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I Am Sam

I am Sam.

I have reached the gates of Hell. I entered without fear. I met the Lord of All Evil, and we made a deal. I got back to Earth, with a task.

I have to kill 665 people before I die. If I do so, I will spend eternity as a Demon King in Hell, with my own Legion to command. Of course, I’m very delighted by that perspective…

There is one condition, though: I cannot just kill random people. There is a trigger: if they hear one simple incantation involving my name, they are eligible to be my target. I managed to make my job easier, putting this spell into a book, a famous one, so that many people will probably hear it. I am very smart, indeed.

So, after you hear the deadly sentence, I will know you. And, when you are least expecting, you’ll see my shadow out the corner of your eyes. And when you turn your head to see what that was… it will be too late.

I will be waiting untill you hear my name again.

Sam I am.


Credited to Creepy Mole.

Posted in Beings & Entities 1 year, 6 months ago at 11:59 am.

134 comments

134 Replies

  1. OH SH-

  2. HackerOnHacker Feb 28th 2009

    Ha, I liked this one. It can be either creepy or funny depending on how you take it. And this is just my personal preference, but I’d rather there not be any Hell motifs or anything related to the Christian mythos. Of course, it keeps the story more simple, but I’d like to see something different.

  3. the Person Formerly known as 'Noneya' Feb 28th 2009

    Epic lol’s.
    I KNEW Seuss was an evil bastard, I KNEW and nobody believed me! HAH!

  4. And 665 people have definitely heard that by now, so we have nothing to worry about.

  5. Anonymous Feb 28th 2009

    FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

  6. OAIEBH Feb 28th 2009

    Dayum

  7. Dr. Seuss Feb 28th 2009

    BUT WHO WAS CHILDREN’S AUTHOR?

  8. That made me LOL. Heee good one!

  9. the grinch Feb 28th 2009

    scary much.

    ahhh!!

  10. Dr. Suess fucked set me up? THAT BASTARD!

  11. OH NOES!!

  12. Green Eggs Feb 28th 2009

    You sneaky bastard, you.

  13. Oh dear God. O.O

  14. Goodchild Feb 28th 2009

    So this is kind of like Candlejack, where if you say his name you d

  15. *holds up crucifix made of green eggs and ham*

  16. fsdtasdr Feb 28th 2009

    HAHAHA THAT’S THE BEST :D

  17. I lol’d

  18. Direct Impingement Feb 28th 2009

    GOD DAMNIT SEUSS!

  19. Not really as creepy as other self-referential pastas.

  20. Temporary Wounds Feb 28th 2009

    OH NOES!
    Till he was saying the thing about putting a spell, I was wondering what that book was and what his name was.
    Until he reminded me.
    O.o
    Creepypasta.com is HAUNTED.

    Reminds me of the ‘Eisenhower’ one for some reason.

    Good job.

  21. Temporary Wounds Feb 28th 2009

    Fuck you, Sam.
    What a smart bastard.

    Oh, and also, it’s ‘until’ not ‘untill’ .

  22. Lavistria Feb 28th 2009

    That kinda sucked cock. Saw the end coming I’m afraid, too predictable…

  23. Dirjel Feb 28th 2009

    ROFL

    Awesome.

  24. Miss Betterdone Feb 28th 2009

    HOLY FUCK HOLY SHIT OH FUCK OH FUCKING SHIT SHIT

  25. kateums Feb 28th 2009

    i really liked that movie, too. ):

    i think this was good, not too creepy though, but well-written. more interesting and thought-provoking than creepy. in a way, it reminds me of Candlejack, because anyone who says his name gets killed just like anyone who hears Sam’s does t

  26. Nathara Feb 28th 2009

    BUT WHO IS SAM?

  27. GODDAMNIT! O_O

  28. I_R_SCARED Feb 28th 2009

    Meh, too unbelieveable, predictable and unoriginal

  29. Anonymous Feb 28th 2009

    OH NOEZ I ARE DED NOW

  30. Highlordmugfug Feb 28th 2009

    Delicious pasta is delicious. I like the return to a more actually creepy pasta style as opposed to the short stories that have been getting posted. I loved the stories too, I just don’t think many of them qualify as creepy pasta.

