Scary Paranormal Stories & Short Horror Microfiction

Creepypasta

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Rating: 8.2/10 (385 votes cast)

A young couple were out driving through the woods late one night, down a narrow road surrounded by tall trees. The boyfriend was behind the wheel, when he suddenly looked uneasy and pulled the car over to the side of the road. He undid his seat belt and looked at his girlfriend.

“I have to do something, and I need you to promise me, whatever happens, you do not leave this car,” he said.

“What do you mean!?” she panicked. “Why are you getting out? Why can’t I come with you?”

He didn’t reply at first, but simply opened his door and got out, only before stopping to stare at her one last time. “Look, don’t worry, there’s nothing to be afraid of, just please promise me no matter what happens, you will NOT leave the car.”

“I promise.” She gulped. “But how long will you b-” He closed the door, leaving her there alone in the dark.

After 10 minutes, he still wasn’t back. She grew impatient and began fidgeting, as she tried to rationalize her thoughts. He had been acting so weird lately as if he was hiding something… always checking if they were alone, always asking exactly where she went, and now he goes and does this!? She began to wonder if she could really trust him.

Another 15 minutes passed and he still wasn’t back. She tried calling him, but he didn’t answer. She began to fill with worry. She undid her seat belt and wound down her window slightly to allow the cold breeze to roll in and help relieve her anxiety. Suddenly, through the open window, she began to hear a faint whimpering noise coming from deep in the dark woods. It sounded like someone in pain…

She thought for a moment about what she had promised her boyfriend, but decided to act on her gut instinct. After all he might’ve been hurt and needed help, and she wasn’t going to just sit there and let him die. She got out, and slowly built up the courage to creep between the trunks of the first two large trees and into the woods. “Hello?” she kept calling out, praying to hear her boyfriends reply.

She followed the whimpering sound for a few minutes, until she could no longer see the car headlights on the road. She was completely engulfed in the darkness of the woods, when finally she could see the source of the noise. There was a man tied up to the base of a tree with his head hung down, whimpering. The man looked somewhat familiar, but she couldn’t quite put her finger on it. He saw the girl and sat up in excitement and began pleading with her. “Your boyfriend is in danger!! Please untie me! They’ve got me and him trapped. Thank god you’re here, let me free so I can go save him!”

Simply hearing her boyfriend was in danger was enough, as she hesitantly untied the man who rose slowly to his feet and raised his menacing eyes to look at her. She knew she had seen this man somewhere before,  as his face contorted with a look of insanity, and a wicked smile grew across his cheeks as he ran off into the darkness.

Confused at what had just happened, and growing in dread, she slowly backtracked towards the car. Where was her boyfriend? Who was that man? Was he going to help her boyfriend? Why did he look so evil?

Suddenly her phone rang. It was her boyfriend, he seemed out of breath but was sounding safe and alive. “Look babe, everything’s going to be alright now.” He panted, “I couldn’t tell you before because it would have frightened you too much. You see, I’ve noticed that a man has been stalking you these last few weeks, and I mean a completely obsessive freak. He’s followed you everywhere. He’s been growing confident and has been getting closer too – a bit too close, I’ve been afraid of what he might do soon. So just today, I hid some rope and a knife out here in the woods. I knew if I came out with you he would follow, and sure enough I saw him running along in the darkness behind the car tonight. But its OK! I caught him and tied him up.”

She slowly turned numb as her mind processed the words in disbelief as they flowed into her ear.

He continued, “I think he’s been trying to get you for weeks, but he’s never had the chance. Thats why I’ve been making sure you’ve always stayed in public places for safety. I guess he thought tonight was it, but I outsmarted him babe! We’re going to be fine now! I just went to hide the knife then and we’ll call the police to come and take him soon. Sorry I took so long, is it cold in the car?”

She felt nothing. She stood there motionless and couldn’t move or talk.

“Babe? I’m coming back now. You’re still in the car right?”

She began hyperventilating. “I-I-I I’m so sorry, I-” but it was too late. She was cut off by the swift sound of a knife slicing through skin on the other end of the line, and the gasps of someone painfully choking to death. This was followed by a splattering sound that continued for a long time. She had just heard her boyfriend being murdered.

She was hysterical in her tears and thoughts, as she dropped the phone and frantically stumbled back towards the car like a disorientated zombie. She managed to open the door with her trembling hands as she crawled back into the safety of the vehicle and locked the doors. That’s when she realised she didn’t have the keys.

Credit To: Jack

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Rate This Pasta
Rating: 8.2/10 (385 votes cast)
The Promise, 8.2 out of 10 based on 385 ratings
  • https://www.facebook.com/betonunesneto Alberto N.

    very nice; just focus on the verbs like in the first 4 words (was instead of were), and disoriented instead of disorientated. Also could have been left without saying he was murdered, and left that open for our imaginations to wander, but overall nice pasta, great ambience and very intriguing story. nom, nom, nom

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    Rating: +7 (from 9 votes)
  • The Llama Amalume Sama

    Lol, this was great XD

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    Rating: +1 (from 5 votes)
  • PastaGirl

    Can’t believe no one commented on this… its really good..! :D
    Sounds so believable…BRING ME MORE!!!! :P

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    Rating: +5 (from 7 votes)
  • BUT WHO WAS BONE

    That’s what she gets for not being in the kitchen.

