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Shadows



Estimated reading time — 8 minutes

I walk out toward my car, in my white jumpsuit, a white shirt underneath it. It was just another night. I’m 30 years-old, 6-foot-tall, and all of my short, brown hair, and work the night shift at a shipping company. It’s hard, tedious work, but I need the money. I step outside, my porch light gleams from the yellow-painted wooden paneling above my porch. Wood also protrudes about 3 feet from the right side of my door, painted yellow, a red-painted doorbell button is attached to the right wall. along a wall another door length to the left of the door, a wall with 8, even, red boxes attached to it. At the corner, there is another wooden wall, parallel to the one with the doorbell, the same length, sticks out as well. The porch was cement, painted green. Bare, stony flower beds to the left and right of the corner of the wooden walls, which were about the same length from the corner. Beams stand on either side of the edge of the porch, past which are four feet of trees and plants before reaching my yard. My house was surrounded by plants. They weren’t styled, but I thought it made the house stand out, with plants all around it.

I make my way down the walkway to my car, the path winding slightly along the way, two big trees on either side of me, in the middle of each side of the lawn, three more trees on the right, two grown from about the same spot, in a “Y” shape, like Siamese twins. I make my way to my truck. My truck is a grey, 4X4, 2000 model Dodge tuck. It has two-doors, but it has a back seat that you can get to by putting the seats forward. It was heavy-duty, and I used it if I even had to do any heavy moving for any of my friends who wanted to take advantage of having a friend who lifts stuff for a living. I walk onto the sidewalk, step into the street, and walk around to the driver-side door. I open the door, step in, put my keys in the ignition, and start it up. It starts up easily, not making much noise, but I never liked to show off, anyways. I carefully hit the gas, weave into the right side of the road, and drive off. The night seems darker than usual, I notice, driving down the street. I live in a decently sized town, and it is usually lit up somewhat, but I can’t see much more light than the two street lights I pass as I hit the end of the street, and take a left down a 4-lane road. There is an entrance to a small forest, then some apartments to my right, at the corner ahead, a pre-school, houses on the left.

I continue driving, feeling more and more uneasy. I was never afraid of the dark, but something about tonight made me worried. I stop at the stop sign down the street and notice another thing. I haven’t seen or passed any other cars. I start to get a little more creeped out. Where was everybody? This wasn’t a small town at all! Where could everybody be? I go across the street, and continue down. This street has a church at the corner on the left, then houses on both sides all down to the end of the street. The street lights keeping things lit up enough as I go. I have my headlights on, just in case, though. I continue down the street, approaching the first stop light. I still have not seen any cars.

Suddenly, the light changes green, then starts randomly changing colors. Rapidly changing between red, amber, and green, even starting to have more than one on the light at a time. The lights almost seem to be hypnotic, I stare at them, something about them is so intense, I can’t take my eyes away. Sparks fly from them, all the street lights behind me, and on the 6-lane road intersecting this one start getting extremely bright, flashing as well. Even my headlights, light on top of the inside of the cab of my truck, the dashboard-light, with the fuel gauge and speedometer, and radio lights start getting intensely bright. I hear a ringing in my ears, getting more and more ear-piercing. My heart races, I start to panic. What the hell is going on here?! I still cannot stop focusing on the lights ahead. My eyesight almost seems to home in on them, zooming in on them, more so with the truck still moving. The ringing gets louder and louder. More sparks continue to fly from the lights ahead.

As I hit the small dip at the end of the street, every light on the traffic-light is on, and gets extremely bright, as well as every other light nearby, as well as my headlights and lights inside the truck. The ringing gets extremely intense in my ears, and, suddenly, the traffic-lights explode, a surge of sparks flying from them, as well as all the streetlights. My truck dies, and drifts down the hill, moving forward a bit, then stops. I cannot see anything around me, it is pitch black.