  31. Someone Feb 28th 2009

    Whoa, this wasn’t bad. In fact, it was very good. Short and to the point, just like a creepypasta’s supposed to be. And it leaves a lot to the reader’s imagination… brix were almost shat (takes a lot to scare me).
    9/10. Moar patas like this one.

    Also, WHO WAS SAM?

  32. Someone Feb 28th 2009

    Pastas*

    … not patas*
    ._____.

  33. Aguythathatesrap Feb 28th 2009

    Sam I am.

    OH SHI-

  34. No fair, my name actually is sam

  35. FUUUUUUUUUUU

  36. Eulogy Feb 28th 2009

    THEN WHO WAS BOOK?

  37. Keindrae Feb 28th 2009

    oh god oh god

  38. Comment Leaver Feb 28th 2009

    ;_;

    This is awesome. Way to put an awesome twist on such a simple thing.

  39. Caedus Feb 28th 2009

    oh crap. That was actually very good. I read it once and laughed a little cause it reminded me of Dr Seuss. But then i realized. The book he was talking about was…

  40. Anonymous Feb 28th 2009

    BUT WHO WAS DR SUESS?

  41. but who was dr suess????

  42. anon~~~ Feb 28th 2009

    holy carp.

  43. OH SH- indeed

  44. Shuleeps Feb 28th 2009

    I like :]

  45. Ma Cherie Feb 28th 2009

    So pretty much anyone who reads Dr. Seuss is screwed.

    Who was green eggs and ham?

  46. FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

  47. Mookster Feb 28th 2009

    it’s like candlejack on steroi-

  48. Dr. Seuss Feb 28th 2009

    WAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!

  49. i do not like green eggs and ham, i do not like them, sam i am.

    am i the only one that thought that?

  50. Nakhash Feb 28th 2009

    I do not like green eggs and ham, I do not like them Sam…

    Leave me alone…no…No…NO…NOOOOOO!!!!

    AAAAARRRRRGGGGH

  51. FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-

  52. Anonymous Feb 28th 2009

    I should of been dead a long time ago then. *Looks behind shoulder* Phew…

  53. Eh. Would’a been better if it were based on something more modern. Green Eggs and Ham was published in 1960. I doubt anyone who read this was one of the first 665 people to read GEaH, so the scare factor is gone. No one here has anything to be afraid of.

    Overall, not a bad idea, just not relevant to us. Tell this story to those guys. They’ll shit golden bricks.

    Actually, wait, they’re dead.

  54. Anonymous Feb 28th 2009

    this was good, simply because it’s simple and it works.

  55. Okay, seems I aimed for a target and hit another. I should have noticed the book was 40 years old already, or at least put more people(maybe 1079, hm… 9_9).

    On the other hand, though, I just like this short style of pasta. But if people won’t post it… make it yourself. ^_^

    So, thanks for the comments, and sorry for the lameness of the implications… ^__^;

    (Also, maybe Sam’s killing post-mortem… Who knows?) >=D *Dun dun DUNNNN!*

  56. OH U

  57. TheCoffinDancer Mar 1st 2009

    Its good. Really good.

  58. Anonymous Mar 1st 2009

    o.o WHY SAM?!?! *looks around with a shiver*

  59. I am Spam,
    Spam I am…
    *spasms*

  60. Azriel Mar 1st 2009

    I rofl’d.

    Though as for the Hell and Satan thing, it’s ridiculous. Satan doesn’t rule Hell, it’s his eternal prison. And even if he was the ruler and not inmate #1, he wouldn’t let any of his prizes out of his grasp.

    Also, if the position of Demon King were a vacant spot, wouldn’t it go to someone who killed more people, like, say, Hitler?

  61. Shuriken Mar 1st 2009

    Wow. I seriously didn’t get that until the last sentence. That’s awesome.

  62. Lachesis Mar 1st 2009

    Hmm…is this the Son of Sam, or his father? I’d dread to think what kind of hell-spawned sumbitch would emerge if it was the latter.

  63. Timmy Mar 1st 2009

    I do not like green eggs and ham

  64. Anonymous Mar 1st 2009

    godamnit dr suees godamnit

  65. Mreee Mar 1st 2009

    OH SHIT IT’S LIKE CANDLEJACK; IF YOU SAY IT YOU DIE.

    OH SHIT HEY LOOK I’M NOT DEAD. YAY.

