Exorcisms
Exorcisms are often the theme of horror movies. Most people shrug them off and think that they are fake.
They’re not.
But they are also not the way Hollywood portrays them to be. Instead, when a mere mortal tries to perform an exorcism, the demon leaves its original host, and enter the priest’s body. More than likely though, since they’re priests, the demon has no control over them, and soon leaves. However, there are certain instances when the priest lets the demon take control over him. The demon is wiser this time around though, and does not completely take over the body, which would cause another exorcism. This time, he gently influences the thoughts of the “priests” to do horrific things. Since priests have knowledge and experience in the “Spiritual Realm,” the demon can curse people, damn people, the works. The people around the priest have no knowledge of his demonic possession, and neither does he. After meditating on demonic practices, the priest and demon become one, allowing the demon to enter the world as a physical being. Once in this dimension, the demon has almost unlimited power.
Over 150 people have been found dead after fighting with priests on Sunday morning the following day in the past decade. Take these words of advice; don’t fight priests, and if you do, carry a Bible on you at all times for at least twelve days.
I’m not sure why, but I really like this one.
THEN WHO WAS DEMON?
I don’t get it.
The last paragraph completely ruined what could otherwise have been an excellent pasta.
“Don’t fight priests”? Why would we want to anyway?
old pasta is old
Uh… In the Exorcist, the most well known movie about exorcism, the demon leaves the girl enters the priest’s body at the end. So… you meant it’s exactly the way Hollywood portrays it?
well thats good and fine wit me. i wasnt plannin on fightin no preists anyway
Confusing grammar ruined this pasta
Feerst? Also, I don’t trust priests anyway!
i was all aboard on this pasta until the last paragraph. who the fuck fights priests.
wrong, priests can’t damn people. that’s only in movies.
It’s on the north side of boring.
It was decently written, but the ending was almost comical.
oh i see
Meh. This is confusing. Who is going around fighting priests? Or did I read this wrong?
>.>
This story sucked.
Especially when you used “damn” as a verb.
The ending killed it. Who makes a moral of a story; “fight with a preist and they’ll fuck you up”?
This is moronic. DON’T FIGHT WITH PRIESTS CUZ THEY’RE REALLY SECRET DEMONS OMFG SCARY!
Ah…Not all that creepy.
this was not very good. :/
FIRST
How random, only 12 days?
This pasta was raw and did not digest well. Recommend not eating here.
This is fucking dumb.
Are you suggesting that Christianity is creepy?
Thought you were going to go with child rape with the subtly influencing the priests’ thoughts.
don’t fight priests
The question is, who ever -has- to fight a priest?
what bout mexican drug smuggler priests
So I can’t go around punching priests in the face randomly anymore? Fuck.
HEY YOUS GUISE, DON’T BE FIGHTIN’ NO PRIESTS.
fight priest; eat bible
Ha! Glad to see I was not confused. The preist fighting thing is wierd!
Well … fuck. Guess my priest fighting days are over.
Well; I can’t be the only one who thought of child molestation…
I expected it to be a joke, and the end was, truthfully,slightly comical.
Why the Hell would I wanna fight a priest???
I mean jeez really.
same hackeronhacker, something new about this interests me, like someone exorcised to demon of stale pastas from this site.
This is so f*ing stupid
“don’t fight priests”? that reminds me of the zombie killing priest from Dead Alive.
Who the fuck fights priests?
hahaha rofl dont fight a priest??? I don’t know what type of weed you are on to type a story like this
Fact 1: Priests are mammals.
Fact 2: Priests fight ALL THE TIME.
By far one of the dumbest ones I’ve read.
Just wow.
Jesus tits, pastas these days are getting worse and worse.
Have a nice day!
BUT WHO WAS 150 PEOPLE WHO WERE CRAZY ENOUGH TO GET INTO RANDOM FIGHTS WITH PRIESTS IN THE LAST DECADE?
You know, I’ve met plenty of priests, but I’ve never noticed them having any sort of sort of spiritual connection. Unless you mean their connection to a bottle of whiskey
WHICH EXPLAINS WHY THEY RAPE BOYS
Does this mean i cant falcon punch Father Thomas anymore?
I thought of child molestation, too. When I read the story, that is, I don’t really think of it that often.
Anyway
According to my Shit-O-Metre, this pasta’s shit-y-ness ranks OVER NINE THOUSAAAANNNNDDD!!!!11!!!one!!!
good pasta …not creepy but good
Beat Priests
Piss off Demons
I’m going to go get in fights with preists now. dis pasta wuz teh redartedz.
