08 Nov The House
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"The House"Written by
Estimated reading time — 10 minutes
–VOICE RECORDING: TAPE 1 FEBRUARY 15, 2006; TOP SECRET; evidence for cause of death – Michael Mayback, Josh Horn, Kevin Mitchell–
Michael: Dude I don’t even know why we’re here. This is fucking stupid.
Josh: It’s only one night. Stop being such a fucking chicken. It’s not that serious.
Michael: Don’t you know in the movies when the people hear about something being haunted or dangerous but they still go? They end up dead you know.
Kevin: But this isn’t a movie. This is real life. We just go for tonight, sleep and get the money the next day. Easy.
Michael: Which is more important, money or life?
Josh: Michael shut the hell up and hurry up. Get your clothes and let’s go.
–30 MINUTE PAUSE–
Josh: Wow guys look at the place. It doesn’t even look that scary.
Kevin: They have a TV. And cable. Who wants to watch ESPN?
Michael: I don’t care how nice this place looks.
Kevin: Dude would you loosen up? It’s only one night. We’ll be out tomorrow.
Josh: Yeah. Stop being such a fucking pussy about everything.
Kevin: Let’s watch some TV. Just because I feel a bit bad for you, you can choose the channel Michael.
Josh: Yeah big Mike. Choose the channel.
Michael: Shut up. I hate it when you call me that. Gosh, you guys can be so annoying sometimes.
Kevin: No wait. Let’s go upstairs first.
Kevin: So we can see where everything is. You know, bathroom, bedrooms, that stuff. You aren’t scared are you?
Josh: Of course he is. Big Mike is scared of everything.
Michael: Shut the hell up.
–FOOTSTEPS; STAIR CREAK–
Michael: Okay I am not going down that hallway.
Kevin: It’s not that serious. Come on, who has to take a leak?
Josh: I do. Where the hell’s the bathroom?
Michael: I’ll just wait here. There is no way in the mother of fuck that I’m going down that hallway.
Kevin: You know what? If you want to stay, fine. Give the recorder to Josh. Let’s go. If we stay any longer I’m going to piss myself.
–FUMBLE; ECHOING FOOTSTEPS–
Josh: What’s Michael’s problem? He’s such a fucking scaredy cat.
Kevin: I don’t know. He’ll get over it. He’s always like that at first.
Josh: What are you going to do with that money when we get out of here?
Kevin: I don’t know. Sex, beer, drugs. What are you going to do?
Josh: I don’t know either. Show it off or something.
Kevin: There’s the bathroom. Who’s going first?
Josh: You are. Go.
–FOOTSTEPS ON TILE FLOOR; ZIPPER UNZIPS; DRIPS; ZIPPER ZIPS; FOOTSTEPS–
Kevin: Your turn.
–FOOTSTEPS; ZIPPER UNZIPS; DRIPS; ZIPPER ZIPS–
Josh: Holy crap!
Kevin: What’s wrong? What’s going on?
Josh: There’s like, a nest of ants over here in this corner.
Kevin: Ants? You made it seem like there was a dead body or something. The house is old.
Josh: They look weird. They’re bigger than most ants I’ve seen.
Kevin: Just get out of there.
Josh: Right. I’m already getting some major goosebumps. Let’s get back before Michael has a heart attack.
Michael: What took you so long? Gosh I thought something happened.
Josh: You always expect the worst. The bathroom is down there, so unless you plan to hold your pee the whole time, I suggest you get over you fear.
Kevin: Come on. Let’s go watch some TV.
–FOOTSTEPS DOWN STAIRS; TV TURNS ON–
Kevin: What are we watching?
Josh: Go to ESPN. Let’s see what sports are on today.
Michael: No way. Sports are boring. Why don’t we go to CNN and see what’s on the news?
Josh: Sometimes you can be such a loser. What highschooler likes watching the news?
Michael: This one.
Kevin: We can watch a movie.
Josh: Alright.Just make sure it’s not scary. Michael might wet his pants. Isn’t that right, big Mike?
Michael: We could watch a movie.
Josh: Hey stop. There goes the Terminator. Let’s watch that.
Kevin: It’s about halfway through. This is the part when Reese and Sarah meet.
Michael: We already watched this movie like ten million times. I already know what everyone is going to say.
Josh: Whatever Michael.
–TV BLARES; 20 MINUTE PAUSE–
Kevin: Dude what’s that at the edge of the TV?
Josh: what? I don’t see anything.
Kevin: Look. On the bottom right corner. Ew, it’s moving!
Michael: It looks like some giant cockroach thing. That’s nasty.
Josh: Oh I see it. Ew. Somobody kill it.
