Scary Paranormal Stories & Short Horror Microfiction

Creepypasta

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Rating: 7.6/10 (450 votes cast)

I was always known as the weird girl; the one with no friends, strict parents, and strange habits. I was an outcast in part because I ate hot sauce sandwiches and sleepwalked. School days were long and torturous. There was nothing good about middle school. The worst part was definitely the ridicule from the “popular” crowd. They roamed the school in a pack, infecting others with their hatred and prejudice. I tried to avoid them, but they always tracked me down. They could have been bloodhounds. As fate would have it, one school day I met a new girl, Ella. The best part about her was that she had no clique, yet. All the groups were vying for her attention. She was everything the popular crowd wanted: outgoing and fashionable. Ella was relatively good at sports, which left the jocks clamoring for her attention. She was also apparently rather intelligent, so the nerds stared longingly at her, hoping that the force would bring her to their side. However, one day at lunch, she sat down with me. At first I thought she was going to try and take my sandwich, so I smiled to myself, imagining what a surprise she’d get if she ate it. When she actually introduced herself to me, I was even overjoyed. I had made contact with a human and I still had my wonderfully delicious hot sauce sandwich. Over the next few weeks, we would become friends. Finally one day she said, “Want to come over to my house for a sleepover, Chloe?” I didn’t know how to reply, I had never been asked to a sleepover before. That was something for people with friends. “Let me ask my mom.” I replied, the typical answer of a twelve year old. It took some begging and persuading for my mom to allow me to go. She kept saying that I would scare my first friend away if she found me sleepwalking in her house. I wasn’t too worried about it, though.

Finally, I was at my first sleepover. Ella and I watched movies, giggled and built a fort. It all seemed like something out of a movie. Around two in the morning, we had the bright idea to film a vlog entry. Sitting on our makeshift beds, we chattered away at the camera until we slowly dozed off into a land of sleep. When we arose the next morning, we realized we had left the camera on all night, filling up its memory. “Let’s watch our vlog entry now!” exclaimed Ella, still a bit groggy. I yawned, about to agree with her and stretched. I felt really sore, like I had been working out. Suddenly I realized that I must have sleepwalked during the night—that was the cause of my soreness. “No, actually, let’s not watch it now. Let’s wait until high school graduation to watch it. It will remind us of what we were like when we were this age.” Ella reluctantly agreed.

It was four years later and so much had changed. I was no longer the outcast, Ella and I had acquired a large group of friends that seemed to be ever expanding. Sleepovers were now a regular occurrence, though we had never made another video blog since the very first one. Ella called me the day before high school graduation, “Chloe, let’s have a sleepover and watch our vlog. I’ve been dying to see what ridiculous things we said when we were younger.” I agreed, she wouldn’t abandon our friendship now if she saw me sleepwalking.

We sat on the couch, buried under blankets, eating popcorn and started the video. Ella and I laughed at how immature and naïve we had been. It brought back good memories. Ella was about to turn the video off after watching us both drift off into sleep. “Wait! Don’t turn it off yet, you’re moving.” I blurted out. We watched to see what she would do. Panic gripped me. Something horrible was about to happen, I just knew it.

On screen, Ella sat up and stared into the camera. Her eyes were completely white. At that point, I sat up, too. “Ella are you okay?” I asked her in a sleepy voice. Ella continued to stare unblinkingly into the camera, then she blinked. Her eyes turned completely black, she turned her head and stared at me, her eyes eating my soul. Then I heard a noise, like a slow tearing of fabric. Ella fell backwards onto her bed in a pool of warm blood. I watched as her swollen body was torn open from the inside. I was about to scream, when a hand covered in dark hair clawed its way out of Ella’s chest using naught be its long dagger-like fingernails. The hand, dripping in the blood of my friend covered my mouth, stifling my scream. The rest of the beast crawled out of the hole it had ripped open in its host. How this large creature had fit in such a small body bewildered me. It was nearly eight feet tall, with muscular arms that dragged on the ground. It was covered in coarse hair, except for its long tail which was made entirely of rough scales. When it saw me, a smile crept across its face, literally from ear to ear, revealing deadly teeth that cut its own gums and lips. The creature licked its lips with its forked tongue, savoring the taste of its own blood.

