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A Camp Fire Story, of Sorts



Estimated reading time — 3 minutes

December 10th, 2003

My frozen hands tremble as I fumble to work my little butane lighter. The tips of my fingers are raw and bloodied already, and I wince in pain with every failed attempt to spark a flame. Finally, I achieve a jittery fire which impatiently dances atop the lighter. I carefully lower it to my pile of kindling, and the fire cautiously creeps out and spreads until it is a healthy size. I watch it for a while, tending to it until it’s strong. Now, there is enough light to see around me, and enough heat to survive the night.

Here, deep in the forest, with everything frozen and quiet, the only light and sound comes from my fire. It is the whole world to me right now. It dances and sings in a raspy, crackling voice to me and I am happy to enjoy its company. I can almost imagine that I can hear it whispering and babbling happily.

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“It’s so cold.”

I must be tired. I’m hearing things. The popping and sizzling of the fire is really beginning to sound like words. Maybe I’m just lonely out here. Maybe I just really want someone to talk to, so I’m hearing coherence in the chaos of the fire. I could have sworn I heard it say –

“It’s so cold.”

There it was again, softer this time. I lean closer to the blaze and its warmth caresses my face, setting me at ease. I’m listening intently now, anxious for what I’ll hear next.

“If you let me die tonight, you‘ll die tonight.”

There was no mistaking it. It said it clearly, albeit in the raspy, singsong voice of a fire consuming wet branches. Yet even as the words become clearer, they become softer, drawing me in closer to make out the next statement. The warmth splashes over me as I inch my face closer, and the frost that had settled in my bones begins to thaw. The fire is speaking constantly now, chattering quietly to itself, and I can only pick out bits of words and portions of sentences.

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“Get closer. Watch closely. If I die, you die. I’m the only thing keeping you alive. Pay attention!”

The fire ends its tirade with a loud snap of burning wood and then is quiet. I lean in even closer, eager to receive whatever secret is coming next. The heat is no longer pleasant. It sears me as the flames playfully lick at my face. The fire is being coy, teasing me with its silence to see how long I will wait on it. The smoke reaches into my nostrils and the embers float carelessly from the heart of the fire into my eyes, which are now welling with ash. I don’t care. I just want to hear what comes next.

“Get closer. Pay attention. Watch closely, now more than ever…”

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December 17th, 2003

“In other news, the charred body of an unidentified man was found deep in the mountainous forests east of the city. Investigators have stated that the man appeared to have caught fire while sitting by his campfire and, inexplicably, did not appear to have made any effort to extinguish himself. His burned remains were found, frozen in position by the icy temperatures, leaning over the ashes of a long extinguished fire. In what is most perhaps the most bizarre detail of the grisly scene, the man is reported to have been found with an ‘expectant‘ smile still on his face.”


Credit: David Feuling (AmazonTwitterFacebookRedditPatreon)

This story was submitted to Creepypasta.com by a fellow reader. To submit your own creepypasta tale for consideration and publication to this site, visit our submissions page today.

Check out David Feuling’s critically-acclaimed trilogy of novellas, The American Demon Waltz, now available on Amazon.com.

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All three novellas in the trilogy described below are included in the compilation:

“Bravo Juliet” is a survival horror military thriller, and the first novella by acclaimed fiction author, David Feuling. It tells the story of an elite soldier serving under US Army Special Project: Acrylic Geist, before she is betrayed and left to die in the wilderness of war-torn Vietnam. Brutal injuries, debilitating sickness, and the growing Lovecraftian threat of “The Maw” test not only Bobby’s will to survive, but her grasp on sanity itself.

“Witness to Those Waiting” is the second book in the “Bravo Juliet” series. Master Specialist Barbara Balk returns to investigate the subterranean mazes carved out beneath Kosovo’s towns and streets. From her entry through the Ngordhje churchyard, she must face undead horrors and ancient evils alike in her quest to return to the surface with answers.

“Vechnaya L’Vitsa” pits Corporal Barbara Balk against new foes in the depths of U.S. Covert Command Outpost (USCCO) #241. Leading a team of six soldiers and tasked with defending the experimental LISEMEC superweapon until it is ready to fire, can Bobby hold out long enough while under siege? Her resolve will be tested by supernatural forces, enemy sabotage, and the expansive Antarctic wasteland itself.

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87 thoughts on “A Camp Fire Story, of Sorts”

  1. Pasta doesn’t explain why man is in forest or why fire is speaking. (I just read my sentence back and it doesn’t make sense either so XD). Also, it’s kinda unrealistic… if talking fires were real it would be weird still. And the last part, never bring opiniative adjectives in when desribing a dead body. Wide smile, sure. Skull-cracking grin, bringiton. But expectant is just kind of…unpleasant for anyone reading it. Keep it formal. But I like how it wasn’t the “last thing I ever wrote” kind where the narrator is writing it down. It’s original, too, if not a bit creepy. I was expecting more though. If this has the right ending, it could be a 9/10. sorry that didn’t happen. 6/10 for this little guy.

  2. i didn’t really feel any emotion from this pasta. it just felt boring and poorly written. it has a decent story, but it just felt boring to read. nothing big to catch your attention

  3. could have been a much tastier pasta if it had been set up better. i.e. don’t start it out as a journal if it’s only going to have one entry and then a fake entry of a news reporting.

  4. Man in the Mailbox

    Pfft, what a jerk fire. I mean, seriously, he basically ATE that dude.