Kevin: I will. Here, hold the recorder.
–FUMBLE; FOOTSTEPS; PAUSE–
Josh: Why aren’t you killing it?
Kevin: Dude, that’s fucking creepy.
Michael: What is?
Josh: What’s wrong?
Kevin: The bug is like, it’s in the TV.
Josh: That’s not funny. Just kill it. You know I’m scared of bugs.
Kevin: I’m dead fucking serious. The bug is in the TV.
Michael: Let me see.
–COUCH CREAKS; FOOTSTEPS; PAUSE–
Michael: oh my god. How is that, how is that even possible?
Josh: Quit joking guys. Seriously.
Kevin: Come look.
–FUMBLE; FOOTSTEPS; PAUSE–
Josh: lord. Why is it in there?
Michael: I don’t know.
Kevin:What do we do?
Josh: Maybe it’s part of the TV channel. Give me the remote. Let me try changing the channel.
Kevin: I think it’s in there. It didn’t work.
Michael: Hit it.
Josh: I’m not hitting that. You hit it Kevin.
Kevin: No way. That thing is fucking creepy.
Michael: I’ll hit it. It’s not that serious.
Josh: Oh my god. It’s moving.
Kevin: That’s just nasty. Hit it again.
Kevin: What’s wrong with the TV?
Josh: Did you hit it too hard Michael? It’s brlinking now.
Michael: No. I just tapped it.
Kevin: Um, maybe we can just ignore it and keep on watching the movie. Can you do it Josh?
Josh: I guess.
–FOOTSTEPS; COUCH CREAKS; FIFTEEN MINUTE PAUSE–
Kevin: Dudes, do you hear that?
Josh: Hear what?
Michael: I don’t hear anything.
Kevin: Put the TV on mute. Hurry up.
Kevin: Listen up. I could have sworn I heard something.
–THUMP THUMP THUMP–
Michael: What the fuck is that?
–THUMP THUMP THUMP–
Josh: It sounds like it’s coming from upstairs.
Kevin: It sounds like someone is running.
Michael: Holy crap.
Kevin: Oh my god.
–UNKNOWN VOICE GIGGLES; PAUSE–
Michael: What the fuck was that?
Josh: Shit I don’t know.
Kevin: This is crazy.
Michael: We should just leave. Let’s go home.
Josh: No way. I need that money.
Kevin: Yeah. I bet there’s another TV up there. Nothing to worry about.
Michael: Don’t be stupid! There’s something up there.
Josh: Stop being so scared big Mike. It’s nothing dangerous.
Michael: You know what Josh? If you really believe that, why don’t you go up there yourself.
Josh: sure. I will. I’m not a fucking pussy like you.
Kevin: I’ll go too. I really don’t think it’s anything. This is reality, not a movie. You coming big Mike?
Michael: No. I’m staying down here.
Josh: Fucking pussy.
Michael: Look, I’m not a pussy. I’m just being smart. If there is something up there, I don’t want to find out what it is.
Kevin: That’s because you’re scared. If you weren’t scared, you’d go up there too.
Michael: fine. Just to show you that I’m not scared, I’ll go. But as soon as something comes up, of it seems too dangerous, I’m out of here.
Josh: oughta boy. Come on.
Michael: I have a bad feeling about this.
–FOOTSTEPS UP STAIRS; FOOTSTEPS DOWN HALLWAY; PAUSE–
Kevin: Look in there.
Josh: You look in there. Open the door.
–DOOR CREAKS OPEN–
Michael: It’s just a computer room.
Josh: I wonder if that computer works.
Kevin: It looks like its from the 1800s.
Michael: Computers weren’t invented back then, you idiot.
Kevin: Shut up.
Josh: Come on, let’s go to the next room.
Kevin: Okay it’s your turn to look Josh. Just open the door and poke your head in.
–DOOR CREAKS OPEN–
Josh: Holy shit!
Michael: What?! What’s wrong in there?!?
Kevin: Don’t have a heart attack Michael. What’s in the room Josh?
Josh: It’s like, some little girl’s room. There a lot of toys on the floor.
Michael: So why the fuck did you say ‘holy shit’ like that?
Josh: Why don’t you guys look?
–FOOTSTEPS TO THE DOORWAY; PAUSE–
Kevin: Gross. Bugs.
Michael: It’s like they’re eating something.
Michael: There are so many.
Josh: They look like the one in the TV. But smaller.
Josh: I’m sorry. I can’t stand bugs. Can you see the goosebumps on my skin?
Michael: Let’s keep going.
Kevin: So Josh, who’s the pussy now?
Kevin: I don’t think there’s going to be anything in this last room.
Josh: Me either. Those two rooms were all clear.
