The Homeless Man
Somewhere in New York City there is an old homeless man missing both his legs from the knees down, whose spot along the streets is the corner of Lexington and East 21st, near Granmercy Park. Approach him after nightfall, give him some change (NO pennies, NO dimes) and ask him, “What did you see on the other side?” He will then tell you all about his travels to other realms and times, where he lost his legs, how he lost his money.
It is up to you whether to believe him or not, but as you listen you’ll find yourself being drawn in with every story. You must stay alert, or the old man will notice your inattentiveness, and with a scowl he will stop imparting his wisdom; he will chase you as fast as he can, tottering on his stubs. The other reason why you must stay alert is to check the time. Before midnight you must interrupt him (do NOT let him finish whatever story he’s telling you at the moment) and say “I’ve heard enough, old man. Good day and good luck”, then walk away.
Make at least two left-hand turns around the block before going about your business. You must do this, because anyone who has stayed to listen past midnight is never seen again, at least not in this particular plane of existence.
Posted in Beings & Entities, Rites & Rituals
September 10th, 2008 at 6:40 am
There’s just something about being chased by a homeless man on stumps that makes me giggle.
September 10th, 2008 at 10:56 am
A hobo with out legs who will chase you…I would like to see that
September 10th, 2008 at 1:40 pm
oh noez, the old man is going to waddle on me ahhh.
September 10th, 2008 at 6:08 pm
good luck and good day to u sir it is almost midnight and i must leave be for u start to chase me:)
September 11th, 2008 at 2:04 am
Uh-oh! Look at me run up these stairs old man! Game. Set. Match!
September 11th, 2008 at 10:32 am
BUT WHO WAS STUMPS?
September 12th, 2008 at 6:55 pm
I didn’t know Edward R. Murrow was still alive.
September 12th, 2008 at 10:56 pm
lol at every comment above me! =D
but seriously is him chasing me on his stumps the only consequence?…pfffft!
September 13th, 2008 at 5:08 pm
I gotta agree with everyone else; the thought of a legless old man chasing me around New York City on his stumps ruined the “scary” for me.
Interesting story, though.
And I lol’d at The Joker’s comment.
September 19th, 2008 at 1:10 am
I, however, understand the human fear of being in the presence of a malformed.
While he chased you, you would feel the horror of wondering how many people he had to chase to get that fast, and how many he caught.
September 19th, 2008 at 1:47 pm
…….BACON ICE CREAM !!!
September 24th, 2008 at 7:06 pm
WHO WAS LEGZ?!
September 24th, 2008 at 10:10 pm
Lame.
September 28th, 2008 at 2:25 am
“You must do this, because anyone who has stayed to listen past midnight is never seen again, at least not in this particular plane of existence.”
October 11th, 2008 at 4:44 pm
Lt. Dan?
October 11th, 2008 at 8:32 pm
@asdf — LMFAO
October 12th, 2008 at 8:15 pm
Holy niggers….
I could waddle on my dick!
rawr.
lololol
Lt.Dan
ogksdogs
Black People.
October 20th, 2008 at 6:34 am
Awesome I got chills, some homeless people you talk to really have had interesting lives.
November 4th, 2008 at 11:46 am
I really should try this….
But how do we know which legless, homeless man is the right one?