Panic grips me, I desperately try turning the key in the ignition. The engine revs, but doesn’t start. I keep trying and trying, my heart feeling as if it’s about to explode. Finally, the truck starts, the headlights turn on, the switch still being flipped on, and it reveals what is before me.

A dark, blank, lifeless road.

What used to be a striped, normal, town road, has turned into a blank, dark-gray, smooth road leading into what seems to be an infinite abyss of darkness. on either sides of the road, there is nothing but dull, brown dirt. It’s as if I have been dumped off in a wasteland, but it happened in a flash.

I am on the right side of the road. I glance at the electric clock on my radio. The pale-blue numbers read “88:88”. Where the fuck am I?! I think to my self, on the verge of a heart-attack. I switch the clock to the radio station numbers, and look through the stations, trying to see if there is anything to calm my nerves, something to put my mind at piece. Hell, all I need to hear is another human’s voice, and I’d be happy! All that greets me is static. I turn of the radio, and slam my hands against the steering wheel, accidentally hitting the horn, sending an ear-piercing honk out of the front of my truck, startling me greatly. The sound echos lightly, as if there is nothing there. I wait for a moment, trying to calm down and think clearly.

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I hear something.

It sounds like light footsteps on soil. Not heavy enough to be a grown adult, but not really a kids, either. If not for the silence, I would not be able to hear it. It startles me as well. It is quick, and far off at first, but then stops, and is slow, as if stalking something. I do not see anything, or anyone around on the side with all of the dirt. Is it hiding? Am I going crazy? Is it even there?

It gets closer and closer, but I still cannot see what it is. The footsteps get louder and louder. Closer and closer. My heart-rate picks up, beating heavier and heavier in my chest. Suddenly, when the footsteps seem to be in reaching distance, I hear nothing. Silence fills the air once more. I listen carefully, but do not hear anything. Maybe it was just my imagination. I think to myself. Then, I suddenly hear another noise. It’s like the tightening of springs, small springs. It squeaks as it moves, slowly and carefully. What is that? I look around, wondering what it is, nothing outside, nothing inside that could be making that sound. Then, I hear the spring get it’s tightest, then a light then, as if something had hit it’s end point. My eyes shoot open as I realize what it is.

The passenger door handle.

My head whips over to my right as I feel something tug at the door, the truck moving with the tug, but the door stays shut. The button on the opening side of the door remains down. Whatever it is cannot get in.

I start hearing strained wheezing, heavy, as if aggravated, disappointed, confused. I can hear the spring of the handle get pulled tightly, the door handle make the thud noise, and the tug on the truck again and again. Whatever is outside wants in. Badly. I keeps pulling harder and harder, the wheezes get stronger, I start hearing shrieks, like an angry bird fighting a predator. The truck tips more and more, the sounds get louder, the handle gets pulled rapidly. Then, it keeps the handle pulled for a second, and releases.

I hear complete silence for a few minutes. I stare at the door, my eyes wide-open, looking for any signs of movement, anything at all to identify what that thing could have been. There is no movement, no sign of life at all. I hold my breathe while watching the door, listening carefully. Finally, I release the breath, and sink back in my seat. I shut my eyes, and ponder what is happening.

The thought strikes me that I better make sure that my door is locked as well. My eyes shoot open, I quickly sit-up, look over at my lock, and see that the golf-tee-like button is pressed down. My heart skips a beat when I notice the shadow looming over the lock, staring right through my window at me, my face not but inches away, only thin glass between us.

The creature resembled a vulture without a beak. Intense, yellow eyes stared back at me. They almost seem to glow in the darkness around us. It’s skin was a pale-grayish blue. It’s mouth looked almost cracked, going back half a foot back from it’s mouth, slightly upward, almost as if it were smiling. It had no nose, it’s head was humanoid shaped, but I had never seen suck features on a human face. It’s torso was covered in feathers, a burst of feathers along it’s shoulders. When I looked up at it, it screeched again, louder than it had last time. It raised it’s arms, which were like bird lets, but muscular like a human’s, three claws on the upper part of it’s hand, one on the lower part, feathers cut off at it’s shoulders.

