Enclosing
I’m so cold. So very cold. There is no warmth left in this room.
I suppose I should start at the beginning. It started about 2 weeks ago, back when I could still see the sun. I live alone, my parents kicked me out after I dropped out of high school…I always hated high school; the teachers, the kids, all of them…Every last one. They don’t understand you, nor will they ever. Friends…I scoff at the idea, they’re just people who act like they care, but turn around to stab you in the back. Deplorable.
As you can tell, I’m not a people person.
Although maybe it wasn’t their fault, considering my sickness.
Oh, did I not mention my sickness? I guess I spaced it. I’ve always had serious mental problems; as far back as I can remember. I get these…weird images in my head. Sick images…images of murder, sickness, and war. From what I’ve been told by people around me when I’ve had my ‘episodes’, mostly teachers, I spasm and throw myself to the floor, scratching and writhing at everything around me screaming all the while. Of course I don’t remember it, all I remember is the images…I doubt I will ever get any of them out of my mind. These ignorant teachers thought I was merely acting out, seeking attention as it were, as did my classmates. I hated them and they hated me, leading to many fights at school. I even sent a few kids into the hospital.
Ah, my youth.
I live in a dingy rental home in the slums of an unimportant city. My parents don’t visit me anymore, and none of my neighbors can stand being around me for more than a few moments. Nobody ever cared about me and nobody ever will, and I’m content with that.
Back to my current predicament; it was only last month when I saw a doctor about my episodes. He diagnosed me with a wide array of mental disorders, none of which I bothered to ask what they meant; all I knew was that I needed pills and he could give me some. I remember him handing me 3 or 4 bottles of pills or various shapes and colors, but I didn’t take them right away. I waited, thinking maybe, just maybe the images were caused by a troubled childhood, and maybe I had matured out of it, but sure enough in a few days, they came back. Suicide, bombings, and genocide this time. My mind was filled to the brim with disturbing, haunting images; these were some of the worst yet. I was already sobbing in the fetal position by the time my mind comprehended that I might be able to stop this. I couldn’t open my eyes, I didn’t want to see anymore. I remember crawling on my side towards the bathroom, shakily standing up and spilling open my medicine cabinet, spilling the assorted products on the floor. I grasped blindly for the unfamiliar shape of pill bottles, and soon found them. I ripped them open and threw them into my mouth, spilling many on the floor. I collapsed onto the cold tile, losing consciousness. This was a first.
Then, I woke up in my bed. I must’ve thought to myself that I got up and walked into bed, I just didn’t remember it. Maybe. Then it began: I was cold. With my heavy comforter, one of the few things I had invested my small amount of spare money into, should have kept me warm. I always found solace in sleep. I got up and walked into the living room and turned on my TV. Cable was out, should have known. How long had it been since I paid my bills? Still cold, I thought to myself. I walked over to the thermostat and cranked it up, hearing that old familiar sound of the heater pumping warm air. I sat back down, but 15 minutes went by, and I still was cold. I walked over to the heat vent, placing my hand over it; I couldn’t feel any warmth, I couldn’t feel any air coming from the vent, but I could definitely hear it. Ah, my bills, no wonder there was no heat. I could only feel the cold grate of the vent. But then why could I hear it pumping throughout the room?
Might as well call my landlord, I thought to myself, picking up the phone. Dead. “Doesn’t anything in this hell hole work?” I distinctly remember asking myself. It was one of the last things I remember saying out loud. How was I to know what was happening? I walked outside, I don’t remember if it was to grab the morning paper or perhaps to soak up some rays from the sun, but it was at this time I knew something was wrong. It was dead outside. I’m talking Sunday morning in the winter at 4:00 in the morning dead. There was no lights on in the houses, nobody walking outside, no noise. The silence was deafening, cliché as it sounds. I slowly walked back in, afraid to disrupt the perfect silence by too loud of a step. I hadn’t realized till I was back inside, but it was much colder outside then in.