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    Rating: +12 (from 46 votes)
    • WhatisthisWinter

      DAMN IT WOMAN, STAY IN THE CAR.

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      Rating: +19 (from 25 votes)
  • Ryan

    I thought during the first half that this was a super enhanced, actually well written version of the short thing that spawned the Man Door Hand Hook Car Door meme. But it ended up being even better!! Great pasta.

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    Rating: +3 (from 5 votes)
  • Tony

    This story was sort of taken from another story ive read same beginning,and middle but ending and other small details. 3/10

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    Rating: -12 (from 14 votes)
    • Jack

      Taken from another story? No, I wrote this from scratch… Could you please share this other story, Im very curious! Thanks

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      Rating: +13 (from 15 votes)
    • http://hi.com Altair

      I thought it would turn out to be the “boyfriend is a werewolf”-cliché…

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      Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
  • Rail Heart

    He just happened to explain everything at that time and moment by phone? Sorry but it all just wrapped up too nicely at the end. Not to mention all the dick moves this guy just pulled with that stunt. 6/10

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    Rating: +6 (from 10 votes)
  • Candlejackass

    Great Pasta, but oh dear god, this girl’s boyfriend is a colossal dumbass.

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    Rating: +14 (from 14 votes)
  • Maria

    This was a very good pasta. However, it made me have to call up my boyfriend, just in case something would have happened; he hadn’t talked to me all morning, and after reading this, of course, I started freaking out. Anyway, he was okay, just sleeping. :D
    Once again, nice pasta.:D

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    Rating: -4 (from 10 votes)
  • J

    I really enjoyed the concept of this and I thought it was pretty well written. There is a however, though :)

    Most of the time I suspend my disbelief for pastas because you have to. In this case, I had some trouble. I didn’t understand any situation where the boyfriend would not tell the girlfriend what was going on. The girlfriend wasn’t tapped by the psychopath or anything so he couldn’t hear their conversations. The boyfriend easily could have explained things to her either before they got in the car or while they were driving to this remote location. He also could have found someone to go with them in a separate car, maybe one of his buddies…

    I don’t know I just imagined that in this scenario my boyfriend would have been much, much smarter. Then again, I would have stayed in the car like he said because I trust him unequivocally, and I most definitely would not have untied some dude that I didn’t know with “menacing eyes”. That’s just weird to me. Sorry!

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    Rating: +7 (from 7 votes)
  • Kitty

    This story makes me want some pie.

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    Rating: +10 (from 10 votes)
  • alice

    sequel? The ending was kind of left open for one. pretty please?

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    Rating: 0 (from 4 votes)
  • Arae

    If she didn’t have the keys the whole time, how was it she walked into the woods until she could no longer see the headlights?

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    Rating: +5 (from 5 votes)
  • Daulton

    Easy, the crazy stalker grabbed the keys.

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    Rating: +5 (from 5 votes)
    • Endoplasmic Reticulum

      But if there were headlights visible then the car was on.

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      Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
  • StoneH

    Women, huh?

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    Rating: -1 (from 9 votes)
  • http://creepypasta.com Dantaine

    well written story and i have to say it gave me the chills during the phone call.

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  • Cynnical Person

    I’m sorry but what would a knife slicing through skin sound like? If he had “urk”-ed or something, or a thud was heard, I’d think it was believable.

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    Rating: +2 (from 2 votes)
  • Anonymous

    please make a book this was greatttt :D

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    Rating: +1 (from 1 vote)
  • Castiel

    Learn
    your
    grammar

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    Rating: -1 (from 7 votes)
  • Omnom.

    But …. WHO WAS KNIFE?

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    Rating: 0 (from 6 votes)
    • http://hi.com Altair

      SHUT UP ITS NOT FUNNY ANYMORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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      Rating: 0 (from 2 votes)
  • http://creepypasta.com Chase

    Wow that sounds like slender man

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    Rating: -4 (from 4 votes)
  • Anonymous

    She dead

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    Rating: -1 (from 1 vote)
  • http://creepypasta.com Lola

    Wonderful pasta but the boyfriend was a huge dick, I mean, the chances of her getting out of the car would be much less high if he had just told her what was going on Jesus Christ and why did he take the keys?!

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    Rating: +2 (from 2 votes)
  • Rutabaga_machine

    Amazing pasta. I’ve heard variations of this same basic storyline before but this one definately takes the cake. 10/10

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    Rating: 0 (from 0 votes)
  • person

    I don’t get it

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