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Mr. Welldone



Estimated reading time — 2 minutes

Hello.

I am Mr. Welldone.

I watched the copulation which conceived you and I screamed in horror. I saw you birthed like a hatched parasite, hairless and gagging, and I grit my teeth in hatred, sliding them over each other again and again and again and again and again until they were flat and smooth. I will watch you wither and grow old, as your body congeals and the weight of your years pulls your flesh from your body and I will grin and snicker, laugh and laugh. I will see your desiccated corpse pumped full of superficial chemicals, interred into the dirt to feed the eyeless, subterranean creatures of the earth and I will howl because I know where you are going.

I know where you are going.

I know the secrets of this earth, as I knew the secrets of the one before it. I will bring about the End, and you cannot stop me.

You read these tales and you do not know that with each you read, with each you create and recreate, with each you retell, with each you claim ownership of, you beckon the End.

For there will be some among you who will try to verify these tales. You will seek them out. Those that do so with passion will find that many of them are falsehoods… but some will be harrowing at the very least. Others will leave you scarred for the rest of your fleeting days. Others still will leave you stripped of your flesh.

And that flesh will be used to build more, and more, and more tales. Twisted and stretched to cry out to more curious individuals.

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And I will smile, my teeth clenching together tightly, tightly, tightly until one cracks with a satisfying pop. My eyes unblinking; watching everything fall into place; wide and empty; weeping and shriveling with delicious, protracted agony.

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I am so excited. So very excited.

Even as you read this, some among you are emboldened. The sick part of you which lusts for the End whispers into your mind, making you want to see the horror, the pain, the blood, the death. You want to see it. You want to see what lies hidden in the Dark, beyond sight, smell, taste, hearing, and touch.

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Come.

Come and see.

I will show you such wonderful things.

Please wait...

Copyright Statement: Unless explicitly stated, all stories published on Creepypasta.com are the property of (and under copyright to) their respective authors, and may not be narrated or performed under any circumstance.

216 thoughts on “Mr. Welldone”

  1. You read these tales and you do not know that with each you read, with each you create and recreate, with each you retell, with each you claim ownership of, you beckon the End.

    Okay…this kinda describes my view on other dimensions, disregarding the fact of this ‘End’ he speaks of…

    I rate this 6/10!

    Sincerely,
    Grim Gamer

  2. little miss black cat

    Maybe Mr.Welldone is the dark part of our souls the one that causes insanity the one that spews out hatred,jelousy, kiler ( not the good kind.) And makes us into killers, and psychopaths.

  3. Hey everyone,
    I realise in three years late to the party, and probably no one will ever read this, but please continue if you are.

    Now, imagine for me, its late at night, your in your bedroom reading creepypastas, laughing at the imposters of Mr. Welldone, then you need a pee, no, you do now, and you open your door to find the rapture has begun, and Mr. Welldone is standing in front of you. Enjoy that thought, every night if possible.

    Also, personally I think Mr. Welldone is really cool, one hell of a big burly motherfucker who could crush you under his toe, probably very famous in reality … And also Mexican.

    Bye, bye.

  4. Lol I thought that person was going to advertise Old Spice with all the “look here and look back there, now back to you” haha

  5. @:D……….Mr. stands for “mister”. It is the English title for a civilian (non-military) adult man, married or unmarried. Everyone over the age of four knows this. Now get of the damn internet and go back to preschool. Thanks.

  6. Also, to any Mr. Welldone “impersonaters”, check your profile pictures. Now check Mr. Welldone’s profile picture. Now check yours again. Problem? And you wonder how we know you aren’t really Mr. Welldone.

  7. Hello.
    Personally, I quite enjoy the comments of the real Mr. Welldone. Were there not someone out there already doing it, I’d probably leave those kind of comments myself. I am, however, not such an ass as to impersonate or copy Mr. Welldone. Being of high intellect and a bit cynical myself, I can confirm that Mr. Welldone does, in fact, use each and every “big word” correctly. I urge you to look them up.
    Go.
    Go expand your vocabulary.

  8. I like the idea of us bringing upon us our own downfall all because we want to scare ourselves

    Now excuse me, but I need to try to summon Bloody Mary while pissing off Slenderman and The Rake, calling Satan, and saying the name of the Jack who likes Candles, then record the result for YouTube

  9. Hello
    im glad to inform everyone that those who said they were mewill die in the most painful way. Yet i have sad news, because the world is so full of disgust and hate, all of you must die in fire.
    goodluck
    goodbye

  10. I was so relieved when Mr. Welldone posted an actual comment, I have so much respect for him. If there is anything paranormal in this planet whatsoever, it is Mr. Welldone. He speaks as though from times long forgotten, which is not as easy as it sounds. You readers come here to revel in the strange, the unexplained. And yet you scoff when a potential deity shows up and verbally kicks your arse. Thankyou for all your brilliant, insightful, and sometimes plain spooky comments. Even if he is not a mystical, evil, godlike being, he is an absolutely astounding, eloquent person.