  66. apple juice Mar 1st 2009

    Wow, he’s taking his time to get to me…

  67. omg lolololololol
    Dr.Seuss is associated witht the devil then?

  68. blackneonsharpie Mar 1st 2009

    major lawls. XD

    I read the last line with tears in my eyes. It made my day.
    Would be scary if I hadn’t laughed so hard…

    (Man, I am having such a blonde day, I almost spelled “laughed” as laft. XDD)

  69. Poopies Mar 2nd 2009

    I gotta stop reading these at night… *cries*

  70. that was so not scary

  71. Hhaaa; Mar 2nd 2009

    Hahaaaaa.
    God, I love Dr. Seuss; XD

  72. chromeninja Mar 2nd 2009

    dam u clever little devil you got us

    (very well written we liked it we expected something at the end that you read like the molly one but this is better cause we did not relay pay attention to the title)

  73. Bootler Mar 2nd 2009

    Theodor Seuss Geisel born March 2, 1904.

    Happy birthday Dr. Seuss.

  74. Are you my mother?

  75. Creepypastry Mar 2nd 2009

    @ Temporary Wounds:
    Well fuck you too then! lol. I find this one all the more enjoyable cause I’m named while I can claim credit for the JFK assassination I’m responsible for Dr. Seuss’ famed childrens book… Or am I? Muwahahahahaha- cough

  76. ururururu Mar 2nd 2009

    @Rais
    i am also named sam
    :S

  77. I am Iron Man.

    I have reached Pepper Pots. I entered her without fear. I met the terrorists, and we made a deal. I got back to America, with a task.

    I have to kill 665 people before I die. If I do so, I will spend eternity as IRON MAN, with my own suit to command. Of course, I’m very delighted by that perspective…

    There is one condition, though: I can just kill random people. There is a trigger: if they hear one simple incantation involving my name, they are eligible to be my target. I managed to make my job easier, putting this phrase into a comic book, a famous one, so that many people will probably hear it. I am very smart, indeed.

    So, after you hear the deadly sentence, I will know you. And, when you are least expecting, you’ll see my shadow out the corner of your eyes. And when you turn your head to see what that was… it will be too late.

    I will be waiting untill you hear my name again.

    I AM IRON MAN

  78. Gegner Mar 3rd 2009

    Azriel is correct. Almost all religions that believe in a supreme being ruling Hell (only one being) have them not as evil, just as the ruler of the dead. And the religions where there is a Great Evil of the religion, the Great Evil rules Earth if anywhere, not Hell. Hell is reserved as the place of punishment for evil beings - human and otherwise. And, as Azriel stated, any evil being with supreme power would not give an inch of it unless they HAD to, and I doubt a human would be worth the prize.

    So, yeah, I laughed. Not creepy, just “blah”.

  79. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

    That was funny. :) Creepy? Eh, I guess I’m just weird…. haven’t found one on this site to creep me out yet, and I’m still looking.

  80. Somewhat creepy but not really beliveable. I like it though..

  81. carrot Mar 4th 2009

    Would have been a little better if you didn’t copy Dr. Seuss.

  82. Rasec Wizzlbang Mar 4th 2009

    BUT WHO WAS BOOK?

  83. Hippie Mar 5th 2009

    that was creeppy…maybe it has to do with the book Green Eggs and Ham…

  84. Midnightgirl Mar 6th 2009

    LOL I LOVE THAT BOOK! One of my favourite poets…but why aren’t i dead yet?
    lol i love it XD.

  85. Mr. Phenix Mar 6th 2009

    I greatly approve of this :D

  86. egads Mar 8th 2009

    I’m torn between going “OH SHI-” and laughing my ass off.

  87. Carrot Mar 12th 2009

    Green eggs and ham is the most terrifying story ever written.

  88. Carrot Mar 12th 2009

    lol, the Ads by Google on the bottom of this page are all Dr. Seuss advertisements

  89. Who is Sam?
    I am Sam.
    Sam I am.

  90. granger Mar 13th 2009

    that was amazing scared the holy jesus out of me and gave me a fear of god but amazing none the less

  91. BUT WHO WAS SAM!

  92. ben dover Mar 13th 2009

    I really like this one

  93. FGSFDS Mar 13th 2009

    FGSFDS

  94. astrosimi Mar 14th 2009

    At first I was like
    :O

    Then I was like
    XD

  95. FAWKES Mar 14th 2009

    this story was good, but i dont believe it, i mean its like saying that when you say candlejack you will disa

  96. I think I would’ve been better without mentioning the book. It took away from the creepiness a bit for me. It’s such a popular book that I think people would still understand it. All in all, delicious pasta.

