Hello.
Its nice to finally meet you. Finally? Oh, its uhh.. I’m just overjoyed to have someone to talk to. Oh, I cannot express how happy I am to have this opportunity.
Oh? Why am I so happy? Its really quite simple. The last few years of my life have been torturous. I mean, god… Oh thats a funny saying. God. No loving god would let any of his children go through what I have. But now I have someone to talk to. Oh glorious day!
Oh where to begin? I think it was a day much like this one. I went to the library with some friends to find something to do over the upcoming weekend. We got there just before the library opened and found an hourglass on the stairs. Real ornate looking. Gold encrusted and whatnot. We were pretty bored, so we turned it over, set it down, and got to talking. Few minutes later, the librarian shows up. As it turns out, he showed up at the same instant the last grains of sand ran out of the top chamber.
We didnt find anything at the library, but did have a new hourglass. We spent the rest of the day just hanging out at my place. We talked, enjoying the entertainment the media provides. We figured out the hourglass lasted about forty-five minutes. I cant remember when we did this, but thats about how long. Before it got dark, we went to go for a walk. Nice, leisurely stroll. I remember turning the hourglass over before we left. I mean, not intentionally. We were just playing with it, and I put it down, sand on top. We left. 4.30
One of my friends asked me the time. I remember glancing down to my watch. I was about to say 5.15, but then I heard the screeching of tires. I heard a shriek, and looked up. A car was backing away from us while another of my friends lay crumpled and bleeding in the middle of the road. His neck was clearly broken. We spent the rest of the night at the police station filling out statements. They never caught the driver. Knowing what I know now, I doubt there ever was a driver. Just some car.
We were sitting in my place a week later, absently fiddling with the hourglass. We set it down and forgot about it, talking about our lost friend. It was forty five minutes later when it happened. Exactly forty five. The other of my friends began to gasp for breath, holding his chest. CPR did not work, nothing did. He died of a heart attack. At our age. Ridiculous.
The other guy in the room that day was also with us on the walk. We havent talked since. I was sitting in solitude, head in my hands, grieving over my friends. It was then I realized that they had both died forty five minutes after the hourglass was turned. I wanted to be rid of the cursed object. I wanted so deperately to be rid of it, I did not consider what was to happen. I went and left it on the library steps again. I went back the next day, and it was gone. I would never see it again.
But things kept happening. Seemingly random, but I could only assume that the new owner was turning it over. Life was going terrible. The girlfriend I had made dumped me for another man. My friends trickled away. Oh but I was never alone. I would hear whispers. Laughing. Footsteps. Yes. Footsteps walking across the room I was in, and I could see nothing. It was so unnerving.
For awhile, it was only in the dark. But then, it started in the day too. Wherever I went, I head this laughing, mocking me from a place I could not see. I suppose if it had stopped there, I would have been fine. It didn’t.
I awoke one night the the smell of death. I also could not move. I became aware of a breathing sound mere inches from my face. It began to whisper. I could not understand it. I tried to sit up, but I felt a searing pain as something unseen tore into my chest. It ripped something out. I’m still living now, but the scars are there. Always and forever. I remember what happened after, too. I felt the air rush against my face, and heard the flap of leathery wings. I heard them fly out my door, and then a crash. When I regained my ability to move, I ran to where I heard the sound, and found a broken window.
I live with them every day. I hear whispers, laughs, taunting me. I try to block them out, but then I feel cold fingers wrap around me, and feel myself inexplicably led towards danger. This is why I can only be in crowded places. Someone to pull me away. Break the grip of whatever has got a hold of me.
I’ve moved around a lot. But they followed me. I knew it was pointless, so I gave up. I moved back here, to the place I lived years ago. Then, I saw you. I knew I had to talk to you. You were special. And during our conversation, I figured out why.
Nice to meet you. I’m you.
—
Credited to TheCoffinDancer.
Copyright Statement: Unless explicitly stated, all stories published on Creepypasta.com are the property of (and under copyright to) their respective authors, and may not be narrated or performed under any circumstance.
so did his body move and his soul stay behind? or did his soul move and his body stay behind?
no matter still love it and doing a narration on it
find it on youtube: Sirrmo B Readings
There really didn’t seem to be much emotion to me.
I gave it 8/10 because it think it has a lot of potential.
Wtf. So he’s future me? Some kinda time traveller?!
Sucky
The lack of commas had me seeing red. Use commas, dipfuck. (I’m a total Grammar Nazi)
It was pretty good, but not the best. It didn’t have a great plot, but it was okay. No Jeff The Killer famous story. It was more like Eyeless Jack, doesn’t make sense a lot.