    To Mr. Welldone: Thank you sir. For everything.

    To Mr. Welldone’s haters: Gtfo my internets biatches

    -Nex

  11. KND opertive numba 1600

    man u guys are seriously immature and to the real mr.welldone…YOU ARE SUCH A WEARDO!!! but i do enjoy ur comments : )

  12. let me ask you this mr.welldone why did you write this to be stalking this thread, if you were leaving this so called world why are you still clinging to it with attention given by others in this thread?

  13. I liked how you repeated “I know where you are going”. Gives it more emphasis. I liked this one okay partially because it’s been overdone a lot in my opinion and I really did not see any real touch of creativity to it.

    Having read through a lot of coc- i mean, comments, you have a pretty large amount of pasta fame. As it goes, the second sentence still ruined it for me. Having an unknown entity that implies itself is Satan or some Dark Ruler of the Underworld may be scary at times, but coming right out and saying you are “Mr. Welldone” is scary on a scale of level 1 because you are human (i am assuming this is a fact LULZ).

    Anyway, a human writing about my birth & death is not scary in my opinion. Otherwise, very well written [:

  14. Ugh.
    This story was okay.
    But what’s the point in everyone leaving comments bashing this guy? Can’t you just accept that he’s an interesting part of creepypasta and let it be?

  15. Mr. Welldone,

    I enjoy reading ‘Curious Things’ and find you’re posts entertaining.

    These imposters, however, are not. They have become very annoying and some are incredibly childish. I hope they all stop on their own. (Which I seriously doubt)

    I am asking you to give those who like reading you’re wordpress and comments some sort of sign to be able to recognize you in the future.

    I thank you.

    Di-Gala

  16. This was, well… Well done! :D

    Probably my new favorite pasta!
    For some reason, it actually made me smile.

    These pasta are really getting to me. I’m seeing things.
    Earlier this evening, I could swear this.. creature was in my tv, wiping away the dust. I hate it, but I love it. I honestly think I’m addicted to the horror and thrill pasta gives me.

  17. None of you truly Understand the works of Mr. Welldone.

    He has posted, 14 posts from me.

    And I do believe he is who he is.

    Do not try to impersonate him, you do not know what the dire consequences will be.

    He is very existent and I do not want to know what he has planned for everyone.

  18. I guess i’ll offer a contrary opinion here and say that i rather enjoy the Real Mr Welldone’s comments (even if they’re probably written by some nerd or two in a basement with nothing better to do.)

    they’re interesting, and i kinda like hearing his input on the (hopefully) horrific tales that i have come to love from creepypasta.

  19. @ the real Mr. Welldone

    Sir I say good day for your tales have inspire a new side of this “life” and has shown me a path to that which only you could explain I thank you for this creepypasta and for your help in the path I am chossing…

    Thank you for you time Mr Welldone

  20. Snowden, I kid you not. I’m not Mr.Welldone. really.

    It’s actually really rather irritating that you would think that of me.

    I use big words, and that makes me someone else? That’s just silly.

  21. Hello.

    I am Mr. Welldone.

    That is who I am in this life and in the next.

    As to having “no life,” that is an entirely subjective statement.

    To my senses, it is the great lot of you unseeing, unhearing, unfeeling, unavailing husks who have “no life.”

    But you would disagree, would you not?

    Comfort yourselves with your paltry notions of worth. Warm yourselves with the fires of volitional idiocy.

    When all things are in place and the End is called down, there will be no comfort to be had.

    You will see.

    You will not understand.

    1. Au contraire, my darling Mr. Welldone.

      Although I can understand that you’re trying to strike fear, or perhaps some twisted form of enlightenment, into the hearts of your readers, let me give you some advice.

      People like us- the ones who know what the truth, The End, really will mean… Well, we’re looked down upon. Viewed as pariah by those who really should view us as gods. You in particular, Mr. Welldone.

      They don’t understand us. We aren’t like them.

      They have no idea what The End means. They strive not to understand, but only to fear what they don’t understand, if that makes sense.
      It’s pointless convincing them.

