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Mr. No-Good



Estimated reading time — 6 minutes

I had been living alone for over a year. The divorce was a difficult one but, since the scumbag ran off with another woman, at least I got the house. It was a modest ranch home with a lot of acreage, though surrounded by woods and the grounds were in serious need of repair. I had always wanted one of those husbands that cherished their home, mowed the lawn and liked to fix things. Unfortunately, he became more of a lazy bum that was more interested in the bottle. I could not really afford to hire anyone to fix up the place, so it just slowly started looking worse and worse for wear.

After the divorce I tried to fix things up myself. I weeded and worked my petite butt off to make a nice garden right in front of my big front bay window. It still did not look great; the beauty of the bright flowers was surrounded by rotted wood and unkempt landscape. At least I tried, and I was proud of my little garden. I tended to it every day. If I could not make the whole place beautiful, at least I had my one little spot that I could focus on, and block out all the muck that surrounded me (both literally and symbolically I guess).

It was only about a month or so after creating my wonderful “masterpiece” that I arrived home from the grocery store to trampled flowers. I dropped my bags filled with fruit and frozen items, and ran over to the sad looking little garden. “That no-good, worthless, nasty man must have done this!” I thought. He was probably trying to peek into my windows to spy on me! “No…” I then retracted “it was probably just some animals or something”.

The next day I went to the market and got myself a little border fence for my garden, only about a foot high. I placed it around the garden in front of my bay window, tended to the wilted plants that could be salvaged, and started it anew. There were no critters (human or animal) that could keep me from having this one nice thing!

Unfortunately, as time went on, every week or so I would or wake up to trampled flowers. Whatever was getting over that fence had to be pretty large…like a dog or…a 180 pound man. I would fix my garden every time this happened, but I was becoming more and more suspicious of my ex-husband. What could he possibly want though? He had moved on and moved in with his new tramp almost immediately, so why would he care what I was up to?

Then, one morning, I saw it. I walked out to get my mail and the flowers were trampled again, only this time I could see a boot print in the soil. I just knew it was that no-good, so-called man! He must be going through the garden at night to peer at me through the windows!

After seeing the boot print, I was so mad, I called him up and started to yell at him and demanded my privacy. Of course he claimed he did not know what I was talking about, but eventually he agreed to give me the privacy and to never come around again. Being the no-good man that he is, I didn’t completely believe him, so I got myself ready and went to the store immediately after hanging up the phone. I got myself some big curtains to that big bay window. Now, even if he came by again, he would not be able to see me.

A few days later when I saw the trampled flowers (even though I had to dig them all up and replace them this time since they were completely destroyed), I had to laugh because I knew he made the trip in vain and he could not see me this time! It looked like he had a fit too, because I had never seen the area so destroyed! I did not care this time though, because I had won! He thought he was being sneaky, but I found him out and foiled his plan…whatever that plan was. I then went back to the store and bought myself new flowers for my garden.

Everything was good for about a month or so. I saw no evidence of Mr. no-good spying on me. There was one thing though….

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Every night, before bed, I made SURE to close those curtains. Then, upon waking, I would sometimes find them open. I could only imagine that I had forgotten to close them the night before, with all the stress I have been under of course, but I could have SWORN I had always closed them. I shook it off though, and blamed it on simple forgetfulness.

Then, one morning, I woke up and opened my bedroom door to find the hallway rug covered in dirt. I followed the trail of dirt to my front door. I couldn’t believe it! That no-good man must have made a spare key before handing his over to me. At this point I was both furious and a bit frightened. Why is he so determined to spy on me? What could he possibly want? It must be the house! He isn’t happy in the trailer with his little tramp, and he is trying to find a way to get me out! At that point I decided I would change the locks, and if I ever sense, even in the slightest, that he is still spying on me, I will call the police.

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I changed the locks that very day, and felt content that Mr. No-Good’s spying days were finally over. Before bed I made SURE to close the curtains and lock all the windows and doors. The next morning, I awoke to nothing unusual. I opened the curtains and could see my beautiful flowers untouched and there was nothing in the house to indicate an unwanted visitor. If he had come by, he obviously realized what happened and went home!

I began my day as usual, and then went out to tend to my garden. From afar everything looked wonderful. As I knelt down to begin my work I noticed something unusual, it was a dead field mouse laying in the dirt. “Yuck” I thought and went to pick it up to dispose of it out in the woods that began a few yards from my house. As I went to toss the tiny carcass into the dark patch of trees, I noticed what looked like red paint on a few of the trees near where Mr. No-good had built his cheapo, and now run-down storage shed. Upon closer inspection, I saw some animal carcasses, like raccoons and possums, even something that looked like a deer.

My heart dropped into my stomach at this point. No coyote was making a meal here, it was definitely a person. Someone was living in that storage shed. My mind was racing as I ran back into the house. Was this who was watching me all this time? Who was coming into my home?

As I ran into my house and slammed the door behind me, the thought hit me. “Oh my God, he has been in my house” I said out loud. He could be in here right now. I knew at this point I had to make a decision to run outside to my car, or run to the phone that was in my bedroom and call the police. I did not feel safe inside my house, but I did not feel safe out there either. I decided to run to the car and get away. I would then find the nearest person or payphone to call the police.

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I opened the door a crack and looked out, it looked so peaceful, but I knew he was out there (or in here somewhere). Then I made a run for my car, which was about 25 feet from the house. I opened the car door, jumped in and slammed the door shut only to realize “You idiot, you don’t have your keys!”