And I better not see any by replies, I’m a critic of Creepypastas, and only here to type my opinion. Nothing else.
I am going to rate this 4 stars, only because the fucking lack of commas. If you really want to butcher the English language and publish it, publish it somewhere else, like Crappypasta.
~Shadowblade (this was a short one, sorry I feel lazy today)
Ok, for you people who don’t understand, when he woke up to “the smell of death” it was a a creature that stole his soul when he got up, and he has scars on his chest because it ripped the soul from him. His soul followed him around, which was the footsteps and wisperings that he could not see, and when he said “nice to meet you, I’m you” he was meeting his soul that followed him all his life. Understand?
Thanks for confusing the heck out of me!
I hate myself man. ;)
I dont Get it! It was a great story, but i diddnt understand the end!
( sorry for bad english, I am Norwegian)
~ Bekka
So the guy pretty much went insane and it got to the point where he was just talking to himself. This would have been better if you did it from a third person point of view, which would’ve given you the opportunity to go into more details and interactions with other characters or something, and at the end you could’ve put,’as he said this the nurse came in and said, “it’s time to take your pills”‘, after the very last sentence in the story.
i don’t get this story
Hm…. Nice to meet you too! I had a feeling I knew you…. I always had a feeling I’d meet you. That would explain that broken window too….
So if it is me. Then I’m the part they
ripped out of him? I’m like the soul and made my own person or something like that?
Ok, so wait….”I awoke to the smell of death” Who died? And why does the hourglass still afect them (erm me?) After they give it away? Why doesn’t it affect it’s new owner? Also, my girlfriend never left me. I never had one. Might want to make that more generic, if the author is me. Just sayin’.
:33 I wasn’t furry scared of this one. The ending was too pawdictible. Sorry. It was furry well written.
But who was killer?
well, I never am going to pick up a gold hourglass. I hate gold. loooooove silver. and with something that valuable, in a library? Riiiiiight. Okay, in my head, re-writing this to ‘museum’.
The ‘I’m you’ thing doesn’t work, as you explain loads of things which happened to you, all of which have never happened to me. Try again.
Generic. Author tried to hard.
Bad food.
Would never eat this pasta again.
So, knowing what you know now, you realise that your friend had their neck broken by a homicidal car, and youre somehow two people in different bodies? I can only assume that knowledge was obtained through large amounts of shrooms. Youve gone past twist ending to WTF.
this pasta would’ve been a lot better without the whole “nice to meet you!” and “I’m you” bit.
it would also be nice if you could explain the relation of the creature, the whispers, and laughter to the hour glass and why it was found in the library.
other than that, it was a good concept. 7/10.
WAT
INCEPTION
But… wait, what?
How can you be me, if you are everybody who reads this? Does this make me everyone who reads this? And everyone who reads this is me?
WE ARE LEGION. FOR WE ARE MANY.
Silly people. It harvested one of his kidneys.
i wanna hourglass :3
erhmahgerd, scary
srsly guys, srsly
But then who was hourglass?
Seriously though, what is up with people saying this is good writing? This is terrible writing and I’m rather surprised that it made it past the mods.
This looks like it was written by a 7th grader who is trying way too hard.
Not too bad, but the ending was slightly… I dunno, coulda lived without it. You could have expanded the story more, but over all it wasn’t so bad. The hourglass did make me think of Legend Of Zelda: Phantom Hourglass though. :D
BUT WHO WAS ME?
For the love of Darwin, the “i am you/it happened to you but you don’t remenber” kind of finish it’s just worthless as a CandleJack end. You guys gotta stop posting this cr
this sucked balls
Took sometime to understand but then I reallized that the writer is my soul or something.
I liked it :D
I know I\’m molesting a dead corpse here, but no one really addressed the major issue that hourglasses are supposed to last for an hour? But… I guess… evil hourglasses… don\’t want you to know what time it is? So you\’re late for your… business meetings? I don\’t know. Bad grammar, horrible ending. 2/10.
…I would seal it up in concrete myself
Oh really, Greatest? I find that horribly hard to believe. The writing is HORRIBLE. That’s no cover up for the “dense” thinking-shit ending.
Very nice. It was well written.
I’m guessing “you” is the person who now has the hour glass?
I’m confuzzled, for these reasons:
-“I’m you.” does this mean he was talking to himself, or it really was the cliche of him actually being the reader?