The rest of the day went per usual, watching DVD’s for hours and reading. Only difference was the cold, which by my best efforts I could not stop. Then I went to bed, one of my last moments of peace, even though there was no warmth to be had. The next morning I woke up, against the blaring noise of my alarm clock. Work? No, much too cold. I put my hand on the dresser to turn the alarm clock when I felt it. Searing pain in my palm, my hand lurched off the dresser, bits of flesh ripping off. Cradling my hand under my armpit for warmth, I looked at the dresser. It was covered in a fine layer of frost. No, it wasn’t frost. It was too perfect. It was like….ice, like perfect ice. No cracks, no imperfections; completely perfect ice, nearly covering the entire dresser. Little bits of my skin and flesh were on the top, and a small amount of warm blood dripped from my palm. The warmth made me shiver, I had been so used to the cold of my house. Obviously I was disturbed. I don’t remember spilling a glass of water…no, definitely I hadn’t. I walked out of my room and went to check outside, maybe I could casually talk to one of my neighbors of the cold. Who was I kidding, they would probably throw their gardening item of choice at me and walk inside. Still, I needed to know why it was so cold. I placed my hand on the knob and jumped back. Frozen. I grabbed my comforter and gripped the knob, twisting with all my might. Nothing, not a budge. I threw myself against the door, trying to force it open. Luckily, my poor run-down house had a pretty flimsy door. it flew open and I stumbled outside.
Then I realized I couldn’t move.
My right shoe, the only shoe touching the sidewalk, was frozen to the ground. I could hear the sound of the ice forming the outline of my footprint along the ground. Alarmed, I pulled with all my might, barely ripping my foot free, and fell back inside. There was no wind, and yet the outside brought ghastly cold into my home, even the icy temperature of my house was better than the feeling of cold death outside. I stood up and slammed the door shut, leaving my shoe.
That was the last time I ever went outside.
Since then, everyday has been constant torment. The cold…my god its unbearable. Everyday a little bit more of my home is covered with that perfect ice…less and less of my few commodities can I use. My bed froze solid 2 days ago. Ive resorted to sleeping in the corner of my living room, but soon that wore thin, as my TV, couch, and walls were covered in ice. I didn’t eat for the first few days, terrified. Soon though, I realized I needed nourishment and ran to my fridge. I opened, and felt like a complete moron. How could I any of my food be edible? A fridge storing food at cold temperatures…in a home well below 0 Degrees. Smart. The food, fruits, meats, cheeses, about all I had left were covered in at least in inch of that clear, perfect ice. Almost like glass containers. I would spend hours chipping away at it, then stuffing the remains in my mouth, hoping I could survive just a little longer on the scraps.
Yesterday, my entire upstairs become covered in the ice. I can’t even reach my fridge, much less my door. I gave hope on human contact days ago. In the basement I fled, knowing I couldn’t avoid it anymore.
And finally, we’ve come to today. It’s coating the stairs, and the walls around me are closing in with the ice. I stopped shivering long ago, even my body realized that it’s over, my body systems and organs shutting down one by one. So here I am; trapped in the last bit of my home, my world, not covered in that perfect killer. I’m huddled into the fetal position, retelling this story again and again to myself. The ice is now literally just a few inches away. Huh. I never thought about it, but I’ve never actually watched the ice grow. It’s just covering more space every time I check. I look down and see the ice at my toes. Clever, while I was busy thinking of the ice never moving, it moves.
I’m fading in and out of consciousness, and every time I awake, I slip more and more into the cold embrace of death. Hah. I laugh mildly in my head at my ironic statement. My legs are now enveloped in the ice. At least there is no more running, no more trying to survive. I’m trying to smile but the muscles in my face won’t respond. The ice is now over my stomach and around my arms. I take solace in the fact that my eyes, and more so my mind will be the last to go. Oh, now it’s up to my chin. With the final movements of my eyes, I glance around at my glass coffin. So this is how it ends. My eyes fall back, looking straight ahead. No longer do I feel anything, the ice must be everywhere now.
I’m suddenly remembering the time I sent a kid to the hospital in a 2 week coma.
I pray to god that this is enough for St. Peter to reject my application into Heaven.
I hear Hell is much warmer.
