It all started on the fourteenth night of March, the night of my parents’ 20th wedding anniversary.
It was a wonderful, sunny day, if memory serves. Surprisingly warm for before the beginning of spring. The beautiful weather was perfect for the atmosphere of the day – being married for twenty years is obviously a momentous occasion, so my parents had booked a table at our favourite Italian restaurant.
Of course, this was a formal occasion, so I had my best suit on. It was 5:33, and I was just straightening my tie when my phone went off – I’d received a message. That’s strange, I thought, that never happens. I checked the message: it was from my mum. It was quite a jumble of numbers and letters, but through the vocabulary stew I could make out one legible phrase: “Please help me.” It should go without saying that this worried me greatly, so I immediately replied, “Are you okay?” Just as instantly, I got another text which read, “Oops. Pocket text!” I sighed with all the relief I had and continued to prepare myself.
A few minutes later, I received yet another message, this time from my dad. I checked the text, and once again it was a massive mixture of letters and numbers, with the phrase “Please help me” concealed within. Creepy though this was, my dad was always a joker, so I presumed he was just joking around, until I was sent another text saying, “Oops. Pocket text!” Now this sparked panic. Pure, unmistakable panic. Exactly half a minute passed when I received the exact same two messages from my sister. This could not be coincidental. It just couldn’t.
In a state of sheer anxiety, I started to run to the restaurant. I made it about a quarter of the way before I was stopped by a police officer. “Main road’s closed,” he said, “Huge car crash.” This was the exact moment I realised just what had happened. I demanded to see the wreckage, a request which I was surprised was allowed. When I got there, it wasn’t the remnants of the car that caught my eye, nor the flames billowing from the destroyed vehicle. No. I was horrified to see the lifeless corpses of my mother, father and sister. I asked for the estimated time of their deaths – all three of them were killed instantly by the collision, at 5:32.
A minute before the very first text.
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I’m a big CreepsMcPasta fan, and he read this pasta a while back. I’ve been looking for this for forever and finally, I found it. I wish that I had found it sooner and that it still gave me the same feeling that it used to, but it’s quite okay that it doesn’t. I still love it!
Is no one else gonna question the fact that he said his mum sent the first text, then later said it was his sister?
This is creepy..I no a lot of ppl are reading to much into it..but I liked it..nice quick read :-)
Writer, hugest piece of advice; show, don’t tell.
Source: English major.
I think the writer wanted us readers to decide on what you think happen more than what actually happened . I dunno , just my thought , I liked it tho
I wonder if “Oops! Pocket text” is actually something phones do automatically if a jumble of text is sent. The phone might consider it a mistake and automatically justify the confusing message with its own additional message.
You guys don’t really seem to have a firm grasp on the story. What I think is the family members were asking for help and a ghost or demon was trying to kill them so I texted back pocket dial to keep from getting caught.
love this
I really admire works that can have such an impact in so short a space.
JtK isn’t worth the space it takes up on the internet.
wow.
My take on the story: The family died and tried to contact the author for help, but someone or some force was interfering which explains the gibberish. Then that someone or force sent the “oops, pocket text” to try and cover up the fact that the family had broken through to the living world.
This explanation makes the most sense.
This is a good one. Short, but it works well for a Creepypasta. 7/10
Aside from being disappointed with the length, as others have mentioned, and thoroughly confused by the “Oops! Pocket text!” messages, I thought this showed promise. It’s written well. I can understand the urgency (even reflected on later) as traumatic events tend to be remembered that way. There just wasn’t enough of it.
So did you make it to the restaurant on time…shame to let a reservation go to waste
The story starts out “It all started the fourteenth of March”, which implies that there’s multiple events or a series of occurrences of the same event…however, this story only details one event that occurred one time. The introduction should reflect that. “It happened on the fourteenth of March” or “It began and ended the fourteenth of March”. Also, the idea of ghosts sending a text for help could be kind of creepy, but the “pocket text” responses kill any creepiness and are just lame.
So is this current or reflecting? Overall good story; a bit controversial regarding events and such in my opinion, but I enjoyed it. 8/10
So if he was texted by ghosts, why’d they ask for help? They were dead. And if I were a ghost texting from beyond, I wouldn’t say something stupid like, “Whoops, pocket dial.” No, I’d be telling the person I chose to text how much I loved him.
Also, as someone else pointed out, the beginning of this story implies that this is a past event, yet by the end of the story, it feels like it’s happening right now.
I think the story has some other implication
It may. I’ll just chalk this one up to being not quite my cup of tea.
I think its one of the worst stpryi have ever read here…ryt there in the league with Jeff the killer
Oh, come on, it’s not THAT bad. I loathe that story. I think this just needs some reworking.
This is super creepy!
This doesn’t make much sense. They were in a car crash and sent the exact same text a minute after death? First off, why was it sent a minute after they died? And why did the pocket text message come after? It’s not that creepy, just confusing.
You’re missing the exact point of the story. If they were all dead, how on Earth did they send the texts? That speculation is what’s creepy
The texting might have been creepy except for the rather unbelievable second text that read, “Oops. Pocket text!”
I’d imagine if you’re texting beyond the grave, you’re going to make that text worth it.
You are really missing the point. You assuming it was the family that sent the texts. We know it isn’t them, and we are left speculating as to what it could be. It’s a real hit or miss, this one. You either get it or you don’t. Saying that, you should be a bit more open to interpretation.
Perhaps you’re right.
If they were all dead, why would they even bother sending the texts, and why would they bother with the pocket text message afterwards? Like Carol said, it’s a waste of what little time you have if the people were the ones sending the messages. If it’s not the family, then who was it? An EMT that wanted to spook you? If it was that, why would they send the pocket text? It’s either the dead family sending the text, or maybe an immature EMT that wanted to freak you out. Either way, it’s not creepy to think about.
What I’m gathering here is that you are completely ruling out any chance of the supernatural? Are you sure you know what website you’re on?
I’m not ruling out anything supernatural, because after all this is a website for horror stories. I just don’t understand why anything supernatural (angel, demon, monster, their spirit, a texting bear, whatever you want to put in that position) would waste their time shooting off random texts to people in the world of the living.
Hmmm… perhaps the family sent the first “please help me” message, before someone /something else tried to cover up what was going on, trying to convince the main guy that it was all a mistake. This of course, would have to occur beyond the grave or something. Tbh I’m not sure. I think the story is really a “what the fuck just happened” type story. It works for some, not for others.
That seems to make the most sense. I guess those stories just don’t do it for me (at least on this site)
Yeah that’s fair enough
there was a pasta about a man communicating w the lost via video game , so explain how the supernatural can’t use technology ??
Heaven must have really good reception.
This was really great at the beginning but was obviously rushed at the end. At the start, the narrator confirms that he is looking back from years ago. However, at the end the narrator sounds panicky, consistent with a Journal entry or thought, not a reflection. Overall, well done! No big grammar errors and a solid 7/10.
True that
This could have been longer. The writer seems very good! It was too formal for a handwritten entry however, and it quickly gained momentum that crashed at the end. Short, deserves 7/10.
Lol, crashed at the end literally.
Disagree, it was a perfect length. I’ve seen way too many creep pastas with:
“I put on my blue shirt and white pants, as I started down the hall I looked at several pictures that have nothing to do with this story, but I think it needs to be added in because stories should be long and I’m a touch too pretentious to be writing a story that’s saposed to just be creepy or scary.”
On the other hand I don’t get it, if they died in a car crash why would something text back “pocket dial”?