-the ending makes me wonder wtf all this has to do with the hourglass.
one thing I’d also like to say about this pasta is that i think the writer was trying to use too many elements of a good ol’ creepy story all at once.
very well written though : )
6/10
you guys arent thinking densely enough. he wasn’t implying “you” as in the reader he was implying the guy had gone crazy and started talking to himself
Nobody thought of Phantom Hourglass?
No?
Nobody?
Really?
Honestly?
Okay. I’ll do it, then >>
LOLZLOZLOZLZ PHNTOM 4%MNUTGLAAAAS LOLOLWO IM SOOOO CLVRRRRRRRRRRRRR
Ahem
Now, this had far too many cliched twists such as “omg demon stole my soul =(” and “evry 45 minuts bad tings happn” and “HELLO ME, I’M ME. HOW ARE YOU DOING, ME? IT’S BEEN SO LONG SINCE I’VE SEEN YOU, ME”. >.>
2/10
Personally i think it would have been much better if it would just end with “Nice to meet you” and so being creepy because all his friends died so by meeting him something bad would happen to you.
And then a skeleton popped out?
THIS MAN WAS YOU, or a lady if you are a lady.AND YOU JUST DON’T REMEMBER IT!
cherub stole my kidney
Set it on its side, put it in a box, lock the box. Screw that thing.
@Lithp
Well I think from what I understood, is that when the narrator and all his friends are together and THEY are doing the turning..Deaths start to happen. But when he gets rid of it, and someone or something starts to flip it over, it ends up ruining what he had left of his life.
Never mind, I failed.
*There’s something strange about this banana*
*It’s corn!!*
110 comments and im teh first to say
PIME TARADOX
If this gets posted, I’m going to eat my face.
It seems I’ve accidentally myself.
i don’t get why the first time they turned it over, something mundane happened (the librarian showing up), but every time after that, something horrible happened. it’d make more sense if the things that happened gradually got worse and worse. other than that, i’d say it’s pretty good.
but srsly guiz, srsly
THEN WHO WAS HIM?
ok srsly guiz
BUT WHO WAS WING?
BUT THEN WHO WAS I?
Nice story, but I could have done without “the flap of leathery wings”. Also; the ending.
BUT WHO WAS CAR?!
Okay I think this story was pretty good
And what I think about the whole I’m you thing is perfect for the story
Because the demon thing took something from the guy
And from my guess it made “us” from whatever it took from the guy
If you guys didn’t figure that out
Your two kinds of stupid :P
HELLO ME…. MEET THE REAL ME! <_<
The end ruined it. Harsh, but true.
time paradox?
It was a perfectly fine story until the ending. And what’s the deal on the librarian?
I don’t understand the librarian bit.
The librarian came. Then what happened?
Did he use Kleenex or a towel?
HE COULD BE YOU, HE COULD BE ME! HE COULD EVEN BE-shot-
WHO WAS YOU?
The hourglass never got resolved god dammit!
“The girlfriend I had made”?! He crafted a golem girlfriend?
AND THEN JOHN WAS AN HOURGLASS
hi, me! :D wtf? i never found an hourglass. nor are my friends ded/dying. but apprently. it WILL happen.
given: BUT WHO IS ME?!
WTF?
CoffinDancer, I applaud you for clearing it up, but overall, it just didn’t really work.
At first, the thing just killed people.
Then, it turns out it only causes misery to him. Okay. I can deal so far.
Stuff’s only happening at night? Is the new owner an insomniac?
Now there are…demons involved…?
And now he’s…gone back in time…and he was…the librarian…?
Starts out really good. You got cheated a little bit with the common theme of an “artifact of death,” though, so the overall effect was just amusement. Then it just kinda slowly degenerated into WTF territory.
this sucked my balls. it was terrible.
was 5/5
“i am you”
now 0/5
I think the “I’m you” part just meant that he never found someone else to talk to, he’s just going insane talking to himself.
Wait, So I’m Jesus?
lol
wait, whuuuut
but i havent got a scar on my chest… also, ive never moved….and my friends havent died… and ive never seen an hourglass that lasted 45 mins….. tut,tut,tut….
i kinda like it… its ok… but the ending is cinfusing,, and wat if da reader is a gurl??? then they wud stil have a girlfriend?? haha lolx anyway, im pretty ok wid da story,, got creeped out til the end i got confused suddenly instead… :P:P lolx oh well dats lyf… haha
FUUUUUU
IM GONNA HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?! FUCKING AWSOME!
HOURGLASS CASTS SUMMON LIBRARIAN.
the phantom hourglass
creepy stuff man creepy stuff! but kudos to u
it seemed like you wrote it but then got stuck. came back a month later and tacked on the ending. but i liked it overall.