  22. so, who is mr welldone? what is his backstory? and who is he in real life becuase hes abviously just some blogger with no life

  23. To all those getting pissy about imposters, it’s called satire. I realise that this Mr Welldone character isn’t actually serious about what he writes, and that he just does it to entertain us (and even if he is serious I still don’t care and have no hard feelings). I personally find his comments pretty amusing myself. But that doesn’t mean I’m not going to make fun of him and his writing style. And that’s just all that it is – fun. Stop being so oversensitive please.

  24. @132
    That was actually me. The computer I’m on (the school’s computer) sets the names as any random person’s on said page. It is quite annoying.

    I apologise, Snowden. I didn’t mean to take your name. I’ll be more careful next time. ><

  25. @132
    It wasn’t as though I was implying that evil. And yes, I’m well aware most aren’t as they act on the internet. Please, do not talk down to me. The guy was just being a douche, and I felt the need to argue.

    Don’t we all? That is, after all, why there are so many comments on this story. Flamers and people arguing.

  26. @ 127

    LERNIN 2 COMPREHENSION.

    First off, no one is saying he cannot. He’s more than welcome to pretend he’s whatever he wants, hell, I pretended I was an astronaut as an eight year old, it was fucking GREAT. But on the flip side, those of us attached to that ever important concept called “reality” should be entitled to scoff at it. A coin must have two sides, after all.

    Second, this is the internet. If people are assholes in real life, the added anonymity of the web is too good to pass up. After all, I’m sure Welldone doesn’t act in reality like he does on this site, because that just screams “Don’t talk to me, I collect female teeth and make necklaces.” The world isn’t gumdrops and rainbows, and that doubly applies to the tubes.

  27. @ 99

    Indeed.

    It would appear, though, that people think my namesake is worthy of a legion. Comment 98 wasn’t even me. Suh-weet.

    On to Lilhorn, though, he’s definitely Welldone. That’s apparent from the same seemingly higher vocabulary that he recycles throughout his comments. I guarantee you he uses that same thesaurus we’ve all grown to hate.

  28. @ 126

    Life is no fun if you can’t act and be as you wish. By all means, if someone believes they’re something, why piss on their parade? Just because you’re devoid of an imagination and your proud to be just another boring, two demonsional figure doesn’t mean you have to drag everyone else down.

  29. The imposters are awesome, if you’re going to roleplay as some omnipresent nihilist, you better expect some people to laugh at you for it.

  30. I liked it.

    Shit, why is this guy such a popular topic? Even for the imposters that seem to hate him so much, Mr. Welldone is one of the most discussed things on this site.

    Okay, fine. He uses big words. Fucking grow a pair and get over it, or just keep bitching and repeating the word cocks because you’re so much better than him.

  31. Hello.

    I see that this telling of my tale has certainly garnered a great deal of attention. Although I cannot say I am pleased with my impersonators, I respect their ability to do as they please, just as I do. I have come to let you know that there are no hard feelings, and I shall be returning shortly.
    Good day.

  32. What I seem to find most annoying is that these imposters find themselves amusing still, even after weeks of carrying on the same tired idiocity. Should you choose to draw out the same tired tom foolery, at least take on some new material. Your lack of creativity and originallity bores me. At least entertain me while you go out of your way and act out like spoiled little whelps….

    How very nettlesome…

  33. Good evening.

    I hold no grudge against these impostors, I very much have grown a liking to them.
    Indeed, for they say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.
    The reasons they might be doing it is of no interest to me, however.
    I hold no anger as I know they will be the first to perish from this world into oblivion.

    Now I must depart, for those cocks won’t be suckled on their own.

    Goodbye.

  34. Jesus Tapdancing Christ

    The impostors – although I guiltily admit giggling at a couple of them – are being pretty immature. Alright, you don’t like him, awesome. You’re allowed to not like him. I don’t like him, either. But there’s really no reason to ruin it for everyone else.

    Of COURSE he’s not the harbinger of the apocalypse. We know that. Everyone with half a brain knows that he’s just playing a character. But he’s doing it for the entertainment of others, and there’s no reason to ruin that.

    We all know horror movies aren’t real, but if you didn’t like one, would you go stand outside the theatre and scream “THE DIRECTOR OF THIS SUCKS COCKS!” at all the fans who were coming out?

    No, of course you wouldn’t. Because you wouldn’t be protected by your precious internet mask. Jokes are all well and good, and so is expressing your opinion – but being a dick, is, well, just you being a dick for no good reason. :/

  35. oi! can you imposers stop imposing im trying to spread my damn message in a damn serious way! DAMN YOU IMPOSERS TO HELL!

  36. To the real Mr. Welldone,

    You are the most pretentious, arrogant cockmongler I’ve ever been displeased to come across. Every good pasta I’ve read, you’ve always found some way to ruin it. So shut the fuck up. You’ll be doing all of us readers a favor. Also to Miss Betterdone. Marry me. That will be all.