The creature started to hit the window. It was trying to get me! The window started to crack. I panicked, and stomped on the gas. The truck lurched forward, leaving the bird-like creature behind me. I hadn’t seen any wings, so, maybe it couldn’t follow me.

I tore down the road as fast as I could. The road didn’t curve, or end, it just kept going with the same pitch black surrounding me, my headlights only clearing up so much. What was that thing? WHERE THE FUCK AM I?!

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I kept looking for signs of life, anything to show I wasn’t alone, but found nothing. There is nothing here but darkness, and whatever the hell that thing was back there.

As I continue vainly thinking of a plan, and searching for any signs of life, I see something in the corner of my eye. It’s the radio. It has turned on, and is on the radio stations, the numbers rapidly looping, changing between random numbers, not stopping. I hit the power button, but that does nothing. It keeps doing that, and the volume slowly turns up, the knob turning with it. I attempt to hold the knob, but it just keeps turning ever so slowly. I hear a song start to play. The song is “Turn Around And Look At Me” by “The Vogues”. As the volume creeps up, I can make out the voices better. At first, they are muffled in static, but the static dissipates, and I start to hear them clearly. I start to panic.

“Why me!? WHY ME!? Why did this happen to me!? I’m just a regular guy!” I frantically say to myself.

“There is someone…”

The music starts, softly, quietly. The lyrics are eerie, and make my heart start to race even more.

“Walking behind you…”

What? Oh, god! I think, I continue thinking to myself. I glance behind me, paranoid, but see nothing.

“Turn around…. Look at me…” The volume continues going higher, the song also gets more intense itself. I check behind me once more, to be sure.

“There is someone… Watching your footsteps…” The song starts getting loud, and more intense. The headlights on the truck and dashboard lights start to flicker.

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“What?! No, no, no, no!” I say to myself, realizing what is happening.

“TURN AROUND… LOOK AT ME…” The song gets louder faster and much more intense.

“Please, no!” I plead.

“THERE IS SOMEONE… WHO REALLY NEEDS YOU…” The lights flicker violently, electricity can be heard fizzing.

“HERE’S MY HEART… IN MY HAND…” The lights cut off, in the upper right corner in my eye, in the rear-view mirror, I see two yellow eyeballs staring back at me.

“AAAH-” I start to yell, but am cut off my talons being wrapped around my mouth.

“TURN AROUND… LOOK AT ME…” The song continues, in darkness, except for the light of the radio, the numbers still rapidly changing. Amongst the muffled screams and struggling, a crimson liquid splatters against the lit, pale-blue numbers.

The song cuts off, and is replaced by static, which drifts off to silence, then, the light cuts off.

Credit To: Dillon Lester

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Copyright Statement: Unless explicitly stated, all stories published on Creepypasta.com are the property of (and under copyright to) their respective authors, and may not be narrated or performed under any circumstance.

31 thoughts on “Shadows”

  1. First two paragraphs were awful. The guys house has nothing to do with the story. I dont care what it looks like. And the truck. For the rest of the story, which wasn’t that bad except that nothing in particular really happened, all I need to know is that its a truck

  2. Sweet. Jesus. The description of the creature is pure nightmare fuel, at least for me.
    I agree with past commenters that the beginning is a bit over detailed, but overall fairly well written and, in my opinion, wonderfully creepy.
    Gah, I’m going to see that thing in my dreams now, the description of its appearance was perfect to create a crystal clear picture in my mind. Well done.

  3. The only comment I have is that you kept switching tenses throughout the story. That’s not good. If you want to tell a story in present tense, stick to present tense. Don’t suddenly change to past tense and then to present tense again, it’s confusing, and not the good sort of confusing.