Ba-dum tshhh
Hm…it’s an ok story
Not really scary though
It’s more like “ok he went crazy, slipped to another dimension and is now in a frozen grave”
This probably needs a little bit more story as to why he randomly has evil living ice in his life
Also, what happens when he gets covered in ice.
Is he doomed to live forever in this ice prison? or does he go to hell?
Overall, a nice pasta, worked ok and started fine
But it feels a little….cut off. You seem to have just written it and then ended
Well written, and while I wouldn’t say it was ‘creepy’, ‘disturbing and weird’ are both good matches. My first thought is that it’s a hallucination brought on by the pills, considering he just wolfed em down.
An enjoyable read, definitely Strange and Unknown… but as far as creepy goes?
I do like the bit at the end, about him wanting to go to Hell, simply for the warmth it would bring. Nice little tweak of his brain.
Also, even though this probably isn’t accurate:
FIRST, and BUT WHO WAS ICE?
Good pasta. I enjoyed it.
BUT WHO WAS FROZEN HOLOCAUST?
The last line is simply bone-chilling.But the other is pretty meh,I have read at least 20 others,but good effort nonetheless.
Yeah yeah it was good, but what was the point of going into detail with the episodes if they had nothing to do with the story?
Wow. I just liked the bit about hell being warm. Hehe. Nice.
This really is ’strange and unknown’. This pasta seems split into two completely unrelated halves- the first part dealing with his illness, then the second part about his icy death. The only link I can imagine is that somehow this cold was caused by the pills, but the doctor was given no special mention… I am confused.
I did think it was creepy but the two halves are too unrelated- like putting pasta with a curry sauce. Both good, but not together.
YAY! x3
Too long. The ice had creepy potential, but the size ruined it, as well as the unnecessary details. What does his childhood matter, beyond setting up the last line? And what’s the point of the pills?
Cool story bro
This is incredible… I want more
i really liked this one.
i didnt expect the person dying like that in the end. hah
I actually really liked the ending statement. Which is rare.
Very nice.
BUT WHO WAS ICE?
Sorry, couldn’t resist.
OM NOM NOM! Delicious pasta.
Not so much creepy, but still very good.
Only a few grammatical errors, and the way the story progresses is fantastic
Only one thing to complain about.
If the ice consuming him was all the way up to his chin, how was the narrator able to write this? Or speak it, if it’s one of those pastas?
That’s the only thing that bothered me about this one.
Just….not very scary to me. Well-written, though.
Wow…so that was kind of a vague ending…
I still liked it!
Hahahahaha
I approve.
was kinda weird but the last sentence clutched it
great pasta
Whoa o_o It was the pills I assume then?
…Was it the government trying to kill him off or something? Im still kind of confused, but this was a very delicious pasta.
okay this one makes zero sense
Good story, although there’s no explanation for anything. To be honest, who was ice?
Work on the ending definitely.
Nice!
hmmmmmm.
long, but not really creepy.
wot
first
That was fuggin awesome.
It was decent enough. I’d love to know how a high school drop-out can afford to rent a two-story house.
Wow… I love this
The last two lines gave me chills.
I liked the writing, but it didn’t creep me out.
Could have used more description to fill it up, it doesn’t leave you with much.
l don’t get it.
Interesting, but doesn’t explain where the “ice” came from!
Nice though.
that’s a really weird concept; a crazy person all alone freezes to death. it brings up a lot of questions. I liked it!
Good concept, horribly organized, and leaves everything unresolved. What does part A have anything to do with Part B? Why did the world suddenly freeze? How was he able to write all this if everything was supposedly frozen?
6/10. Valiant effort, but noticably lacking polish.
Awesomely creepy, I love it. And I love the ending, definatly not what I was expecting.
holy shit thats the best and deepest story ever
not creepy but I loved it
Complete waste of fucking time, what a shitty story
What a waste of time
hm well i applaud the idea of the world freezing over and him falling into the embrace of death… sadly i expected somthing worse like him waking up from the pills having hundreds of people dead again i applaud the idea good job… kinda
Whoa. I am sad.