I turned to run, but the creature’s tail caught me and coiled around my body, like a boa constrictor squeezing the life out of its pray. It hoisted me up above its head and let out a deep, rumbling throaty laugh that echoed and reverberated across the room. I looked down at my friend, she was just a pile of skin, most of her internal organs were strewn across the bed, though many seemed to be missing, where they went, I had not a clue. “Look at me!” the creature ordered. I gazed down at the blood soaked beast. “You will do.” It chuckled. Lifting up a hand, he sliced my skin with his razor sharp fingernails. The cut spanned from the bottom of my neck to my belly button. Wedging its fingernails in the cut, the creature slowly peeled the wound open, first the left side, then the right, ripping the skin and meat off of my bones. The same tearing noise filled my ears. There was nothing I could do—I was at the mercy of this beast. I looked down, I could see my ribcage and my internal organs which were spilling out of my body. Chuckling, the creature bit off one of its own fingers and used it to scratch my heart. Leaving the finger nestled in my ribcage, he picked up some of my intestines that had fallen to the ground and placed them back in my body and folded my skin back into place. By simply looking at me, no one would know what horrors had transpired, the cut mark had disappeared. However, I could feel the finger near my heart and it was growing. Soon, it had used many of my organs as fuel for its own growth. It inhabited my body now, not me. I felt the scar on my heart, the poison seeping through my blood. I was not me anymore.

The creature set me down, “You will not remember this in the morning.” It promised, while lapping up all the spilled blood. It proceeded to pick up Ella’s skin and crawl inside. Looking around, no one would be able to tell what tragedy had taken place that night. There was not even a mark on either Ella’s or my body. I drifted off to sleep. The video ended.

Ella and I looked at each other, terrified.

Then we heard it: that slow, ripping noise.

Credit To – LaurenF

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Rate This Pasta
Rating: 7.6/10 (450 votes cast)
The Sleepover, 7.6 out of 10 based on 450 ratings
  • https://twitter.com/Star_Kindler Star Kindler

    Too much gory and not enough scary for me. The gore is very lovingly described though, sickeningly so. But in a good way. I did like the description of the beasts, what with their paradoxical size and the fact that their teeth cut their own lips and gums. Nice little touch.

    I feel this could be very scary if there was more build-up to it. Several parts of the story feel like they are just tossed off. Chloe’s sleepwalking comes out of nowhere and then ends up playing no real importance. We don’t even get to see her sleepwalking, we are only told she does it. Show us Chloe sleepwalking and doing odd things. Then her panic about not wanting to watch the vlog feels less like an excuse to set-up for the reveal and more a part of her character.

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    Rating: +22 (from 22 votes)
    • Ty

      That was a little scary for me, but it was probably fake. I say this: 45% I believe it was real, 55% I believe it was fake

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      Rating: -23 (from 23 votes)
      • ILikePeas

        99.8% of Creepypasta isn’t real mate.

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        Rating: +35 (from 35 votes)
      • Griffen

        Why the fuck would you begin to have a doubt of this being fake?

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        Rating: +1 (from 3 votes)
      • Seth

        I can understand where star is coming from. With the monster though what was your basis idea for it?

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        Rating: +1 (from 1 vote)
  • THEN WHO WAS…….nevermind…

    No.

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    Rating: +11 (from 21 votes)
  • Theory.

    Brilliant. Absolutely incredible.
    At first, when it came to the part where they were about to view the video, I came to an assumption that it wouldn’t be scary at all. But boy was I wrong. I love this idea, and the way it was written out, what with adding a bit of ingredients; school, cliques, the whole thing. Made it seem like it wouldn’t be that extreme right?
    But this pasta exceeded my expectations.
    I give it a 10/10 :), higher if I could.

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    Rating: -1 (from 27 votes)
  • Harry Sachs

    You started with a really great concept, but by the middleish of the story I felt like slapping you for ruining it

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    Rating: +24 (from 28 votes)
  • OBA

    What…?

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    Rating: +7 (from 11 votes)
  • Rage_Quitter

    This got better as it progressed, but I felt like ir started not only from the viewpoint of a child but also as if it was written for one.
    Other than the simple, slightly awkward first few paragraphs though, it got going well, the monsters description was good, and the ending at least came close to being creepy.

