The Homeless Man
Somewhere in New York City there is an old homeless man missing both his legs from the knees down, whose spot along the streets is the corner of Lexington and East 21st, near Granmercy Park. Approach him after nightfall, give him some change (NO pennies, NO dimes) and ask him, “What did you see on the other side?” He will then tell you all about his travels to other realms and times, where he lost his legs, how he lost his money.
It is up to you whether to believe him or not, but as you listen you’ll find yourself being drawn in with every story. You must stay alert, or the old man will notice your inattentiveness, and with a scowl he will stop imparting his wisdom; he will chase you as fast as he can, tottering on his stubs. The other reason why you must stay alert is to check the time. Before midnight you must interrupt him (do NOT let him finish whatever story he’s telling you at the moment) and say “I’ve heard enough, old man. Good day and good luck”, then walk away.
Make at least two left-hand turns around the block before going about your business. You must do this, because anyone who has stayed to listen past midnight is never seen again, at least not in this particular plane of existence.
The Homeless Man,
There’s just something about being chased by a homeless man on stumps that makes me giggle.
Same i was taking the story very seriously then that part came up and all i could imagine was eddy murphy from trading places and i couldent stop laughing
Hahahaha ohmygosh.
A hobo with out legs who will chase you…I would like to see that
oh noez, the old man is going to waddle on me ahhh.
good luck and good day to u sir it is almost midnight and i must leave be for u start to chase me:)
Uh-oh! Look at me run up these stairs old man! Game. Set. Match!
BUT WHO WAS STUMPS?
I didn’t know Edward R. Murrow was still alive.
lol at every comment above me! =D
but seriously is him chasing me on his stumps the only consequence?…pfffft!
I gotta agree with everyone else; the thought of a legless old man chasing me around New York City on his stumps ruined the “scary” for me.
Interesting story, though.
And I lol’d at The Joker’s comment.
I, however, understand the human fear of being in the presence of a malformed.
While he chased you, you would feel the horror of wondering how many people he had to chase to get that fast, and how many he caught.
…….BACON ICE CREAM !!!
WHO WAS LEGZ?!
Lame.
“You must do this, because anyone who has stayed to listen past midnight is never seen again, at least not in this particular plane of existence.”
Lt. Dan?
@asdf — LMFAO
Awesome I got chills, some homeless people you talk to really have had interesting lives.
I really should try this….
But how do we know which legless, homeless man is the right one?
How many legless homeless men are there?
D:
. . . and when he catches you?
wait, so let me get this right…i’ve not only go to get from tennessee, to new york, but find Lt. Dan and GIVE HIM FREE MONEY, only to hear some lies, and end up being chased around for four hours? sound’s like an excellent first night in New York. maybe i can get robbed and shot as well. who want’s to come with??
Seriously I’m in TN on business looking for Jeff!
what exactly is the point of doing this aside from the chance to hear ramblings from an old man?
That would be super awkward if your path was as follows:
_________
l l
l l
y x
x being the place where you hear the story and y being where you end up after the two left hand turns because he would totally see you down the block and you would see him and he would wonder why you cut him off…
There were more spaces in that post when it was being made than when it was posted. Sorry it looks so non-sequitor now…
Lmao @Alex’s idea. I liked the story, I don’t think some people get that the scary thing is getting sent to another dimension rather than getting chased by a legless hobo.