I don’t understand the point of mentioning the sickness at the start of this pasta. I assumed that it would have to do with the conclusion, but… it seems not. Unless this person is so sick in the head he thinks everything is frozen? Is this an actual occurrence or is he just imagining it? It just seems like a huge plot hole to me… I don’t very much like this pasta :/
LOL?
it was kinda like a really long, drawn out anecdote with a loljokelol ending…
it was a lil too long for me, not that i mind long stories, this one was just like.. long,slow predictable buildup that i just skimmed through.
so…umm. idk.
I heard Mongolia had bigger schlong than Miami.
Either way, I like it. Yummeh.
1st!
what the fuck did the entire first half of the story about him/her having flashbacks and such?
This pasta sucked balls
That had good potential, but was three storylines in one.
That was very cool.
First. I actually liked the story; the writing was pretty good and the ending was how a story SHOULD end. The story didnt make much sense however, it was like the first 3 paragraphs were a waste of my time, because it had nothing to do with anything. Maybe there is a connection that I’m missing, but it either needs to connect with the story, or gtfo.
I’m not quite sure why this was written in the first place. It’s not creepy, it’s hardly entertaining, and you pretty much just said “The ice covered more. And then, later, it was covering more. Damn it’s cold. And now there’s even MORE ice. And it’s cold. With more ice.”
Repetitive, not creepy, and boring. I normally don’t let spelling or grammatical errors ruin a story for me. Well, this story ruined this story for me, but if it hadn’t, the way it was written also bugged the crap out of me. Certainly not my favorite pasta. 4/10
It’s definitely pasta. Creepy, not so much.
very unique pasta, ending did seem a bit rushed.
Um, what? That wasn’t even slightly creepy.
First comment-
this wasn’t creepy at all. just pure stupidity.
Gay.
But why was he having visions?
Or is that just a random little detail to throw us off? o:
And yes - it’s a comment that starts with “but” and doesn’t contain the words “WHO” and “WAS” immediately afterwards.
I hope I didn’t just cause the apocalypse.
Good pasta but little bit boring.
Hmm, pretty good. Not really creepy, but an interesting idea.
I really, really like it
I fucking loved it!
…and what about the sickness? good pasta, but the twist from “omg i see death and decay” to “everything frozen” is a bit weird. wasn’t creepy, but nice to read.
BUT WHO WAS ICE?
Interesting. I liked how you didn’t fuck around with the concept - got straight to it. Definitely could have explained how, as soon as apocalyptic visions disappear, the whole world is covered in ice. That makes no sense at all.
In that aspect, it was incredibly shit.
Meh.
shit, son
This was absolutely awful. Too long and tried way too hard to be interesting, any potential fear was killed by the author’s literary masturbation. It starts off with someone seeing images in their mind, then all of a sudden they slowly freeze to death because a mysterious ice is growing over everything? What.
This was absolutely awful. Too long and tried way too hard to be interesting, any potential fear was killed by the author’s literary masturbation. It starts off with someone seeing images in their mind, then all of a sudden they slowly freeze to death because a mysterious ice is growing over everything? What.
that would suck
its kinda disjointed, i dont really get how it transitioned from taking pills to everything freezing, except maybe this person was unconscious for a really long time? but then how are they alive? its a little odd…
Twisted. It’s good.
I liked this one. wasn’t really creepy, but it’s winter where i am and I’m quite cold now wich gave an added effect.
ha, ha, I really liked the last line.
wow!i really liked this one….very descriptive and emotional….filled with pain tho….i liked it on that level as well..oddly enough
I think you had a good start but things just didn’t seem to mesh well together. You had the element of his visions and then the cold, but nothing seemed to really tie the two together. And it wasn’t really creepy.
Made me wonder whether the ‘cold end’ was really the end of the world, or just another of his strange illusions, accompanied by the large amount of pills slowly killing him off…
Who knows.
>The last line is simply bone-chilling
>simply bone-chilling
>chilling
OH, YOU.
And I really like it, especially the last line…
I appear to be the only one, but I didn’t much enjoy this. TL;DR.
did he go in a coma? did he take the wrong pills? did he take too many of his pills? we need answers!!!!!!!