That was when I saw him. I could see him in my rear-view mirror as he rose from the back seat and smiled at me. I screamed and he grabbed me, telling me that I had to be quiet, that no one could hear my screams anyway. He pulled me in the back seat, I could see the knife in a pocket holster and I reached for it. He got to it before I did, held it out, and told me that he just wanted to talk. He would never hurt me because he loved me. With no real choice, I listened to him, and I agreed with everything he said…. to humor him of course. I did not want to make him mad.

Now, I am living in a huge, beautiful home in a gated community in the suburbs. I could not believe when the police came to my door that night. They told me that my poor poor ex-husband and his sweet new wife were murdered in their sleep in their trailer a few miles away. Apparently there was some sicko, who had murdered his brother and his brother’s wife, that escaped from prison and he was living in the woods near my house. He had some sort of obsession with me, and had been stalking me. I couldn’t believe it! I suppose he went to kill my ex-husband because of his love for me. I just feel absolutely terrible, and the police even had to relocate me for my safety. They put me in this lovely new house, far far away from my old life. I have a huge house, a beautiful pool, a lovely grand garden, and a small little guest house in the back. Apparently the murderer is still out there somewhere. They fear he will still be looking for me, and so I always leave my door open just in case. I really can’t stand these new neighbors of mine.

Credit To – Bpaige

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28 thoughts on “Mr. No-Good”

  1. I upvoted you for your “old timey feeling” comment, as I completely agree with you. Referring to him as “Mr. No-Good” just makes me think of an older southern woman who deceives everyone around her into believing she’s a “good Christian woman.”

    To clarify, however, I did NOT enjoy this pasta. There was absolutely nothing about the story that I connected with. I found the main character abhorrent throughout the piece (even when it seemed the author was trying to make her likable). To top it off, it absolutely made me guffaw when the main character was relocated by the police “for (her) safety.” That doesn’t happen, children.

  2. Fuck, that was disgusting and awful. Please don’t ever post anything again until you’ve taken some writing classes.

  3. the ending really confused me :-( the story seemed a little too rushed and jumpy … can’t say i’m an overly big fan of this story however it wasn’t terrible – a few tweeks and it could be quite good

  4. So she was, apparently, excited that she gets her own killer to exploit for personal purposes that include murdering people she just doesn’t like. Wow, so who was the real monster? Either way, this story was okay but I felt the execution could have been a little better. The ended seemed to abrupt and I had to make sure I read the last paragraph right. And she never seemed in any real danger especially with all the exclamation marks. More like an thrill-seeker. Anyway, nice story overall- 6/10.

  5. I actually liked this story. I like how her and the stalker were both messed up in the head. Instead of doing the cliche “Oh please somebody help me, I’m being stalked” kind of story, you made the victim just as twisted as the stalker. I honestly don’t understand how people are confused. It’s obvious she is using the stalker to kill people she doesn’t like. Hence why she left the door open at the end, and stated she does not like her neighbors. I also think she got a guest house in the back, incase he returns and needs a place to crash. Good job aurthor. I think the twist was amazing.

  6. She was not a sad, terrified divorcee. Deep down she was sick and twisted and allowed the killer to murder people she did not like. Seems like she even put him up to the murder of the husband. And yes, she was like an excited teenager, which is why she left her door open for the killer in the end.

  7. I don’t know if it was the wording or what, but this pasta annoyed me more than anything else. It sounds like an 8 year old girl speaking, not a divorced adult woman. 3/10

  8. Wow… I’m sorry but I hated this. What even happened in the ending? It made no sense. The protagonist also annoys me, what grown woman calls someone “mr. No good man”? When I saw the title I thought it would focus around a child. It still felt like that anyway, though. The protagonist is just too naive and the wording is too childish for me to take any of it seriously. 3/10

    1. The stalker loves her, so he killed her ex-husband and the new wife at the narrator’s request. At the end, the narrator is hoping that he’ll show up again so she can use him to get rid of her pesky neighbors.

    2. That’s how I felt. If I thought my ex was creeping on me, I sure would be calling him a lot worse names than, “Mr. No good man.” Haha

    3. She was not naive just messed up in the head haha. Ive actually heard a lot of people use language like that that do not like to use bad language, like my grandma lol.

  9. The tone was too…”giddy”. The protagonist does not sound like a sad, terrified divorcee but an excited teenager thrilled to have a killer-stalker lover.

    1. I have to disagree. She was glad that she was divorced, because they had to have a good reason to be divorced. And for all we know, it could’ve been the wife that broke him with the man.

      1. Glad or relieved, whatever divorcees usually feel I can’t claim to be the expert of. But the point was that she did not sound like someone from the right age-bracket. Instead of a divorcee who may typically be in her late 20s, 30s or 40s, the writer failed to translate that matured/adult consciousness and made the protagonist sound like a teenager, as mentioned. Someone 13-15. I wouldn’t call anyone “Mr No-good”. That alone sounds like it comes from a 5-year old.

        1. I think the author portrayed her that way on purpose. I mean I’m not sure if you noticed or not but she was kind of touched in the head. In other words she isn’t exactly the most sane person walking around.

  10. I feel like this could have been good if it was conducted differently. It just didn’t flow well. Maybe it was the wording. And the ending was very predictable. If it was retouched a little, it would be very enjoyable! Especially because this could actually happen to someone. That always adds a creepy factor!

    1. The killer, kills people who gets close to “his” lady. Therefore she’s using the killer to get rid of people nearby, by keeping the door open.

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