Michael: Weren’t you the one just freaking out over a nest of ants?
Josh: Shut your trap big Mike.
Kevin: Okay, I don’t want to open that door.
Josh: Why not? It looks like every other door in this house.
Kevin: I think something is in there.
Michael: Isn’t that what I’ve been saying this whole time?
Kevin: Yeah but I really think that there is something is there.
Josh: Pussies. Alright big Mike. It’s your turn to open the door.
Michael: Oh come on. Why me?
Kevin: Open it..
–DOOR CREAKS SLOWLY OPEN; PAUSE–
Josh: It’s only a bedroom.
Kevin: Are you crazy? It looks like Dracula’s bedroom.
Josh: Is this what you so apprehensive about? I thought it was going to be some weird shit.
Kevin: Well at least now we know that nothing was up here.
Michael: I don’t think so. So you’re saying that nothing ran up here, no one slammed the door, and no one giggled. We all just had a group hallucination.
Kevin: Well no. But now we know that it probably went somewhere else.
Josh: Let’s go back downstairs. The Terminator should still be on. I want–
Kevin: Dude,I just saw something move under the bed.
Josh: What? You saw something move?
Michael: I didn’t see anything. Okay, I know I was paranoid, but I don’t think a spirit or whatever would hide under the bed.
Kevin: I just something fucking move under that bed. I’m dead fucking serious.
Michael: Come on. Stop trying to scare us.
Kevin: You know what asshole, why don’t you look under there and see if the coast is clear?
Michael: Fine. I will.
–FUMBLING; THUMPS ON FLOOR–
Josh: Now put your head under.
Kevin: See anything?
Kevin: Are you sure? Say something.
Michael: Hello? Anyone there? You can trust me.
Michael: See? Nothing there. You’re the pussy, not — HOLY SHIT!
Kevin: What the hell is wrong with you? Why did you yell like that?
Michael: Something just fucking stroked my foot. I don’t what it was. It just stroked my fucking foot.
Josh: Okay, that’s not funny. Get from there Michael. Let’s just go back downstairs.
Michael: Something fucking touched me. I swear.
Kevin: Forget it. Let’s just go back.
–SHUFFLING; THUMPS ON FLOOR–
Josh: Now that you’re up, let’s go. I don’t want to stay here any — FUCK! WHAT THE HELL!?
Michael: SHIT! WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?
Kevin: MICHAEL MOVE YOUR FEET!! THERE ARE FUCKING HANDS GRABBING YOUR FEET!!
Josh: My god! They tripped him! They fucking tripped him!
Kevin: Grab his hands! Pull him up!
–HURRIED FOOTSTEPS; PANICKED SHUFFLING–
Michael: Guys? GUYS!!! HOLY SHIT SOMETHING’S PULLING ME!! IT’S FUCKING PULLING ME BACK:
Kevin: Josh, pull! God damn it, PULL!!!
–UNKNOWN VOICE GIGGLES; RUSTLING ON THE FLOOR–
Kevin: They’re too strong!! Josh PULL!
-NAILS SCRATCH FLOOR–
Michael: GUYS GET OUT OF HERE!! RUN!!
Josh: We’re losing him!
–DRAGGING; HEAVY BREATHING; UNKNOWN VOICE GIGGLES–
Kevin: Oh my god.
–RUNNING FOOTSTEPS DOWN HALL; DOOR CREAKS OPEN; SLAMS SHUT; PAUSE–
Kevin: We need to get out of here. It’s not safe.
Josh: Dude!! Something just dragged Michael under that bed!! He might be already dead!!
Kevin: Yeah well that makes one of us. We need to get our stuff and get the fuck out of here, or else we’ll be next.
Josh: What the hell was the giggle we heard?
Kevin: I don’t know, and I don’t care. I just want to home. Fuck the money! Let’s just go.
Josh: But, but what about Michael? He might still be, you know, alive.
Kevin: It’s either him, or us.
Josh: But, we can’t just leave him here.
Kevin: He told us to get away. We should listen to him.
Josh: I’m not leaving without him.
Josh: You can leave, but I’m going to save him.
Kevin: Okay. I’ll stay too. But let’s make it quick.
–CREEPING FOOTSTEPS; PAUSE; DOOR CREAKS OPEN–
Kevin: Okay, so now we have to look under the bed.
Josh: I’ll do it.
–SHUFFLING; THUMPS ON FLOOR–
Kevin: Is he there?
Josh: There’s no one here. It’s just an empty place.
Kevin: Get from there. Let’s go look for him.
–FOOTSTEPS; DOOR SLAMS–
Kevin: Where could he be?