Too long, not creepy, and not well written. If I’d read it somewhere else, and it had had a little better proofreading, it would’ve been great.
You could explain it as just another drug overdose, but the things that happen to you during those just can’t be pleasant.
Just like this pasta, unpleasant.
The way I got everything was that the pharmacist or whoever gave him the wrong pills or the wrong dose of what he was supposed to take (or just the sudden OMNOM of the ones that he could get), which lead him to hallucinating about the ice and the constant growing. And for the ending I thought it was more all in his mind, like a dream but not, instead of reality, and since no one really thought to check up on him, the hallucination got the best of him and he died of starvation or insanity.
Wewt!
Good story, I thought. Descriptions were fair enough, considering how he was alone for so long and boredom can cause someone to linger on details when there’s not much to do. I like how it gave us room to question and make our own connections and assumptions.
TL;DR
I really liked this pasta. Not especially scary but there’s a real sense of desolation in it, I could imagine it perfectly in my head
BUT WHO WAS ICE?
I was cold while reading this.
… ‘Cause I was drinkin’ a Slurpee.
Meh.
Oh, yeah, by the way. I forgot to mention all the other stupid things in your story. “How could I any of my food be edible” was probably my favorite line, not only because of the horrid way it was written, but also because you’re an idiot. Food kept in your refridgerator would be the same temperature as it always would be, because they’re insulated. People in subzero environments keep pretty much everything they don’t want frozen in a refridgerator for that exact reason.
I really liked it, though the events could have been more… connected.
And about the curry and pasta comment… mothafocka please, r u 4 reelz?
I’m confuse
He probably took the wrong pills from the medicne cabinet like my grandpa. Me and my family have to beat him so hard for him to snap out of his fits.
he did the whole pasta to build up to hat punchline at the end
am i the only one that thinks this is about an overdose? he slams abunch of pills down then he passes out hallucinates, gets cold and dies. does this sound plausible?
tl;dr
but.. WHAT WAS JOB?
he didn’t mention anything about co-workers.. D;
Uhm. The plot of this story went waaayyy off topic, therefore losing it’s credibility to be creepy :3
Made no sense whatsoever.
Although, I do like the closing lines.
this doesn’t make any god damn sense. “oh i have nightmare visions! oh my house is encased in ice!” uuh? plus it could do without the HIGH SCHOOL WAS HARD NO ONE UNDERSTOOD ME I AM ALONE BAWWW shit, too.
The beginning strayed away from the main point a bit too many times. The rest was aiite.
Say No to drugs.
This reminds me of an episode in spongebob when he got the suds. Though the horror of having patrick with him might be a bit worse than the story teller’s experience. Heh.
I get that they spilled pills on the ground, now.
As many others have said already, the first part about the episodes and the “troublesome youth” were irrelevant and trite, respectively.
The episodes don’t play into the whole “ice-covered house” thing, unless the pills are suppose to make you hallucinate something awful (which would be negated after a while since he seems to be going through more than a few days, where the pills affects would wear off unless he was stupid enough to keep taking them).
And everyone has a troubled childhood. That is what it is like being a kid. No one understands the way you think, everyone is against you, blah blah teenage angst blah blah. If the kid grew up without a face, or without ever having a full meal to eat each day, or getting molested by his dad, THEN he really had a troubled childhood. Otherwise, he was just another whiny lil pissant in a high school.
Now, the iced over house thing could have been good, had some logical thought pattern been followed - none was, however. Guy just wakes up and suddenly shit starts freezing. And freezing. And freezing. No clue why it started, no sign of it ending, and NOTHING else happens except cold. Gets dull after about four sentences of “then something else was frozen.”
Also, this story shows a strong lack of knowledge about a lot of aspects of things freezing. Like ‘Sama’ pointed out, stuff in the fridge would not have become frozen unless guy left the door open, which would have just proved he was a moron. Also, the ice seems to be freezing things in random intervals. Why would his dresser be frozen, then his door, but then LATER his TV and couch are frozen? A television, a couch, and a dresser would be frozen at around the same time, while the door would be most likley frozen sooner as it is thinner and gets colder faster. He also has his walls frozen, then his stairs. Again, they are part of the structure of his house, but stairs are hollow underneath them, while walls have the floor underneath them (heat rises, hence ‘Bridge ices before Road’ signs).