  97. Daniel W Mar 15th 2009

    Haha! That’s one of the better ones. I love stories that are kinda creepy at first, then the last sentence makes your heart skip a beat and you get freaked out. I love it!

  98. Claire Mar 18th 2009

    Dumb.

    Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay more that 665 people know the book and also the movie.

    They should have chosen a bigger number.

  99. shortys roc my sox Mar 20th 2009

    would you like some green eggs and ham said sam i am

  100. wiseman Mar 24th 2009

    I absolutely LOVED this

  101. Oh crap.

  102. wraithvenge Apr 21st 2009

    lol…
    samuel alexander masilvic (seuss’ full name, before he changed it lol)
    nice one XD

  103. Snipergirl Apr 22nd 2009

    :D

  104. sounds like a crackhead i used to know. his name wasn’t sam though, it was johnny.

  105. Murderously Sweet May 13th 2009

    *snaps fingers* Drat.

  106. my name is sam.
    ;)

  107. David Berkowitz May 19th 2009

    Why do I feel like this Creepy-Pasta wants me to buy .44 Bulldog and look for women to murder?

  108. PewPewLaserGun May 21st 2009

    Bring it, bitch.

  109. Natasha May 26th 2009

    cool.

  110. HeroinWolf May 31st 2009

    More for a good lawl, an appetizer of sorts. Not creepy but sadistically comical. Pass the pasta!

  111. horrorfang Jun 15th 2009

    lol’d

  112. Anonymous Jul 12th 2009

    My light blew after the pasta was finished many brix were shat.

  113. tacopants Jul 12th 2009

    holy magic flying carp on a broomstick!

    nice..

    good thing my childhood sucked ass meaning I’ve never read a Dr. Seuss book

    cookies for me

  114. DeaD Mau5 Jul 14th 2009

    @Azriel:

    Well Sam did make a deal with Satan. I don’t think it matters how many you kill. And it’s not like he was killing them himself, he just told others to go do it.

  115. horrorfang Jul 14th 2009

    I feel rather silly everyone keeps posting about how this is like candlejack and now I cant stop loling cus I have never read that story all that comes to mind is that old freakazopid cartoon where he fights candlejack
    we just need a cage and some pumpkin pie!!!

  116. It’s like if Candlejack put his name in a book and then stabbed whoever read that b

  117. Seems kind of wimpy for some friggin demon-person to not like green eggs and ham? D:

  118. He spelled until wrong,
    but other than that this is a clever clever pasta.

  119. ill kill ya all niggas!

  120. green eggs and spam anyone? XD

  121. lolwut Dec 27th 2009

    OMG LOL xD

  122. ASEANYMOUS Dec 29th 2009

    BUT WHO WAS SAM?

  123. wutlol Feb 18th 2010

    OH SHI-

  124. maybe it’s just me, but i didn’t get it at all. What book is he talking about?

  125. Anonymous Apr 4th 2010

    i got chills not creepy but definetly awesome best twist ever

  126. Excellent. fantastic. I… I am speechless.

    Fear the Darkness

    -Nex

  127. Anonymous Apr 23rd 2010

    Do not like green eggs and ham. :(
    I do like this pasta though. Omnomnomnomnom~

  128. I WILL FUCKING KILL YOU ALL

  129. His Bitch Baby. May 24th 2010

    ohh ahitt! im to pretty to diee!!! :OOO

  130. Non-moose Jun 12th 2010

    I will not eat them a house, I will not eat them with a mouse.

    THERE’S A REASON WHY THEY”RE GREEN.

    Beautiful.

  131. Willow Jul 24th 2010

    My name is Sam :)

  132. mesohungry Jul 31st 2010

    hehe, I thought this was creepily funny. I have taught kids how to read with that book.

  133. I really like this one!
    I’ll be waiting and watching for you, Sam.

  134. Anonymous Aug 30th 2010

    Shit, I should’ve eaten the Green Eggs and Ham!


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