Yeah.. I think the transition from “Hourglass doing stuff” to “My soul gets ripped out” to “OH HEY IT IS ME” made absolutely no sense. Sorry author, but I think you had no ending to this story and just pounded out a load of nonsense.
So it’s not a Death Note,but a Death Hourglass?
I’m gonna have to give this one a two-thumbs down. It had potential with the hourglass being able to kill. ’til someone else grabs it and it doesn’t kill it just ruins your life. and the twist at the end might be somewhat effective if the protagonist was more generally relatable.
Interesting… It seems if you put it in a tone like your own actual perspective.. it makes it more realistic.
I just read it to my friend on the phone :)
he assumes, but I kinda get it.
death has a way of making one talk to ones self
“nice to meet you, im you” fits perfectly.
Good Job hun :)
FINAL DESTINATION HOUR GLASS
It was decent but the ending confused me a bit. (.___.)
I must say I agree with the other commenters- the last line didn’t really fit. Would have been better to have something else or even miss it out altogether. After all, a lot of people are saying ‘wtf?’ as the character related by the pasta is nothing like them (although that could be minimised by leaving out the girlfriend part, thus allowing straight girls and gay guys to be more creeped out)
is confuzzled
WAT
Wow. That one was good, but the ending died.
For some reason that made my body go really cold at the end. Maybe just coincidence but was rather spooky.
Huh? O.o I like it… but huh? lol
But who was hour glass?
I ACCIDENTALLY HOURGLASS
Oh my, Snowden.
Please, be my guest. Show me what you consider to be a good pasta.
For those who don’t get this, the whole plot was the kids find this hourglass, and it starts causing trouble. They get rid of it, but shit keeps happening. The narrator goes through years of veritable torture, before finding his past self. I wanted to leave it open how he was somehow talking to his past self (clearly before the hourglass was found)
um…my girlfriend dumped me…but wait…Im a girl..A STRAIGHT GIRL!
Coffindancer, every one of your pastas leaves me with the same feeling. Utter disappointment. You fail at creepypasta.
It would have been more effective if maybe the ‘visitor’ at the end was about to turn over the hourglass. Or was the overturned hourglass coming to finish unfinished business?
” I’ve moved around a lot. But they followed me. I knew it was pointless, so I gave up. I moved back here, to the place I lived years ago. Then, I saw you. I knew I had to talk to you. You were special. And during our conversation, I figured out why……
I had to stop the last grain in your hourglass. ”
I don’t know – something to that effect maybe?
Oh snap!! That’s freakin’ creepy!!
Not even touching on the plot, because it’s been covered above, but people think this is well-written? The grammar is terrible.
“The girlfriend I had made” …what? You made your girlfriend, or you HAD a girlfriend? Also, commas. You need them.
BUT WHO WAS BROKEN WINDOW?
BUT WHO WAS SAND O_o
but who am i
Do not understand! If I went through shit then went back in time to talk to me, I’d recognise me straight away and be able to warn myself, and things would change. If it was in the future, then there’d be no point in telling me my life story as I would already know it.
I was getting creeped out until the shitty ending. Doesn’t even make sense.
Eh, i’ve read better, but it seems like it’s missing something.
You’re me? No, I don’t think so. The rest was good, but that ending was absolutely wretched and totally out of left field…
WTF happened there?
@ Tyto:
I was thinking the exact same thing.
Indeed, ending seemed quite off. It was sort of nice for the hourglass not to mysteriously come back, but then things started to go too different.
I’d say: make a few more references to the hourglass later, and give it an ending that actually makes sense.
no you’re not me. Get out of my living room
Then who was reference?
and who was pissy commenter
LOVE IT! I actually think the twist at the end was brilliant, i think your giving not enough credit. I loved this pasta :)
last lie killed it
other ten that great, rewrite tthat last line and yuve got 9.5/10if not a 10
goodo
this is weird????
I feel it left something to be desired. The ending was less than satisfactory. Perhaps it could have been improved if it was a bit longer? I feel like the ending was too rushed and sloppy.
but who was PHONE?
I agree… this post has too many different themes going on: the end result is an ineffective pasta that leaves each theme barely touched upon…
It’s a really good idea, just have to run with it more and not chop it where detail is or isn’t needed.
I agree with what the rest of them said, the ending twist didn’t really seem to fit. It had some real potential, though I was expecting them to keep the hourglass, and it would turn over on its own or the sand would still fall even if they turn it upside down, and he’s typing the story as the last grains of sand run out…
The main thing I didn’t like was how the bad things began to happen with the hourglass, but when it was removed everything just got worse. Maybe they could’ve tried getting rid of it, but they see it everywhere they go until it runs out.