Lastly, I have one big issue with this pasta, as well as others that play out like this. If he doesn’t pay his bills, and his house is freezing, how in the sweet sweaty hell is he typing on a COMPUTER with an INTERNET connection? His net and his PC should be either dead from lack of paying the bills, or frozen like a rock when his dresser, TV, and couch went. Also, his arms freeze, then he says the ice is to his chin. If his ARMS are frozen, so are his HANDS. Therefore, how on earth is he typing all the rest?
For god sake, people, think before you write. Keep common sense in mind, and have someone else proof-read your story for spelling, grammar, and just plain stupid mistakes.
0/10
i loved it, honestly I don’t see why people are hating this story so much!
i really like it !!!
This lost my interest in the first paragraph, but I couldn’t read anymore past the second. Who seriously writes this way?
interesting. it’s a good story, not particularly creepy though. well written.
however, if you hadn’t paid your bills in a long time, how could you watch DVDs? just wondering.
Delicious pasta is delicious.
BUT THEN WHO WAS ICE
i wanna fuck teh author
…Incorrect identification of irony is stupid.
Terrible writer is beyond fucking terrible.
I like it. One of the more unique stories but it uses very few elements to complete the story.
There is no connection at all between the schizophrenia, the medication and the ice world, and even the supernatural does not allow for non-sequiturs. Just delete the first half of the story, up to the moment he loses consciousness. That, or waste a few paragraphs on explaining the phenomenon.
The punchline of “I pray to God that I go to hell” is nicely done though.
I liked it…I wasnt creepy but it was very interesting.
The ending was very clever
well he needed powerful medications for his insane sickness, along with the fact he takes a handful.. LEADING TO OD… he is ODing, and withing minutes or seconds, he, in his mind, is living out his final moments in days… and nobody saves him…
tl:dr his parents will find his dead ODed body on the next visit
I liked this one.
I’m especially fond of how he wanted to go to hell because it’s warmer. That’s kinda funny. 
same thing a lot of people said, the ending is GREAT, but the ice and illness in the beginning seem totally unrelated.
someone going mad then dying isnt very scary or original…
GUH. 2/10.
I liked the first part.
Then I liked the second part. Kinda.
You’re just one short of having Neapolitan pasta.
The first part, while emo, involves crazy people, and that’s ALWAYS fun.
The second part seemed like it could be fun. It wasn’t, in the end, but the idea that it MIGHT kept me going.
I hope this is one of your first attempts, but this was very poor in the end. Cliched character, spotty setting, subpar everything and it ends with nothing to be gained. So some dude is nuts and thinks hes freezing to death… then he does. Big deal.
HOW COULD HE TYPE IF HE WAS FROZEN???
It’s an unreliable narrator. The author established him to be crazy, and then crazy things start happening to him. I like it, nothing to complain about here except that he was typing up a story describing his frozen-ness while being frozen solid.
Call me crazy, but I liked it.
Cool story, BUT THEN WHO WAS MOISTURE NEEDED FOR ICE TO FREEZE?
Pills killed him, thus why nothing worked. His personal hell was dying in the ice, with nobody else around.
Seriously, it’s pretty obvious to me.
Thus the “hell is warmer” is fucking hilarious, since he’s already ~in~ hell, and it’s freezing.
LOL I liked this even with its flaws. Its mildly interesting and imparted a pleasing picture in my mind of a frozen house.
sucks for him XD
I can’t say I’m terribly impressed by this.
The flashbacks and childhood memories seem to have nothing to do with the rest of the story. They are, however, a little cliche. “Everyone hates me because of what is wrong with me, and no one believes me” has been done a million times over.
The story is a little unorganized, as well. It jumps from one thing to the next, and you’re left pondering what the hell is up with the ice. My one other qualm about this piece is in the pill popping scene: how many damn times do you need to use “spilling”?