  4. I am relatively new to the CreepyPasta scene so forgive me if I step on any toes.
    Alot of the “Constructive Criticism” offered by some is plain mean and nasty. There have been alot of stories that I didn’t like but one man’s trash is another’s treasure. So while hints and tips are good, outright degradation should probably be kept to oneself.

  5. So, not gonna lie, despite how long your story took to get to it’s point, I found it interesting…..

    …..in the fact that you chose Hypno as the basis for your monster.

    Originality goes a long way, people.

  6. That was really bad.

    Now I know what it’s like to have ADD.

    “And there were 14 trees on the left side and 7 trees on the right and the streets had pavement on them and there were stripes on the street and my house is made out of wood and part of it sticks out and there are metal boxes there and I think those are pretty cool and OH YEAH I WAS WRITING A STORY.”

  7. I really wanted to read this, but I didn’t couldn’t make it past “and all of my short, brown hair, and work the night shift…” I’m not sure if it’s late and my reading skills are currently poor, or if that’s just a typo. But mostly I’m distracted by all the comas. Semicolons are punctuation too.
    For example: Wood also protrudes about 3 feet from the right side of my door, painted yellow; a red-painted doorbell button is attached to the right wall.
    It just helps in making reading a little easier.
    Also, some sentences (pertaining only to the first paragraph) could’ve been combined which would’ve made reading much easier.

    I wanted to point out a few other things too, but it seems the more I reread your first paragraph, the more I have to say about it. But basically, you’re using comas where you should instead use a semicolon or just start a new sentence all together, as well as failing to use comas where they are needed.

    Maybe you do this, so it might be pointless to add, but when I write, I read it back out loud. Always make sure that when you say it out loud it feels natural. If I ever find myself stumbling over something I’ve written, I rewrite the passage so that it becomes more realistic sounding, as if I’m literally telling the story to someone, versus just being words nicely strung together.

  8. Ya know… Nighttouch made a good point! I missed that bit of info. :/ Also, I appreciate the constructive criticism, except the ones who were dicks about it. :/ I mean, calm down.

    P.S. The dude’s comment above mine I found hilarious!

  9. The Vogues? Thats the heart stopping song you chose?!? I was starting to actually get invested in ur man earing vulture thing when u summon the image of my grandparents dancing…

  10. It was a great story, but I felt like it has too much unneeded detail. It’s possible to know TOO much of the person, including the specific type of car, and how tall he is, or his age, since it doesn’t have to do anything with the story. It was slow at first, and it was worded differently. Like, the way he thought to himself wasn’t real. The ending was expected, you should have put som plot twists before he was killed, but in all, great story~
    I was starting to tense up when the vulture-like creature was at the door

  11. Hope you write another one mate. Yea the discribing things been said so i wont add but its better than no details.
    e.g.
    A CREEPY MAN DID A CREEPY THING… IT WAS CREEPY.

    look foward to your next one mate.
    Nice one.

  12. Like everyone else said, there was waaay too much description of the exact specs of the car and fences and etc. I literally almost fell asleep during the first couple paragraphs.

  13. Great story. Although can I make a suggestion? Don’t use so much description in the beginning. It’s not really relevant to the story (meaning the story isn’t made better by including it and it wouldn’t make a difference in the story if you didn’t). It’s just distracting. Also maybe change the point of view from 1st person to 2nd or 3rd, and make it “personal” to the reader.

    Again though great story!

  14. Jack M. Crazymitch

    Definitely a well-written and captivating piece, my only bit of constructive criticism being; its sometimes too detailed, to the point where its unnesessary.

  15. Like the man’s job, I found this tedious. I did get a little creeped out at the part where he is struggling with the doorhandle. But why was vulture man doing that, if he can just appear in the cab? Mostly I had to fight to keep reading past the beginning, because even with the shopping list detail, there was no point.

  16. Not well written. Too much time was spent describing a house that didn’t feature in the sotry past its description.

    When the narrator was stuck in the truck with the “alien” trying to get in, the truck had stalled out and would not start. How then, did he/she punch the gas and speed away?

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