    5/10

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    Rating: -4 (from 10 votes)
  • Levi

    Now THAT is a read! A fresh idea with a very unexpected ending. Though the projection could have been better.
    Still, thank you for this!

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    Rating: -2 (from 16 votes)
  • Eve

    Nice

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    Rating: -7 (from 13 votes)
  • Opaleone

    What the piss?

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    Rating: +7 (from 13 votes)
  • thischickeniscold

    I have to agree with the previous comments. This felt rushed and somewhat anti climactic. Some details about the narrator and her friend are irrelevent. However, the concept is original and the monster was scary. 7/10

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    Rating: +3 (from 7 votes)
  • Inside me i feel something is unsetteling,some part of my minds tell to do wrong thing like killin everyone around u,killing urself & sometimes i even feel like i am gonna loose my mind which i fear the most

    i think i hav already listened this plot of story cause i am having some sort of de ja vu while reading it

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    Rating: +2 (from 4 votes)
  • Night

    I feel like you were building it up good[I say good because it could have been better] but then you ruined it with some monster coming out.5/10 is the highest I’d give it.

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    Rating: +3 (from 3 votes)
  • Alex

    I really like the idea of this, though I think the execution was a little rushed and too gory for it to be creepy. Plus I think the beginning was rather rushed and well I was expecting Chloe’s sleep-walking to actually have a part to play within this because really it was just a piece of random information that had no point to the story, maybe you were using it to confuse the reader into thinking that Chloe was going to do something instead of Ella but to be honest when reading I didn’t get that message. I think if you had more build up and a slightly slower progression it would have been very good. I also think it slightly strange about the last sentence of WHY it is making it’s appearance now, is it because they know about this monster?
    All in all – very good concept, needs a bit of tweaking to make it creepier instead of just gory because some of it I find was rather unnecessary for it’s concept. Still, quite enjoyable.
    7/10

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    Rating: +4 (from 4 votes)
  • the guy who coments alot

    It was great – I was on the edge of my seat through all of it – but I didn’t understand something ,

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    Rating: 0 (from 2 votes)
  • That one guy

    Danm tat was good

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    Rating: -1 (from 5 votes)
  • J

    You described watch the vlog like what was happening was present tense, like the monster was suddenly there ripping chloe and her buddy apart right then. It was very confusing. You should decribe it like someone describing watching a movie, not this ” and I was terrified and tried to run away from the creature, but it caught me…” stuff and more along the lines of “you could see the terror on my face as I tried and failed to escape the thing…” I think if you would just fix that part, less this is happening now or ‘im having a flash back’ and more detachted ‘I know this tape is real, but there’s no way it can be’ and your story would come out much better and flow smoother.

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    Rating: +4 (from 4 votes)
  • Victim

    I love the story! Its absolutely love it! The ending was a bit predictable. But, Other than that, it was a great story! :)

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    Rating: +2 (from 2 votes)
  • Mark Moreno

    I was eating mc Donald’s while reading this the gore made me choke

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    Rating: +1 (from 7 votes)
    • ILikePeas

      Something’s not right here. The McDonald’s alone should have been sufficient.

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      Rating: +7 (from 7 votes)
  • La Mettrie

    You did a good job in setting up the tape, I was really burning to know what was on it. I feel like after the monster things got a bit sloppy (and I don’t just mean the guts on the floor). It felt rushed in comparison to the measured pace of the early paragraphs.
    As the author had her memory erased the contents of the video should be as new to her as they are to us. But it seemed like the “I” in the video was getting confused with the “I” watching it (or else why is she describing the feeling of the finger eating her organs, etc?)
    It’s not a bad story, there’s just some things that left me dissatisfied.

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    Rating: +2 (from 2 votes)
  • Dun-dun-dun

    That was completely unpredictable!!! I shall come back for seconds and even thirds of this pasta! Yum!

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    Rating: -1 (from 5 votes)
  • ALB

    What is–? I don’t even–? I…okay, let’s start from the beginning:

    “I was always known as the weird girl; the one with no friends, strict parents, and strange habits.”

    Why?

    I don’t mean, why is that so, I mean, why is this part of the story? What difference does it make? Could you not just as easily have told this exact same story about a relatively popular kid in school? We spend a lot of time on the character’s unpopularity and the novelty of a friend and the first-even sleepover, etc, but it’s all really for nothing?