  37. Snowden: I’d say not, due to the difference in typing styles. Same wavelength, though.

    Anyway, aren’t you meant to be in Catch-22, pushing up daisies?

  38. I love how people get all uptight about things that are only here to entertain you.

    If they fail to do that, then the back button is always your friend.

  39. I’m going to laugh myself to tears when you lot find that this actually holds more truth than you are crediting it for.

    One day, you’ll be ambling about in the Darkeness, and you’ll bump in to this peculiar fellow that calls himself Mr.Welldone.

    You will rue the day you were born.

  40. WOW *claps* It’s far better than Welldone’s.

    At least his posts. I wonder what the new (temporary) moderator of Welldone’s wordpress is gonna post.

    *scoots off*

  41. Mr. Welldone won’t talk to me. I think he finds my presence to be an insult to his unique form of reality-altering online blogging.

    But I’m really quite awesome!
    Read MY wordpress, it’s like tons better, I promise.

  42. Good lord, when exactly did all these Mr. Welldone imposters become so hostile to any mode of expression beyond monosyllabic grunts, 4chan meme’s and vulgarity? In case you didn’t remember, philistinism is not something to be celebrated, it’s merely tall poppy syndrome in effect…the sociological form of the bully with a tire iron waiting to ambush the straggling science/drama/AV club enthusiast. Gratifying, but not cool.

  43. Hello.

    This immaturity is very disappointing, I would have expected more from duelers of the dark, seekers of madness. I must now depart for those cocks wont suck themselves.

  44. Good Morning. (Couldn’t help it. Forgive me, I pray you. xD)

    I thought this was quite creative. Mr. Welldone sir, I believe you are a creative genious and quite the creep fellow.

    Good Job..or should I say Well done?

  45. OH yeah, he says that he will be away for a while, stated in one of his posts on his site.

    So he’s not going to visit us in a while >:D

  46. Okay, we all get he’s a contraversial figure hereabouts, and we’ll be free to bicker and argue ad nauseam about him wherever 3 or more are gathered. But we aren’t looking at the real important issue here. Namely… WHO WAS MRS. WELLDONE?

  47. Hello.

    I visit when I can. I am very busy though, as you can well imagine. All those dicks aren’t going suck themselves.

  48. Stop being so juvenile. Your comments are just plaguing these comment boards. If he really is just some person without a life, so what? Grow a pair and get over it?

  49. @71 Wowza! I hadn’t made that connection, but I can see it now.
    The only part that I hated was “interred into the dirt-” So I’m placed into the grave into the dirt? Lrn 2 dictionary.
    I’m sure most of you hated “I will see your desiccated corpse pumped full of superficial chemicals.” I thought it was too wordy too, but it’s not meaningless. I guess he means that you’ll have no soul and the chemicals will try to cover it up. I would have put, “I will see your dryed husk painted with cheap whore’s make-up.
    I really loved the last paragraph. hope to meet you in the catacombs when I visit, Mr. Welldone.

  50. Comes across as a junior college creative writing student who’s got more ambition than talent. Stop indulging this guy.

    I hope creepypasta.com doesn’t go the the route of petty in-jokes after this.

  51. You know the secret to picking out welldone imposters? The real one always links to his site with his name, although I assume that future imposters won’t make that mistake after this post…

  52. @ 56

    I think the only people you risk angering the imposter/s him/themselves.

    Then again, they could spam your inbox with useless junk if you do. D:

  53. WELL YOU STUPID DICKHEADS OF COURSE I’M NOT SOME MAGICKAL SUPREME BEING,I’M JUST TRYING TO HAVE SOME FUN?KK?
    Fucking morons have the bad habbit of screwing everything up.

  54. @ heidi:

    No, he really did write this. It’s posted on his site.

    On another note, I feel like a terrible person for laughing my ass off at some of these comments xD

    Though I have to say, as unnerving as he is, I’m starting to feel bad for (the real) Mr. Welldone. I hope he doesn’t feel like he’s being driven away.

  55. Meh.

    I find Mr. Welldone tolerable in the small doses that are his comments to this site. His “manifesto” (for lack of a better word) is not.

  56. Hello.

    Several weeks ago, on my evening stroll, I noticed the other product of my otherworldy lust, your sister, on the other side of the street. She was dressed quite whorishly despite her considerable girth, but her humongous buttocks aroused the cyclopean denizen of my undergarments in ways it had never experienced. Using the Dark as my ally, I followed her to her automobile and, without warning, bent her over the hood and unleashed the eldritch invader into her anus. Her shrieks of pain, fear, and finally joy echoed through the empty streets. And when I let loose with my mighty load, all homes in the neighborhood were showered in a thick layer of unholy man-chowder.