But it’s your choice, not my story. I need to cook up a pasta of my own one of these days.
Agreed, Sigma.
THEN WHO WAS YOU?
BUT WHO WAS THIS FUCKING JOKE HAS GONE ON WAY TOO FUCKING LONG AND NEEDS TO FUCKING DIE?
BUT WHO WAS DRIVER?
BUT WHO WAS WINGS?
BUT WHO WAS YOU?
BUT WHO WAS CAR?
BUT WHO WAS HOURGLASS?
Oh, and why did they (I?) have no one to talk to? I don’t get it.
Confusing. It’s like you started with one story then picked up another. Not the best pasta. =/
I give it… 8/10. Pretty well-written for the most part – I just didn’t like the “I’m you!” twist at the end. Otherwise, though, good job. I particularly liked how, even after “I”/the character took the hourglass back, someone else kept turning it and wreaking havoc on “my”/the character’s life. :3
Skipped half of the pasta to the conclusion because it was so freeking boring.
I’m not sure i understand… is what Sigma write true? is that what the ending means? did the hourglass like send the speaker back in time, and is now talking to themself about whats to come? if so then yeah thats a cool ending but otherwise im sticking with ‘WTF?”
It seems like the writer wanted to make it more scary, so he quickly added “IT’S YOU! ALL THIS IS GOING TO HAPPEN TO YOU! IN SEVEN DAYS! DON’T READ THIS OR YOU WILL DIE!”
You should have stuck with the hourglass story. This is just two half-baked pastas smashed together.
Yep. General consensus is agreed with.
WTF?
You needed to talk to me because…wait. What?
WHO WAS POINTLESS SWERVE?
It had good potential, but the “I’m you” bit did seem a bit off. Still pretty nice, a seven out of ten. (Maybe a slight rewrite is in order?) It was a good idea.
Lol at the “WHO WAS ME?”
Stupid ending. If it was me why would I need to hear the story of my life? I would already know.
I think the writer got bored of writing and just stuck there the first inane semi-creepy plot twist he could think of
Nice try, but he mentioned walking. I have one leg.
You have failed hard.
Too much “Oh” in the first paragraph.
it was okay, 8/10.
it could have been more clear, though.
i’m not sure i really completely understand it.
but srsly guiz
WHO WAS YOU? or me.. or something.
I’m confused.
Basically the guy in the story did not meet anyone he was just talking to himself, hence the “I’m you” part
Interesting idea. If it was written more proper, it’d be amazing. To be honest though, the ending was kind of a let down.
So, what does death smell like?
also kinda fits in with the whole leather wings part.
NEVER MORE NEVER MORE NEVER MORE!
I like the idea of this one in that it has the potential to be a really good story, except that a lot of the ideas feel unfinished. I’m sure that if some more time were put into this then it would be a very satisfying pasta. Some more in depth explanation would be nice. :)
Good except for “I awoke one night the the smell of death” and “I’m you.”
At first it was really creepy, but now I’m slightly confused.
Hmm….Not great, or nothin’. The whole “I’m you” thing is comepletely overused.
Hmmm, phantom hourglass, where have I heard that before….?
Die in a fire, you can’t possibly defend this piece of shit “art” and if you’re the artist I strongly and urgently request that you KILL YOURSELF or learn how to take CRITIQUE.
Correction: It seemed to shift from one sort of but not really creepypasta to ANOTHER, DIFFERENT not so creepypasta.
It seemed to shift from one sort of but not really creepypasta to a not so creepypasta. WHAT? The “Nice to meet you. I’m you.” part would have been better had the plot been more well-structured/delivered.
I hate to (possibly) be the first one to say this, but I have read and reread it and I do not understand.
i think it means he went crazy and started talking to himself in the mirror or something
Very nicely written, but is rather confusing at the end.
i think it means he went crazy and started talking to himself
OHSHI-
Nice one, there O__O .. Sadly, I acidentally read the ending first, so no brix were shat this time. But I liked this one… 9/10.
And an obligatory: BUT WHO WAS ME?!
ummm not sure I care for this one. The idea is really creepy, but the twist at the end didn’t really freak me out, I kinda just rolled my eyes a little bit.
dunno is it me?
Decent
“I awoke one night the the smell of death”
who was the?
What
Oh…
Wait.
What?
I liked the way this one was written.
But the “I’m YOU! *dun dun duuuun!*” theme is so overused. =\
whoa
so it tore out my soul?
Wait…what?