    Pretty interesting… sort of. Not the best, I mean, it was kinda translucent, but it was enjoyable. Last paragraph kinda butchered it. I mean, we know the fire went om nom on his face, stop telling us it did. Sooo… overall, 4/10.

  5. so there is absolutely no chance of the guy being crazy and hearing voices in the fire. Homicidal fire? that’s a stretch. He put his face in the fire because he was FUCKING CRAZY from the extreme cold.

  6. “What’s that fire? You’re searing my flesh? DO GO ON!”
    This made me lol irl.

    That aside, was a good pasta. Short, quick, and clever. I do wonder what the fire said to make him have an expectant smile though.. Was it, “Hey, I’m burning you to death.” Oh fire, you cheeky bastard you! *wag finger*

  7. It just seems kinda lame. I expected it to really go somewhere, but it was cloyingly predictable. Also, what kind of news reporter talks in detail about the facial expressions of a charred body?

  8. ohhh it’s calcifers evil twin brother Reficlac!
    yeah like every other commenter is saying i saw it coming. It wasn’t that good of a pasta but i guess it was OK.

  9. Meh….I liked the idea, but i’d think a guy would have to be pretty damned stupid, even in a situation like this, to lean that close into a fire. Like I said, the idea of homocidal fire is certainly interesting, and a bit creepy, but….Eh.

  10. I think this would have been stronger if you cut out everything except the last paragraph. It is a singular image, vague, slightly unsettling and effective at making the world seem a slightly darker, weirder place. A little more Dylatov Pass, a little less obvious.

  11. …I thought the fire was kinda sweet. And the guy was kinda stupid. I think I liked it, kinda.

    What’s that fire? You’re searing my flesh? DO GO ON!
    — Anonymous, That’s funny. >,<

    ..Can they tell it the guy was smiling when his body was charred?? Hmm.

  12. It would have been better if the voice had done more to get the character’s attention. I know if I felt MY face burning, I’d sit the fuck back.

  13. i thought something totally different.
    Like if the fire went out he would freeze to death…
    but this isnt very creepy..but interesting

  14. Who the fuck is retarded enough to listen to a fire, and then lean in so they can get burned? Shitty premise, shitty execution and shitty overall.

  15. Saw the ending coming, and the way that the whole piece was worded really diminished the eyrie factor. Otherwise plot wasn’t bad.

  16. "The eternally unimpressed" Anon

    Saw the end coming about a quarter of the way through. It’s a little retarded the way the guy dies.

    The fact that it doesn’t explain why he was stuck in the mountains and his motivation for being there/staying there/getting there, will I’m sure, no doubt impress some of the readers who comment in their “hurr durr I so deep” way. Don’t you hide now, anons.

  17. It kinda had potential, I suppose. But instead of doing something cool with a major loltwist ending, it went exactly where I expected it to. “It’s cold, the fire’s talking, I gotta get closer.” And even before you said that exact same line with different words 12 times, it was easy to predict that the dude was gonna just jump straight into the fire and get his freak on with the talking flames.

    6/10. Right below average good but right above just boring old average.

  18. heh… it would be intresting if somthing of the sort actually came on the news but this was a bit to short and i agree that the last paragraph kinda killed it

  19. You had potential dude. The last time a fire started talking to someone it created a series of religions that may yet destroy the word. Good premise but poor execution.

  20. I knew what would happen from the moment he started leaning in. The writing wasn’t bad, but the story predictable. And if the body was charred beyond identification, how was the smile still visible?

  21. MisterVercetti, how can something be literally stupid? Or figuratively stupid?

    This was kind of average. It wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t great either.

  22. really predictable, but pretty amusing. the whole last paragraph just killed it though…we kind of get the gist, right after “The heat is no longer present.”

  23. Not the best I’ve read… Predictable and not all that creepy… Though, I gotta admit, the idea of allowing yourself to burn is somewhat disturbing if you put yourself in that situation… But still, 2/10.

  24. If his face was in the fire, how could he possibly be identified as smiling?

    Would much rather freeze to death.

  25. It wasn’t one of those, “OMG I’m scared to turn off the light!” ones, but I liked it. Creepy in it’s own way. Well written in my view.

  26. I found this pasta average. I liked the direction that it was going though dying by being pulled in by fire was unique. I thought that something like the Wendingo or whatever it’s called was gonna come out and eat him.

  27. MisterVercetti

    That was stupid, almost literally. I mean, it takes a pretty good moron to burn themselves to death listening for imaginary voices.

    Dumb as hell/10

  28. I t was okay, except for the “expectant smile” part. That was too cheesy. Should have been less detailed, like ” the corpse was still smiling” or something.

    I liked a lot of the descriptive phrases and alliteration in this one. Nice.

  29. I found it predictable, but I think it was a good, gruesome idea. To imagine allowing yourself to burn to death to escape the cold? Eesh. Personally, I think I’d much rather freeze.

  30. meh
    I’m not too impressed with this one. It didn’t have a real shocking ending, nor any real suspenseful aspect. Some crazy dude dies in the woods. Oh no!

    Oh, and in before “Then Who was Fire?!”

    1. Pencil on Paper

      This is a little late and this might not be my place to say but I just want to express my opinion on your comment. I personally feel you were a little rude. There could have been nicer ways to state your opinion yet you choose this way. I personally found it quite good. It was different. It may not have been as scary or horrific as people would like but it doesn’t mean you go around posting hurtful comments like this. Again, I am sorry, this is a little (correction – very) late and it might not be my place to say. But I felt I needed to express how I felt about your comment.

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