    Your sister’s memory may have failed her due to the sheer trauma. However, if you visit her now, the memories will flood back, and it will bring about an orgasm so hard that her face will melt. It will be wonderful.

  57. Ugh. The Mr. Welldone schtick is so obnoxious. And he seriously needs to start reading more than just the thesaurus: you can’t just USE the words, you must use them CORRECTLY.

    And seriously, no one’s buying into the idea he’s anything but a neckbeard with a sword collection hunched over a computer, eagerly awaiting the next creepypasta.com update so he can roleplay some more.

  58. Hello.

    As some of you may have noticed,I have the extremely annoying habbit of starting all my posts with “Hello.” Nobody thinks it’s awesome, but I’ll continue to do it just to piss you off.

  59. WHO WAS PHONE, I think you should be allowed to delete comments made by imposters.
    They’re really, really, fucking annoying. >.<

    Cool pasta, btw. Sometimes seemed like you were trying too hard to fit in big words, but the overall effect was not lost.

  60. i think perhaps there are 2 or 3 different mr. fancypants impostors. the only one i even have a mild chuckle at is the one that tries to copy his format.

  61. The Person Formerly Known as 'Noneya'

    Its almost ten.
    Ive had several sodas and hot coaco drinks today.
    Ive also just gotten a book Ive waited, literally, YEARS to get.

    I broke down and had a complete giggle fit throughout this entire thing, and Im still chuckling. Im sorry, Im sure tomarrow it wil be very frightening, but all Im thinking is “Hey, maybe Mr. Welldone will become a popular internet meme!” and “Lulz, Mr. Welldone got a creepypasta!”

  62. i’m so sick of the mr. welldone impostors -_-

    i like the way mr. welldone thinks…but i agree, it’s bordering pretentious…

    i’ll wait for my death before i see the dark, i don’t need welldone to show me =\

  63. Hello.

    I do not suck cocks. I am quite heterosexual. You see, not only did I watch and masturbate with enthusiasm to the copulation leading to your conception, but I also took part in it. As I spread apart your mother’s flabby thighs, I recoiled in horror at the sight of the hairy, tuna-smelling canyon that awaited me, but I did not shirk my duty. The colossal anaconda residing in my trousers burst forth and impaled her. The limp-membered coward you know as your father did nothing to stop me, instead staring wistfully at my majestic pork sword. I let out an unearthly roar as my vile glop filled your mother’s birth canal, then crept back into the night. Ask your mother some time who your real father is. As her head explodes, be happy to know that you have helped to bring about the End of Times.

  64. the funny part is that i doubt Mr. Welldone will be posting anymore… thats sad, his comments were always the most interesting, its too bad so many people try to take his name and sully it

  65. “ewww you watched my parents having teh smex?” for half of the story ._.;;

    thats what i was thinking the whole time >.>;

  66. Hey there
    “You read these tales and you do not know that with each you read, with each you create and recreate, with each you retell, with each you claim ownership of, you beckon the End.”

    COPYpasta, stories which you COPY and PAST(A)E, creepy stories = creepypasta

    P.S. I did this just to be a asshole who points out the obvious

  67. I was turned off by the number of misused big words. Maybe that was intentional, but good god, it reads like it was written by a thirteen year old introvert with a thesaurus.

    And that is not to say i do not appreciate it being posted, I shall always appreciate every story posted here, i just felt the need to share my comment.

  68. …I’m sorry, after that first sentence, I couldn’t stop thinking “ewww you watched my parents having teh smex?” for half of the story ._.;;

    But once I got over that and reread it: twas very good. :D

  69. Dear Lord. We don’t need a story about Mr.Welldone. Sheesh.Yeah, he’s his own creepypasta. Woo whoooo.

    @7:Exactly. And we don’t need that.

  70. This is a post from his blog o.O
    It still fucks you up. What fucks you up even more is reading his blog. It’s so awesome.

  71. YAY MR WELLDONE YOUR TALES OF DEATH AND AGONY NEVER FAIL TO LEAVE ME CURLED UP IN THE CORNER TREMEBLING.
    I await your comment on this one.
    Oh wait…

  72. *tilts head*

    I was wondering when this would first be put up. I found it quite well done (lulz I swear that was unintentional!) when I first read it.

    Ah, the legendary Mr. Welldone. I remember when he came around.

  73. In before Mr. Welldone.

    WHO WAS MR. WELLDONE?

    actually, i wonder if he’s the guy(s) in the mirrors and behind the windows, and following us in the dark

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