    Note that if it were the narrator and not the best friend who was host to demons (or whatever…) that the story would make a lot more sense: the fact that the narrator had never been on a sleepover would suddenly be very important, because it would account for why her other friends haven’t all been torn about by night-demons (and would also possibly account for her sleepwalking, which as it stands is just a device to delay the story’s resolution for a bit).

    “‘No, actually, let’s not watch it now. Let’s wait until high school graduation to watch it. It will remind us of what we were like when we were this age.’ Ella reluctantly agreed.”

    Why?

    The source of the tension in this story is that the reader realizes pretty quickly that the tape will show the character’s something frightening happening in the middle of the night. But that something will be equally as frightening whether the girls watch the tape the next day or six years from now. Except that watching it the next day would make a lot more sense. Considering that the story is relatively brief, you could have had them watch it the next day but written the exact same number of words describing the buildup, thus drawing the tension out for the same amount of time but having a plot that makes a bit more sense. This would also rid you of the need for the sleepwalking subplot, which takes up a lot of space while contributing nothing except this needless delay.

    “It was four years later and so much had changed. I was no longer the outcast, Ella and I had acquired a large group of friends that seemed to be ever expanding. Sleepovers were now a regular occurrence,”

    Why?

    This adds nothing at all to the story. The resolution could be exactly the same without it. And there doesn’t seem to be any reason behind it at all?

    “The hand, dripping in the blood of my friend covered my mouth, stifling my scream. The rest of the beast crawled out of the hole it had ripped open in its host. How this large creature had fit in such a small body bewildered me.”

    Why?

    …seriously, just, why?

    “Soon, it had used many of my organs as fuel for its own growth. It inhabited my body now, not me. I felt the scar on my heart, the poison seeping through my blood. I was not me anymore.”

    Why?

    Why does this happen right away? And why does the character realize that it’s happening when she watches the video (it seems a hard thing to grasp visually) despite not remembering it? As written it implies that the transformation/possession/whatever takes place almost instantly but then the creatures lies dormant for many years…for some reason. If the process took a long time, that would account for why the story must sprawl across many years. But it doesn’t.

    “Ella and I looked at each other, terrified.

    Then we heard it: that slow, ripping noise.”

    Ex. I mean, why?

    Do you suddenly turn into a monster only once you know that you’re a monster? Oh, and also when you’re asleep, apparently? What triggers this? And to what end? I mean, as baffling as the appearance of the monster is in the video, at least it has an apparent reason for coming out. So what’s on the agenda now? Are the monsters just going to sit around going, “Boy, we sure put one over on those girls, am I right? Man, the look on their faces when we popped out! Anyway, wanna go get a beer?”

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    Rating: +9 (from 11 votes)
  • http://crappypasta.com the cake

    Wonderful start.
    Terrible Ending.
    Not creepy, just gorey. which gore is okay. for goreypasta.com. if that’s a real web site.

    not creppy or scary at all. the fact that she was a sleep walker who lied to her best friend about sleep walking for their entire friendship was creepier to me than the gut ripping monster baby.

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    Rating: +4 (from 6 votes)
  • Matteo

    I hated it. More gore than creepy

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    Rating: +5 (from 5 votes)
  • Nozomi

    I

    LOVED

    IT

    !!!!!

    Take a bow, you have serious talent :)

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    Rating: -5 (from 11 votes)
  • http://thed0ct0risin.wordpress.com Dr. Malpractice

    There was something about the underlying concept that just didn’t click. The idea of something “wearing” someone else and hiding itself for your entire life is unnerving, and so is the idea of infestation, but this seems to try to mix the two with unnecessarily complicated results.

    If it had turned out that the main character’s friend had woken up in the middle of the night, unknown to her, and intentionally shown her “true self” to the camera (planning the sleep over at the end of high school to reveal her identity as a skin-wearing demon from the depths of Hell), then that would have been frightening. If it had turned out that something like the facehugger from Aliens attacked them, that would have been almost as disturbing. As it is, the author seems to be going for both ideas, and fails to get the creepiness inherent in either.

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    Rating: +4 (from 4 votes)

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