There was one aspect that I really did like about this, though. Like other people have suggested, maybe the ice came from the pills….. but my take on it?
Maybe the ice was just a hallucination.
not by any extent creepy, but a deep story that conveys the story of the main character quite nicely
Some effort was put into developing the character, which I can’t say too much of the other pastas I’ve read, and it’s obvious how much love (or perhaps torment) went into this.
Congrats.
Grade A stuff you got here.
In Soviet Russia, frostbite gets YOU!
Reminds me of this IF called “Shade” where you’re a guy (possibly mentally ill) holed up in a one-room apartment and everything starts turning into sand.
Only with ice instead of sand.
To all of those who keep complaining about how the story could have possibly come out,
It doesn’t matter how it could get out. I mean first of all it’s not even real and do you think that if it were real, they’d post it here? Let’s all think. If you were trapped in the cold and even if you hadn’t payed your bills or no power, whatever reason you like, you wouldn’t post it on a website where people won’t believe you otherwise. You’d email it to police, or the news or something.
And let’s face it, you wouldn’t go through the trouble of writing it into a story and start about your mental illness either. I guess it would be something along the lines of
“GET ME THE HELL OUT OF HERE!!”
btw:
I liked your story.
Greetings,
Smiles
Then John was the ice monster.
Emo school drop-out with schizophrenia sees the world getting covered in ice for no fucking reason.
That story is fucking shit, and the writing is terrible as well.
2/10
Are all of you people completely unable to read beyond the actual words?
He obviously over-dosed on the medication.
He died.
Due to his actions he went to hell.
Hell apparently isn’t cold, and he doesn’t know he is dead.
He wants to go to hell and be warm but he’s already in hell.
UndeadEditot, I was going to post the exact same thing.
Gotta say Undead hit the nail on the head. Was gonna post myself about the fact that overdosing on the pills and his hateful and lonely behavior caused the ice to form. The last line being a huge hint as to the fact that he is in hell. All in all I really liked it.
Reads like a livejournal entry. Creepyfailsta.
QQ fucking emo kid. That was enough to make me hate this thing to begin with. “Oh, nobody understood me, I’m a snowflake.” Seriously, the way it began had all the airs of somebody still fucking IN high school.
Grammatical and how things freeze shit aside, it needed a clearer transition of the first part to the second. Maybe something as simple as adding in how many pills he took. I don’t know. Fuck.
I AM CONFUZ.
I have no idea what to say, besides I like it.
The ending made the whole pasta worth it.
so he saw the future, human war, drugged himself comatose, and slept throught the beginnings of nuclear winter? poor dude, shoulda just lived with the dead-o-vision.
This pasta is simple, the guy is a schizophrenia, his mind is playing tricks on him and convincing him of the ice.
That’s what schizophrenia is, mind games, that’s why people do things that look strange, because what they’re seeing and sensing is different from what’s actually happening.
He was destroyed by his own mind that, for some reason, convinced him he was being froze to death.
Mental illness in it’s perfect illustration.
P.S. his condition got much worse because he fucked up on the wrong medication.
Huh. :S
My imagination of this was that he was psychically predicting a nuclear war, and he was the only one who survived it somehow. Sort of a Twilight Zone kind of thing. The OD’ing makes more sense though.
But I don’t know why everyone’s rating this so low. When I think about it, all the parts fit; He has visions of gory, bloody stuff, that makes him an outcast, so he overdoses on pills to get rid of them, which leads to a deserted, frozen landscape, which he is used to, in a sense, because nobody liked him because of the visions.
That’s just my thoughts on it, though.
8/10
I think the ending is sort of like his hell, because he killed himself from taking so many of the pills. Great pasta
Darn, I really wanted a reply along the lines of
“What a happy Fourth of July”
To imply that it was, like, summer and that he was going crazy.
the ice is a metaphor for his isolation how the evils of humanity have cause him to become cold and this made him freeze up eventually
actually i think what happened was that he/she died from taking so many pills and that this was their personal hell but they didn’t know about it