Scary Paranormal Stories & Short Horror Microfiction

Creepypasta

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The hitchhiker Andy picked up on that July afternoon was one of the stranger people he had met. She had, after warm thanks for stopping, and a moment or two of silence, proclaimed herself to be able to grant a wish. The conjuration she had performed in support of this was quite remarkable- once the sound of the cymbal had stopped ringing in Andy’s head, he was quite impressed.

Now Andy, good Christian that he was, was always of the opinion that you should do a good deed for its own sake, and not for material reward. He lightly waved away the images of wealth or power that the girl suggested. “My one wish, young lady, is to get you to where you’re headed!”.

The girl’s face contorted with fear as darkness fell outside.

//
Credited to Ultra.

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Rating: 6.2/10 (142 votes cast)
A Long Detour, 6.2 out of 10 based on 142 ratings
  • lulzfish

    To Hell?

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    Rating: +1 (from 3 votes)
  • Anonymous

    Hell?

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  • Anonymous

    huh

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  • http://channelislandsghosttrackers.com Deathbecomesme

    I really like this one…short and sweet and to the point….

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    Rating: +8 (from 8 votes)
  • Xanian

    Perfect. Just perfect.

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    Rating: +4 (from 4 votes)
  • Anonymous

    wait, what?

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  • G-O

    What exactly happened? Did the wish end up transporting them into outer space or something?

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    Rating: +1 (from 5 votes)
  • Pastamancer

    Nice. It’s worded a bit obtusely around the last few sentences, but it’s a classic premise.

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    Rating: +1 (from 3 votes)
  • Popkornchu

    I don’t really think I understand this one… Somebody explain? :/
    Andy’s also my boyfriend’s name. Great. -_-

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    Rating: +3 (from 5 votes)
    • Jeffisthebest

      The lady was going to hell but she didnt expect him to say what he did so they both are going to hell

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  • Creepy Mole

    Sounds like one of those good ol’ short creepypastas. Long time no see, it’s appreciated, though very vague.

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    Rating: +1 (from 3 votes)
  • HooFlungPoo

    Wow, I expected WHO WAS PHONE???!?!?

    This was eccelent, for a short story, and to those of you who didn’t understand the ending:
    I believe that the girl, would probably vanish after the wish was made, meaning, that she had no destination, and that if she were bound to her wish…
    Well, you get the point.
    7/10
    Pros:
    Good Writing
    Short
    And a little eerie.

    Cons:
    A little too short to get into, therefore the ending lacked luster; however, it reminds me of this one:

    An elderly man was sitting alone on a dark path. He wasn’t certain of which direction to go, and he’d forgotten both where he was traveling to and who he was. He’d sat down for a moment to rest his weary legs, and suddenly looked up to see an elderly woman before him. She grinned toothlessly and with a cackle, spoke: “Now your *third* wish. What will it be?”
    “Third wish?” The man was baffled. “How can it be a third wish if I haven’t had a first and second wish?”
    “You’ve had two wishes already,” the hag said, “but your second wish was for me to return everything to the way it was before you had made your first wish. That’s why you remember nothing; because everything is the way it was before you made any wishes.” She cackled at the poor man. “So it is that you have one wish left.”
    “All right,” he said, “I don’t believe this, but there’s no harm in wishing. I wish to know who I am.”
    “Funny,” said the old woman as she granted his wish and disappeared forever. “That was your first wish.”

    Good one though.

    This is probably going to be the longest comment that this story gets.

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  • KatieBug

    I enjoyed this. Short and to the point. Pretty good. Could\’ve used a little more detail. 8/10

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  • Eric

    It’s been awhile since I heard such a short Creepypasta. These can actually be quite effective as this one was decent. It works that it tells you nothing about what is happening. You are left to yourself to think about the implications afterwards. While not that creepy, still fairly decent. I give this a 7/10.

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  • JohnDoe

    so the girl was really headed to an abyss?

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  • Marikvulpina

    wow, I really like this. short, sweet, and a nice subtle implication of a deal with the devil gone horribly wrong…for the devil.

    still, though, wishes usually have a price. i wonder what the price he has to pay to “get her where she’s going”?

    maybe he has to take her.

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    Rating: +3 (from 3 votes)
  • anon

    would it have killed him to be a little bit more literal? I mean, hasn\\\’t he ever even heard of a wish situation gone bad before? Dumbass!

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    Rating: -2 (from 2 votes)
  • 0.o

    Hmmm…not quite scary, and I’m not sure if it’s implied that she went to hell, or if she was already a demon…

    But, all in all, a good amibigous story. Not creepy though.

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  • MaraquanWocky

    Wait, didn’t I see this on another website?

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  • Flash37

    OMG I’M *bleep*ING FI- NOOOOO

    Does not understand ending. ;;
    I love short pastas for their creepiness, but for some reason I can’t wrap my head around it. What is she… Ohhhh wait, does this mean that they’re forever stuck in the car? Or she’s some sort of demon that only turns into a demon at night? Or what?
    I like the originality though<3
    7/10

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  • Jazzy the Man

    Needs more detail, otherwise it\\\’s too short and doesn\\\’t inspire much emotion and the ending is just \\&quot;wait wut?\\&quot;. Feels way to rushed and confusing.

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  • Anonymous

    FIRST

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  • http://www.creepypasta.com sharaaa(:

    wat

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  • Someone else

    Lolwut?

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  • Garbledina

    So no fixing the problems in africa? No world peace? Okay, that’s fine.

    That’s fine :(

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    Rating: +5 (from 5 votes)
  • kenr

    I liked it. She seemed like a nice wish-granting girl, but when he makes a polite wish that she get to where she is headed, then it seems like she was headed to hell, or the underworld, or some such place, implying that she was some kind of demon or evil entity.

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