Kevin: No. It’s a bit too bright and open down there. We would hear him go down the stairs.
Josh: So where?
Kevin: Let’s keep looking.
–FOOTSTEPS DOWN HALL; CREAKING–
Kevin: Look. It’s another door.
Josh: Think he’s there?
Kevin: It’s the only place left. He has to be there. Let’s go check it out. Here, I’ll open it.
–DOOR CREAKS OPEN–
Josh: Man, this is a big room. What was it for?
Kevin: Maybe it was a storage room. You know, to keep things.
Josh: Dude, do you see that?
Kevin: See what?
Kevin: Is that him?
Josh: I think so. Why is he crouched like that?
Kevin: I don’t know.
Josh: Hold the recorder. I’m going to go to him.
–FUMBLING; FOOTSTEPS THAT BECOME DISTANT–
Josh: Hey Michael.
Josh: Hey are you okay?
–FOOTSTEP AND PAUSE-–
Josh: Come on Michael. We can leave now. It’s going to — FUCK!!!
Kevin: What the — HOLY SHIT!!! WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT?!? JOSH!!!
Josh: Oh my god, MICHAEL!! Let go, please PLEASE!!
–FURIOUS SHUFFLING AND RUSTLING–
–HIGH PITCHED SHRIEK–
Kevin: Holy shit. Holy fuck. Holy…..holy SHIT!!!
–HIGH PITCHED SHRIEK; RUNNING FOOTSTEPS DOWN THE HALL; SKIDDING; DOOR SLAMS SHUT; HEAVY BREATHING; PAUSE–
Kevin: Okay, I’m just going to talk to the recorder now. So Josh went and grabbed Michael’s shoulder and turned him around. I’m in the bathroom right now and I’m scared as fuck. Oh my god I don’t think I’ll make it through this. Josh turned him around, and Michael, he, he looked like a monster. There were dark circles under his eyes. He had like, bruises all over his face and arms and, and he as deadly pale. His teeth were, were pointed. His eyes were rolled up. He opened his mouth, and all those little bugs crawled out them. They, they crawled out of his mouth and and his eyes and his ears. Oh my god, oh my god. Then he screeched like some kind of animal, and pounced on Josh, and bit his hand. Michael, Michael bit his neck and ripped the skin off. Oh my god.
–HEAVY BREATHING; DOOR OPENS; TIPTOEING FOOTSTEPS–
Kevin: I’m going to check it out. Oh my god.
–PAUSE; GASP; PAUSE–
Kevin: Oh lord. Fuck. Michael’s eating him. He’s ripping Josh apart. He’s, oh my god.
–RAVENOUS CHEWING; DRIPPING; RIPPING–
Kevin: Oh no. Please.
Kevin: Holy shit. He just, he just ripped the heart the out. He’s, he’s eating it. Oh my god.
Kevin: I just pulled my head out. I’m scared as fuck. I need to get out of here. I need —
–TEARING FLESH; SATISFIED GROWL–
Kevin: What’s he doing now? Hold on, I’m going to look one more time.
Kevin: Holy shit. Holy f —
–UNKNOWN VOICE SHRIEKS–
Kevin: HOLY FUCK. OH MY GOD!!!!!!
–RUNNING FOOTSTEPS DOWN HALL; UNKNOWN VOICE SHRIEKS; HARD THUMPING–
Kevin: HELP!! HELP!!! OH MY GOD, HOLY SHIT, HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
–HARD THUMP; CLICK–
Kevin: NO PLEASE! DON’T — AHHHH!!!!! HOLY SHIT HE’S BITING MY LEG. OH MY GOD, NO PLEASE.
–TEARING FLESH; UNKNOWN VOICE SHRIEKS–
Kevin: OH MY GOD. AHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!
–GIANT THUD; STATIC; PAUSE–
Kevin: Oh lord. He just threw me over the stairs railing. My legs are broken. Oh my lord. He bit me. He bit me and it ate a piece of my leg. Oh my god. It’s broken. I can’t move. It hurts like —
Kevin: I think he’s, oh please no. I think he’s coming down the stairs. I think he’s, oh no, PLEASE NO!!!!!!!!
–GIANT THUD; UNKNOWN VOICE SHRIEKS-
Kevin: OH GOD!!! HELP!!!! SOMEBODY HELP!!!!!
–RIPPING FLESH; GUTTURAL SNARL–
–FURIOUS RUSTLING; DRAGGING; NAILS SCRATCHING FLOOR–
Kevin: SOMEBODY HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
–SILENCE; TWO MINUTE PAUSE–
–THUMP. THUMP. THUMP; PAUSE–
–UNKNOWN VOICE GIGGLES–
Credit To: Keji