I really like how it says that exorcisms are not anything like how Hollywood portrays them… and then immediately sets our with what is essentially a paraphrase of the ending of the Exorcist… which is one of very few movies where exorcisms take place. Well done.
Damn, this rule about no more fighting priests makes me angry enough to piledrive one of them through a flaming table…Oh wait.
eat priest; fight bible
lame pasta
Damn, and I was planning on curb-stomping that bitch Father Flanagan today.
hahaha. “don’t fight priests! keep a bible on you AT ALL TIMES fooooor 12 days!”
wtfffff, stupid pasta is stupid
Aww man…. does this mean I can’t fight anymore priests?
I was gonna be the world champion priest fighter.
was this made up as you went along?
No father…
You are the demons!
my dad is a priest..
i think i should go worn him about this..
wut? This is some bad pasta.
how exactly is that supposed to be creepy? “carry a bible for 12 days” my ass.
maybe i don’t get it cause i’m a jew. -shrug-
Can we fuck priests? Let’s fuck priests.
Retarded.
Little boys, surrender now
I knew there was a price to be a priest.
But this is old, Priests can’t fight silly.
Hey I liked this one :/
Maybe the end isn’t comical if you stretch your mind muscles to make it think, “You know, this ‘priest’ is really a demon, so he’s probably doing some serious shit, so you don’t wanna try to tango with this muhfugga.”
Even then it is still comical, since no one fights priests to begin with. Perhaps if there was some fad where you knock the everloving shit out of Father Troy every Sunday, but that is clearly not the case, thus the scare factor is totally diminished.
Next time I fight a priest I’ll make sure to carry a bible. Thanks…
I really didn’t like this pasta at all.
This IS how Hollywood portrays it.
The “advice” at the end was comedic.
Wasn’t creepy at all. D;
fight priests; save altar boys
Heh, what a coincidence, I was just listening to Dimmu Borgir’s ‘In Sorte Diaboli’, wich means ‘in direct contact with the devil’. Anyway, I think it was okay, but not very interesting. And i’m not going to follow your advice, otherwise I have to bring a freaking bible to my weekly priest owning lessons. you don’t know how much that weighs, do you? (not so much, but i’m too lazy.)
Dang. Looks like I won’t be fighting that priest.
Now, I’ve made a comment on a previous entry, but I like the IDEAS of pretty much all the creepypastas. The length and lack of detail turns me off.
Oh, thanks for the advice, I was just going to punch out a priest I know.
Now I’ll just beat them to death with a bible, I guess.
Shan: “damn” can be a word. Cain was damned, for instance.
Story was pretty crap but whatever, I’m always down for the religious angle.
Utter shit. Sorry, but utter shit.
BUT THEN WHO WAS CATHOLIC PRIEST CHILD MOLESTER
Great set-up, nice idea and then it just falls flat on its face in that last paragraph. Poorly done.
Seriously, man, what the fuck?
So, the moral of the story is that if you try fight a priest, they’re gonna fuck you up?
I hope this is meant to be funny, or I dread the future of creepypasta.
THEN WHO WAS
THEN WHO WAS
THEN WHO WAS
I really hate you guys.
That’s what must have happened to the priest we have now… he’s a new transfer and a captain asshole.
Isn’t this like…exactly what happens in the exorcist?
The power of Christ compels you!
No kidding! I talked to a priest once and I FUCKING SWEAR I could feel some sort of aura. It gave a feeling… indescribable. Like he was suppressing me. They are evil man.
I fought a priest by taking down his shields and stabbing him in the back. After he was down, I looted his corpse and began to camp him at least twenty times just for teh lulz. Face it, a priest will always lose to a rogue.
i love to watch movies which are based on demons and exorcisms!
\"Take these words of advice; don’t fight priests, and if you do, carry a Bible on you at all times for at least twelve days.\"
That line ruined what was an otherwise decent pasta.
Don’t fight priests = Laughing for a full minute.
The last paragraph just killed the seriousness of this. At first it was a wee bit creepy, and I was expecting a bone-chilling ending and I get “Don’t fight priests”? Theend wasn’t scary, it was just silly.
Priests: They will ruin your shit.
what…? i generally enjoy most of the stories creepypasta gives me, but this… this?
Lol, I’m pretty new to this site, and I thought the last paragraph did utterly destroy the story, but oddly enough I ended up enjoying this then most other pastas simply because of the comments left in response to that last paragraph, a lot of them cracked me up. Hell if anything this pasta actually got me to read all the comments posted, I never do that.