My brain hurts:

    …Then how did you finish it? O_o

    Those sentences aren’t really nonsense, its more of the narrator reasoning with himself, I think.. I guess it would sound better if it read like “I had put the flashlight down with my left hand.”, but it doesn’t really matter, the content of the story/pasta as a whole is what should be judged.
    And it was gooooooood. :3

  32. “I finished fixing the fuse and turned to my right to grab the flashlight. But it wasn’t there. I put the flashlight down with my left hand.”
    What on earth is this?!?!?!
    The pasta wasn’t half bad, but the grammar and complete nonsense sentences made it unreadable.

  33. Pretty nice, but no brix were shat. Mainly since I think it’s extremely unrealistic that he’d just forget about the hole. But the ending was okay, even though I had to google him O__<.

  34. the idea and plot is good, but like said before it should have been longer. If the guy had more emotion during the “changes” then it would have been much better.

    THEN WHO WAS PERFECT WORLD?

  35. the Person Formerly known as 'Noneya'

    I started reading this a while ago, then got distracted and never finished untill now.

    I really liked this one. I want him to go berzerk on whoever thought up the forty-year rule in niceworld.

  36. There was nothing good about this. Who the fuck would try to forget about the hole? Who wouldn’t take someone to the hole? The style was ok, but there was no detail or anything. Also, anyone who knows anything about Dahmer knows the last line is fucking retarded. No bricks shat, didn’t pass go, didn’t collect $200.

  37. for those who couldn’t get why the writer went up to the attic, SUX2BU XD
    he took a beer from the fridge but it was stil warm…isn’t it obvious that the fridge is not working? so he jz went to fix the fuse which was in his attic =/

  38. It’s okay.

    It could have used some mention that the beer was warm due to a fuse having blown for the fridge, though.

  39. Why did the person in the story go into the attic to begin with? One moment they are sitting there watching the hockey game, the next they’re fiddling with fuses? I think you may have skipped the part where the lights went out…

  40. That was fine until the “Jeffrey Dahmer” part, ’cause I remember hearing about him and he was some molester/murderer.

    Now the pasta looks like it’s trying to be some bizarre explination for why the guy killed people <_<

  41. It was okay. You have potential to write better stories though, keep in mind the grammar, as asdasurau mentioned. Also, you started way too many sentences with “I”. Therefore, it didn’t flow as nicely as it could have.

    If this was someone’s journal, then you should try to become that person, and think about what they would write/think. Don’t just tell the story in first person, otherwise it seems fake.

    Great idea though! :]

  42. Also…

    “Every forty years, the town entices one member of our world to theirs.”

    Our world to theirs?
    He said he’s been living there..
    so..
    wouldn’t “our world” to him, be the perfect world he found through the crack in the wall?
    if so, that sentence doesn’t make sense.

  43. “I decided that tonight was the night I go through the hole again. I’ve been preparing myself for days. I know I can’t do this, but I know I have to. I work my way slowly to the attic and slide the box out of the way.”

    Ehh, no one would write that way in a journal..
    Was he writing in past-tense or not? First he says “I decided that tonight WAS the night” then he says “I’VE been preparing myself for days” I’ve, as in, I have.

    WAT? :(

  44. Sir Shoop Woopington

    i liked this, it was quite good. This guy needs to clean out his attic once in awhile though, i mean honestly. MAYBE he wouldnt have any weird transdimentional portals appearing out of nowhere

  45. nice. best one ive read in a long time, and the first one ive read in a VERY long time that had that “feel” of creepypasta. with the whole unspoken evil and mind blown, ect ect. oh and also,
    WHO WAS VILLAGE?

  46. huh??

    He’s watching Hockey and then decides to get up and fix a fuse..Was the power supposed to be out and the writer forgot to say?

    Pretty good otherwise..

  47. I like it.
    Didn’t know where it was going until it was too late. Then the last line was the cherry on top. Both creepy and surprising, not to mention pretty well detailed and well written. I like.

  48. It was good until the Dahmer part. I really like it otherwise actually. Sorry, but it was a let down where I can tell it should have been a mindfu**.

  49. I won’t try to claim first, even though I don’t see any other comments…

    Well, it seemed an interesting idea, but I think it ended a bit too early. It could’ve gone a bit further than that, I think. Maybe a little more detail on the scary stuff, instead of just a taste for bloodshed.

    1. But do you know who Jeffrey Dahmer is? If you did it doesnt need anymore writing on creepypasta. Because his real life deeds are a horror story itself.

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